Heart of the Serpent: Hades' Carnival, Book 5 (2 page)

She’d had enough. “That’s not true.” Better to air things out between them then to go on like this. “I thought we were friends. We used to talk. You used to hang out with me.” And she’d longed for those evenings when he’d come by her little hole-in-the-wall apartment and she’d cook for him. They’d talk about current events and watch movies. “But since I moved in here, you treat me as if I have the plague.”

While Jessica liked all the warriors and had become friendlier with Stavros and Phoenix, Mordecai had become more distant with each passing day.

“You’re imaging things,” he began, but she cut him off.

“No, I’m not.” She fisted her hands in the skirt of her dress to keep from reaching for him. “When was the last time we ate dinner together, or had a coffee or hung out?”

“We’re hanging out now,” he pointed out. She hated his low, reasonable tone.

“Only because I came looking for you,” she challenged. “If I didn’t seek you out, I’d never lay eyes on you.” Her heart ached, but she pushed onward. “If you’ve changed your mind about me living here, I can find a new place. No hard feelings.” It would break her heart to leave him, but she’d do it if she had to.

He sat forward and raked his hands through his long hair. Her fingers itched to touch his hair, to discover if it was as soft as she thought. “I don’t want you to move.”

“Then what is it?” she pressed. “Am I being presumptuous? I thought we were friends.”

A low growl escaped him. An actual growl. It was a reminder he was more than just a human. He was an immortal warrior. A shapeshifter. She’d seen him shift into the mighty serpent, more dragon really, and he was a sight to behold. Deadly and dangerous.

“We cannot be friends.”

His words dug into her heart like sharp talons, shredding it. The pain took her breath away. It was quickly followed by a flood of embarrassment. She could feel her cheeks heating. She’d thought they were friends, but obviously she was no more than an obligation.

“I see,” she began, doing her best to keep from crying. “I’ll start looking for a new place tomorrow.” She couldn’t stay here. Not now.

“No, you don’t see.” Mordecai gritted out from between clenched teeth. “You don’t see at all.” His hands were clasped behind his head and the muscles in his arms bunched and tensed.

She stood, legs trembling, heart pounding. She needed to get out of here before she totally disgraced herself. The last thing she wanted to do was cry in front of him and add to the mountain of guilt he already shouldered over his past. She should have known better than to move into the same building with him. One he owned.

Maybe Sabrina and Arand would let her temporarily move into one of the apartments next door. Just until she found a new place away from Mordecai. Away from all of them. She wasn’t a part of their lives. Not really. They were all immortal and she was a simple woman, a human, who wanted to offer her heart.

How silly to think a man like Mordecai would be the slightest bit interested. Talk about fantasy. She’d fulfilled her family’s obligation to him, done her duty. It was time to move on with her life.

She took one step away but got no farther. His strong arms banded around her waist and pulled her back. She stumbled and fell onto his lap. He tilted her until her head fell back and she was staring into his black eyes.

“You don’t see at all,” he repeated.

Then he kissed her.

Chapter Two

Mordecai’s lips were firm but soft. His tongue snaked out from between them to trace the contours of her mouth. Jessica’s head was reeling. Holy crap. Mordecai was kissing her.

“Open for me,” he demanded.

Jessica parted her lips and he slid his tongue between them. She moaned and gripped his shoulders. Everything around them—the garden, the houses, indeed the entire city—disappeared as she lost herself in his kiss.

She ignored the warnings in the back of her mind that were telling her this probably wasn’t a good idea. She didn’t care. Far too many nights, she’d lain awake in her solitary bed wondering what it would be like to kiss him, to touch him.

And now it was happening.

Jessica let her hands roam over his wide shoulders and thick biceps. He was all hard muscle and sinew. A warrior in body and heart.

He cupped her jaw in his hand and tilted her head to one side. The angle allowed him to deepen the kiss. No, he wasn’t just kissing her. She’d been kissed plenty of times before. This was something different. She felt as though he was trying to consume her.

She’d never dreamed he felt the same way about her that she did about him. It was a heady realization. He pulled away, leaving her gasping for air. But he wasn’t done. He peppered her face and jawline with more kisses. Then he nibbled on the sensitive skin just below her ear.

Her entire body hummed with arousal. Her breasts ached for his touch and her panties were damp. “Mordecai.” His name fell from her lips, a plea, a need.

“I have to stop,” he muttered as he caught her earlobe between his teeth and gently tugged. Jessica felt the caresses throughout her entire body, a hot, pulsing need that throbbed in time with her heartbeat.

“No, you don’t.” That was the last thing she wanted him to do. After weeks of wondering and wishing, Mordecai was finally kissing her. And it was even better than she’d imagined. And she’d imagined plenty.

Heat came off his large body in waves. He was so big and solid. She smoothed her hands over his broad chest, loving the way the muscles jumped beneath her touch.

Sitting in the corner of the yard, lost in the shadows, with the thick perfume of the flowers and herbs surrounding them, Jessica knew if she let him go she might never get another chance. Mordecai might see himself as not as honorable as the other warriors because of the choices he’d made, but she knew differently.

Even though the light barely penetrated where they sat, her eyes had adjusted well enough for her to see his face. His jaw was rigid and she could tell he was trying to pull himself back under control.

She wasn’t having it.

Jessica reached out, grabbed his hand and pulled it against her chest until it covered her breast. She sucked in a deep breath when his broad palm covered her. Her nipple beaded against the soft fabric. She wasn’t wearing a bra beneath the dress and it was almost like he was touching bare skin. Almost.

And she wasn’t the only one who was aroused. His cock was fully erect and pressed against her hip.

Mordecai growled again, his eyes glowing and his entire body tightening. His fingers closed around her breast, and Jessica knew she’d won. He rubbed his thumb over her nipple. Even with the fabric separating them, his touch was devastating to her senses.

Her skin tingled all over her body. She was warm, almost hot. Empty and aching for him to fill her. She felt more alive than she had in her entire life.

Then he reached up and slid his fingers beneath the shoulder strap of her dress. His fingers grazed her skin as he slowly lowered the thin piece of fabric down her arm. It didn’t go down all the way, but it was enough to lower the bodice of her dress and expose her bare breast.

Mordecai sucked in a breath, and she could feel his gaze gliding over her uncovered flesh. “Beautiful,” he muttered.

He circled the hard nub with his thumb. Her breath quickened and her need grew deeper with each passing second. She wanted this man, this wounded warrior.

He leaned down and flicked her distended nipple with his tongue. She moaned with growing pleasure. His touch lit a fire inside her and it quickly flamed out of control.

She caught his hair between her fingers and held him to her chest. The thick strands slid over her skin. She’d been right. It was soft and silky, such a contrast to the hardened warrior. She kneaded his scalp, loving the way he groaned beneath her touch.

He sucked the tip of her breast into his mouth, laving the bud with his tongue. The sensation shot straight down to her pussy. She gasped and squirmed on his lap, wanting to get closer.

Mordecai pulled back and shuddered. She knew she was losing him. “No, don’t stop,” she pleaded.

He didn’t listen. He slowly, carefully, pulled the strap of her dress back up until her bodice once again covered her.

Mordecai had seen lost souls burning in rivers of molten fire in Hell. He wasn’t sure what they suffered was much different from what he was feeling at this moment. His tongue still tingled where he’d touched her pert nipple. His hands itched to caress more of her soft, supple skin.

And her scent. Dear goddess, her sweet scent was making him crazy. He could smell the vanilla soap she favored, but beneath that was the unique perfume of her arousal. Sweet and spicy and all for him.

He wanted to throw back his head and roar, but that would only bring the other warriors running. Not to mention it might also bring the neighbors and the police. At this moment, he hated living in the city. If they were alone on a deserted mountain, he could claim her as his own.

No.

He couldn’t claim her. He shook his head and tried to clear his thoughts. There was a reason he shouldn’t touch Jessica. He just couldn’t remember what it was with her sitting in his lap offering herself so sweetly to him.

Reality slammed down with a heavy thud. That was the problem. She was innocence and light. And he was tainted beyond redemption. She deserved better than him. Even if the thought of another man touching her full breasts, kissing her lush lips made him want to kill, he knew he had to let her go.

His fingers had a mind of their own and stroked over her bare skin next to the strap he’d pulled back up. He couldn’t believe he was dressing her. If that didn’t nominate him for sainthood, nothing would.

Mordecai buried his face in the curve of her shoulder and simply held her. As if sensing his inner turmoil, Jessica wrapped her arms around him and stroked his shoulders and back. After thousands of years of being alone. After decades of existing in Hades’ realm, her touch was a balm to his soul. It was given freely, without cost or expectation. And that made Jessica a gem among women.

She knew he was rich, knew he could give her anything. Yet she asked for nothing. In fact, she was very careful not to take advantage. It still bothered him that she wouldn’t take the apartment rent free. Not that he’d cashed the check she’d given him. And if she pressed him to do so, he’d simply set up an account in her name and deposit the money into it. No way was he taking money from her. Not after she’d risked her life to return his other half, his very soul to him.

He owed her everything. There was nothing he could give her that would ever repay her for what she’d given him. He was indebted to her and her grandmother for all they’d done for him. Her grandmother might have released him from the curse, but he’d never been drawn to her, not like he was to Jessica.

“Are you okay?” she asked. Once again, he could hear the concern in her tone and knew it was genuine.

He raised his head, already feeling bereft even though she was still sitting on his lap. “I’m fine. You?”

She studied him before nodding. “I’m good.”

She was more than merely good. The scent of her arousal was still wrapped around him, chaining him to her more tightly than the heaviest god-forged steel ever could.

But it was time for him to prove his mettle, to be a better man than he’d been. He lifted her from his lap and placed her on the bench beside him.

“Why?” She touched his bare forearm and his cock jerked against the zipper of his pants. He could only imagine how it would feel to have her soft hand gripping his hard shaft. He shuddered and slid along the bench until she was forced to drop her hand back down to her side.

“This is wrong.” He knew if he stated the reasons she’d refute them one by one. But that didn’t change the facts. He was immortal and she was human. But he could share his immortality with her, a sly voice in the back of his head reminded him. It was the Lady of the Beasts’ gift to the remaining unattached warriors. If they found a mate, they could make her immortal.

He would not submit a woman as pure of spirit as Jessica to a life chained to a monster with a blackened soul. Because that’s what he was. No, for once in his eternal life, he had to put someone else first. That meant he had to protect Jessica from himself even if it killed him.

Jessica made a sad sound, drawing his attention back to her. He knew he’d hurt her, and that had never been his intention.

“It’s not wrong if we both want it.” She hesitated and then stood. “I don’t understand your reasoning, but I will respect it.”

When she turned to leave, Mordecai felt his heart shatter. That surprised him. He’d thought his heart long hardened. He stood and reached out, clamping his hand over her shoulder. “I’m sorry.” Such inadequate words to express what he was feeling.

She turned and faced him. Standing like this, he was reminded of how tiny she was. She had such a big spirit and vibrant personality it was sometimes hard to remember how delicate she was.

“But you won’t change your mind?”

He shook his head. “I can’t.”

She absently rubbed her breastbone like her heart hurt as well. Maybe he was being stupid, but he treasured Jessica too much to drag her into his personal hell. He had to fight his own demons. Maybe somewhere down the road, once he’d come to grips with everything he’d done.

No, that way led to madness. He had to let her go.

Jessica squared her shoulders and straightened her spine. Even then, she only came to mid-chest on him. He expected her to turn around and head back to the house. But, once again, she surprised him. She stepped toward him, reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down.

He went easily and was rewarded when she kissed him.

Her lips were as sweet as honey. They parted easily for him, inviting him to partake of the bounty of her mouth. He was too weak to refuse.

Just one more time. Then he would walk away.

Their tongues tangled and dueled. He let his hands roam down her sides and around to her butt before cupping the full mounds in his hands. He squeezed her behind and then lifted her right off her feet. She gave a startled squeal and tightened her hold around his neck.

Mordecai easily held her weight. In truth, he could carry her around for eternity and never tire. She squirmed in his arms, trying to wrap her legs around his waist, but the fit of her dress was too tight to allow it.

Probably a blessing in disguise.

He eased her back down to her feet and forced himself to release her. The serpent inside him was breathing fire, demanding he keep her. The beast would have him spirit her off to a cave high in the mountains where no one could ever harm her or steal her from him.

But he was more man than beast. After decades of being separated from his serpent, it was no longer as much a part of him as it had been. That saddened him greatly. The two parts of him were together again, but not fully integrated. Living in such a highly populated area didn’t allow for him to shift either.

Another reason it might be better for him to leave. But he couldn’t. Some instinct was warning him not to leave Jessica. And if there was one thing he did listen to, it was his instincts. They’d saved his life more than once.

He was finally forced to remove her arms from around his neck. He gripped her hands in his, careful to temper his strength, and gave them a squeeze before releasing her. “You should go inside.” His voice was rough, but he couldn’t help it. He felt raw. Exposed. Angry.

“You know where to find me,” she told him. Then she turned and slowly walked back to the house. She paused beneath the light over the back door and looked back. He stayed deep in the shadows.

She shook her head and went inside, leaving him alone in the dark. He watched, but she didn’t return.

He was alone. Just as he was always alone.

Inside him, his serpent snorted, a reminder that he was there. Mordecai didn’t think, didn’t hesitate. He embraced the serpent, allowing the power of the beast to flow through him, filling every cell, every crevice. His body changed, his limbs contorting and expanding. The top of his head flattened and his jaw elongated. His skin became thick and leathery as armor-like scales covered his entire body. About twenty feet long from the tip of his snout to the end of his tail, he didn’t have room to really stretch out and certainly not enough space to walk around.

But it was enough.

He folded his wings over his back and was careful not to breathe fire. The last thing he wanted to do was damage the yard and houses. He closed his eyes and settled in the courtyard. Like some mythical beast from a fairytale, he was content to protect the princess in the castle. No one would hurt her while he lived. No one.

Hades wasn’t happy. Years of planning down the drain. Not only had his plan to take over the earthly realm and gain ultimate power over the humans and the gods failed, but he was stuck in a gilded cell on Mount Olympus. Even worse, he was forced to listen to the lectures of his brothers almost ever day. And, really, both Zeus and Poseidon were tedious on their best days.

It had only been a matter of weeks, but it felt like a lifetime. It made him appreciate the Lady of the Beasts all the more. After all, she’d survived five thousand years of imprisonment.

Still, he burned for revenge against the goddess and her warriors, especially Mordecai. The serpent had tricked him for decades, pretending to be on Hades’ side when all the while he’d been working to help his fellow warriors. Hades had put up with the arrogant creature for years because he’d needed him for his plan. All the while, the serpent had played him false. Even worse, Hades hadn’t realized it.