Hazel St. James - Fighting For You (Redemption#1)[ (21 page)

As Peyton swallowed, more tears spilled from her eyes. Tristan’s conviction wavered when her lip quivered just a little, but when he stepped forward to grab her hands, she flinched and pulled back.

“Don’t lie to me, Tristan. You’re running scared.” She had poked him in the chest with her fingernail as she spoke. Tristan was a good half foot taller than Peyton, and even so, she was doing her best to remain intimidating.

“Fuck that, Peyton! Hey, if you really want to help me, you’ll leave me to do this my way. Before I can be someone that isn’t poisonous, I have to find out who I am and how to BE me. How to live and be a person and not just a bi-polar fuckup. I need to do that and I think it would be best if I did it alone.”

Peyton was the first and only person that had ever stayed with him for this long, and she had dealt with some of the worst of his rollercoaster emotions. But, it seemed as if even she had her limits on how much she could handle. Thinking of life without her was like throwing a glass of cold water into his face. Peyton was hired to be his “caretaker” until he was able to get his shit together, but she had given herself to Tristan freely. Cared for him, stayed with him, helped him, and given everything of herself to him.

“You once told me that you felt like you were always lost. I thought that by being there for you, maybe you could figure out how to be
found
. I didn’t want you to do this alone.” Peyton’s voice was quiet and her lower lip was quivering the entire time she spoke.

She sobbed, “I love you. Don’t you see that? I’ve loved you ever since you said you wanted to try. I love every broken piece there is of you,” she sobbed. Her face was red and splotchy when their eyes met, and her eyes bored directly into his soul when she said, “if you don’t want me, have the balls to say it. Don’t pussy foot around it. You don’t need me, then say it. I want to hear you say the words.”

Tristan looked at the pain and anguish written all over Peyton’s angelic face. Every tear track down her cheeks was a product of his doing. He’d put the hurt in her body. She was suffering because of him. Another person that was a casualty of his worthless life.

Peyton’s happiness depended upon his strength right now; he needed to do this…for her. The words were forming in his mouth, like acid on his tongue, “I don’t need you. You need to walk away.”

Almost as if the words cut her skin, Peyton flinched, but an eerie calm settled across her face as she said, “I hope you find what you need, Tristan.”

More coming this fall in

“Being With You”

Book Two in the Redemption Series