Heart (30 page)

“And you still think I could destroy
everything? You think I would honestly enslave humanity?”

He took an aggressive step forward. “Look at
the women Nix employs. Look at the kind of young girls he produces.
Look at your mother. I had no evidence that someone worthy could
live through Nix’s… Nix’s… methods.”

My lungs deflated, all of the air whooshed
from inside of me and I felt strangled and choking. Thinking back
on my childhood, on the sick things I had seen, the evil that
existed around me… Could I blame Smith? Or my mother?

“What if he would have gotten to her?” I
threw my arm in Honor’s direction. She had pulled her knees to her
chest and watched us with concerned anguish. “What if he would have
taken her from you? Then there would be two of us!”

“No,” Smith denied immediately. “I would
never have let that happen. And Ava took the same oath. We would
have done whatever it took to keep Honor with us, out of Nix’s
clutches.”

There was a large part of me that resented
him for saying that. As thankful as I was that Honor had a
different life than me, that she had been protected and sheltered
from the very real monsters I lived with daily, I couldn’t help but
feel sorry for myself. Why hadn’t anyone taken an oath like that
for me? Why had I been thrown to the wolves?

Seeming to read my mind, Smith exhaled and
said, “It was too late for you, Ivy. As much as it pains me to say,
Nix has watched you from the moment you were born. You were always
his. I think he could sense the difference in you, even before the
Fates got involved. There’s more that you don’t understand. Nix has
never been interested in your sister like he has been with you.
Honor might rival you with power, but she will never be you. Part
of her is her mother, yes, but the other part is me. My powers work
in opposition of Ava’s. While she will be incredible one day, she
will never have that… twist of obsession that you do. Your father,
Pontus, was a sea god. His power is the perfect complement to the
Siren inside of you. You never had a choice.”

My self-pity kicked me in the chest, but I
refused to give into it. I didn’t have a choice of who I was, but I
had a choice now.

Ryder’s arms tightened around me, but I
pulled back. I didn’t need to be weak now. I didn’t need to wallow
or feel sorry for myself. I needed to get my shit together and
murder the son of a bitch that wanted to use my power for the worst
kind of evil.

I needed to figure out a way to kill Nix.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Ancient power hummed in my veins while
purpose settled in my spirit. The puzzle of my life was almost put
together. I had been searching for pieces for as long as I could
remember.

I never understood why Nix had been so
obsessed with me or what he planned to do with me. Now I knew. I
had never understood my mother’s neglect or the cruel way she
treated me. She had revealed most of her reasoning a year ago, but
now I understood it all. I had never understood why Smith was so
determined to help me or why he was willing to risk so much. Now I
knew.

Most of all, I had never understood my power
and what I was capable of besides making men mindless. But now I
knew.

I controlled them. I forced them to worship
me or who I chose for them. I had the blood of a primordial sea god
pumping through my body and beating in my chest. I had the lethal
charm of a powerful Siren. I was unstoppable.

I was Queen of the Nesoi.

“So what’s going to happen?” I asked Smith.
“With the murder and Nix? What are we going to do?”

He finally sat down. His legs seemed to
collapse beneath him as if he couldn’t find the energy to stand
anymore.

This had been my battle for not quite
eighteen years.

This had been Smith’s…
Zeus’
battle
for as long as there had been time.

“You’ll have to stand before Hera and I
tomorrow morning,” he explained. “Where I will probably pardon
you.”

“Probably?” Ryder raised his eyebrows.

A small smile played along Smith’s masculine
lips. “Obviously. You’ll be let off with a technicality, of course.
You didn’t actually kill Hades, Persephone did. I’ll remind my wife
and the rest gathered that you are not capable of killing a god
because neither of you are gods. Which isn’t entirely true in Ivy’s
case, but at the very least you don’t have access to your godhood
until you’re twenty-one. So that should be a nonissue.”

I sat down next to Honor. She curled up into
my side when I threw my arm around her thin shoulders. Ryder sat
down next to me and for the first time in my life I felt like I
belonged somewhere… I felt like I had a family.

The feeling was so profound and unprecedented
that while Smith continued to talk, my entire world shifted on its
axis and evolved into something new.

“Are you listening?” Smith asked
patiently.

I lifted my gaze from the spot on the marble
floor I’d been fixated on and met his piercing brown ones. “Yes,” I
whispered. “You’ll pardon us.”

“But I’ll ask you to leave,” he continued.
“It would only be proper for you to take your absence after a god
is dead.”

“Nix will follow me.”

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his
knees. “My brothers and sisters will be required to stay during the
time of mourning. I’ll drag out the funeral proceedings as long as
I can. I’ll need to appoint a new god of the Underworld. I’ll be
able to stretch that a few days, although everyone will expect me
to pick Thanatos. In the meantime, get to your island. Nix can’t
reach you there.”

“But how? There’s not exactly a direct flight
from here to there.”

“You can take yourself,” Hermes said. “You
can always move between Olympus and your home.”

I looked at him helplessly, “I’ve never done
it before! I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“Take them, Hermes,” Smith commanded. “Drop
them off and then come back. No one will miss you for the few
minutes you’ll be gone.”

Hermes didn’t look convinced, but he nodded
his consent.

“Ivy,” Smith said sternly, “This time, when
you get to your island, stay there.”

“I had planned on it the first time!”

“I know you had good intentions and believe
me when I say that I want Poseidon dealt with more than anyone
else, but if he manages to… harness your power, we will all pay the
price. I’ll take care of him. You can trust me.”

I held his gaze for as long as I could, but I
was the one that looked away first. I glanced at Hermes, hoping to
gauge his reaction, since he was the one that came for me, but his
face was turned away from me.

Unease trickled down my spine and I knew
immediately that Hermes did not agree.

“The gigantes are with Poseidon, your
majesty,” Hermes reminded him in a meek voice. “He’s planning
war.”

“Maybe before I returned, he thought he could
unseat Hera. But he won’t dare attack the mountain now that I’ve
come back.” Smith sounded so confident, so completely assured that
I wanted to believe him.

But I couldn’t.

He knew Nix. He knew that Nix would stop at
nothing to get to me or use my power for his own agenda.

“What about Honor?” I asked softly.

“She will stay with me,” Smith said evenly.
“In time, I’ll send her to visit you, Ivy. But for now, she will
always stay at my side. Poseidon isn’t the only one of my brothers
I need to watch when it comes to her.”

“Does Hera know about her yet?” I felt guilty
asking in front of her, but I wanted the whole story and I had a
strong feeling Smith would hold back whatever he could.

“Not yet,” he replied. “I’ll tell her
tonight.”

“She won’t be upset that… you know… with my
mom?” Wow. I never wanted to ask that question again.

He smiled indulgently, “My marriage has
always been strictly business.” He rose to his feet and held his
hand out to Honor. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, we’ll head home.”

Honor threw her arms around my neck and we
hugged tightly. I didn’t want to let her go. I didn’t want her to
have anything to do with this mountain or these people. Smith had
done such an amazing job taking care of her until now, why couldn’t
he have found a safer place for her to hang out until everything
settled down?

“I’ll find you before I go,” I promised her.
“We’ll say goodbye tomorrow.”

She nodded against my neck, sniffling back
tears. “Okay.”

“Love you, little girl.” The words were
blissful and sublime on my lips. A month ago, I had thought I’d
never get to say that to her again.

“I love you too.”

She stepped back, took her dad’s hand and
left the house. I felt her absence physically. I wanted to run
after her and lock her up with me. I wanted to make Hermes take us
now
. I wanted him to flash us… or
apparate
us… or
whatever the hell it was called out of here this second!

“You okay?” Ryder’s hands moved over my
shoulders, down my arms until they gripped my hands.

“No,” I told him honestly.

He stared at me with those gunmetal gray eyes
of his and I felt my soul calm down and my nerves smooth out. I
felt myself come back together. I felt oxygen refill my lungs and
my heartbeat even out.

I felt grounded and centered and alive
again.

I felt hope.

“I have things to do,” Hermes called from
somewhere else. “Help yourself to the house, but I wouldn’t
recommend leaving it. There’s food in the kitchens and new clothes
in your rooms. I’ll be back later…”

“Thanks, Hermes,” Ryder mumbled, but we
barely noticed him leave.

“Hungry?” I asked him.

His eyes darkened. “I am.”

I swallowed nervously. “Should we find the
kitchen?”

“Let’s get cleaned up first,” he suggested.
“I can’t take myself seriously in this dress.”

I laughed at his bedraggled appearance,
knowing I didn’t look any better. “I bet the closets here are
filled with more of them.”

He frowned. “Tomorrow morning can’t come soon
enough.”

My smile wavered. He was so right about
that.

He took my hand and led me toward the
bedrooms. The closets had been filled with modern clothing and the
bathrooms stocked with amenities. We planned to sleep in the same
room, but separated ways long enough to take quick showers and
redress.

The attached bathroom was incredibly
luxurious, but it was hard for me to appreciate the multiple
showerheads and silky, warm water after everything we went through.
I just wanted to get home. I just wanted to leave this mountain
behind me forever.

Thankfully, Hermes had given me a few options
of normal clothes. I put on black yoga pants and a loose gray tank
top, combed through my hair with my fingers and called it good. The
bathroom had been stocked with every kind of facial cream and
makeup product imaginable, but I didn’t need that stuff with Ryder.
I would save the cosmetics for the morning.

I met Ryder in the hall. He leaned against
the wall casually, but I saw the tension in his shoulders, the
alertness in his eyes that roamed the corridor. He didn’t trust
Hermes or his home, any more than he trusted Nix.

He relaxed some when I stepped out of my
bedroom. I took in his lean, muscled body as he moved toward me,
his wild hair that was still wet and tangled, the jeans and t-shirt
he’d found… he was breathtaking. He was more beautiful than any
Greek god or supernatural creature.

Maybe it was his lack of immortality that
drew me to him or maybe it was something that called to me from
inside him… something pure and wholesome, something that hadn’t
been depraved for as long as time. Whatever it was, it called to
me. He called to me.

I loved him in philosophical ways that made
me a better person, that made me want to make the world a better
place. I loved him more than I loved myself. I loved him more than
I wanted to save myself.

“Better?” he asked gently.

I took a deep breath, “Infinitely.”

He held out his hand and I took it
immediately. We walked toward the kitchen where we found a light
dinner of something like hummus, olives and flatbread. It wasn’t
much, but I wasn’t super hungry anyway. I was too anxious for the
morning to want anything in my riotous stomach.

After our meal, we wandered outside to a
balcony off the kitchen. The house was silent inside, but I knew
there were people in there somewhere moving about, taking care of
all of Hermes’ needs. Outside felt even more isolated.

A million stars glittered overhead and the
darkened countryside stretched on forever. There were lights in the
distance that I concluded were other estates, but they were spaced
far enough way that I knew not even gods could see or hear us.

We settled into lounging chairs and stared up
at the sky. I looked at the constellations that were so clear from
this vantage and wondered which had been named after the people on
this mountain. I had never been interested in astronomy before, but
now I couldn’t help but be curious.

The Greek Pantheon had been revered for as
long as it had existed, but now I saw it for what it was. It was
not the source of life and power that ancient Greeks believed it to
be. It was not the stuff of legends modern history books told or
the superheroes made into books and movies.

These gods had taken their immortality and
squandered it. They were no better than humans, even with their
unlimited power and endless lives. No, they were worse.

They could have done incredible things
throughout history. They could have maintained their patronages if
they had been worthy of worship... if they had been worthy of
humanity.

Compelled by something stupid and selfless, I
said, “Don’t feel like you have to stay with me on the island. I
won’t be able to leave, but that doesn’t mean you can’t. You could
go home or to college or… whatever.”