Healed by Fire (16 page)

I always screwed things up. I hurt Ares. I
hurt Achilles. I even hurt Koda. All I wanted was to please them
and I failed miserably at it. The anger and pain I felt grew
unbearable. Tears streamed down my face and pain gripped my body. I
closed my eyes and pictured each of their faces and the times that
I’d hurt them. I took another deep breath and then screamed as I
shot fire up into the air. The force of the power I was using, the
pain I was feeling and the sadness sent me to my knees. I sobbed
uncontrollably as I released it all and screamed and cried.

I reigned in the power and dropped my hands
to the ground, continuing to sob. Warm arms wrapped around me and
pulled me against an even warmer body. “It’s alright, Darlin’. It’s
going to be alright,” whispered Koda.

I buried my face into his chest and snuggled
into him as I continued to cry. “I’m always failing. I fail at
being a woman. I fail at being a mate. I fail at being a pack mate.
I fail at all of the relationships around me. How can anyone think
that I won’t fail at this prophecy that supposedly surrounds
me?”

Ares squatted down in front of me. “What
happened, Artemis? What made you feel this way?”

I turned away from him and whispered, “I’ve
hurt you all. I’ve hurt all three of you. All I want to do is love
you and make you happy and I can’t even do that.”

“You do make us happy. The sight of your
face makes us happier than we have been in a hundred years,”
whispered Koda.

I shook my head. “I’m continually causing
you pain by a wrong word or a wrong decision. I can’t seem to do
anything right.”

“Life is all about learning from your
mistakes. You think I’m perfect? You sure as hell know Ares isn’t
perfect,” Koda said as he rubbed my back slowly.

“Hey,” Ares protested. He reached forward
and touched my arm. “We all make mistakes. The defining factor is
how you handle the mistakes and what you do to try not to make them
again.”

“How can I not make a mistake when the
choice will hurt one person no matter what?” I whispered.

“This is about Achilles, isn’t it?” Ares
asked. I didn’t respond which was answer enough for him. “I know
it’s hard and I wish there was a way I could fix it for you, but I
can’t. I’d be lying if I told you it wouldn’t bother me if you
mated with him and I won’t lie to you.”

“What’s going on?” Achilles asked with pain
still evident in his voice.
Why hadn’t I felt him approach or
even heard him approach? It was odd that I hadn’t been able to at
least feel him when he was so close.

I stood up and brushed myself off.
“Nothing.” I walked away from them all and towards Erebos who was
sparing with Theseus. “Greetings, Erebos,” I said as I smiled at
him.

He smiled at me. “Greetings, Artemis. How
may I help you this day?”

“Could you teach me some advanced magic
techniques?” I asked.

Erebos blinked twice in surprise and then
said, “I’m not sure that I can teach you anything. You know quite a
bit more than me actually.”

“I know witch magic and the magic I picked
up, but I don’t know much Sidhe magic,” I answered.

He rubbed his chin a moment and then said,
“Well, I could teach you a few of my special talents and some of
the nature magic. It might be better if we had a few Sidhe who each
possessed different abilities.”

“Whatever you think is best.”

He smiled. “I’ll round up some Sidhe and
meet you back here after lunch. Is that okay?”

“Thank you.” I said with a smile.

Theseus touched my arm gently as I went to
turn around. “Are you alright?” he asked softly.

I patted his hand reassuringly. “I’ll be
fine. Eventually.”

He wanted to say something else, I could
tell, but I walked away before he could. I could feel Ares,
Achilles and Koda watching me, but I ignored them. I needed to be
away from them for a while. I walked to a halfbreed and a full
werewolf sparring with each other. “Mind if I join?” I asked
them.

They turned and bowed to me. “Princess,”
they said at the same time.

I waved my hand dismissively at them. “Call
me Artemis. We’re pack members so there’s no reason we can’t be on
a first name basis.”

The male werewolf on the left was quite
possibly the tallest man I’d ever met. His body was corded with
muscle and if I hadn’t heard him speak just now I would have
thought he could only scream at people. He did have bright green
eyes that showed intelligence though and he looked older than the
most of the others. “I’m Thor.”

I swallowed my laugh and asked, “And how old
are you, Thor?”

He frowned a moment in concentration and
then turned to Ares who was standing across the field watching us.
“How long ago did we meet?”

Ares looked down at the ground as he
thought. “We met around eight hundred Anno Domini I believe.”

Thor nodded his head, turning back to me.
“So then I am around seventeen hundred years old.” He frowned a
moment and then nodded again. “Yes, that sounds about right.”

I turned and looked at Ares, wanting to ask
how old he was since he was older than Thor, but then remembered I
was trying to ignore them. I turned back to Thor. “Well, then I
shouldn’t be a problem against you.” I looked up his massive frame.
“Not that I thought I could beat you physically anyways.”

The halfbreed was a woman who looked no
older than twenty, but the looks she gave me made me think she was
much wiser than me. “What’s your name?” I asked.

She smiled. “I’m Daisy Mae,” she said with a
thick Southern accent. “It’s a pleasure meeting you.”

I shook her extended hand and smiled sweetly
at her. “I love your accent. It’s a pleasure meeting you too.”

“Why aren’t you just the sweetest thing
ever?! How old are you?” she asked.

“I’m one hundred and eighteen,” I replied.
“And how old are you?”

“Only twenty nine,” she said with the
sweetest smile on her face. “I’m one of Koda’s daughters.”

I stepped forward and hugged her. “Well then
this is a more appropriate way to greet you.”

She laughed and squeezed me tight before
letting me step back. “I’ve heard so much about you. I am so happy
I finally got to meet and talk with you.”

I didn’t want to be rude, but I wasn’t
exactly in the mood to socialize. “It’s a pleasure to meet you,
Daisy Mae.” I turned to Thor. “So, how about that fight?”

Thor sized me up, looking from the top of my
head to my toes. “You sure?”

I smiled, but it came out more as a baring
of teeth. “Yes.”

He smiled at me, apparently pleased at my
reaction. “What are the ground rules?”

“No half-shifts, I don’t need you bigger
than you already are. Magic is permitted, but no lethal kinds. This
is just a match for fun and to hone my skills.”

Thor smiled wide, his teeth lengthening as
he did. “Sounds fun. How about we start in full shift?”

I stripped my shirt off over my head and
tossed it to Daisy Mae. “Sounds good.” I pulled my bra, pants and
panties off and gave them to Daisy Mae too and then dropped to my
hands and knees as I shifted. The shift was smooth and pain free,
but moving into my wolf form brought forth the feelings I’d
suppressed. I clenched my teeth together as I fought the rage that
tried to surface.

Thor yipped at me and I turned to face him.
He was almost as big as Ares, but still slightly shorter. A fight
between the two of them could be catastrophic. I wagged my tail to
show him I was fine and then crouched down and began circling
him.

He circled with me with slow, graceful
movements. I had no idea how an animal as big as he, could be
graceful while I was such a klutz. He sprang at me and I rolled to
the right, spinning around and snapping at his flank, but he dodged
before I could get him.

He was good. Fast and agile. I was
incredibly outmatched. If this had been a real battle a smart wolf
would roll on her back and beg for mercy. This wasn’t a real battle
though and I wasn’t particularly that smart. I charged forward,
straight for his face and then slid underneath him, snapping my
jaws around his forepaw. He yipped in pain and then spun around to
attack me. I backed out from under his body, releasing his leg and
danced around him.

You’re good, but you’re too slow.
He
said to me.

I lifted my lips in a snarl and smile.
Then why haven’t you caught me yet?

He lunged forward, his teeth flashing just
to the right of my neck as I darted under his front legs and out
the side. I knew he wasn’t trying his hardest and it was only a
matter of time before he caught me, but I would make him work to
catch me.

He darted forward and I barely had time to
run away. I ran around him and bit his tail. He growled angrily and
before I could get away, jumped on top of me, pinning me to the
ground.

This is cheating!
I yelled
indignantly.
A real wolf would never fight like this!

Ah, but we are not real wolves, are
we?
I struggled underneath him, trying to get away, but he held
me down.
Do you give up?

NEVER!
I yelled just before I
whined.

“Step off of my mate, Thor,” Ares said in a
menacing tone from nearby. I couldn’t see him since Thor was
pinning my head to the ground with his neck.

I growled at Ares to butt out, but Thor
stood up off of me.
You don’t have to listen to him.

Thor shook his head.
He is beta. I have
to listen to him.

I exhaled.
Sorry.

Thor nudged my shoulder with his nose.
Did I hurt you?

No. Just irritated that he stepped in when
you weren’t hurting me.

It’s his place to protect you. He heard you
whine and therefore thought I might be hurting you. He knows I
would never purposefully harm you, but accidents do happen. What
would you like to do now?

I shifted forms and took my clothes from
Daisy Mae. “I think I’ll go take a bath. Thank you for sparring
with me. I look forward to sparring with you further in human form
soon.”

Thor bowed his wolf head and trotted over to
his clothes.

“Are you hurt?” Ares asked from behind
me.

I finished zipping my pants up and walked
away, ignoring him. I shouldn’t be mad at Ares, but I just wanted
some time without them hovering over me. I couldn’t even play fight
with a member of the pack without him intervening.

My body was surprisingly sore so instead of
walking I teleported from the training grounds into Achilles’ room.
The room was thankfully empty and the wall where the vampires had
attacked years before was blessedly fixed. I stripped my clothes
off and started the water for the bathtub.

I was standing outside of the tub watching
it fill up when I felt him behind me. “You know I can sense you so
why bother sneaking up?”

“I’m concerned for you and I wasn’t
sneaking, I was just being quiet,” Ares answered.

I stayed in my position, not facing him even
though I needed his touch. I needed a bath and time to process my
feelings as well though.

“Achilles told me what happened,” he said
softly.

There had been no inflection in his voice.
So either he was hiding what he was feeling or he wanted me to ask.
Do I give in and ask or do I stand here silently?

I blew out air through my nose and gave in.
It wasn’t Ares’ fault I was in a predicament. “And?”

“I understand why you’re so upset now. It
must have taken a lot to refuse him once you got that far. What
made you do it?”

“You,” I whispered as tears leaked out of my
eyes silently. “I couldn’t bear the thought of hurting you. Yet all
I did was hurt Achilles.”

Ares stepped in front of me, blocking my
view of the tub with his chest. “I can’t make this decision for
you, Artemis. I don’t know what the right answer is or what I
should tell you to do. I love you and I’m a very jealous man. I
don’t want to share you, but at the same time I don’t like seeing
you or Achilles in pain.”

I looked up into his face and saw the anger
and pain twisting his handsome features. “You’re my mate, my
passt genau
. How can I cheat on the only man that’s ever
given me a home?”

“He is your mate and
passt genau
as
well.”

I shook my head. “He’s not my
passt
genau
. You know it and I know it and Achilles knows it. I may
be his destined mate because I released his powers, but that is
different than the connection we have. I feel Achilles in my heart
and my head, but I feel you in my bones and my soul. You may both
share my heart, but only you have my soul.”

Before I could wrap my arms around Ares, he
squashed me in a hug, bruising my lips with his intense kiss. In
two seconds my despair evaporated and the love Ares felt for me
seeped in to lift my mood. He pulled back and wiped my eyes. “I
love you, Artemis Lupine. I just wish I could fix this. I wish
there were a way to make us all happy.”

“If you let her mate with me that would
help,” Achilles said angrily from the bathroom doorway.

“How long have you been there?” I asked in
shock.
And why hadn’t I felt him arrive for the second time in
less than an hour?

“Perhaps because you were too busy with
Ares’ tongue in your mouth,” Achilles replied tautly.

I jerked at his hostility. “Achilles.”

He rubbed his face and then slammed his fist
into the wall. “I’m sorry, Artemis. This pain is eating me up. I
can’t sleep. I can’t eat. All I can think about is you and the bond
we have yet to complete.”

“It is not fair for you to lay this burden
upon her. She just returned to us!” Ares said as he pushed me
slightly behind him. He was acting protective of me from Achilles,
which was a very bad sign.

“She just returned to us and already you
have mated with her! I know I agreed not to mate with her, but I
had no idea how hard it would be,” Achilles said as he stared at
Ares.