Heart Quest (4 page)

Ilex saw the tiny kitten sitting atop the round glass table and froze. His pulse thudded loudly in his ears. The kitten looked like a Fam. He tore his gaze away from it to Trif. Her expression was dreamy and she petted the little cat with a lovely hand.

Then the cat stared at him from sharp, blue eyes.
I am Greyku
.

His stomach knotted. His HeartMate had a Fam. His beautiful Trif of the volatile Flair had just become a target for murder.

He didn't know how he managed a calm manner or an easy smile when all he saw in his mind's eye was the heartless body of Gib Ginger.

“Greetyou, GentleLady Clover,” he said, and seated himself.

She glanced up and smiled. Greetyou.” Her brows dipped. “We're neighbors. I can't keep calling you Winterberry, though I haven't ever heard you called anything else.”

“Call me Ilex, please.” He ran an index finger down the tiny head of the kitten. “Greetyou, Greyku.”

Greetyou.

“How lucky you are to have a Fam,” he said.

“Yes, I hadn't anticipated having one for a long time, but D'Ash gave Greyku to me today.” Her brows lowered. “Though Danith D'Ash was too subtle to say anything, I think that Greyku was meant as a bribe to…” She stopped.

“We can talk about your quest shortly. Have you eaten?”

Yes,
said Greyku.

Trif chuckled. “Yes.”

“Would you like a drink?”

Nodding, Trif said, “I wanted to hold a table. It's busy tonight and I didn't know how the counterman would react to Greyku if I took her up there.”

“I'll get a caff,” he said. He wanted whiskey.

“I'll have a cinnamoncaff.”

I'll have a bowl of fluffcream,
said Greyku.

“I'll get you a small saucer, Fam. You aren't large enough to eat a bowl of fluffcream.” With a finger that seemed too rough and clumsy, he stroked her head. The kitten purred.

Ilex nodded and went to the counter, where he ordered the drinks and waited while they were being made. He unfocused his eyes and stretched his senses, sifting through emotions. Some people felt mild irritation due to personal problems, but there was no violence. In fact, the strongest emotion was pure fascination as the patrons darted glances at Greyku.

He paid for the drinks and returned to the table. The saucer had a small dollop of fluffcream. Greyku looked at it and wrinkled her nose.
More!

“It's enough,” Ilex said.

She eyed him, but stalked over to the saucer and began to lick daintily at the treat.

Ilex kept his gaze from the sweet cream on Trif 's lips as she played with her foaming drink. He burnt his mouth on his strong, black caff.

Trif shot him a serious gaze from under her thick lashes. “So, are you going to lecture me?”

Ilex winced inwardly. That's what she thought of him—an older, neighbor guardsman, ready to lecture. “Why do you attempt this quest?”

She tilted her head. “I know I have a HeartMate and I want him.” Her hand dipped into a pocket and pulled out an intricate key.

Everything in Ilex tensed at the sight of the key. It was a pretty gold key with loops and colored crystal jewels—and hearts. Fanciful and exuberant like Trif.

At least the object didn't have the powerful lusty Flair of a HeartGift. Just his luck that Trif wanted to find her mate, knew enough and had Flair enough to make the key to hunt him.

She wouldn't make a HeartGift until her Third Passage at twenty-seven, seven years from now.

He was sure from his vision that he'd be dead by then. He probably had a couple of years left—and the most he could allow himself was to see her. Though HeartMate attraction and love being what they were, she might develop feelings for him if she ever saw him as a man instead of an authority figure.

Ilex was more concerned with not giving himself away and not making a fool of himself. He'd move out of MidClass Lodge, or arrange that she return to her large and loving Family at the Clover Compound as soon as this danger to her was gone.

Right now he wanted to keep an eye on her.

Her head tilted, she was studying him. He'd been wrapped in his thoughts too long. He nodded to the key. “Nice bit of work.” His voice was harsher than he expected.

She flushed a little, her chin lifted. “More often than not my Flair is under control.” She fiddled with the key, dropped it back into her pursenal. “I want to find my HeartMate,” she repeated. “I'm tired of being alone.”

Ilex went motionless as anger rose.
She
was tired of being alone—Lady and Lord, he'd been solitary for years and now dared not claim her. Ruthlessly, he banished all emotion from his tones. “You're very young.”

She shrugged. “Clovers marry young. Several of my cuzes around my age are already wed. My HeartMate's out there. I connected with him during my Second Passage. A lifetime of love. Why wait?”

“So impatient,” he murmured.

Laughing, Trif stirred her drink again. “Just assertive.”

“But your Family and friends don't agree with your—adventure?”

“My quest. My HeartQuest. No, one approves. Not my family, nor my friend Lark Apple, nor my cuz, Mitchella D'Blackthorn. I tried to keep my—quest—quiet, but word spread.” She colored, then her face set in determined lines. “I won't quit. The charmkey will work, why not use it?”

“Because it could get you in trouble?”

“Catshit.”

“
Cat
shit?”

Greyku lifted a cream-covered muzzle and growled.

Trif grinned. “I started saying that when my friend Lark got her cat Familiar, Phyl. It irritated the kitten.” Again, a wistful expression crossed her face. “I miss Lark, all the way south in Gael City.” Trif shook her head, reached out, and petted Greyku.

“Couldn't you concentrate on bonding with your Fam instead of searching for your HeartMate?”

“It's not the same.”

“Of course not, but Greyku should keep you busy. Fams do.” Ilex leaned back, propping his elbow on the back of his chair. “Everyone wants Fams. But sentient animal companions are rare.”

“Yes, but at least I got a cat instead of a dog. Cats aren't so uncommon.”

He thought of his Fam, and she must have caught the shadow of expression on his face—or a pulse of emotion in the tiny thread spinning between them. Her eyes narrowed, and she pounced, like a cat. “
You
have a Fam, don't you?”

Before he could answer, she said quickly, “That's it!” She chuckled. “I knew you had a secret. But I've seen the shadow in the large inner courtyard at night. That's why you wanted a room facing the courtyard when you moved in, right?” She leaned forward. “Is it a feral tomcat?”

Heat crept up his neck. “A fox.”

“A fox!”

“Quiet. We aren't the only residents here. I don't want him trapped or harmed.” He smiled wryly. “And I doubt our landlord would understand.”

“I know who's here, nobody who'd care whether you had a fox Fam.” She glanced around. She'd greeted all the neighbors by name as they'd dropped by or as they left. Since she'd lived in MidClass Lodge longer than he and had a naturally curious bent, Ilex suspected she knew exactly who could be trusted with a secret. But he was uncomfortable that she'd sensed he was hiding something from her. What would she do when she finally figured out that his Fam was just one of Ilex's secrets?

“A fox Fam,” she whispered in awe. “Wild, and rarer than dogs.”

“I've planted additional brush near my windows.” And had opened a small door in the outer wall of his apartment, in case Vertic wanted to spend time inside.

She nodded. “I noticed. You didn't strike me as a gardening type, but people are wonderfully complex. That's what makes everyone so interesting.” She grinned.

“About your quest.”

Her smile flickered out.

Steeling himself, he leaned forward to curl his hand around her wrist. Warm, soft woman-skin. He ignored the heat spreading through his veins, the escalating beat of his heart. “Your days of prowling Noble Country are over. ‘Adventure' close to MidClass Lodge.”

“I did the Lodge months ago.”

He knew. He wouldn't have moved in otherwise. “Do your questing on busy streets. Not isolated estates in Noble Country.”

She snorted.

Ilex squeezed her wrist, released it. “You must be careful and take care of yourself, or I'll ensure your safety. I don't think you'd appreciate my methods.”

Expression darkening, she met his eyes. After a moment, she dropped her gaze. “I was wrong to trespass on Noble estates.” The tips of her ears turned pink.

“It's best all around if you limit your wanderings.”

She stared at him. “You have more than one secret.”

More than two.

“What's going on in the city? Like I said earlier, I feel a change in the…” She opened and closed her hands, grasping thin air. “Atmosphere.”

“I can't tell you.” He still didn't know her character as well as he liked, didn't know if she'd break a confidence. A Heart-Mate made for him
shouldn't
be able to do that, but who knows? He hadn't thought his fated woman would be so young. He'd paid little attention to HeartMates until that first staggering dream when she'd reached out to him.

As they watched each other, he could
feel
his face take on the stony lines of his profession, knew she'd draw away from him.

She leaned forward instead. Something inside him crumbled, and the word
folly
echoed in his mind and he knew he'd be foolish. He'd spend time with her.

Her head tilted again as if she was listening inwardly. How much of a connection was building between them? How much could she sense it? Finally, she said, “Is whatever you're working on why you want me to be careful on my quest?”

“You make sure you're safe.” He glanced at Greyku. “How loud can you screech, kitten?” From what he'd heard and seen, Fams always made themselves known.

The little cat opened her mouth, showing pointed white teeth and a pink tongue.
I can screech VERY loud
. She lifted her nose.

Ilex nodded. “Good.” Looking back at Trif, he said, “I won't report you and I won't curtail your activities if you keep in busy areas and
always
take Greyku with you.”

“What if I want to do a couple of blocks of houses after my work at Clover Fine Furnishings and Greyku isn't—”

“Those are my terms,” Ilex said. He'd like her to continue the search because it would distract her from him, from his work, would keep her busy. There were other ways—Flair ways—to protect her, and he'd arrange those too. He leaned back in his chair.

She frowned. “Or else you'll report me.”

“That's right.”

Pulling her hand from his, she stood. “I'll be careful.”

He didn't think she knew what the word
careful
meant. He kept his feet flat on the floor as she left. She only had to go through the corridor and up the stairs to the lobby, then to her small apartment. Sipping his caff, he used the small bond between them to sense her, and knew when she slammed the door to her rooms.

O
f course he dreamt of her. For the first time, he'd spent
more than five minutes in his HeartMate's company, and the meeting and emotions involved stirred his deep need for her.

So she played in his dreams—they played love games together—in his bed and in hers, which he could only imagine. In his mainspace. His large hands stroked and molded her high breasts, his tongue circled pink nipples, suckled, and her sweet moans drove him to higher and higher levels of aching passion. He awoke, tight with arousal, on fire for her, then spent some long moments under a cold waterfall. When he looked in a mirror, his face was tight, strained, showing dark stubble. And old.

If he'd been a precocious youngster, she could have been the age of his child's child. He shuddered, and his eyes went black with disgust at himself. Compared to hers, his skin was rough and weathered, and old. Compared to hers, his ideas were unimaginative, and old.

Compared to hers, his sexual experience was long and varied and…stodgy? Maybe not. Lady and Lord knew, his dreams of her, and more, the linked sexuality they'd shared, had been inventive and fresh, orgasms roaring through him like he'd never known.

He still wanted her, despite everything. His hands fisted at his sides as he gazed at the tumbled coverings of his bedsponge. He wanted her there. Now. Forever.

In the two years since they'd connected, he'd stopped having love affairs, even stopped having much sex—only when his body was desperate would he visit a friendly barmaid. Now that he'd spent some time with Trif, he couldn't think of sex with anyone else. He rubbed his face. How was he going to survive? How was he going to follow an honorable road and keep his hands off her?

By concentrating on his job. Unfortunately, his current case was all too horrific. So it demanded his best. He would
not
allow himself to be distracted. Going to his desk, he pulled out the sensorball from the first murder to study it again.

 

T
rif awoke, unusually happy for a Mor morning after the
weekend. She'd had wonderful, sweaty dreams of her Heart-Mate again last night. For the first time, she'd sensed emotions beyond the lust they'd shared—tenderness, perhaps even affection, or the edge of love.

Also, she had a Fam of her own. The small white kitten was curled sleeping on the pillow beside her. Trif eyed Greyku. The little Fam was right; she'd be much more striking if she was tinted.

Trif had dressed and eaten her own meal before Greyku strolled into the kitchen.
Breakfast time
.

“Yes.” She turned to the no-time food storage and pulled out a bowl of warm furrabeast-and-greens mixture that D'Ash had advised. Trif now had ten recipes of kitten food, and had made up a week's worth of meals and put them in the no-time, where they'd stay as fresh as when she'd cooked them. Placing the food on the floor, she watched Greyku take dainty bites.

“You are the most beautiful kitten.”

Yes
. Greyku swiped a bit of meat from her muzzle and grinned up at Trif.
And you are all Mine
.

That was one way of looking at it. Trif chuckled and tidied the apartment. It was small, but relatively expensive. Still, it was away from the Clover family Compound and she enjoyed living on her own. She wasn't impatient for her father, uncles, sisters, and brothers to finish up the construction of her own house within the Compound. She had the idea that by the time her townhome was done, she'd be ready to be surrounded by family again, though with her new Fam, the floor plan might need a bit of altering. Again.

They'd hate that, since she'd already changed the blueprint five times…and had wanted to change it five more, but if they'd built it as quickly as they'd promised, she'd have been living there for a year. Yes, Greyku would be an excellent excuse to revise the plans, incorporating all the other little touches that she'd thought of lately, but hadn't had the nerve to ask for.

She'd take Greyku to work with her to the family furniture business, and they'd eat dinner with the Clovers. As the only Fam, Greyku would be cooed over and spoilt by the rest of the family. Trif knew enough about FamCats to understand that the kitten would adore the attention and petting.

What do We do now?
asked Greyku.

“I don't work here. I work for Clover Fine Furnishings—in the business office.” She was trapped in the job, her Flair of past-visions led to no useful career. She'd been expected to take a place with the family firm and she had.

Greyku stopped licking a forepaw to look at her with wide, curious blue eyes.
Interesting
.

Trif grimaced. “Not really, but I'd like you to come with me.” She picked up a quilted basket that she'd previously thought Greyku would sleep in. “You can explore the offices and sleep near my desk when you tire.”

Will there be play?

Thinking of the other family members who worked in the office, most of them female, Trif said, “I see papyrus wads and string in your future.”

Good. Do We 'port there?

“Uh, no. We are middle-class people. I'm the one with the most Flair in the family.” She shifted. “There isn't a teleport pad area set up.” She had no idea when she'd be able to master that particular set of skills. It sure would be convenient, though.

Yet,
Greyku said, between licks at her paw and swiping her head.

“Yet,” Trif agreed. Who knew a kitten would be so amusing?

I will survey the office to make sure it is Fam-friendly
.

“Ah.” Trif choked on a giggle. “Good idea.”

The kitten sat up straight, lifted her chin.
I am ready. Call the glider
.

Eyebrows raised, Trif smiled. “We are middle class. The business only has freight-gliders.”

Greyku frowned.
How do We get to work?

Trif was pretty sure that Greyku would be doing no work. “We ride the public carrier.”

Greyku's eyes widened.
Very interesting to watch people. They will admire Me
.

“I think you've been spending too much time with T'Blackthorn's Fam.”

I only say what's true. You said I was beautiful
.

Laughing, Trif swooped down on Greyku and snatched her up, putting the kitten on her shoulder. The little cat dug in. “Ouch!”

You will need shoulder pads
.

“I guess so.” She glanced at the wall timer. “We don't want to miss the carrier.”

Will We see Ilex and Vertic this morning?

Trif 's pulse jumped at Ilex's name. She'd been irritated at him last night, but was feeling more charitable this morning. He wasn't going to report that she'd been trespassing on Noble property. That hadn't been a good idea anyway, just an impulse.

She picked up the charmkey and turned it over in her hand. It hummed with Flair. Only her Flair, not her HeartMate's, despite the dreams. But the emotions she'd experienced last night made her all the more determined to find him. Slipping the key into her pursenal, she slipped the pursenal on her belt and snicked it shut.

I want to meet the FamFox. I am not sure what a fox looks like
.

“I don't know whether we'll see Ilex or his Fam this morning. I believe foxes are nocturnal.”

So are feral cats
.

“
You
aren't feral. If you want a good life with me, you'll be a day cat.”

Greyku sniffed.

Trif left her rooms. At the far end of the hallway she saw Ilex, and hurried to catch up. He was dressed in his uniform—pristine brown shirt and creased, narrow-legged trous—and appeared grim and focused. Definitely a guardsman on a mission, and a dangerous man.

“Ilex,” she called, and his shoulders seemed to hunch; then he stopped and turned, meeting her gaze. His eyes were more blue than gray this morning.

He sighed at the sight of her. She looked radiant. Satisfied, and bubbling with energy and optimism—and Ilex knew he'd unconsciously lingered in his rooms just long enough so he'd meet her in the hall. He knew her morning schedule, had seen her catching the public carrier often enough.

He blocked all the hot images of her in his bed, and nodded. “Greetyou, Trif and Greyku.”

“Greetyou,” she said breathlessly as she closed the distance between them. “I wanted to apologize for being abrupt with you last night and to thank you for your restraint.”

He hadn't been restrained in their dreamtime loving. Heat crept up the back of his neck. She hadn't wanted him to be. He cleared his throat. “You received Fam Greyku from D'Ash yesterday, and your cuz is GrandLady D'Blackthorn, which means that she is wealthy, and also close to the Ashes. I advise that if you want to continue your quest, you have T'Ash make you a protection amulet.”

She frowned. “More conditions for your silence?”

“I don't want you hurt,” he said quietly, and he didn't have the Flair to protect her.

Her mouth twitched in a wry smile. “Thank you, but do you know how much an amulet from T'Ash would cost?”

“How important is your quest to you?”

That seemed to surprise her. She took a step back, glanced at her timer. “I have to hurry to make the next public carrier.”

We cannot teleport yet,
said Greyku.
There is no pad at My new day place, and We have not linked to try to 'port. I can teleport well.

He didn't like that he'd drained Trif 's enthusiasm from the day, though worry for her bit at him.

Before he realized what he was saying, he offered, “I had a nephew who had problems 'porting. I still remember the spell learning-program he used to establish the proper mental pathways. I worked with him, since I teleport around the city often in the course of my duties. I could help you.” The moment the words were out of his mouth, he regretted them. It would mean a lot of physical contact, which was what had popped into his head when he'd thought of the offer. But he hated the older/younger, authority figure/citizen image—and he was wrong there too. He
shouldn't
want her to look at him as a man instead of a guardsman or instructor.

She blinked. “You'd help me? The only learning program I know of is T'Bean's Teleportation Teacher.”

“That's the one. As I said, I went through it with my nephew.”

“Oh, I'd love to teleport better.”

It was for her own safety, Ilex assured himself. She might need it someday. “You know that teleporting takes a certain level of Flair, and can be quite draining.”

Her spine straightened. “You saw with my charm key that I can do good work. I
really
want to teleport well.”

Ilex thought she was in that stage of life where everything she wanted, she wanted with a passion. What was he doing, spending more time with this woman, his HeartMate, when he'd determined to avoid her? She was smart. She'd find out sooner or later that they were mates. Later would be better. “I'm busy tonight.” He'd spend time shoring up his control. “We could start tomorrow evening,” he found himself saying.

“Great!”

The little cat mewed.
I will help too. You will learn fast. Now I want to see the strange Fam the FamMan had in his thoughts.

That was disconcerting, having a kitten read his thoughts. “I don't know,” Ilex said, glancing at Trif. “Foxes have been known to eat cats.”

Trif drew back, horrified, curved her hand around Greyku protectively. Then she lifted her chin. “I can't believe any sentient Fam animal would eat another.”

“I think there are a lot of things you can't believe,” Ilex replied softly.

Again they locked stares, and he felt old when he saw the vitality in hers. “I didn't see Vertic come in yet,” Ilex said. “He may be sleeping in the bushes. He doesn't always come when he is called.”

Of course not,
Greyku said smugly.
No self-respecting Fam comes when called. Only lesser Fams like dogs do.

Ilex laughed.

Tilting her head, Trif said, “Laughing is good for you, you should do it more often.”

Stiffening, Ilex glanced at his wrist timer. “Doesn't the public carrier come in two minutes?”

With a horrified gasp and a quick word of good-bye, Trif took off at a run.

 

I
lex waited for GreatLady Danith D'Ash, the animal
Healer who placed all Fam animals, to authorize opening the greeniron gates outside the T'Ash estate. He contemplated his next move. The Fams of the victims were the only witnesses to their companions' deaths.