Haven (37 page)

His body twitched. His head turned.

“No.” I denied what my eyes saw, because his face was wrong, unfinished. Waxen skin with red lines where features should be.
It’s a mannequin
, my brain insisted,
not
a person
. But then it screamed. He screamed.
Alexander
screamed. Only
it was muffled because his mouth was welded shut, as were his eyes.

He was trapped, blinded, mutilated.

Screaming.

My cries joined his and I fell backwards into the darkness. But my real body was on the move, too, in Alexander’s very real house and when I hit the metal steps...

Jonas caught me, whisking me up to Alexander’s bedroom. He put his face close to mine. I saw his lips move, but all I heard were Alexander’s muffled screams accompanied by a high-pitched squeak, as if someone repeatedly stabbed a mouse nearby.

Jonas shook me.

Oh. I made those pitiful tortured animal sounds.

He slapped me. My cheek stung, my shrieks stopped and I heard him say, “Illusion, Carina. A mental trick. The Youngling is unharmed. Gaze upon him. See him. See the truth.”

He turned me to face the bed.

It took several seconds for me to focus on Alexander, to lose the vision of his tortured, naked body and accept the perfect, unmarred one before me. On his back, clad in black pajama pants, he appeared to be asleep but,

“You—” my voice broke. I coughed and tried again. “You call this unharmed? He looks dead. Really dead. Did you kill him?’

No, no, no. Mine.

I sank onto the bed, placing a tentative palm against Alexander’s cheek. His skin was gray, ice cube cold, his cheeks sunken, lips so blue they were almost black. My chest constricted.
No.
“Is he?”

“Of course not, my darling,” Tessa replied in that infuriating, amiable,
we’re-still-having-a-tea-party
voice. She perched on the other side of Alexander. “As you discovered, he is merely imprisoned.”

Merely. Imprisoned.

She made it sound like she’d caught a ladybug and held it with gentle hands. Nothing tender about her actions here.

“This isn’t jail, this is sick.” Anger made my voice shake.

“Disobedience has a price. He is paying it.” Tessa’s face was a pleasant mask.

Bitch
.
“Are you insane? You can’t torture a man because he likes me, because we both made a choice
you
don’t happen to like. We’re adults, two consenting
adults!”

Tessa’s placid face contorted in fury, fangs bared, black eyes flashing. “No child, he is
minion
and has defied us at every turn. He approached you when it was expressly
forbidden for
any
vampire to be in your presence. He touched you though he knew the dire consequences of physical contact between the two of you, and as a result, you almost suffocated. He took you to Roland’s establishment when commanded to bring you directly
to us, and there, you were nearly
killed by Dixon. And lastly
,
he performed the binding ritual after we commanded him to wait, to have us present to protect you. And once again, you almost died.”

I opened my mouth to protest, but she raised a hand. “No. He has repeatedly overstepped the boundaries of his station and put you in harm’s way. His punishment this night was necessary and hardly
harsh enough. Were he not your Key, he would be truly
dead right now. Were it not for
you
, I would draw the last spark of life from his flesh and reduce him to dust. He has paid but a small price for his transgressions. Thanks only
to
you
.”

As I stared at the vindictive monster formerly
known as my surrogate mother, something snapped inside me and I hissed. I freakin’ hissed at her, baring fangs I didn’t have and only
Jonas’s grip on my shoulders kept me from leaping over Alexander, taking her to ground and ripping open her throat with my non-fangs.

Tessa’s eyes widened in surprise at my reaction and—was that pride? I was hissing like a feral cat and she was pleased? The still sane, human part of me wanted to scream in frustration while my vampire half wanted to tear her apart
.

Thomas appeared next to Tessa. “Enough.” He drew her to her feet, gave her a pointed look. She nodded, frowned and shook her head.

Right. A private conversation. Whatever
.
I wanted no part of their telepathic tête-à-tête and barricaded my mind with a wall—huge, black, infinite—and commanded, in my best
don’t-mess-with-me-or-I-will-kill-you
voice, “Fix him. Fix him now and get out.”

Jonas released me. The other two vampires stared. I ran a silent ten count.
Uno, due, tre.
If they didn’t act soon,
quattro, cinque, sei.
I’d stop fighting my vampire nature,
sette, otto, nove.
And let it out to play. Violently.

When I hit ten, Stella appeared in the air above the railing, a shopping bag in each hand. She hovered for a second then landed at the foot of the bed. Impressive. Distracting.

She dropped the bags. “Your things. For when he awakens.”

Well, that was thoughtful. My tension-level ratcheted down a notch. “Thanks.”

She dropped out of sight. Below, she ordered Primo to prepare a carafe of blood.

“Fix him, Tessa.” I clutched Alexander’s limp hand. “Please.” My tone was almost civil. It pleased both vampires. They relaxed.

“We apologize, Carina,” Thomas said.

“For what, exactly?”

“Perhaps we have been a bit heavy-handed with you this evening.”

“Oh, ya think?”

“Yes. In future, we will approach your training from a less confrontational position.”

“Well, I’d appreciate it if you’d dial down your whole trial-by-fire testing methods, but, more importantly, can you promise not to torture and murder my boyfriend ever again? It really is a deal-breaker for me.”

“We apologize for your treatment this evening, Carina,” Tessa interjected. “But not for the proper and due punishment of my minion.”

“You’re saying you would do it again?” I frowned, rubbing a hand over my face in frustration.

“Disobedience will never be tolerated.”

I bristled. “God, Tessa, can’t you try to meet me halfway? I know you’re his master.”

“Mistress.”

“
Mistress
, and I get he ignored his marching orders. But try to see this from my perspective. How would you feel if someone did this to Thomas and made you witness it, knowing you couldn’t help him?” I squeezed Alexander’s lifeless hand. “So, if there ever is a next time, and dear God I hope there isn’t, please, can we find a different price to pay that doesn’t involve what I’ve witnessed here today?”

Tessa tilted her head. “I will take it under consideration.”

“
Grazie.”
Best outcome I’d get for the moment. And I didn’t want to push it. Waking up Alexander was priority number one.

She sank gracefully
to the bed. “As you see, I’ve exacted my price for the Youngling’s transgressions. He may return to you now.” She placed her palm on his chest. The skin under it whitened, the pallor pushing out the gray, spreading across his chest, to his face, arms, the hand I held. The blackened fingernails, his darkened lips, all white.

It was an improvement. “He’s still so cold.”

“Of course.” Tessa pricked her index finger with a fang. A large droplet pooled on the tip. She opened Alexander’s mouth, let the blood drip inside. “By my blood, you are restored.”

Alexander’s body jerked. Color flooded his skin.

Relief hit me. “Alexander?”

No reply. Though his appearance improved, there was still no one home.

“Tessa?”
Don’t panic.

“Worry not. There remains one more piece to the puzzle.”

“Okay, what piece?” I stroked Alexander’s hand. Though no longer ice cube cold, it was far from toasty.

“The shell has been restored, but his essence remains locked inside until summoned.”

“So, summon him already!” My voice burned with anger. I was beyond sick of their games.

“Perhaps, you would prefer to awaken him yourself?”

“What?”

“You heard me, darling.”

“I heard you, but I don’t understand. I’m not his master, I mean mistress. And you’ve made it painfully clear you own his ass—”

“Language!”

I shrugged. “Sorry, but how can I wake him up?”

“You are bound, one to the other.”

Oh. That.

“I release him to you.”

“You’ve unlocked the door, and now I just have to open it?” My voice betrayed my doubt.

“Precisely.”

“Right.” I gazed at my still mostly-dead boyfriend. Performance anxiety struck. I rubbed my hands together, palms sweaty. “How exactly do I do this?”

“How did you find him earlier?”

“Well, I grounded myself, pictured my power like an octopus.” I bit my lip. Wow, did that ever sound stupid.

Jonas snorted. “You think too much.”

My shoulders tensed at his words. “If you can’t say anything helpful...”

“It is helpful, darling. Try not to think of power as something other, something separate. It is as much you as every cell of your body. It is intrinsic.”

“As the heart beats, as the lungs breathe,” Thomas added, voice soft.

“Easy.” That from Jonas.

I shook my head. “I hear your words, but it doesn’t feel like that to me.”

“That’s your human side, your rational mind wanting to control all,” Thomas explained.

“Just let go,” Jonas urged.

“Wow, did you and Adrian practice that one?” I countered, irritable. “Yeah, I’m a control freak, already been there, admitted that. Not helping here.”

“
Cara mia
,” Thomas soothed. “Stop thinking. Stop worrying. Stop fighting. Simply look upon your lover and let flow what comes naturally between you.”

If ever there was a time to get out of my own way... “Okay.” My eyes locked on the prize.

With his color back, Alexander resembled a handsome, sleeping statue. Unacceptable. I wanted him to open his eyes, rob my brain of speech, make my heart race and the blood rush to my face. I wanted his arms around me, his lips against mine, his chest rubbing my breasts, while his erection pushed—

I shook my head. Work now, lust later. I stroked his face. “Why did you kill him, Tessa? Why did you make him a vampire?”

“A story for another evening, darling. Know that I make few, and still fewer among them are men. For all those I make, there is always good and just cause.”

“But, it’s murder. You murdered him.” It was a statement, not an attack. I just wanted to understand.

“No dear. He was already dead.”

I smoothed the hair from his forehead. “What do you mean?”

“He was dying. I gave him a choice.”

“Just like Stella.” My fingers drifted over his lips.

“Oh no, child. His situation was nothing at all like that of my Stellina.”

“I meant the already dying part.”

“That much is true, yes.”

My hand stopped on his shoulder. “But you’re not going to tell me the rest, are you?”

“As I have said, a story for another evening. I do believe the Youngling would prefer to tell it.”

“Okay.” Good point. It was his life, or afterlife, or whatever.

“And now, back to the matter in your hands.” Tessa joined Jonas and Thomas at the foot of the bed.

“Can we have a little privacy, please?” I felt like a teenager on a date with three too many chaperones.

Jonas disappeared in a blur down the stairs. Thomas swept Tessa off her feet and leapt over the railing.

I surveyed Alexander’s long, muscular body. “I can do this.” I cupped his face. “Wake up, Alexander.”

No reaction.

“Get out of my way, stop thinking, let go,” I muttered. “Aw, hell.” I kissed him. A total fairy tale move, but maybe it would work.

He twitched. Sucked in a deep breath. In a flash, his arms banded around me, pulled me on top of him, his lips crushing mine. My mouth opened to his demand, let his tongue push inside. He growled his approval and rolled us, pressing me into the bed, one powerful thigh slipping between my legs, rubbing against my core.

Heat rushed through me. My hips arched. “Yes.”
Yes. More.

But he stiffened and pulled back at the sound of my voice. He’d acted on instinct, but reality sunk in and awareness flooded his face. His eyes blackened and his fangs grew long and sharp. He roared and jerked upright, pawing at his face and torso.

I managed to snag his arm. “Alexander. It was a dream. It wasn’t real. This is. I’m here and you’re okay. It’s over. You’re okay.” I repeated it like a mantra a few times before he stopped twitching and snarling. I cupped his neck and coaxed him down. He settled between my legs with a soft growl.

My gaze captured his. Theoretically, I knew I couldn’t glamour him, but I tried anyway. No one should have to relive that kind of torture. “You’re here in your room, in your house, with me. You’re safe.”

My power soothed him, too, acting without an explicit order from my brain.
Intrinsic
, the vampires had explained. They were right. It was simply all of me, comforting my traumatized boyfriend. His power answered, dancing with mine as it had last night during the bonding, though less painful.

Alexander snarled but his body relaxed even further, sitting heavy against my core.

“Good. Now breathe. Just breathe.” Alexander complied. His eyes locked with mine, reverted to smoky blue. Horror faded, replaced with awareness. Of the sexual kind.