Authors: Sugar Jamison
He looked over at her and frowned. “Are you done talking?”
“I can be if you want.”
“I want.” He went over to the fridge and took out eggs, butter and cheese. He worked quietly and efficiently. She was surprised. She thought a man like him wouldn’t know a kitchen if it jumped up and bit him in the ass.
“I know you want me to be quiet, but I can’t be quiet. Quiet makes me nervous.”
He left the stove and walked over to her. She froze as he reached behind her, his arm brushing against her bare thigh.
He grabbed the bread and stepped away from her. She noticed that his eyes touched her legs before they returned to her face. “What would you like to talk about?”
There were a million things, like why she had felt so close to him last night, or why he didn’t put a shirt on before he came downstairs or why she felt things for him that she shouldn’t feel for her ex-lover’s brother. And most important, she wanted to talk about what he was planning on doing about her and Dash, but she couldn’t blurt any of that out. “I didn’t think you could cook.”
“I can’t. I can do basics. Eggs, sandwiches, pasta.”
“Why would you ever have to cook? It seems like your staff would break their necks to serve you.”
“I keep odd hours. I don’t sleep very much. It would be wrong of me to expect them to stay up just in case I have need of something.”
“Virgil wouldn’t have cared. He once had a hotel wake up their chef at two am so he could have beef Wellington.”
A muscle in Ben’s jaw ticked. “That explains the four-thousand-dollar bill I got for dinner at the Frances Hotel.”
“Did he die in debt?” she asked carefully.
“Half a million dollars’ worth.”
“Oh.” She fell silent. Half a million bucks and now a kid. Even after Virgil was gone he was still leaving behind his mess for Ben to clean up.
He toasted four slices of bread before he assembled two sandwiches and handed one to her. She took a bite, not sure she was feeling hungry anymore, but as soon as the combination of toasty bread, fluffy eggs and melted cheese hit her mouth she moaned.
“Is it to your satisfaction?” he asked, handing her a glass of orange juice.
“Thank you.” She felt her cheeks burn. Ben stared at her for a moment. His eyes lingered on her mouth before he turned his attention to his own meal. They ate in silence for a few minutes. “Ben? Do you think I might be able to have my clothes back?”
“No. I’d prefer to keep you naked and chained to a wall.”
“Was that a joke?”
“Yes,” he answered, not smiling. “You’re going to get new ones today. Dovie will take you shopping later today. You are to get yourself and Dash whatever you need.”
“Oh. Thank you.” Ben had just confirmed once again that he was going to help, but she didn’t know for how long. “Ben?”
“Yes?”
“What exactly are your plans for me and Dash? We have to leave soon and I don’t want to disturb your life any more than we have. If you can just assure me that you’ll help me with Dash I can be out of your hair soon.”
“I don’t want you out of my hair soon. I plan to marry you.”
Chapter 4
I Really Can’t Stay.… Baby, It’s Cold Outside …
Ben almost laughed when he saw Dina’s big, beautiful hazel eyes bulge, but he didn’t because he knew he had just dropped a bomb on her. He had just dropped a bomb on himself. He never thought he would get married again, never thought he would share his life with another person after Karen died. But he couldn’t let Dash walk out of his life. Or Dina for that matter. He didn’t know what made him offer marriage. It might have been the time he spent with Dash last night. It made him remember how much he wanted to be a father. It made him realize how empty his life had become these past few years. It made him not want to go back to the way things were. He stared at Dina. She sat before him with shock and uncertainty etched on her pretty face. It could have been her too. His brother had treated her badly. Her family wasn’t a part of her life. She was just as alone as he was. She didn’t have to be. She shouldn’t have to struggle or be unsure of her son’s future. He could do that for her. He could protect her. Protect them.
He couldn’t keep Virgil alive. He couldn’t save his brother, but he could keep his son safe. He could give the boy everything and in the process gain the family he always wanted.
Marriage seemed to be the only way to do that.
“Hold up.” She hopped off the counter and poked him in the chest. “What the hell do you mean you plan to marry me? I may be a poor unwed single mother with no job, no home and no prospects, but I’m still a woman and a feminist. The least you could do is ask me. I’m going to say no, but a girl likes to be asked. You don’t even love me and let’s not mention the fact that I’ve been here less than twenty-four hours and that I am the mother of your
brother’s
son and that that is the craziest idea that anybody has ever thought of ever. Plus—”
He grabbed her hand, gently squeezing her fingers in order to stop the endless stream of words that were coming out of her mouth. “Are you finished yet?”
“Well, I don’t know. You got any other crazy-ass ideas rolling around in that head of yours?”
“Just the one and it’s not so crazy.” He motioned to the table, inviting her to sit. “Will you listen?”
“Do I have any other choice?”
“Yes. Your other choice involves me throwing you out of here in just your underwear and that T-shirt.”
She sat down and crossed her long legs, irritably jiggling her foot. “I guess we’re about to have this conversation.”
He felt the corner of his lip tug. He wanted to smile again. She made him want to smile again. He hadn’t had a reason to for a long time. “I’ve always wanted children,” he started. “But my wife, Karen, had a very hard time getting pregnant and when she did she always miscarried. We went through three of them and one stillbirth in seven years of marriage. That last time was extremely hard on her.…” He trailed off, trying to stop the painful memories that sometimes invaded his thoughts. “After she died I couldn’t bring myself to remarry. I loved her too much to try and replace her with another woman. And for a long time I thought my chances of fatherhood had died with her, but then you showed up yesterday with Dash. He needs to be supported, Dina, and I know you could do a fine job of raising him yourself, but I think every boy needs a father. I would like the chance to be his.”
“I see,” she said softly. “But why do you want to marry me? I want you to have a role in his life.”
“Having my only blood relation raised three thousand miles away is not acceptable to me. I want him to grow up here. I want to see him every day. You come with him and it would better for him if the world saw him as the product of a married couple than Virgil’s discarded offspring. I want him to have a real father.”
“I need another reason, Ben.” She looked him in the eye, searching for something he couldn’t figure out. “I-I just need more.”
“If you marry me people will stop thinking I’m a reclusive hermit. Having people think I’m the next Howard Hughes is bad for business.”
She grinned at him. “Try again.”
He looked away from her, from her pretty full lips and soft smile. “I think we could be friends. This house gets to be a lonely place sometimes. You and Dash could be my family.”
She looked so unsure. He didn’t want to push her. He knew how crazy this sounded, but she had come into his life for a reason.
“If I married you, what would you require of me?”
“To raise my son. To be my companion and accompany me places sometimes.”
“What about sex?”
“What about it?”
“Would you expect me to have it with you?”
“No,” he said, although last night for the first time in years he felt … awareness of her as a woman. It had been so long since Karen had died, so long since he had been around another woman; it was only natural for his natural urges to reappear. “I just want to be your friend.”
She said nothing.
“You don’t have to decide right now. Stay with me until Christmas. That’s twelve days. If you don’t like being here you can leave with no hard feelings.”
“And what will happen to Dash if we go?”
“I’ll send you a check each month until he comes of age.”
“And if we stay?”
“He’ll be raised as a Rowe. He’ll have everything you have ever wanted for him and more. And you too. If you stay, Dina, you’ll be my wife. You’ll never have to work or struggle again.”
She was quiet for a long moment. “I know this is going to sound crazy to you. Hell, it sounds crazy to me, but I don’t just want to be somebody’s wife. I have dreams too, you know. And surprisingly none of them involve being supported by you.”
It wasn’t what he expected to hear from her, but her words made him more curious about her than ever. “What are your dreams?”
She seemed surprised by his question. “I used to be a dancer. I was good at it. I really was. I moved out to LA because I thought somehow I might have a shot of making it, but it seems nobody wants to hire an over-thirty-years-old dancer for a music video. I learned very quickly that in the dance industry over twenty-five means over the hill. I didn’t dance again for a long time, but after I had Dash I walked into our community center and this lady was teaching ballet to little girls. I don’t know what happened, but I sort of fell head over ass in love with them. They had little pink tutus and cute faces and they were so happy to be there. It reminded me of how I felt when I first went to dance class. So I started to help out with classes on the weekends and putting the little money I got from teaching into a savings account. I want to open my own little studio one day. I want something that I can build from the ground up.” She looked down at her hands, looking bashful for a moment. “It probably sounds like a silly dream to you.”
“No, it doesn’t. It’s a nice dream and if you marry me you can have it as soon as you wish. If you marry me you wouldn’t have to work so hard. You could spend more time with Dash. You can have everything you ever dreamed of for him.”
Chapter 5
We Need a Little Christmas …
But would she have her freedom?
Two years ago she would have jumped at the chance, but she didn’t want to be dependent on Ben. She didn’t want to be a user. She could support herself. She could make her own dreams come true.
And marriage? She knew she had been unlucky in the love department, but she held out hope that one day she would fall in love. That one day she could have the kind of marriage her mother and stepfather had. She wanted her own happy ending.
But how could she deny Dash the chance to have the world? She knew alone, even with child support, she couldn’t give him everything. She couldn’t be both his mother and father. She could raise him alone, but he deserved a father. She knew from her own childhood how hard it was to go without one.
“Oh, sir!” Rebecca came into the kitchen. “What are you doing in here cooking for yourself? You should have called for me.” She rushed forward looking more distressed than Dina had seen anybody be in a very long time. “I would have gotten anything you like. What can I do for you?”
“Well,” Dina said, “you can start by congratulating us. We just got engaged.”
“What!” She put her hand over her heart. “Excuse me. I was just surprised. Congratulations. Please, miss. Is there anything I can do for you?”
“She’s kidding, Rebecca. We don’t need anything. You may go.” He turned back to face Dina. “You’ll stay?”
“Yes. For twelve days. If I don’t like you or if I find out anything freaky about you, like you like to wear wedding dresses in your free time or you have a booger collection, I’m taking me and my kid out of here so fast your head will spin.”
“Okay. That sounds agreeable. We can discuss this more later if you would like.” He stood up and walked away.
“Ben,” she called when his foot hit the threshold. “Just one more thing?”
“What is it?”
“Can you show me how to get back to my room? I’m not sure how.”
* * *
Six hours later Ben sat alone in his office. The house was empty, as he had just sent his entire staff home for the holidays. It might have been a crazy move with a strange woman and baby in the house, but if he was going to be Dash’s father he wanted to spend time with the boy like a real father would. That meant no servants hovering around trying to do everything that he was capable of himself. He wanted time to get to know Dash.
“Sir?” He looked up when he heard Dovie’s voice.
He looked at the woman who was more his mother than his servant. She had barely come to see him anymore. Dash’s arrival had changed that. “Why do you call me sir? You know I don’t like it.”
Dovie lifted her head proudly. “Because it is proper. You are the head of the household. It’s a sign of respect.”
“You’ve given me a bath; you’ve changed my diapers. I think it would be all right if you called me by my given name like you used to.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Even if we are alone?”
“Fine.” She smiled at him. “Ben, I’ve come to tell you that I’m in love with that little boy. He looks just like you were when you were a baby. I could swoon.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“I took him and his mama shopping today. We got some really nice things for Ms. Gregory. Wait till you see her. The woman looks like Ava Gardner when she’s cleaned up. And Dash! Well, he really will be dashing when he wears the little suit she got for him to wear on Christmas day. She didn’t even spend a lot of money on it. She found it on the clearance rack. In fact, she barely spent any money at all. I think she’s a good woman, Ben.” Dovie looked into his eyes. “I was thinking since you don’t need me so much, maybe I could go live with them and help raise him.”
No.
He didn’t say the word, but it seemed his entire body stiffened at her request.
“I’ve invited her to stay, Dovie. I would like to raise Dash as my own.”
“Do you now?”
He wondered what was going on in Dovie’s mind. She clearly had an opinion she wasn’t willing to share. “I do. I also gave the entire staff the holidays off. I want you to go back to South Carolina and visit with your family.”