Read Hailey Twitch and the Campground Itch Online
Authors: Lauren Barnholdt
“Wow,” I say. “I think that is a very good
look for you, Maya.” I take a big bite of syrupy waffle. But Maya Greenbert is very mad.
“You!” she says. And she points at me. “You did this to my hair!”
“Me?” I put a very shocked look on my face. “I could not do that to your hair. I am only seven. And people who are only seven do not know how to give other people green hair!” Which is very true.
“I did not mean it,” Maybelle says. “I was trying to make her shampoo so that it would get bub, bub, bubbly, and she would have to spend a long time washing it out. But I do not think I did it right.” She looks down at her wand with a very sad face.
“Okay, Maya,” my mom says. “Calm down. I am sure it's just something that happened with your shampoo. Go and get the bottle, and we'll see if we can call the company who makes it.”
Addie Jokobeck is looking at me. So is
Kaitlyn. But I did not do it. And they cannot prove it. So I just say, “Kaitlyn, would you like some syrup?” And then I enjoy the rest of that wonderful breakfast.
After breakfast, my dad takes me and Addie Jokobeck to the beach. That is because my mom and Kaitlyn and Maya are still working on her hair problem. They are driving her to the hairdressing shop down the road. So that she can get her hair all dyed up. I do not like going to the hairdressing shop. That is because the ladies there always cut your hair all off and yank it with a brush. Then they tell you you should do a much better job of brushing your hair every day. That is called being lectured. And it is not very fun or funny.
I am wearing my new blue and purple
bathing suit. And Addie is wearing her bathing suit that used to be green but is now black. Yikes.
Maybelle is not wearing any bathing suit. She is wearing a yellow dress. That is because she is scared of the water. She said that sprites do not like to go swimming. I tried to tell her there is nothing to be scared of. But she did not want to listen. So she is over sitting in the sand. And she is looking very grump, grump, grumpy.
My dad is sitting on the sand, too. He is reading a book and looking very grumpy just like Maybelle. That is because he is supposed to be golfing right now with his very best friend Ted. But he could not go. On account of the fact that he had to take us to the beach. On account of the fact that my mom had to take Maya and Kaitlyn to get Maya's hair fixed. On account of her green hair.
I think she should have just kept that
beautiful green hair. It was very special and different. But no one would listen to me.
“Now,” I say to Addie when we are in the lake. “You and me are going to play sharks.” I put my hand up in the water. “I am a shark and that is my fin, and I am going to get you.”
Addie shrieks and tries to splash me. But you cannot just splash a shark away. It does not work like that.
“I am a shark!” I say again. And I grab Addie's leg in the water. “And you are my dinner!”
I wait for Addie Jokobeck to scream very loud. She does not like to be startled. But when it does not happen, I look up. And that is because I did not grab Addie Jokobeck's leg! I grabbed someone else's. A boy!
This is horrible since I do not like strangers. And I do not like boys. This weird boy is giving me a very big smile. He is missing all his top and bottom teeth, and he has five whole freckles on his nose. And then I recognize him immediately right away! He is the red-haired boy who pushed me right out of the way in the arcade! He ran up and stole that stuffed dog that I really wanted.
“Sorry, Boy,” I say. “I thought you were my friend Addie Jokobeck.” I turn around to look for Addie. And there she is, splashing over in the water away from me.
“Addie!” I yell. “We are supposed to be playing shark. Remember?”
“Yes,” she says. “You were going to be a shark and find me and eat my brains.”
“Right!” I say. “Because your ship has overturned, and you are lost at sea and a big pirate was after you, but now you are maybe going to get eaten right up by a shark.”
I go to swim underwater. I am very good at underwater swimming. You just blow water right out of your nose and keep your eyes shut very, very tight, and it is very easy and fun.
But before I can go into that nice cool water, someone is tapping me on the shoulder. I turn around. It is that boy!
“Boy,” I say. “Please go away.”
“My name is not Boy,” he says. And he gives me a big grin. “My name is Hayden, and I am eight, and I have seen a shark in real life.”
I do not want to listen to this. But I have to admit that I am very interested in someone who has seen a shark in real life.
“You saw it in this water?!” Addie Jokobeck yells. She is looking like maybe she wants to run right out of this place. “I told you it was too cold to go swimming, Hailey!”
“No,” Hayden the Stranger Boy says. “I did not see it here. I saw it in North Carolina. That's where my grandma lives.”
“Did that shark bite you?” I ask him. I look at his arms to see if there are any huge teeth marks.
“No,” he says.
“Did you get a picture of it?”
“No.”
“Was it a big story on the news?”
“No.”
“Then you are a liar.”
“I am not a liar!” he says. But I do not believe him. Because “I am not a liar” is what I say when I am lying about something.
“Come on, Addie,” I say. “That boy we just met is a big fat liar.” We swim away, and then
Maybelle flies over and gives that boy a little paddle of water with her wings. And it goes right into his face. I want to laugh. But I do not. Because it is not that good to get water right in your face. It happened to me at a pool party once, and I did not like it one little bit.
“Wait!” the boy says. He is swimming very fast behind us. I just ignore him. But then he says, “Aren't you the girl who made that arcade game go crazy and give everyone stuffed animals?”
I stop swimming right away.
“Maybe,” I say. “Why do you want to know?”
“Yeah,” Addie says. “Why are you asking her that?” She comes over and stands really close to me in the water. That is what is called being one very true friend.
“I am asking,” the boy says, “because you are very famous.”
“Famous!” I say.
“Famous!” Maybelle says.
“Famous?” Addie Jokobeck asks.
“Yes,” the boy says. “You are very famous, and everyone is still talking about it.”
“Yes, well, it was me,” I say. “My name is Hailey Twitch, and I do not give autographs.” I have never been famous before! I wonder if they are going to put my picture in a magazine or in the newspaper or on an Internet website! Or hang it on the wall in the arcade. Maybe I will get some kind of prize or award. Like a million dollars even! Or maybe they willâ
“Hailey Twitch!” someone yells from the beach. It is probably one of my fans. Fans
are what you have when you get to be very famous. They are people who love your work. I will just have to tell that fan that I am very busy and I do not give autographs, thank you very much.
But when I turn around, it is not a fan! It is Mr. Tuttle! Mr. Tuttle, who runs the Department of Magic, and who gave Maybelle two weeks to get her magic under control! But it has not been two weeks yet. I know this because I am very good with days. That is because I have a very special Velcro calendar that shows all the days and even has a good place for weather.
“Hailey Twitch!” he says again. He is standing on the beach and waving his arms all around like he is craze, craze, crazy. I am starting to get very nervous in my stomach. I do not know what to do. Addie Jokobeck is right there with that boy Hayden!
“Um, excuse me, please,” I say to Addie and
Hayden. “Excuse me, please" is a very polite thing to say and is good for when you want to use your manners. “I will be right back.”
I run right up on the beach. “Hailey!” Mr. Tuttle is yelling. He is trying to run after me. But he is having a hard time. That is because he has a very big belly. I do not think he is in very good shape. He probably needs to do a few exercise classes like the way my mom does.
“Hailey!” Mr. Tuttle says. He is huffing and puffing up behind me. “Please do not run away from me! It is very rude and not good manners.”
I want to tell him that being very rude and not using good manners is showing right up when someone is having a very fun game of shark with their very best friend Addie Jokobeck and also learning all about how they are famous. But I do not say that. Because I do not want to upset Maybelle.
She is flying all around my head and is getting very nervous. Maybelle is very afraid of Mr. Tuttle. She thinks he is worse than a principal even.
I sit down on the beach and pretend to be making a sand castle just in case my dad looks right over here. And Maybelle sits down right next to me. Her face is getting very splotch, splotch, splotchy like she is going to start crying
any minute even. “Maybelle,” I say. “You better get it together.”
Mr. Tuttle pulls out his clipboard.
“Now,” he says, “as you know, I have given Maybelle two weeks to practice her magic.”
“Right,” I say. I am trying to maybe sneak a look at his clipboard. I need to know what he is writing on there! I am looking right out of the corner of my eye very sneaky like. That is the way this boy Randall in my class does it when he is trying to look and copy answers off other people's spelling tests.
“That is fourteen days,” Mr. Tuttle tells me.
“I know how long two weeks is,” I say. “I am in the second grade, remember?” We have
learned all of that stuff forever ago about days and months and years even.
Mr. Tuttle stands up very straight, straight, straight. His big brown shoes are sinking right into the sand. “So far Maybelle has changed your socks into two different colors, knocked down the gingerbread house in the play
The Gingerbread Princess,
made some poison ivy appear, and turned a girl named Maya Greenbert's hair green.” He looks at me over his glasses. “Is this true?”
“Um, well⦔ I look at Maybelle. I think about maybe telling a little fib. But I know that I cannot lie to Mr. Tuttle. He is the head of the Department of Magic. And so he knows everything. He really is just like a principal. So I say, “Yes, that is true.”