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Chapter 16

-Ledger-

The last traces
of mud swirled down the drain. We’d spent the last three hours of the day digging trenches in a downpour but when Frank, our gruff, stubborn boss finally realized he was paying three guys to dig out the same hole, only to have it fill with mud again, he decided to call off the work day. I was covered head to toe in dirt as I drove home, and I realized having a crummy truck wasn’t such a bad thing when you dug ditches for a living. But I wasn’t planning to be out there on Frank’s trench gang for long. I’d already gone into the city to pick up the brochures and applications for a well-known mechanic’s trade school. Jacy had made me rethink my life. I was ready to kick off the past and start thinking about a future.

I turned off the shower and heard a knock on the door. It sounded just frantic enough that I grabbed a towel and flung it around my waist on the way to the door.

Jacy was staring down at something on the sand and swung back around as I opened the door. Her eyes rounded as she looked down at my wet, half naked body. “Oh my. Nice. But get dressed. I need you down on the beach.” She turned to head back down the steps.

“What’s wrong?”

“Just hurry. It’s an emergency,” she called.

“Where’s Rex?” I asked hurriedly, figuring he must be in some kind of trouble.

“I had to take him home.” I could barely hear her as she disappeared below the hillside.

I ran back in and worked hard to pull jeans over wet skin. I yanked on my shirt and combed my wet hair back with my fingers. I threw on shoes and headed out the door.

A dozen scenarios had gone through my mind, but I hadn’t pictured the scene that met me on the sand. Jacy was halfway between the hillside and the shore. She was crouched down on the sand with a crust of bread in her hand and talking sweetly to a seagull. It was just before dusk and most of the rain clouds had cleared, leaving behind an eerie orange sunset. Most of the other birds had found safe places to roost for the night. But Jacy’s feathery friend seemed to be caught up in a long, twisty piece of plastic.

Jacy saw me out of the corner of her eye and put up her hand to stop me from coming closer. She inched forward a bit with the food, but the terrified bird flew up. It flapped its wings wildly, trying hard to take off, but gravity and the plastic bag were making it impossible. The bird arced through the air landing a good twenty feet away from Jacy and looking exhausted by its futile efforts.

Jacy jogged back to me, close to tears. “If I can just get near it, I could get the plastic off its leg. Otherwise, it doesn’t have a chance. I nearly had to tackle Rex when he went running after the poor thing.”

“Ah, so that is why he’s been banished from the beach.” I stared out at the seagull. It had managed to go about twenty feet with one burst of energy and crazy wing flapping, but it definitely looked tired. “I think I can catch it long enough for you to free it.”

“That’s why I called you down. I know you’re faster than me, and you can close the gap with those long legs. You can get pretty close before he gets scared and takes off.”

I nodded and walked slowly toward the bird. It eyed me coming closer and puffed up its feathers to try and look bigger. It had to be damn scary sitting as a piece of prey, knowing that your one method of escape was hampered by a plastic bag. “You’re O.K, buddy, we’re just going to get you out of that mess,” I said quietly.

I was fifteen feet from the bird when it mustered enough energy to take off. It wings worked extra hard. I took off at a run. It arced into the air, trailing the piece of plastic with it. As it came back down, I flew toward it and slid across the sand on my stomach. My hand snatched the plastic before the bird could take off again.

It squawked and its long, orange beak clapped at me like a big pair of unsharpened scissors. But I managed to wrap my hands around its body, trapping its wings securely against its sides. Its head had no problem pivoting completely around as its orange beak pecked and pinched my hands.

Jacy reached us and got right to work freeing the bird’s leg from the plastic. At first, the seagull struggled and bit us, but eventually, it seemed to understand what Jacy was doing and relaxed.

“See, you smart bird, you know we are trying to help,” Jacy said quietly. “Tada.” The plastic was free. “We’ve done our good deed for the day.” She straightened and wadded the plastic in a ball. I gave the bird a little toss, and it flew off.

Jacy lifted up on her tiptoes and kissed me. “You are now my hero. I just hate to see any animal suffer.”

“I know.”

A confused smile crossed her face. “How do you know that?”

“I know just with the way you take care of Rex and how you make sure he doesn’t hurt the birds,” I said quickly. It was a lame explanation, but the only thing I could come up with. She seemed to be considering my answer.

I pulled her into my arms. “Plus, you’re an angel, and angels always take care of the little creatures.”

“Guess that makes you one too. Only you’ve got that whole badass angel thing going on. But it works.” She hopped up on her toes for another kiss, and I was happy to oblige.

One thing was for damn sure, I needed to be more careful about what I said.

Chapter 17

-Ledger-

Orson State Penn, 9 months till release

Four to one
. That was the average ratio. I had to sit through four fucking stories about Tank’s life before I could hear one about Jacy. He was especially big on boasting about his money and fast cars and his glory days on the gridiron. I gritted my teeth through all of his self-centered, egotistical bullshit. My fondness for the guy shrank in direct proportion to the amount of time we were stuck together. And as I quickly grew to hate him, I just as quickly grew to admire Jacy.

Tank’s personality was grating. I wasn’t the only person who felt that way either. I was pretty sure his dreams of being sprung early were the only things that kept him from being pushed into a full on brawl because there were plenty of guys on the yard ready to beat the shit out of him.

With each story, it grew harder to believe that his wife even existed, or at least the one he described. How would it be possible for a woman like Jacy to fall for a man like Tank, or James Harville the third as he was more formally known? I, unfortunately, couldn’t ignore or avoid the gloating ass because we shared a brick box. And there was another reason I let him think we were friends. I didn’t want to stop hearing about Jacy. She was a woman whose picture I could only form in my mind from Tank’s short, superficial descriptions. She had unruly dark blonde hair and blue eyes, according to her husband, but there was nothing distinct or more substantial to go on. So I spent my daydreams, thinking about the smooth curve of her neck or the arch of her lips, even though it was all imaginary. But it was the stories that shaped the woman in my mind. It was the stories that were slowly pulling me in. I was falling in love with a woman who I would never meet and who might, very well, only exist in the imagination of my self-centered cellmate. But it was that crush, the complete admiration for Jacy, that got me through the long, boring days. Most of the time, I’d ask a question that would include her. Sometimes I got lucky, and it brought the topic back to her. I did it, even knowing it was a little cruel, making the guy think and talk about his wife. I sure as hell wouldn’t want to have to sit in a grimy, dank jail cell and think about a woman like Jacy sitting at home alone.

I’d spent my morning on the workout mats. The exercise had helped me get through the withdrawals from all the shit I’d been abusing before my arrest. It also helped me from going fucking nuts in a place that was the perfect setting for going insane. I’d just finished three intervals of push-ups when my cellmate joined me on the bench.

The corner with the bars and workout mats bordered the staff parking lot. All morning a stray dog had been hanging out at the fence with the futile hope that one of us giant, sweaty humans on the other side would have a morsel of food to share. Officer Hutch, one of the more likeable guards, had walked out with the rest of his sandwich and a bowl of water for the dog. Tank sat next to me, and we watched the dog happily eat his treat.

“Reminds me of Buckaroo,” Tank muttered as he stretched his legs out in front of him.

“Buckaroo?” I asked and held my breath hoping for a Jacy story.

“Yep, ugliest damn dog in the world. A stray that used to come sniffing around. Our house backed up to a forest. I’m pretty sure the thing was part coyote because it had these long bat ears and a weird shaped body. It was a mess. Some of its hair was missing and it only walked on three legs. One of them was always bent up like it was deformed or something. Jacy adopted it.”

Bingo. I wasn’t going to need an excuse to cut short his bullshit today.

“The animal was on its own and couldn’t hunt well because of the weird leg. So Jacy bought a dog house and food and water and put them at the edge of the yard. I laughed and told her the fucking thing was feral and would never come near a dog house or bowl of food. She proved me wrong.” He looked down at his hands and made a fist for a second, then released it. “Jacy was really good at proving me wrong.”

“Do you still live in the same house? Is she still feeding the dog, do you think?” I didn’t want the story to end. I hadn’t had my fill of her yet.

He shook his head and seemed to be thinking about something other than his story. “House is still there.” His mouth turned down on the sides in a hard frown. “I was pissed one day. Jacy had made plans to go away for a couple of days with her friends. She didn’t even fucking ask me. She just made the plans. Even had the nerve to ask me to feed the pathetic creature.”

For the first time since I’d started listening to his stories about Jacy, I felt myself tense with anger. I knew this story wasn’t headed anywhere good.

“She’s an adult. Why would she have to ask permission?” I knew the second the question popped out I’d get his full attention.

Tank turned to face me. His frown was now punctuated with a harsh glare. Deep down, I’d always figured we’d eventually come to blows. But I thought it would just stem from me no longer being able to stand his arrogant bullshit. I had to squash a sudden urge to pound the asphalt with his head.

“Have you ever been married, Cain?”

“No, I haven’t. But I like to think that if I did marry, I’d give my wife all the freedom an adult deserved.”

He laughed, but it wasn’t his usual. It was edged with anger. “Yeah? Well have fun with that. Frankly, not too sure you look like the steady marrying type.” He surveyed the tattoos covering my arms. “Can’t imagine too many women bring you home to meet the parents.”

Apparently, I’d stung his pride. He shrugged and got back to his story. “While she was gone, I called animal control and told them to get rid of the thing. Jacy cried, of course. But—”

“You needed to teach her a lesson.” The words came out soaked in bitter sarcasm, but his head was too thick and too wrapped in his own ego to notice.

“Damn right,” he went on, oblivious to the fact that I was clenching my jaw to keep myself from hitting him. He wasn’t worth an extra year in jail, and I was on my way to a good behavior release.

“I told her she was being selfish and stupid. Would have been dangerous to have around a newborn baby.” He stood with the last words.

“Baby?” I asked. “You never mentioned you had a kid.”

He walked away without another word.

Chapter 18

-Jacy-

A heavy rainstorm
right after the early rush had kept away customers for the rest of the morning. Even most of my usual customers had decided not to venture out for their cup of java. By ten o’clock, I was left with seven empty tables and a bakery shelf half-filled with the morning’s goodies.

I hadn’t heard from Rachel since early morning, but I was sure she was feeling the same effects from the bad weather. While we suffered a lot of cold, foggy mornings at Rockwood Beach, a downpour this early in the season was rare.

As I headed to my little office in the back to finish up purchase orders, the bell on the door rang. I stopped and turned back to help the customer.

Even walking in wet from a rainstorm, Ledger looked like an explosion of man. I still hadn’t gotten past the instantly shaky hands and knees when I saw him. As hard as I tried to warn myself not to lose my head over him, I found that it couldn’t be helped. I was mortal, after all.

“Let me guess,” I said as I walked back out to the counter, “work was cancelled due to rain.”

“Yep, turns out you can’t really dig a ditch when water is pouring down from the sky.” He came up to the counter. Water dripped from his hair and beard onto the stainless steel. He backed up. “Sorry about that.”

I grabbed a rag from under the counter and wiped away the drops.

Ledger glanced around at the empty tables. “Guess people don’t like to go out in the rain.”

“You’d think they were all made of sugar. The morning rush was more of a trickle. Even my loyal group of retired fisherman, men who spent half their lives soaked with sea water, decided their easy chairs were more inviting than the coffee shop.”

Water was streaming down the front window, making it hard to see outside. “Can’t really blame anyone. It’s pretty bad out there.” I walked to the baked goods and pointed to a banana nut muffin. “I’ve got a lot left.”

“I think I can help with that.”

I placed the muffin in front of him.

“What time do you close?” He took a bite of muffin.

“I usually turn the sign around before lunch. Most everyone has had their fill of coffee and muffins by then. I play it by ear, depending on the day.”

Ledger glanced around again at the empty shop. “Seems to me that you could flip that sign over early.”

I raised a brow at him. “Oh really? What did you have in mind?”

He gazed at me with a gleam in his eye as he took another bite, chewed and swallowed. “Uh, I think you
know
what I have in mind.”

I shrugged. “Maybe.”

I walked to front of the counter and was about to press myself against him but then remembered he was soaked with rain. I settled for running my fingers along the top of his hand. One thing was for sure, Ledger had awakened a side of me that I was sure I’d lost forever. In fact, the more I was with him, the more I realized that it was a side that I never knew I had.

I smiled up at him. “I just thought it would be that much more fun if you
told
me about your idea. A cold, dreary morning like this could really be brightened up with a little dirty talk.”

“I could do that.” He glanced in the direction of my office. “Hmm, let’s see.” He moved toward me, close enough that I could feel the cool moist air around him as the rain evaporated off his wet clothes. He looked pointedly at my lips and then dropped his gaze to my breasts, which were bound tightly in a blue sweater. “First, I’d take your hand and lead you into that cozy back office, the one that is scented with your fragrance, your shampoo and that incredible sweet aroma that seems to follow you wherever you are.” His foot slid between mine and he wedged his work boot back and forth to push apart my feet. His eyes were darker than usual as he gazed down at me from beneath heavy lids. “I’d start with you like this, legs spread for full access to that amazing fucking pussy of yours.” His voice was low and gravelly, and the words coupled with the deep, gritty tone made a hot blush cover my body. I could feel the heat all the way up to my face.

Ledger grinned, apparently, noticing the sudden rush of color in my cheeks. My obvious physical reaction encouraged him to continue. “Then”—he paused and squinted down at me as if he was giving it a lot of thought—“Those jeans—” He looked pointedly down at my pants. “They’d have to come off. Same with the hot little panties that I’m envisioning right now. Purple?”

I smiled. “Pink.”

“Close enough. Besides, those would be coming off too.”

He moved close enough that his wet shirt brushed me. It felt cool against the hot blush on my skin. “Then, my hot, sweet, highly kissable darlin’, I’d bend you over that desk of yours and fuck you until you were crying out my name.”

I hadn’t realized I’d been holding my breath until I felt lightheaded from it. Or it could have just been the man in front of me. In fact, I was sure that was it.

A nervous giggle followed the air rushing back into my lungs. “That ended sort of quickly. Thought you’d drag that scenario out longer,” I teased.

He took hold of my hand. “I got impatient. And now that I’ve said it out loud—” He pulled me along the tiny hallway.

I stopped. “Wait. Let me at least turn over my sign and lock the door.” My heart raced with excitement as I hurried back out to the shop. I breathed a sigh of relief when I didn’t see anyone parking out front. I laughed at that thought. It wasn’t often that I kept my fingers crossed that there were no customers out front. I locked the door and flipped the sign. I tilted my head to glance at Rachel’s shop. It was ten, which meant she was decorating cakes.

I walked quickly back to my office and pushed open the door. A gasp shot from my lips as my eyes landed on the incredibly handsome and incredibly naked man standing in front of my desk, a desk that looked comically small behind him.

He leaned his hands on the desk and sat back. His cock stood straight out, inviting me to come closer. “I couldn’t tell if that was a good gasp or a bad gasp.”

I kicked off my shoes and walked toward him. “Let’s just say it was a good gasp at the sight of a very bad man.” I landed in his arms. His skin still felt cool from the rain.

His kiss started lightly and then deepened as he fumbled with the button on my jeans. “Off, remember,” he muttered against my mouth.

I stepped back just long enough to push my jeans down and step out of them. I reached for my panties.

“No, I’ll take those off.” He took hold of my waist and swung me around so that I was facing my desk. My stack of purchase orders were sitting in a stack, patiently waiting to be input into the computer. A condom packet was sitting next to the stapler and something about it, or maybe it was the excitement of doing this in my office, brought forth a nervous giggle.

“Something funny?” he asked as he moved behind me. His hard body was no longer cool from the rain. Quite the opposite. I could feel layers of charged heat coming off of him as he reached down, took hold of my wrists and placed my hands on the desk in front of me. His breaths came faster as he pushed my panties down.

“You weren’t kidding about any of it, were you?”

He leaned his mouth next to my ear. “You started this with your dirty talk suggestion.” His cock pressed against my ass as his hand reached around to my pussy. His fingers caressed me lightly as his breath warmed my neck. “Are you regretting it?”

I pushed my bottom out farther, making sure to wiggle it against his erection. “Not for a minute. But I might never look at paperwork the same again.”

“It’s all your fault for being so damn irresistible. Now, spread those legs, baby, just like I showed you.”

I scooted my feet apart. He pushed my hair over my shoulder and kissed the back of my neck as his hand reached around and his finger drifted through the moist folds of my pussy. It seemed I was always thinking of this lately, of Ledger and me, together.

The teasing and light atmosphere vanished. “Jacy,” he whispered against my skin. “I can’t get enough of you. When I’m not with you, I ache with wanting to have you.”

“Ledger.” His name came out on a sigh. It was the only word I could utter. My mind was in that swirl of emotion that fired up every time Ledger touched me. My body was at the height of arousal. I found it hard to keep my legs under me.

Ledger’s long arm reached past me and he took hold of the condom. Seconds later, his hand took hold of my waist. His free hand, once again, curled around me and he pressed it between my legs. A sound that was close to a whimper came from my throat as he deftly stroked my clit. Again, he lowered his mouth to my neck, but this time, he positioned himself closer.

With a firm grip on my hip and his hand between my legs, he urged me to push my ass out farther. “That’s it, baby,” he growled. “That’s what I need.”

I drew in a fast hard breath as he pushed his cock inside of me. My pussy was tender from the last few nights, and somehow that ache, that knowledge that he’d caused the tenderness, made the sensations more intense.

I gripped the desk and worked hard to keep my arms and legs steady as he thrust against me. His movements sped up. My small desk couldn’t withstand the power behind it. It stuttered in small increments across the floor.

I found myself pushing back to meet Ledger each time, taking in every inch of him. All the while, I moved against the pressure of his hand between my legs. Light splintered around me, and I braced myself as he took me over the edge of an orgasm.

“Oh, Ledger!” I cried out. My body felt as if it would melt into a puddle. If it hadn’t been for the desk, I would have collapsed to the floor.

He firmly gripped my hips with both hands as he moved with a frenzy that pushed my desk another few inches. Then he stabbed into me one more time and held me against him as he came.

We stood in my tiny office, braced against my desk, as our ragged breaths slowed to normal. Ledger wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly against him. He kissed my shoulder. “I say you shut down for the day, and we take this party of two back to my place.”

“Sounds like a perfect solution for a rainy day.”

A solid knock on the front window startled me. “Shit.” I pulled from his arms and made a dash for my panties and jeans. I could hear Rachel calling me through the front window as her knock grew more urgent. I quickly pulled on my clothes. “She’ll be worried if she sees my car but doesn’t see me.”

“That’s cool that you both keep an eye out for each other.” Ledger wasn’t in quite as big a hurry to get dressed. He gathered up his clothes and headed for the tiny bathroom at the back of the office.

“When you come out, try not to look too much like—” Another warm glow heated my cheeks. “Well, you know. Try not to make it too obvious about what we’ve been up to. I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“I’ll try to make it seem as if we were just discussing the weather instead of shuffling your desk around the room during a wild round of fucking.” He laughed as he closed the bathroom door behind him.

I smoothed my hair, as if that was something that could be done, or as if it was something Rachel would even notice. I hurried out to the front room. I could see Rachel visibly relax when she saw that I was all right.

I unlocked the door, and she pushed inside.

“Oh my God, Jacy, I was about to call the police. What the heck were you doing? Scared me to death.”

Seeing how badly I’d frightened her, I gave her a hug. “So sorry, Rachel. There were no customers, and I had paperwork to do, so I locked up.” It was a perfectly logical excuse, even if I felt a pang of guilt for lying to my best friend.

“Oh, guess I forgive you then. I’m going to have a lot of bread and cookies leftover.” She looked at my bakery counter. “You are too, I see. I thought we could pack them up and drive them over to the soup kitchen.”

“Perfect idea. I’ll start putting everything in bags.” I was hoping I could get her back to the door before she realized that I had a visitor in back. Not that I minded if she knew, but Rachel tended to overreact to everything. And me in a real relationship would be worthy of her overreaction. Mostly because she’d been pleading with me to move on with my life since my divorce became final.

Rachel was just steps from walking out when Ledger emerged from the back room. Her radar alerted her. She swung back around. Her mouth dropped open. She snapped it shut and looked at me. “Thought there might be more to the locked door story. Well, I guess I’ll let you two finish whatever you started.”

“We finished,” I blurted, and then felt immediately embarrassed. “Weather discussion.” I waved my hand back toward Ledger. “We were in my office talking about rain.”

Rachel laughed. “That’s why I love ya, Jacy. I can take those leftover baked goods to the soup kitchen myself. You look busy.”

“No, I’ll drive with you. Let me just get things packed up.”

“Yep, I was just on my way out.” Ledger kissed me lightly on the lips. “Come over when you’re done.”

Rachel watched him walk out and then, as expected, squealed as she turned back around. “So things have moved on to
rain discussions
, huh?”

I couldn’t hold back a smile. “Pretty much.” I walked to the bakery counter and pulled out some paper bags to fill. I stopped and looked at her. “Oh, Rach, I’m trying so hard not to lose my head over this man, but he makes it hard.”

“I’ll bet. He is something else.” Rachel sauntered over, with the grin still plastered across her face.

“I haven’t been with any man, not in a serious way, since—since James.” It was hard just saying his name. Everything about my time with James had been a nightmare, and if I let myself think about it too much, I was sure to lose my nerve with Ledger.

Rachel reached across and put her hand on my arm. “Ledger isn’t James. What does your heart say?”

“Don’t know. It hasn’t slowed down enough to make any sense. But I really like him. I just don’t want to be disappointed.”

“You won’t be. Trust your instincts on this, Jacy.”

“I will. I’m just not sure how reliable my instincts are.” I stared down at the stack of cookies on the counter. “I am completely comfortable with Ledger, and I spend a ludicrous amount of time thinking about him. And, it seems he is constantly thinking about me. But something keeps nudging at me. Something that I can’t put my finger on.”

“That’s just nerves, Jacy. This is all new to you. You’ll see. Everything will be fine.”

BOOK: Hard Core
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