Heart of Light (17 page)

Her breathing increased as Cam took several slow steps toward her, leaning in slightly, his breath warm on her neck.

“You look beautiful tonight… Jolene.”

He pulled back, smiling at her. The more time he spent with her, the more captivated he became. He loved staring into her eyes, the blue far more clear than any ocean he had ever seen. Her face had a younger quality to it and when she smiled, it lit up the entire room. It lit up his entire world, too, and he vowed to do everything he could to make sure she smiled more often.

His eyes roamed her body, taking in the little black dress she had on. It clung to her curves in all the right places. It was tasteful and slightly revealing at the same time, the V-neck of the halter accenting her chest.

“Enjoying the view there, surfer man?” Jolene asked sarcastically.

Cam immediately raised his eyes to meet hers. “I’m… Well…”

“Now we’re even.” She walked past him down the stairs and waited next to his Lexus. “Are you coming or do I have to take
myself
out to dinner?!” she shouted back at him, placing her hands on her hips in a show of playful irritation.

He smiled as he made his way to his car, thinking to himself that he would never tire of her attitude. Opening the door for her, he reminded himself to respect her boundaries. It proved difficult as his nature was to want to help her into the car. How could he possibly resist holding her hand? Or pushing the few errant curls out of her eyes so he could see her gorgeous face? But he had to. He kept telling himself that all he wanted was to be near her, and maybe the more time they spent together, the more comfortable she would be with him. Then maybe she could finally let him touch her because, at that moment, it was taking all of his resolve to
not
touch her. Her milky skin had such a beautiful glow to it. It almost shimmered. He could only imagine how soft it would feel against his own. It broke his heart a little knowing that someone screwed her up to the point that she couldn’t bear the thought of anyone touching her, no matter who it was.

Once she was safely in the passenger seat, Cam ran to the other side and got behind the wheel, turning on the engine and pulling onto the narrow beach road.

“Where are you taking me tonight, Casanova?” Jolene asked.

Cam rolled his eyes. “Did Elsie tell you to call me that?”

“I can neither confirm nor deny that, during our little shopping outing earlier today, we discussed what I should refer to you as.” She smirked, looking across the car at Cam, noticing his face turn red as he drove through the streets of Amelia Island.

“Well, if you must know, in true Casanova fashion, I’m taking you to a place on the water on the other side of the island.”

“You make it sound like it’s so far away. The other side of the island is what? A few miles?”

Cam chuckled. “Yeah. We like our small little slice of paradise.”

“I like your small little slice of paradise, too.” Taking a deep breath, she reached across the car and grabbed Cam’s hand after he shifted into fourth.
 

His eyes went wide as he stared at his hand clutched in hers. He quickly returned his attention to the road, thinking it would be a bad first date if he got into an accident. His heart was racing, all because Jolene was touching him. It felt amazing, her delicate flesh gently caressing his.

Glancing at her, he saw a spark in her eyes. “I don’t understand,” he remarked softly. “You…”

“I’m scared of being touched. You figured that out pretty quickly. That doesn’t mean that
I
don’t want to touch
you
. I do. I’ve been wanting to touch you since the other day when you caught me ogling you in your wetsuit. I’m just hoping that you’ll be patient with me because I want you to touch me. I really do. But I don’t know how I’ll react and I really don’t want to be scared of you touching me. I’m just not ready for that yet.”

“I won’t do anything to betray your trust, Jolene,” he said quietly, secretly wanting to keep driving. He didn’t want to ever stop feeling her warmth on his body, no matter how innocent the contact was.

“I believe you, but I need to work through this in my own time.” She gave him a pleading look.

“I can help you, ya know.”

“I know, and I want you to.”

Their eyes met and Cam could see the pain behind them. But there was also a hint of the look that he had come to admire so much in the woman over the past few days…hope.

“But don’t think that I’m one of your bat-shit crazy patients,” she said quickly, trying to break the intensity that was building between them. “I don’t need a fucking strait-jacket, okay?”

“Most of my patients are completely normal,” Cam explained. “They’re just going through certain things in their life that they have trouble processing. The same goes for you.”

“I’m dealing with a whole war chest of shit I can’t come to terms with.” She withdrew her hand and crossed her arms in front of her chest as Cam pulled up along Front Street and parked the car.

“Is this the place?” Jolene asked.
 

“It would appear that way, wouldn’t it?”

She punched him playfully. “You know, it would behoove you to not be so sarcastic to me, especially if you’re trying to woo me.” She opened the door and began walking along the marina toward a large restaurant set on the water.

Cam laughed to himself at her words. “Wait up there, Tomorrow!” he shouted after her, running to catch up. “Whoever said I was trying to woo you?” he asked, flashing his perfect white teeth.

Jolene turned to look at him. “Oh, you are. You can try to deny it all you want, but you like me. And that is perfectly fine with me.” She reached for the door of the restaurant and was about to swing it open when Cam placed his palm on it, forcing it closed. He hovered over her, his gorgeous eyes searing her entire body as he stared at her. The look he was giving her made her blood spike, desire flooding through her veins. He was barely a breath away, but she wished that he was even closer.

“And why is that, Jolene?” he asked quietly.

Her mind went blank. “What?” she responded breathlessly.

“Why are you okay with me liking you?” He leaned in closer, his lips almost touching hers. He was more than aware that he was pushing his limits with her, but that always seemed to work with his patients. He hoped it would work with Jolene, too.

“Because.” Her voice was barely above a whisper. Keeping her eyes trained on Cam’s, she was certain that she was about to fall to the ground, completely weak in the knees from his tender gaze.

“Because why?”

It was taking all of her resolve to not close the gap between their mouths. She wanted his lips on her. She wanted that more than anything she could remember in recent history. “Because… I like you, too,” she responded quietly.

“Thought so,” he said, abruptly turning and opening the door to the restaurant.

She steadied herself, trying to maintain her composure when she felt anything but composed. No man had ever had that effect on her before, and she had no idea what to make of it.

After the hostess sat them at a table overlooking the harbor, he placed his order with the waiter for a bottle of wine. Once he walked away, Cam said, “The sunsets here are amazing.”

Jolene glanced out the window, watching the shrimp boats coming in to dock for the evening. “The view is breathtaking,” she commented.

“Wait until you see it. This is just the beginning,” he said with a big grin on his face. “It’s the best place on the island to catch the sunset. Of course, you already know the best place to watch the sunrise.”

“Oh yeah? Where’s that?”

“Your front deck.” His voice was quiet and thoughtful, his eyes engrossed as they took in Jolene’s reaction to his words. “But
my
favorite place is actually out on the water, riding the waves in.”

“But you can’t even see the sun when you’re riding in to shore.” She furrowed her brow in confusion.

“Yeah, but I can see
your
face as you watch the sunrise, and that look… Well, it’s my favorite expression of yours.” His eyes grew heated.

“Don’t get me wrong,” he said quickly. “I love all your looks. Your cute look. Your thinking look. Your dreamy look. Your pissed off look. Your sad look. All of them are beautiful.” He smiled at her, hoping that his words weren’t scaring her. “But the most spectacular view on this island is when you’re watching the sun appear over the horizon for the first time. It’s as if, with the rising of each sun, there’s hope. And that’s what that look is. It’s your hopeful look. It’s my favorite by far because it makes me feel hope…for us.”

Jolene’s jaw dropped, wondering how someone who seemed to despise her just a week ago could have been paying that much attention to her. With every sentence he uttered, she felt her defenses weakening even more and it didn’t scare her. She didn’t know why, but something about the genuineness behind his words and actions made her believe him. She was convinced he would never do anything to hurt her, at least not intentionally.

The waiter returned with their wine, breaking the growing tension at the table.

“Normally I’m more of a fan of red wine, but with it being summer and all, I figured a nice crisp Sauvignon Blanc would be refreshing.”

Jolene nodded, watching as the waiter poured the pale liquid into the two wine glasses in front of them. After he left, she grabbed the glass, raising it in front of her.

“To you,” she said. “For your patience. For making me believe again…believe that there is good in this world. And for giving me hope.” A tear fell down her face as she brought the glass to her lips.

Cam reached across the table, stopping short of her hand. “Please don’t cry, Jolene,” he begged.

“It’s not a sad cry,” she said, lowering her wine glass. “It’s a happy cry. A hopeful cry.”

“Good. I’m glad that I give you hope. That’s all I want. Please don’t feel pressured. I’ll take whatever you can give…” He trailed off, stopping short.

“Are you okay?” Jolene asked, noticing Cam’s expression go blank.

“You know what? I won’t take whatever you can give me, Jolene,” he said fervently. “I’ve made that speech to quite a few girls in the past, and I’m not going to do it again. Here’s the thing.” He looked down before returning his eyes to hers, the fire behind them practically melting her.

“I want you. I know you have your issues, but I will do all that I can to make sure that you’re able to move past them…with me. I know it sounds crazy and that we’ve only known each other for a short period of time, but there’s something about you that I’m drawn to. I can’t explain it and I’m not even going to try to understand it. All I
do
understand is that I want you in my life, Jolene. God, I want that more than anything I can remember wanting in recent history.”

Jolene could feel her heart thumping in her chest as she listened to Cam’s passionate plea.

“I want to wake up every morning and look at your smiling face as you watch the sunrise. I want my heart to skip a beat every time I catch you checking me out. I love that. I don’t want you to ever stop doing that because I’ll tell you a secret. I’ve been checking out your body since the day we met and you walked away from me calling me a prick or an ass or whatever colorful words you chose to use. God, Jolene,” he hissed under his breath, his chest heaving. “The way you sway your hips.” He lowered his voice, his eyes becoming dark with desire. “It makes me fucking crazy. And don’t even get me started on your legs.”

Cam took a deep breath, not wanting to frighten her with his forwardness. He noticed her chest rise and fall in a more uneven pattern. Her face was flush, her expression intense. She didn’t look scared at all. She actually looked rather turned on.

“I will be patient,” he said. “But I want to feel those legs wrapped around me more than you can possibly imagine.”

Jolene stared deep into his eyes and could see the sincerity behind them. She quickly closed the gap between her hand and Cam’s, clutching on to it, softly caressing his knuckles. She wanted to feel his skin against hers, but on her terms.

“I want that, too. But it’s going to take me some time.”

“I know. I get it,” he assured her. “I will always respect your boundaries, no matter how difficult it may be at times. Just know that, anytime you want to touch me, I’m game.” He winked.

~~~~~~~~~~

D
AVID
WATCHED
AS
THE
tall, attractive man climbed the stairs of Jolene’s deck and knocked on her front door. It was taking every last ounce of self-control he had to not walk up to him and do some serious damage. He almost made a scene at the bar when he and everyone else heard him ask Jolene out on a date. He hated having to simply stand aside as she agreed to go out with him, but he had to. It was all part of the plan.

The front door opened and his breath caught when he saw Jolene emerge from the house, her black dress making her skin glow. He couldn’t wait to taste that skin again. He was becoming impatient and wanted to solidify his arrangement with her as soon as humanly possible.

Tonight
, he kept saying over and over again as he followed Jolene and her date through the streets of Amelia Island. He felt his dick get hard when her eyes, wide with fear, flashed through his memory. Over the past several days that he had been watching her, craving her, aching for her, he slowly saw the fear leave her. She held her head high and looked people in the eyes. He didn’t want that. He needed to put the fear back in her. It was time.

“D
O
YOU
WANT
TO
come in?” Jolene asked, turning to Cam as he walked her to the door after dinner.

He hesitated. “As great as that sounds, we need to take this slow. One day at a time.”

“You really are one of the good guys, aren’t you?” She turned her back to him and unlocked the front door.

“I try to be,” he responded softly, taking a few steps and standing behind her.

Jolene stilled, sensing his warm body just a breath away. She wondered what it would feel like to have his fingers caress her skin. Her heart racing, she swept her hair to the side, leaving her neck completely exposed.