Grievous Sin (23 page)

Decker muttered out loud, “So what’s wrong with that?”

Rina laughed, then began to cry.

“Honey, it’s all in your
mind.
”

“The reading on the scale is not in my mind, Peter!”

“Why the hell are you weighing yourself when you’ve just delivered days ago?”

“I always weigh myself. That’s what women do.”

“You’re setting yourself up. Of course you’ve got a little extra weight. You’ve just had a baby, for Christ’s sake!”

“Will you stop scolding me!” Rina yelled.

Decker didn’t answer, reminding himself to unclench his jaw and breathe normally. He had popped an Advil fifteen minutes ago when he had felt a headache coming on. Maybe he should have taken two. Finally, he said softly, “I know you won’t believe this, darlin’. But really, you are still very sexy to me!”

“It’s not enough to be sexy to you, Peter,” Rina whispered. “I want to feel sexy, period! Feel like a woman again. I want to
look
like a woman again. Not some useless piece of breeding stock. That’s why I want to be with Hannah. At least when I’m with her, I see what my body produced.” She smiled softly. “She was worth every lump and bump. I just wish I…” Tears formed in her eyes. “What’s the use?”

Decker digested all her words. “You think about your appearance a lot?”

“Not a lot. Just when I feel useless
and
look like a cow.” Rina paused. “That’s not totally true. I do think about how I
look. Every woman does. Just because I have a ring on my finger doesn’t mean I don’t take pride in my appearance. Don’t you?”

Decker said, “Truthfully, I don’t give it a whole lot of thought. Just as long as I’m clean…maybe I should. Do you have any complaints?”

“No, Peter, I don’t. And that’s the problem—the unfairness of it all. Men appraise, and women are appraised.”

Decker slipped under the covers and wiped a tear off his wife’s face. “One of the nicest things about my position at the department is, I don’t have a lot of people standing over my shoulder…checking me out. Sure, I have bosses, but I’ve got a lot of independence. I’d hate to have people judging me all the time. I guess in a way, you have fifty percent of the adult population always judging you, although I dare say your ratings are always superior. Even so, that’s pressure that most men don’t think about.”

“And it’s out of our control. We can’t help what we look like…how we age…if we get a hysterectomy…”

Decker cuddled his wife. “All I can say is I love
you
, not your uterus, and I think you’re beautiful. And by beautiful, I mean the inside kind as well as outside. I was attracted to the outside beauty, no question about it. But I fell in love with the inside beauty. And I’ll think you’re beautiful even when you’re old and wrinkled.” He paused. “Because however old you are, I’ll be twelve years older.”

Rina slugged his good shoulder.

“So for the past three years, you’ve looked like my daughter. How about you giving me a break and start looking like what you are. My second and younger—much, much
younger
—wife.”

Rina was quiet for a minute. Then she said, “We’d better get some sleep.”

“You mean you don’t want to engage in mad, passionate sex?”

Rina broke into laughter.

“Just trying to make you feel good about yourself.”

Rina shook her head, then kissed his lips. “I love you. Thanks for talking to me.”

“Honey, it’s my pleasure.”

Rina flopped down on the bed. “I’m exhausted. Good night.”

“Good night.” Decker fluffed up his pillow. Infinitely better than a tree trunk.

Sleeping through the
six o’clock feeding, Decker thought, Some mother I’d make. But by seven-thirty, he had showered, shaved, dressed, and felt almost human again. Rina had fallen back asleep, so Decker took his
tallit
and
tefillin
out of the bedroom, opting to say his morning prayers in the living room. Standing over Hannah’s crib, watching her snooze, he had a lot to be thankful for and felt God should know about it. He had just about finished winding the leather straps of his phylacteries over the boxes when Hannah began to stir, cheeks flushed and a look of displeasure stamped across the tiny features. Within seconds the unhappy physiognomy was howling in protest. Decker took off his prayer shawl and stowed it in the velvet bag, then picked up his daughter.

“Do we have something to say?”

Hannah turned her face toward the sound of his voice, eyes slowly opening.

“Good morning. Did you have a nice nap?”

The baby didn’t answer and continued to focus through sleepy eyes. Decker felt something on his arm and looked at his jacket sleeve. A damp spot had darkened the material from gray to black. “I’ll make a deal with you, Hannah Rosie. I’ll change your diaper if you don’t give me any surprises.”

The baby continued to stare.

“Yeah, as if you give a hoot. Your clothes don’t have to be dry-cleaned.” He gently placed her in the Portacrib and changed her soaked diaper, tickling her tummy when he was done. “Feeling better?”

The baby let out a sudden howl. Quickly, Decker swooped her up. “We certainly do have opinions.”

Nora walked in. “Tell me the truth, Sergeant. Did you wake her up?”

“Absolutely not. She woke up of her own accord. I just changed her diaper and was slow to pick her up. That didn’t set well with her.”

Nora held out her hands. “Go get some breakfast.”

“Boys get off to school okay?”

“Sure did. Your big girl made them breakfast and left with them in the car ’bout half an hour ago. There’s a box of cornflakes on the counter, milk’s in the fridge.”

“Thanks.”

The front door opened, and Cindy waltzed through. She threw her arms around her father’s neck and kissed his cheek. “Good morning, Paterfamilias. May I offer you some victuals for your daytime fare?” She noticed Nora holding Hannah. “Well, look who’s up?” She plucked the baby from the nurse’s arms and started walking toward the kitchen. “How’s the sanest person in the family? Would you like your sugar water?”

Decker’s eyes went from Cindy to Nora. “She’s in a good mood.”

Nora laughed and began cleaning the living room. “Between your wife and Cindy, I don’t have to do a thing. Easiest money I ever made.”

“Don’t complain.”

“Who’s complaining?” The nurse laughed again.

Decker followed his daughter into the kitchen, took out a knife, and halved one of the grapefruits he’d picked last night. It was pink and juicy. “You’re certainly chipper this morning.”

“I got sleep.” Cindy poured bottled drinking water into a four-ounce bottle and added a teaspoon of sugar. “When I’m rested, I’m invincible.”

“How’s your memory, Superwoman?”

“Uh-oh.” Cindy sat down and began to feed the baby. “Something’s on the sergeant’s mind.”

Decker was silent. Cindy said, “Really, Daddy. Do you need to ask me something?”

“When you were in the nursery, Cindy, do you remember any black women hanging around Marie Bellson?”

“Black women?”

“Or just maybe a specific black woman. Don’t confine yourself to nurses. She could be a doctor, an orderly, a janitor, an administrator, a medical-supplies salesperson—just as long as she’s big and black.”

“Why?”

“I’ll tell you in a moment, after you’ve answered the question. But take your time. Think sequentially, Cindy—take it day by day.”

Cindy was quiet as Hannah happily downed her sugar water. “You may be asking the wrong person. I tried to avoid Marie as much as possible.”

Decker cut wedges of his grapefruit. “Do you remember
any
black women loitering around the nurseries, period?”

Cindy thought for a long time. “I think I remember a black cleaning woman.”

“You know, I remember one, too,” Decker said. “I’m going to have to go over my notes inch by inch.”

“And of course, there was Lily. But she belonged there.”

Decker looked up from his grapefruit. “Who’s Lily?”

“One of the neonate nurses.”

“What?”

“What’s wrong, Daddy?”

“This Lily is black?”

“Last time I saw her she was.”

“Don’t be cute. Do you know her last name?”

“No, but Darlene would. I think Lily was one of her trainees.”

“Why the hell don’t I remember the name?” Decker dashed out of the kitchen and opened his briefcase, quickly sorting through his notes. Cindy followed, babe in arms, and took a seat at the dining-room table.

“What is it, Daddy?”

“Just a sec, okay?”

“What are you looking for? Maybe I can help.”

“It’s not what I’m…just hold on, please.” Decker sat down and began to examine his notes more carefully. “I don’t have any Lily written down for Nursery J. Just a Christine Simms.”

“What about Christine? She isn’t black.”

“I know that. Do you remember seeing Christine the night Caitlin Rodriguez was taken?”

Cindy furrowed her brow in concentration. “Yes…yes, definitely.”

“How about this Lily person?”

Again Cindy thought a while. “I don’t remember if I met her the night of the kidnapping or the night before. But like I said, Darlene would know if Lily was on duty.”

“According to my notes, Darlene didn’t mention Lily, and I asked her all about the people under her care.”

“Then probably Lily wasn’t on that night. All that hospital time blurs for me, Daddy.”

“But even if Lily wasn’t on
official
duty, she could have been hanging around Nursery J and you wouldn’t have thought a thing about it.”

“No, not at all. But I don’t know why she’d hang around the nurseries if she wasn’t on duty…unless you think she was involved.”

Decker didn’t answer.

Quietly, Cindy asked, “Daddy, why’d you specifically ask about a big black woman?”

Decker ran his hand down his face. “The bones in the Honda don’t belong to Marie, honey. They belong to a big
and heavy woman who’s probably black. Was Lily big and heavy?”

Cindy nodded gravely, then her eyes began to water. Decker felt like a jerk. He should have been more subtle in his questioning, remembering Cindy was his
daughter,
not just another witness. But once he got into the swing of questioning, it was hard to turn off the cop mode.

“She seemed like a nice person,” Cindy said. “Lily, I mean. She was young…not much older than I am.”

“Princess, we haven’t even identified the body yet. This Lily could be safe and sound, at home watching TV and munching Cheetos as we speak. I shouldn’t be exposing you to this kind of garbage.”

“No, it’s really…” Cindy forced herself to smile at Hannah. “Do you actually think Marie Bellson
killed
Lily?”

“I won’t even begin to speculate before we have an I.D. on the bones. Right now I’m thinking about Darlene. I don’t know if she was holding out on me or if she just made an honest mistake.”

“Or like I said, maybe Lily wasn’t on duty, Daddy.”

“Maybe.” Decker put down his briefcase and went back into the kitchen. He stared at the grapefruit resting on the counter. His stomach was a knot, but he had to eat if he was going to be productive. He put up a pot of coffee, poured himself a bowl of cereal, scrambled some eggs, and forced breakfast down his gullet. Going through his notes one more time, he couldn’t understand how this Lily person was overlooked. About ten minutes later, Cindy came in with Hannah and sat beside him. Decker took his daughter’s hand.

“Are you okay, Cindy?”

“Fine.”

“Honey, I want you to forget about the case, all right?”

“No, it’s not all right. If you need my help, you
have
to ask me. You owe it to Caitlin Rodriguez.”

Decker stood. “I’d better get to work.”

“You’re brushing me off.”

“No, honestly, I want to get to the hospital and talk to
Darlene…if she’s even there. I’ve got to check out Lily. I’ve got a load of details to work out if I’m ever going to make headway on this case.”

“Speaking of specific details, did you ever find a box to fit the key we found in Marie Bellson’s apartment?”

Decker shook his head. “Not yet.”

“What happened with Tandy Roberts yesterday?”

“Cindy, please.”

“I’m curious.”

Hannah began swallowing air bubbles. Decker said, “I think she needs to be burped. Give her to me. I’ll do it.”

Cindy handed him a diaper. “Cover your jacket.”

Decker threw the diaper over his shoulder and began walking with his daughter. As he patted her back, her eyes widened, her expression seemingly remorseful for her gluttony. Her stomach was sloshing liquid.

Decker said, “You’ve got good head control, Hannah Rosie.”

“I told you she was precocious.”

“Takes after Sis.” Decker smiled.

Cindy smiled back, then looked at the ceiling. “So what’s with Tandy?”

“Why do you keep asking about her?”

“Because she was a friend of Marie’s. I’m wondering who the heck could be Marie’s friend?”

“Paula was Marie’s friend.”

“Is it the same situation as Paula? Was Marie Tandy’s training nurse?”

Decker didn’t answer. He heard Cindy sigh, then said, “I know you’re your own person, Cynthia, but I see
my
obsessive streak in you. It’s bad enough when cases eat me up. Why should they eat you up, too? Especially when you’re not even getting paid.”

“So you do it for the money, Dad?”

“It puts bread on the table.”

“You do it because you
like
it. Be honest. If it was just
money, you’d have been a senior partner in Grandpa’s firm by now.”

“Yes, I like what I do. But I’ve been trained and you haven’t, and therein lies the rub.”

“How can I be trained if no one will train me?”

“This isn’t an apprentice job, Cynthia. If you want to be a cop, apply to the Academy.” Decker paused. “God, what am I
saying
! You don’t want to be a
cop,
for godsakes! You’re way too smart for that.”

“Implying that you’re a cop because you’re dumb?”

“Princess, I applied because I didn’t know any better. I was a twenty-year-old kid with no guidance who had just gotten out of the army. I was at loose ends, and someone suggested being a cop. Like a dunce, I signed up. Just like with the army. They said sign up, I signed up. You know what, Cindy? I was
dumb
!”

“So why did you come back to it even after you passed the bar?”

“Because being an estate lawyer was worse than being a cop. I did it to please your mother, who wanted me to be just like Grandpa. I should have signed up for the D.A.’s Office.” Decker paused. “Not that I’m complaining…”

“I think your work is exciting.”

“Mostly, my job is paperwork and legwork, but yes, it can be exciting. And it can also be dangerous.” He started to pat the bullet scar on his shoulder, but stopped himself. Last thing he wanted to do was to traumatize his daughter any further. “You’ve conveniently left out dangerous, Cynthia.”

“What am I doing that’s dangerous? Asking a few questions?”

“Cindy, someone presoaked a body and Marie’s Honda with gasoline and pushed them both off a hundred-foot drop.” Decker suddenly lost patience. “We’re talking
desperate
people. Stop arguing with me and just stay put.”

“Can you at least tell me if Tandy’s a nurse? Last question, I promise.”

Decker bit his lip. “Yes, Tandy might be a nurse.”

Hannah let out a big burp.

“Atta girl, Han, you take after your old man.”

Cindy said, “I never remember you belching.”

“You never saw me in my rowdier days after a couple of six-packs.”

“You were once rowdy?”

“Before your time. ’Bout a century ago.”

Cindy smiled. “I’ll take the baby.”

Decker gave his little daughter to his big one and studied them both with pride. Two girls with two boys in the middle. A beautiful and bountiful family. All he had to do was make sure no harm befell any of them for the rest of their lives.

“So what did Marge think of Tandy?” Cindy asked.

“You promised last question. Now, forget about the case. Leave it up to the police.” He kissed her cheek. “I’m going to say good-bye to Rina. No more talk about joining the Academy, okay?”

“I wasn’t intending to drop out of college, Daddy.”

“Thank God one of us can think!” He kissed his daughters, pinched both of their cheeks. “Bye.”

“Bye.” Cindy sat back in the chair, waiting for her father to leave. Having studied him as he talked, she had recognized that look in his eyes—trying to be casual, but he had been concerned. She knew why. Her questions were good ones, but he didn’t want her to know that. Tandy was involved. Since old Dad wasn’t about to help her out, Cindy decided to check out Ms. Roberts by her own lonesome.

She rocked Hannah in her arms until her father called out another bye. She answered him, breathing a sigh of relief when the door closed. In the distance, she heard the motor to the unmarked kick in, then recede in Dopplerian fashion.

They’d located Tandy at a gym, but Cindy didn’t remember the name of the place.

How in the world would she ever be an ace detective if she couldn’t remember simple things like names of places? She sighed. Holding Hannah firmly in the crook of her right
arm, she pulled out a phone book with the left hand. Under the Yellow Pages, she found two columns’ worth of listings under “Gyms.” She studied each name carefully, stopping when she hit the name Silver’s.

That was it.

Security was still tight and visible, but the extreme tension brought on by yesterday’s crisis had dissipated. Within a few months, Decker predicted Sun Valley Pres would return to its normal lackadaisical self, more concerned with budgetary issues than with medical problems. The administrative offices didn’t open before nine, leaving Decker with forty-five minutes to track down Darlene Jamison and the duty roster the night of Caitlin Rodriguez’s kidnapping.