Heartland (12 page)

“Emily told me about the pregnancy.” EJ rested his hand on Emily’s arm. “Emily, I think you should go with your parents.”

Emily glanced at him and took strength in his touch. “I can’t. I’m afraid to go on the road again. There are too many temptations, and I’d rather risk Mike finding me here than falling off the wagon.”

Her father’s shoulders fell as he looked at the ground, then he slowly nodded. If anything would convince them the road was the most dangerous place for her now, it was the fear she could be tempted to use drugs again. “I understand your concern.” When his gaze landed on EJ, Emily shivered at the intensity. “Okay, I’ll take Abby and Johnny on the road with me, but I’m trusting you to keep my daughter safe.”

“I will.” EJ fisted his hands at his sides. “I won’t let anything to happen to her.” He turned to her and his pale blue shirt softened the hue of his eyes. “None of you can go anywhere alone.”

Her mother nodded. “We understand.”

Dad looked at Emily, concern etching the corners of his eyes. “Do you want to leave?”

She didn’t want to go anywhere before she had a chance to talk to EJ. “No. We’re here to celebrate EJ’s birthday. I can’t imagine being anywhere safer.”

Dad didn’t look convinced, but nodded and moved away with her mother.

“You should go with them.”

She faced EJ. “You know why I can’t. I truly am afraid of the road, but if I leave, Mike will follow us. I’ll never be safe, and neither will my family.”

“He’ll get caught long before then.” EJ pursed his lips, making them even more kissable.

“I’m sure he will. But is it before or after he hurts someone I love?”

He closed his eyes and took a breath. “I see your point. You have no intention of staying hidden here, do you?”

“Nope. I plan to make my stay in town well known. Now, let’s forget about Mike Ritter and celebrate you becoming an old man.”

He huffed and smirked. “Old…eh?”

She shrugged and held out the gift with a smile. “Happy birthday. I know there’s a table for gifts, but I’d rather you open this now.”

He took the package. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

She shrugged and folded her hands in front of her. “I’m hoping we can still be friends.”

“I’d like that.” He looked up from the package in his hand. “Especially since it looks like I’ve appointed myself your protector, and knowing what you have planned, you won’t make it an easy job.”

Heat flooded her face. “About that. I want to thank you.”

His gaze took on a fierce blaze as he brushed his fingers over her cheek, warming her flesh even more. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

She took his hand and squeezed it. “I know. Now, go on, open your gift.”

He chuckled and ripped the plain pale yellow paper from the plastic case. Upon reading the front of the CD, he snapped his gaze to hers.

Swallowing the sudden lump in her throat, she pointed to it. “I made it for you in Dad’s recording studio. Most of the songs have never been recorded before and are simple arrangements of me and my guitar or a piano. There isn’t anything fancy.”

“Thank you. I know I’ll love it.” His voice rasped and she almost didn’t hear him. He took a step toward her and for a split second, she thought he was going to kiss her, and her breath caught with the sudden desire for his lips to be on hers. She wasn’t sure if she was more relieved or disappointed when he smiled and held the case to his chest. “This is the best gift I could ever get.”

From the deck looking over the backyard, Tucker announced they would be serving dinner and everyone should choose their seats. She turned to head toward her parents’ table. He took her hand, stopping her.

“Join me?”

At the thought of spending all evening with him, heat warmed her clear through. “Are you asking me to be your date at your own party?”

With a chuckle, he shrugged. “I suppose I am.”

The excitement of spending time with him warred with the need to keep him at arm’s length. “EJ, I can’t be more than your friend.”

“I know.” A shadow passed over his eyes as he nodded. “That’s all I want, too.”

* * * *

EJ let go of her hand and led her to where the rest of his family sat at a long table in the front of the tent. Even his parents, aunt, and uncle had come from Arizona for his party. He introduced her to them. They graciously ignored her superstardom and talked about when she was a little girl.

He took Austin out of his mother’s arms and turned him to Emily.

She smiled brightly and took the little boy’s hand when he held it out to her. “Hello again, Austin.”

“Hi.” Austin giggled, then hid his face in his father’s chest.

“Since when are you ever shy?” EJ shook his head. “He likes you.”

“We had fun at Dad’s party last weekend.” She met EJ’s gaze, and the flame he’d seen in her eyes blazed hot enough to boil his blood. She might be fighting her attraction to him, but it was there.

He wanted her, and despite all of her standoffishness, she wanted him as badly. Could he only be her friend and now her protector? But how could he ever be more? She was the wrong woman for him, he knew that. What if she went back to using drugs? What about the baby? Maybe the reason for the secrecy was because she didn’t want it.

He put Austin in the highchair beside him and pulled out the seat on the other side of him for Emily to sit. A moment later, they headed to the buffet table filled with dishes holding grilled hamburgers, hotdogs, barbecue, potato salad, and corn on the cob. As they ate the delicious food, she charmed his family with stories of how EJ had teased her as a girl on the ranch.

After they’d finished the meal with chocolate cake, Emily excused herself, asking Judy if she may use the bathroom. EJ watched her weave her way through the tables and head into the house.

“You fancy her.”

Blinking, he met his dad’s solemn expression. “Emily is my friend.”

“You need to make sure that’s all.” His mother set her glass of sweet tea on the table and folded her knobby hands before her. “I’ve read some terrible things about her. You’ve been hurt once by a woman like her. You don’t need that again. Think about what it would do to Austin.”

They didn’t have to tell him twice. “I know. Now, will you please drop it?”

After several minutes, EJ began to wonder where Emily was. The DJ, who’d been playing a steady stream of country music from the deck, stopped an old George Strait tune mid-song. Emily sat on a stool in the center of the deck and tapped the microphone the DJ handed her. After a ping sounded over the sound system, she put it in the cradle on the mic stand the DJ set before her and shifted her signature guitar in her lap. “Hi, y’all.”

When the people gathered applauded, she held up a hand. “We came here tonight to honor a good man.” She met EJ’s gaze and smiled as the group turned and clapped their hands or whistled toward him.

He held up his hand and nodded his head once to acknowledge his friends and family. What was she doing?

“I’ve known EJ Cowley almost my whole life. When I was about ten, my cat Misty died. I was devastated until EJ came over to my house with the cutest golden tabby kitten I’d ever seen. For the next eleven years, Goldie was one of my very best friends.”

The people around him looked at him and smiled, saying, “Ahh” and “Oh wasn’t that sweet.”

His attention was fully on the woman on stage. A breeze ruffled her hair, and she ran her hand through the short strands to settle them off her face. “Sadly, Goldie passed away a little over a year ago.”

The statement brought a round of condolences from her audience. Tucker called out, “Since he’s nice, he should give you another one.”

As the party goers yelled out their agreement to the statement, Emily smiled. “Oh, don’t let EJ’s sweetness make you think he didn’t torment the heck out of me at times, too.” Several people chuckled, and she went on, “One time we went fishing with my grandfather and his dad. EJ thought it would be hilarious to put a frog down my shirt, knowing I hate anything slimy and gross. Remember that, EJ?”

He nodded and snickered. God, she was turning his world upside down. “I do. You let out a squeal to rival a war cry.”

The family and friends gathered laughed. She never looked more radiant as she winked at him. “I wrote this song for a man I’m quickly considering one of my best friends.”

Emily ensnared him as she played a sweet melody on her guitar then added a voice certainly blessed by the angels.

She sang about the times they’d spent together riding horseback over the ranch and of fishing in the river. About him giving her a kitten and the incident with the frog. She was the girl with long pigtails, and he was the boy who liked to tug on them. The song ended talking about a friendship that would never end.

By the time she was finished, he was totally under her spell.

He was falling for a woman he could never risk more than being friends with.

* * * *

Emily set her guitar in its case inside the dining area of the kitchen when she sensed someone behind her.

“You and EJ, uh?”

The voice startled her, and she spun around. As her heart returned to its regular speed, she grinned. “Trevor Marshall?”

The man standing in front of her nodded and smiled. Trevor had spiked dark hair, and was dressed in black jeans and a pale yellow shirt with the top button open. His style had always been different. While they were in middle school, they were best friends. He’d been the one who helped her through her mother’s divorce with Mike and his marriage to a woman she hadn’t liked. She’d leaned on him during the turbulent time of learning Seth Kendall was her biological father and Mike was a criminal. She helped him through his troubled teens when he discovered he had no attraction to girls. Most people, including his parents, had thought they were more than friends, but she knew the truth. Trevor was gay. He wrapped her up into a hug and held her for a moment. When he pulled back, he said, “How are you?”

“I’m good. What are you up to these days?” She ignored his first implied question and skipped the truth. She was anything but okay. Her nerves were shot with everything going on: The news of Mike being free, the attraction refusing to let her and EJ be nothing more than friends, the way everyone danced around her recent scandals. Even being in the house she’d grown up in was adding to her feeling of being trapped. Although Tucker Cowley and his wife had redecorated the ranch house and made it their own, she couldn’t help the flood of memories of times when she was little. Of Mike reading her bedtime stories, of him tucking her in, and telling her he loved her, of his leaving her mother when she was twelve to marry another woman.

What she wouldn’t do for a drink and the sweet oblivion she got from coke. The cravings had come upon her before, but nothing like this, and they reminded her that addiction and getting well would take more than coming home or staying away from the road.

“I’m in law school at Stanford University.” Trevor squared his shoulders and grinned.

“That’s wonderful. You home for the summer?”

He shifted his feet, his self-pride from a moment ago visibly deflating. “Yeah. Mom insists I come home.” With a scowl, he looked around the kitchen. “I’d rather stay in California.” He lifted a gold chain out of his shirt and looked at the gold circle at the end. “I miss Keith.”

She stared at the simple band for a moment. “You’re married?” A smile brightened his expression and he nodded. Truly happy for him, she matched his grin and hugged him. “Congratulations!”

As they separated, he said, “Thanks. No one else knows he’s not my roommate.”

Trevor shouldn’t feel ashamed or hide his life from his parents. Someday, he would break free of his mother’s control of him. Her life was one fucked-up mess, but she didn’t envy the Marshall children. No wonder Raquel ended up committing suicide, despite being married to one of the most wonderful men she knew. Although, Trevor divulged his secret, she wasn’t ready to tell him hers. “I’m happy for you. Your secret is safe with me.”

She picked up her case. “We’ll have to get together sometime.”

He nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets. “It was good seeing you again, Emily. I’m glad you came home.”

“Me too.” The need to escape and get away from the people outside become too much. She patted him on his arm with her other hand, which she couldn’t keep from shaking. “See you around, Trevor.”

She was halfway to the front door when EJ caught up with her. “You shouldn’t go anywhere alone.”

No, she shouldn’t and not because her psycho stepfather wanted her dead. With a deep sigh, she nodded. “I know. I need to get away from everyone.”

“Okay.” He studied her face as if he could see every one of her secrets and took the case from her, then led her out side. Once he secured the guitar in the trunk, he leaned against the frame of her car. “Thank you for the performance. I think it made everyone’s evening. Including mine.”

She stopped pacing. He grinned at her and the pull toward him overwhelmed her. The desire coursing through her for him was as demanding as the craving for coke. He could easily become her distraction from the irritating addiction, but she wouldn’t use him.