Read Goodnight Sweetheart Online
Authors: Annie Groves
‘Dad’s had a word with Auntie Violet and she’s promised us a nice piece of ham and some of her home-made sausages. If you want, you can tell that Anne she’s invited, seeing as how she’s helpin’ with the food,’ said June.
‘I thought we’d go down to the hall the week before and give it a good clean out – scrub the floor, and that, and the vicar says we can have the Christmas decorations up if we want to make it look a bit festive,’ June told Molly, adding, ‘Oh, and guess what I’ve heard. I saw that Sandra, and she told me that Daisy Cartwright has had to bring her two kiddies back from Wales on account of her Davie wettin’ the bed.’
Molly stiffened. Was their neighbour’s little boy the child the WVS supervisor had been talking about so unkindly?
‘Yoo-hoo.’
Molly hurried downstairs to welcome their neighbour and then came to a full stop when she saw Eddie standing behind his aunt. She blinked once to make sure she wasn’t seeing things, and then a second time to blink away her happy tears.
The temptation to run to him almost overwhelmed her. She heard June come downstairs and into the kitchen, but she couldn’t stop looking at Eddie, greedily absorbing the reality of him. She could hear June and Elsie talking, but she was oblivious to what they were saying, oblivious to everything and everyone but Eddie.
‘I’ve brought you a bit of summat back wi’ me, like I promised,’ she heard him telling her as he offered her a big flat parcel.
‘What’s going on here? You buying our Molly presents, Eddie?’ June asked sharply, but Molly wasn’t listening to her.
Very carefully she opened the brown-paper-wrapped package. Inside it was sky-blue silk taffeta of the most beautiful shade she had ever seen.
‘It was me Auntie Elsie as put the idea into me head,’ Eddie told her gruffly. ‘She said as how you were having to wear Sally’s sister-in-law’s bridesmaid’s dress, and that you didn’t much like the colour. I thought this would match your eyes.’
‘Oh,
Eddie
.’ Right there in front of his Auntie Elsie and her sister she whispered his name in such a way that she knew she must have given herself away.
‘I would have bin back wi’ it before now, only we came up against Jerry’s torpedoes in the Atlantic. Did for another ship, they did, right in front of us. Poor sods on board never had a chance.’ Eddie shook his head, his eyes clouding over at the memory.
White-faced, Molly looked at him, everything she was feeling revealed in her expression.
‘How about me and you going to the pictures tomorrow night?’ Eddie asked her thickly.
‘Yes,’ Molly agreed quickly, at exactly the same time as June said a firm, ‘No.’
‘Don’t think I don’t know what’s going on,’ June warned Molly after Elsie and Eddie had gone, and they were alone together in their bedroom, getting ready for bed in the angry silence they had shared since Elsie had almost dragged her nephew out of
number 78’s kitchen. ‘I’m not daft, you know, and I wasn’t born yesterday. I’ve got two eyes in me head, our Molly, and I could see how you was looking at Eddie, so don’t you go thinking I couldn’t.’ June gave up any pretence of brushing her hair, throwing her hairbrush down on the bed and starting to pace the linoleum-covered floor.
‘Have you no shame? Looking at him like you wanted … and you engaged to someone else as well. I don’t know what’s got into you. And him bringing you that silk and saying it were the same colour as your eyes. Cheek of it, when he knows you’re engaged. As for you going to the cinema with him, you’re going nowhere with him, my girl.’
Molly had heard enough. She stood up to confront her sister. ‘Who says I’m not? You can’t tell me what to do, June. I love Eddie and he loves me, and just as soon as Johnny comes home I’m going to tell him that I don’t want to be engaged to him any more.’
For a moment there was silence and then June exhaled and said angrily, ‘You can’t do that.’
‘Yes, I can, and you can’t stop me,’ Molly retorted, repeating emotionally, ‘Me and Eddie love each other. You heard what he said about that other ship being torpedoed. That could have been him.’ Tears filled her eyes. ‘Who knows how long we might have together and I’m not going to give up a second of it.’
‘But what about Johnny?’
‘I never wanted to be engaged to Johnny in the
first place. It was always you who wanted it. This is my life and I’m going to live it my way!’
‘Well!’ June exclaimed, her mouth tightening as she turned her back on Molly and sat down on her bed.
She hated falling out with her sister, Molly admitted wretchedly, half an hour later, in the darkness of the bedroom she shared with June, her pillow already damp with her silent tears. But she was not going to give Eddie up. She was not! And she
was
going to the pictures with him tomorrow night, no matter what June said to try to stop her.
Only June didn’t say anything at all – not when they got up, not over breakfast, not one single word.
When their father asked what was going on, June told him bitterly, ‘You’d better ask
her
that question, Dad. Seeing as she’s the one who’s to blame.’
‘I don’t want to be engaged to Johnny any more, Dad,’ Molly admitted.
‘Well, I did say I thought you was too young.’
‘She hasn’t told you everything, Dad. She’s only got it into her head that she’s in love with Eddie from next door.’
Molly bowed her head.
‘Eddie’s a decent lad,’ her father pronounced, ‘but it’s bound to cause trouble if you go breaking your engagement with Johnny to tek up wi’ him, lass.’
‘That’s exactly what I told her,’ June announced triumphantly.
‘It’s all right for you,’ Molly stormed back, losing her temper. ‘You’re the one who made me get engaged to Johnny, even when I didn’t want to, just to suit your own ends, and it’s yourself you’re thinking about now, not me.’
June’s face burned a dull shade of angry red. ‘I suppose you’ve gone and told Eddie that, an’ all, have you? That it were me as wanted you to get engaged?’
‘What if I have? It’s the truth.’
‘Lassies, lassies,’ their father protested unhappily, but neither of them paid any attention. Hostility and anger had suddenly replaced sisterly love and loyalty.
‘I’m going to work,’ June announced, standing up and ignoring Molly.
‘I’m sorry, Dad,’ Molly muttered before going to get her own coat and trailing after her sister.
‘’Ere, Molly, there’s someone outside asking ter see yer,’ Ruby announced, bursting into the room excitedly ten minutes after the dinner bell had rung. ‘Said his name were Eddie.’
Immediately Molly’s face went bright pink whilst June glared furiously at her.
Ignoring her sister, Molly ran to the door and down the stairs.
Eddie was standing outside, watching the door anxiously. The moment he saw her he put out the cigarette he had been smoking and hurried over to her.
‘I’ve just come to tell you that I’ve had word that we’re sailing today.’
‘Oh, Eddie …’ Her elation was instantly replaced by a dull dread.
‘I didn’t want ter go wi’out saying goodbye proper, like,’ he told her, ‘although I’ve told me Auntie Elsie to tell you that I’d gone.’
Molly looked at him with helpless yearning, longing to beg him to stay with her, but knowing that she couldn’t. She was acutely conscious of the fact that the factory windows overlooked the small yard, and that no doubt if she were to turn round and look up, she would see the curious faces of her workmates looking down at her.
‘Might be gone a bit longer this time,’ he warned her, ‘but wi’ a bit o’ luck I’ll be home by Christmas.’
‘Christmas
!
’ Molly protested. ‘That’s weeks away!’
‘I want you to wear this for me.’ He reached into his pocket and brought out a fine chain supporting a small locket in the shape of a heart.
‘Oh, Eddie …’ Suddenly it didn’t matter any more who could see them. This moment and Eddie were far too important.
‘There’s nothing I’d like more than to give yer a proper ring, Molly, but that’ll have to wait until …’ They looked at one another, each knowing what the other was thinking.
Molly gave a small nod and told him quickly, ‘I’ll tell him as soon as he comes home.’
She could hardly bear it that he was leaving again so quickly, and on a sudden impulse she reached up on her toes and placed her lips against his, unable to let him go without physically showing him how much she loved him.
‘Aw, Molly …’ He hugged her so tightly she could hardly breathe, but that didn’t matter, not with the big solid warmth of him all around her, holding her.
‘I wish I could come down to the dock with you and see you off properly,’ she whispered.
‘Aye, well, best you don’t, not this time …’ cos if you did I might be tempted not to go.’
He kissed her quickly and then released her, leaving her to watch him walk away. When he got to the end of the road he turned round and waved.
The busy bustle when she walked back into the room, all the girls apparently engaged in what they were doing and carefully avoiding looking at her, told its own story, Molly realised guiltily as she picked up the cup of tea she had been drinking before Eddie had arrived and took a quick defensive sip, even though it had gone cold and tasted of tannin.
‘Well, I know what ter think when I see a girl who’s already engaged – and to one of our brave soldier lads – mekking up ter another fella as bold as brass without any shame in her,’ Irene announced condemningly to the room at large as she banged down her own cup and left the room,
quickly followed by several other girls, including, Molly saw, her own sister.
In the silence that followed Irene’s condemnation, Ruby came over to Molly and said sympathetically, ‘Don’t tek no notice of her, Molly. He looked a right ’andsome lad ter me.’
Hot tears filled Molly’s eyes.
Jean, who was still walking out with Eddie’s cousin Jim, looked uncertainly at her and then looked away as though not sure whether to sympathise with her or condemn her.
It was a relief when the bell rang, summoning them back to work. Molly was glad of the excuse her sewing gave her to keep her head bent over her machine.
‘Seein’ as how they’ve opened the Grafton Dance Hall up again, why don’t we go there this Saturday? I’m getting fed up of staying in every night,’ one of the girls called out above the noise of the machines.
‘Ooh, yes,’ Ruby agreed eagerly.
‘Well, it’s up to them as wants to go to mek up their own minds,’ Irene chipped in. ‘Not as most of us needs to guess who will want to go and who won’t. There’s some of us as has too much respect for them as we’re promised to and who won’t be here to want to go dancin’ whilst they’re fightin’, and then there’s some of us as doesn’t,’ she announced with a meaningful look at Molly. ‘And, of course, there’s them of us who wouldn’t want to be seen in public wi’ a girl
who’s bin seen kissing one lad whilst she’s engaged to another.’
There was no point in her trying to defend herself or to point out that less than two months ago Irene had been perfectly happy to go dancing without her fiancé. Molly knew that she had been tried and judged by her peers, and found guilty. Irene was making it very plain what she thought of her, and Molly was acutely aware of the cold looks she was receiving from several of the other girls, as they followed Irene’s lead. In a small enclosed society like theirs, where a young woman’s reputation reflected on her family and her friends, people were often quick to judge and then exclude those who broke the rules.
‘See what you’ve done? I hope you’re happy now,’ June hissed at Molly as they got off the bus and crossed the road, heading for home. ‘And to think I didn’t take that job at Napiers on account of me not wanting to leave you. I wish I had taken it now. It’ll be all over the cul-de-sac what you’ve done,’ said June angrily. ‘And what my Frank’s goin’ to say about it I don’t know! Proper shocked, he’s going to be. And as for his mam—’
‘If you don’t want me to be your bridesmaid any more then I won’t be,’ Molly cut across her angry outburst.
‘Oh, yes, and a fine lot of gossip that would cause, an’ all. It’s bad enough as it is, wi’ out making it any worse.’
As they turned into the cul-de-sac, a small group of women who lived there were chatting together, but they broke off their conversation to turn and look at the sisters.
Molly forced herself to smile at them, flushing hotly when none of them smiled back, and one of the women even went so far as to grab hold of her son’s hand and turn her back very deliberately on them.
‘Looks like they’ve heard already,’ June seethed.
They had almost drawn level with Frank’s mother’s house when unexpectedly the door opened and Doris Brookes came out to say sharply, ‘If you’ve got a minute, please, June.’
Giving Molly a bitter ‘I told you so’ look, June reluctantly followed her future mother-in-law into the house, leaving Molly standing alone outside.
While deliberating whether or not to wait for her sister, Molly saw Sally Walker coming towards her wheeling her pram. When she saw Molly she checked and looked as though she was about to cross the road to avoid her, but then she changed her mind and came up to her.
‘Well, Molly,’ she announced forcefully, ‘if what I’ve just been hearing from Pearl about you is true, I’m very disappointed in you. I never thought of you as the sort of girl who would do sommat like that. I’m grateful for you helping me when I was having me baby, but I can’t forgive you this.’
Without giving Molly the opportunity to say anything, she wheeled the pram past her.
It seemed that the whole world was against Molly as she hurried into the kitchen of number 78, relieved to escape the censorious scrutiny of her neighbours. What she had done
was
wrong, she knew that, but when she had allowed June to convince her to remain engaged to Johnny she had had no idea what falling in love would be like or how it would make her feel.
Tears filled her eyes and ran down her face to drip onto the draining board as she reached for the kettle.
‘Yoo-hoo …’
Molly shrank visibly as the kitchen door opened and Elsie came in, but she saw immediately from Eddie’s auntie’s face that she at least was sympathetically inclined towards her.
‘Eh, Molly love,’ she clucked, putting her arms round her and giving her a cuddle. ‘What’s to do?’
‘Everyone’s so angry with me because of me and Eddie, and me still being engaged to Johnny,’ Molly wept.
‘There, lass, don’t tek on so. Of course there’s them as disapproves – there’s bound to be. But for meself, there’s no one I’d sooner see married to our Eddie. I can see in yer eyes that you love him. Aye, and he loves you, an’ all. And as for young Johnny …’ she added, her voice taking on an unfamiliar note of disapproval.
‘What?’ Molly asked her uncertainly.
‘It’s not my place to say, and it’s perhaps only a bit o’ gossip anyways,’ Elsie announced, maddeningly
refusing to be drawn or to say any more, even though Molly pleaded with her to do so.
‘No. Least said, soonest mended, lass. So did our Eddie get ter see yer then?’
Molly nodded her head, happiness illuminating her expression as she remembered the sweetness of their goodbye.
‘Where’s your June?’
‘Frank’s mam asked her to go in.’
‘Aye, it’ll be about the weddin’, most like. I have heard as how Doris is worried that she’s going to be shown up in front of them posh friends of hers.’ Elsie gave an inelegant snort. ‘Well, I might not be able to boast that I’ve bin a ward sister, but everyone who knows me knows that me cookin’ is the best in the cul-de-sac, so she needn’t worry that them friends of hers will be turnin’ up their noses at it.’
Molly had to laugh, and she was still laughing a few seconds later when June came in, scowling darkly, taking her temper out on Molly as she declared, ‘I wouldn’t be laughin’, if I was you, Molly, because you haven’t got nowt to laugh about. I’ve just seen Sally Walker, and she was telling me about how shocked she was to hear what you’d bin up to. She says as how all the mothers in the cul-de-sac have taken right against you on account of it.’
‘Oh, leave ’er alone, do, June,’ Elsie defended Molly firmly. ‘Poor lass can’t help how she feels.’
‘You wouldn’t say that if it were your son she
were engaged to,’ June retorted. ‘Showing us up like that, and getting talked about behind our backs.’
‘What did Frank’s mam want then?’ Elsie asked June determinedly, whilst Molly held her breath, dreading hearing June say that her future mother-in-law had called her into her house to complain about Molly’s behaviour.
‘Oh, nowt much,’ June shrugged disinterestedly. ‘She only wanted to ask about the wedding and to have a bit of a go at me, an’ all, complaining that she hadn’t been consulted about anything.’
‘Aye, well, it’s natural that she should want to know what’s goin’ on,’ Elsie agreed cheerfully. ‘So would I, an’ all, if it were my lad as was marryin’. Luckily for me I’ll be living right next door when our Eddie weds Molly here,’ she added with a chuckle that brought an angry frown to June’s face.
‘Don’t you go encouraging her, Elsie,’ she stormed. ‘And I’ll thank you to remember that our Molly is engaged to Johnny.’
‘Aye, well, she might be now,’ Elsie answered her back, ‘but she won’t be for much longer, if what I’ve heard about him is true.’
‘And what does that mean?’ June demanded suspiciously.
Elsie shook her head. ‘Like I’ve already told Molly, I ain’t saying no more. I’m no gossip,’ she sniffed virtuously. ‘Unlike some folks about here.’
Once that comment would have been enough
to unite Molly and June in a shared grin of mutual understanding, but on this occasion June didn’t even bother to look at her, Molly acknowledged miserably, as Elsie left.