Giving It to the Monster (Saints and Sinners MC Book 4) (6 page)

“When you had no one, he was the one that made you feel alive, even if it was just a little bit,” Shannon said.

Elena started giggling. “I’m sorry, but you left Saint because you were scared of him becoming this kind of monster, and in turn you ended up with a monster?”

Natasha stared at Elena. “I was pretty stupid.”

“Stupid is not what I would call it,” Elena said.

“Elena,” Penny, Shannon, and Melissa said.

“What? I get it. Her asshole husband deserves everything that is coming to him, but please remember, Saint is my brother. She hurt him, and even I’ve seen a difference inside him since she came back. Saint is better than that other asshole, and yet instead of coming back home to Saint, she went with someone she didn’t even love.”

“Yeah, she’s right. I guess when I needed it most, he was there. I was the fool though, and Elena has every right to point it out. Saint is her brother, and he’s the better man. Look at what my choice of good guy did to me.” Natasha pointed at her fading bruises. “I came back to Sinners’ Corner. I came back to Saint.” Taking another large gulp of wine, she found her glass empty, and held it out for a top up. “This is probably going to sound crazy, but I sometimes felt like I deserved the hits from Simon.”

“What? Why?” Melissa asked.

The other women gasped and shook their heads. “Think about it. I never really committed to him. I didn’t even love him. I liked him. When he left, I didn’t wish to see him at the end of the day. I said ‘goodbye’, and ‘see you later’. If I didn’t see him for days at a time, and that happened, I wasn’t calling him, begging to know where he was. For the most part, we lived separate lives.”

“I couldn’t imagine doing that with Rage,” Penny said. “He’s always calling me. I miss him from the moment he walks out the door. I wonder about his day.”

“Me too, with Pipe.”

“I’m going to get some more wine,” Melissa said.

“I’ll help,” Natasha said, getting to her feet, and following the other woman out of the room. They walked into the kitchen, and Melissa opened the fridge showing an abundance of wine.

“I always make sure I have plenty for ladies’ night. I would have hired a stripper, but their men would kill me,” she said, laughing.

“You look a little uncomfortable. You okay?” Natasha asked.

Melissa stared at her, and then past her shoulder. “I don’t know. It’s complicated.”

“As complicated as me and Saint? Try me.”

Melissa nodded. “Okay, fine. I married Pea, and he provided protection for me and Penny. At the time, I knew we were not going to be faithful to one another. I was wild, and I liked variety, as did he. I thought he was attractive, and we promised each other, never to take a fuck to the next level, and to promise to talk if we started having feelings for someone else.”

“Wow,” Natasha said. “You agreed to this?”

“I wanted it. I was in my early twenties, marrying a man to help protect my younger sister. I wasn’t looking to just be with one man. I like Pea. He’s fun, and he was what I wanted.”

“Why do I feel a ‘but’ coming along?”

“But just recently something has changed. Like … Shannon. I like her. I also know that Pea has fucked her, and that she is a favorite because she likes it dirty.” Melissa paused, rubbing her fingers over her lips. “I don’t know. Shannon, she’s a good woman. Won’t ever try it on with another woman’s man.”

“She tried it on with Pea.”

“With the knowledge that I didn’t care. Sometimes I found it kind of hot to watch him, and he sometimes liked to watch me with different men. Back then I didn’t care. He could come and go as he pleased, and I wouldn’t say anything. Now, I like to know what he’s doing. He shares stuff with me, and I noticed that he comes home.” She laughed. “I’ve even been learning how to cook just so I can provide him a meal he actually likes.”

“That must be nice.”

“Yeah, it’s nice and it’s scary as fuck because, I’m actually in love with my husband, and I don’t even know if he likes me.” She laughed.

Natasha watched as tears filled the other woman’s eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

“No, this isn’t your fault.” Melissa waved her hand in front of her face, and took some deep breaths until the tears faded away. “I always believed I was doing the right thing, and now, I don’t know.”

“What is the right thing?”

“Marrying a guy I liked. Providing protection for myself and for Penny. Having the whole open marriage thing. It was kind of hot.” She held up her ring. “This didn’t mean anything to me. It was just a band that meant I belonged to Pea. Now, I worry that some woman, some club whore will give him something a lot more than me, and I’ll have to leave.”

“Have you talked to him?”

“No. I won’t talk to him about it. I can’t. I don’t want to be that woman that changes the rules after so long. I won’t scare him away.”

“But what if he’s feeling the same?”

“I don’t know, and you don’t know Pea. Anyway, enough of us being like baby girls. They’re wanting their wine.”

Natasha grabbed the bottle and entered the room, taking a seat. The conversation had changed to Emma and her upcoming fifth child. She listened while also wondering what Saint was doing. She doubted Shannon was the only club whore providing the club entertainment. Then her thoughts turned to Melissa. No one saw how troubled she was, or how much pain she was in. How long had she been feeling like this? Did Pea even have an idea?

You’ve got to stay out of it.

You don’t know a thing.

Sipping at her wine, she pushed all the other thoughts aside, and focused on the conversation, determined to have fun for once.

Chapter Five

“He’s working late,” Rage said.

Saint stared up at the office building that contained the man who thought he could hurt Natasha. He straddled his bike. He was there along with Pea, Vanilla, Buzz, and Willy who’d decided to come along last minute. Climbing off his bike, Saint made his way toward the front entrance. No one was around but a security guard.

“Sir, you shouldn’t be in here.”

“Got an appointment. Simon Meyer, which floor?”

“Wait a minute, this is after hours.”

Finding a plaque on the wall, he spotted Simon’s name, and made his way toward the elevator with his men right behind him.

“What’s the plan?” Rage asked.

“Try not to leave with a body bag.” He had his gun in the back of his jeans, but he was determined not to use it.

“Shame,” Vanilla said. “I’d have loved to take him apart piece by piece. No man should hit a woman.”

“You hit them for fun,” Willy said.

“I spank them, and I play. Whatever I do is all about pleasure. What this asshole did, it was all about power, and violence. That I don’t agree with.” Vanilla stared up at the light that was showing them the passing of each floor.

Pea started laughing. “I wonder what this fucker will think if you tied him down and spanked him, maybe even gave him a little dick action.”

Saint shook his head. “I don’t need to see that.”

“We could tie him up,” Willy said. “Take pictures.”

“You could compare your dick to his,” Rage said.

“Fuck off.” Saint’s dick would be bigger anyway. He didn’t need to beat a woman to feel powerful.

The elevator pinged open, and there waiting for him was Simon Meyer.

“Gentlemen, I take it this couldn’t have waited for another day.”

Saint didn’t say anything as he stepped off the elevator. He stared at Simon and didn’t like him. This man hit women, he hurt them, and he did it without care. Rage had found some of the women Simon liked to batter around. Once he finished with them, they were turned out in the street.

“Let me guess, is this where you tell me to be nice and quiet and give Natasha her divorce?”

Following Saint’s lead, none of his men spoke.

“I always knew there was someone else.” Simon laughed. “It’s you, isn’t it?”

Saint stared at the man, looking him up and down. “You’re going to give her a divorce.”

“You really think I am?” Simon patted his lip and smirked. “No, I’m not. So, seeing as you’re the guy from her past, the one her father was always crazy about, did she just lie there and take it?”

“Oh, he did not go there,” Rage said.

“This guy is looking for a fight.”

Saint ignored his men and stared at Simon, focusing on him.

“I just figured she was frigid. You know how some women can be. She had a nice tight pussy though. I loved it when she had a little fight in her, when she didn’t want it—”

Saint had heard enough. Reaching out, he grabbed Simon by his jacket, and slammed him up against the wall. “You really don’t want to be talking about shit you’ve done with Nat.”

“You can’t do this.”

“I don’t see anyone wanting to defend you. You’re on your own, asshole.” Saint pulled him away, and launched him across the room several feet. “Simon, we don’t know each other. I’m Saint, the Prez of the Saint and Sinners MC. I don’t take orders. I give them out. You’re telling me that you raped your own wife!”

Bending over the man, he saw the coward that Simon was.

“Low, fucking scum, and we’re supposed to look up to lawyers? They’re the problem with the world. End him, Saint,” Pea said.

Grabbing Simon’s hair, Saint pulled him up to his feet, and then slammed his fist into Simon’s face for good measure.

Saint was never one to fight dirty, so he kept picking Simon up, and gaining his attention. The desire to snap his neck was so damn strong. Instead, he kept hitting him until he knew he had to stop.

“You’re going to divorce Natasha, and you’re going to do it without causing a problem. She doesn’t want you.”

“Why should I?” Simon asked.

“Besides the ass kicking you’re going to get?” Rage asked.

“I’m going to be very clear,” Saint said, pulling a pistol out of his back pocket. “You’re not the first guy I’ve killed.” He opened the barrel to let him know that it was fully loaded, and pressed the nozzle against his forehead. Simon winced and tried to back away. Blood dripped from his nose, and bruises began to appear on his face. The dark place encompassed Saint, and he was able to focus on the man that was the problem. Everything fell away. Natasha’s face, the memory of his parents, even the love he had for Elena. It all faded to nothing as he stared at the man that needed to go.

“You’re going to get put away for this,” Simon said.

“Yeah, you and me both.”

“I don’t—”

“Cut the crap, Simon. I’ve got enough evidence to have you locked away. You get off on blackmailing women. Humiliating them so they have no choice but to make sure the case swings your way. As you know, proof is everywhere, you just got to find it. You send me down, I’ll take you down with me.” He ran the tip of the gun all around Simon’s face before thrusting it into his mouth. “I’d happily kill you right now, but that’s not going to solve my problems. Do you want to die, Simon?”

“No!”

Saint paused, pressing his finger a little, and Simon started to scream, to beg, and he pissed himself. From the stench he may have even shit himself as well. Curling his lip up, Saint wasn’t impressed. “You see, if I go down, you’ll go down. I’ve got enough shit on you to keep you locked up being someone’s bitch by the end of the week, Simon.”

“Oh, I could see it now,” Vanilla said. “Him strapped to a bed as they take it in turns to break in the newbie.”

Simon whimpered. “I’ll sign the divorce.” He muttered the words around the gun.

“That’s good to know. If a single cop comes to my door, I’ll hold you personally responsible.” Saint removed the gun and slapped Simon’s face. “Good man.”

He didn’t wait around.

Without saying another word, he walked onto the elevator with his men trailing behind him. Only when the doors slid close did his men speak.

“Why is he still walking?” Vanilla asked.

“What the fuck, Saint?” This was from Rage.

“Tonight wasn’t about killing him, but about sending him a message. I want him to divorce Natasha, and he has the chance to leave her and us alone. If not, then I will fucking kill him.”

“This makes no sense.”

I don’t want another death on my conscience.

“It doesn’t have to make sense to you.” He had to do it this way. Natasha had run from him once, and right now he wasn’t about to risk her running again.

“I get it,” Pea said.

He turned toward the one man he doubted would have gotten it.

“If you kill him now, she’ll know, and then you’ll be back to square one. Only this time, she may not come back.”

Saint gritted his teeth.

“Prez?” Rage asked.

“To Natasha, I’m nothing more than a monster.” He’d never opened up like this to anyone. Apart from talking to Rage a few months ago, this was going beyond anything he’d ever said. “If her husband suddenly turned up dead, what do you think would happen? She’d run.”

“You don’t want her to run?” Vanilla asked.

“No, I don’t.” He wanted her to stay in Sinners’ Corner. “She knows I’m not a good man, and that I’ve done things that would scare her, but I also know I’m a better man than that fucker out there. I’d never hurt her, and with Dad gone, I’ve turned this club into something worth bragging about.”

“You may not think it, but we can all help you,” Pea said. “Other than Ralf, no one has gone missing.”

“Let’s keep it that way.”

“We still waiting on Ethan?” Vanilla asked, changing the subject.

“He’s breaking the shit down, and then analyzing it,” Saint said. He didn’t understand the process, and probably never would.

Once outside, they straddled their bikes, and headed back to Sinners’ Corner. It was late, and they all made their way toward Pea’s house to see the damage that Melissa had caused. Ladies’ night always ended badly. Rage couldn’t sleep without Penny. Knife always wanted Sarah, and Pipe wouldn’t rest without Elena in his arms.

What did surprise him was Pea speeding toward the house. Usually on ladies’ night he spent time at the club, balls deep in one of the women there. This time, he was heading home.

Interesting.

Parking his bike on the drive, Saint followed Pea toward the house. At least they didn’t have to pry the women apart to get them to open the door.

Vanilla was there, probably to take Shannon back home.

The moment they entered the door, Saint heard giggling, and when he rounded the corner of the house to the living room, he saw them all attempting to play Twister. Several bottles were on the floor, empty.

Melissa had fallen on top of Natasha, and they were both giggling like schoolgirls.

“Vanilla,” Shannon said, squealing, and throwing herself into his arms. “I missed you.” She puckered her lips.

“Oh no, Daddies are home,” Melissa said. “Time to go back home so you don’t be late to school.”

“Pipe,” Elena said. “I drank a little too much!” She slurred her words, but Saint just smiled. His sister wasn’t his responsibility.

“I think tonight we’re going to be making baby number three,” Pipe said, smirking.

Elena sighed. “Probably.”

In the next second they were gone.

“Hey, Saint,” Natasha said, her eyes a little glazed over.

“Are you ready to go home?” he asked.

She closed her eyes and moaned. “Home, I love that. Home. I always thought I’d have a home with you.”

He leaned down, picking her up, and she wrapped her arms right around his neck. “You always do.” He whispered the words so that only she could hear.

“I like you.”

“Are you able to hold onto me on the bike?” he asked.

“Yep!” She gave him a hard squeeze, and then laughed as if it was the funniest thing she’d ever done.

“Come on. I’ll ride slow.”

“I know how good you can be when you’re slow.”

He left everyone alone as he made his way outside. This time he didn’t try to get the helmet on her head. He simply climbed on the bike as she straddled the machine, holding onto his tightly. She pressed her face against his neck, inhaling hard. “God, I miss your smell. You always smelled so good, Saint. Like home, only better.”

His dick thickened, and for a second he closed his eyes, and begged for strength not to bend her over and fuck her.

No, there wasn’t going to be any sex between them while she was drunk. He was going to be the better man. The good man. The man that she had always wanted him to be.

“Do you remember what it was like between us, Saint?”

“I’ve never forgotten.”

“Me neither. I was no good with Simon. He was a total ass, and he had a small dick. Thought I should worship him, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t bring myself to be so open with him. It’s all my fault.”

“Him being a prick is not your fault.”

“Leaving Sinners’ Corner was my fault. I left you, and I left our future. In my world, in my head, there has never been anyone as good as you. I never stayed still for you. I never froze, or flinched from your touch. I always do that with him.”

Saint didn’t know what to say, so he said nothing.

“I love being around you, Saint. Even when you’re moody, just like that first day. You make me want to try harder. I always want to make you smile, and to see that you are happy. I ruined that because I ran without looking back. I should have looked back.”

He pulled up outside of his own home, and waited for her to climb off. Saint got off just in time to catch her as she stumbled away.

“Whoops, you’re always catching me. Always making sure I do the right thing.” She held onto his arms, and smiled up at him. “Did you miss me while I was away?”

“More than anything.”

Tears filled her eyes. “I wanted to come home so many times, Saint. I was scared. I was scared of what I’d find, what you’d become. Then I was afraid that you’d move on, and I have no right to think like that. He was a monster, and he was ruining you. Ruining us. He was always getting in the way, and I hated him for it. What I hate more is that I listened to him. This is all my fault.”

“I’d have never let that happen.”

She sniffled. “He told me to leave so many times. Told me that I was a distraction, and you were going to get killed. I didn’t want you to die, Saint. He even tried to pay me to leave once. Your father tried to make me leave, but I was so stubborn to start off with.”

“Nat,” Saint said. He hadn’t known that.

“Your father hated me. He wanted me to go, and I walked away. I never took any money from him though. I just left, and hoped you’d survive. I failed us, Saint. Not you. Not anyone else,
I
did. I was too damn weak to keep on fighting him, and I left us. Can you ever forgive me?”