Gifts and Consequences (23 page)

Everyone but Angela nodded and Molly said, “I’m as loose as a goose.  I’m more limber than timber.”  She performed a couple of fake stretches to drive her point home.

“Let’s hit the trail,” said Heather.

It sounded like a prison sentence to Porter.  Molly and Mack quickly fell in line, with Molly doing an exaggerated march cadence. 

Porter picked up Angela’s water pack.  “C’mon,” he said, “let’s at least start.  It’s just walking.”

Angela swore under her breath and let him assist her into the Camelbak.  The trainers didn’t slow or look back at the lagging pair, so they were forced to jog to catch up.  Once they were with the group they slowed to a reasonable pace.  The hike was going to be an all day ordeal so the trainers set a tempo everyone could keep.

Heather addressed the group, talking about the life-changing experience of cresting the peak.  She made the same points Molly had been reciting all morning. 

She finished by saying, “I know it’s hard.  I know you want to quit.  I know what each of you is going through.  This is exactly what you need to put your obesity behind you.”

Angela spoke up between her heavy breathing, “You have no idea what we’re going through.  Have you ever weighed over 300 pounds?  Have you ever wanted a pizza so bad you would eat it even if it was covered with rat crap?  Did you have to buy a ticket for each butt cheek last time you flew?”  She stopped and breathed heavily with hands on her hips, then hissed, “Don’t tell me you know.”

Heather called a break.  Everyone except Molly found somewhere to sit.  Molly breathed deeply and said, “I can feel the weight just melting off.”

Heather backtracked to where Angela stood and said, “I know this—today will change your life.  Make it to the top,” she pointed up the mountain, “and you will never be the same.”  She turned and walked back to where Amy waited.

The break lasted only a few minutes.  Amy and Heather led the way up the mountain with Molly and Mack right behind them.  Porter and Angela brought up the rear.  With every step her grumbling increased, wearing on Porter’s resolve.

“A week of torture and I only lost nine pounds,” complained Angela.  “At that rate it would take four months to get the weight off.  And that’s working out twenty hours a day and eating a hundred calories a meal.  I just can’t live like that.”

Porter didn’t respond.  He lost fourteen pounds the first week, bringing him down to 451.  At the impossible pace the camp set it would take him over three months to reach his target weight.  Not the weight that posters said someone his height should weigh, but the weight he felt he could live with—the weight he and the stranger had agreed on.  Fourteen weeks of torture.

Angela continued between huffing breaths.  “I know I’ll live longer, but why would I want to live if it has to be like this?  I’d rather be happy for two years than miserable for fifty.”

Again Porter had no argument.  He wiped the sweat from his brow, took a gulping swig from his water pack and glanced up at the top of the mountain.  A saddle dipped between two peaks.  That was their goal, and it looked just as far away as it had forty-five minutes earlier.  It would have been better if the summit wasn’t visible.  Then he wouldn’t be able to see it not getting any closer.

Ten minutes later, one grueling step after another, they reached a sign that read “Mile 1”.  Molly cheered and Porter asked for a break.

“Not yet,” answered Amy.  “Whenever you reach a milestone, push just a little past it.  The strength you build that way is amazing.”

On they trekked.  The road got steeper and the grasses were replaced by gravel.  The pace slowed but the group still didn’t rest.  Porter’s muscles no longer cried out in agony.  Now it was his lungs.  The burning in his legs was nothing compared to the lack of oxygen.

Angela slipped and slid back a foot or two on her knees and forearms.  She was panting too hard to even cry out.

“Heather!” Porter shouted, dropping back to Angela’s side.

Heather jogged back to them and removed the first aid kit from the pack on her waist.  Dirt covered Angela’s sweaty arms and legs.  There were a few dark spots of blood on her knees and elbows. 

Once the dirt was washed away, Porter saw Angela only had minor scrapes, three of which were barely bleeding.  Nothing broken or sprained.  A few Band-Aids and she was all fixed.  “I can’t do it,” she told Heather.

“Can’t or won’t?” asked Heather.  Not giving her time to respond she said, “We’ll break here.  You’ll be ready by the time we get back on the trail.”

The sun beat down from directly overhead.  The four teammates could have filled a kiddie pool with sweat.  Porter and Angela sat together, leaning forward, heads down, sucking wind. 

“I’m not going,” Angela said to Porter, shaking her head.

“Why not try it?  I’ll stay behind with you.  No one said we had to keep up with the Wonder Twins.”

Angela looked at him, considering, but didn’t say anything.

“You can go home tomorrow if you still want to.” 

Angela looked down at her hands.

“I don’t think I can do it without you,” said Porter.

“Uh-uh,” said Angela.  “I’m not doing it for anyone else anymore.  This isn’t the life I want, Porter.  I’m not an angry person, but this lifestyle is making me into a monster.  I want to be happy, what’s more important than that?”

“Just finish the hike,” Porter pleaded.  “At least then you can get a fifty percent refund if you leave.” 

Porter didn’t care about the money, since he hadn’t paid a dime.  The stranger was bankrolling the ranch for as long as Porter stayed and made progress.  The downside was if he left before reaching 299 pounds the man said he would make sure Porter gained a hundred pounds.

Angela shook her head.  “I don’t care about the money.  I care about being happy and this does not make me happy.”

Porter didn’t know what to say so he said nothing.  A slight breeze cooled his brow.

“Are
you
happy, Porter?”  She poked him in the shoulder.  “Is this really what
you
want?”

He didn’t dare answer.

“It’s time for other people to stop telling you how to live your life.  You have to do what makes you happy.  If they don’t like staring at our fat asses they don’t have to, but I’m done doing what they want me to do.”  With effort she stood.

The rest of the group, seeing her stand, got to their feet and turned up the trail.

Angela looked down at Porter, who still sat thinking.  “It’s not about them, Porter.  It’s about you.”  She walked down the trail.

Porter stood and looked at the backs of the people walking away.  Angela finally moved freely, not having to fight gravity.  Mack and Molly trudged, one foot in front of the other, toward the impossibly far peak.  Seeing the difference in the amount of effort they exerted didn’t encourage him.

Amy looked over her shoulder and saw Angela retreating.  She stopped and yelled down the mountain, “If you don’t do the Big Hike you’ll have to leave the camp.”

Angela waved goodbye over her shoulder without slowing.

“Your fees are non-refundable until tomorrow,” added Heather.

Angela shrugged.

“You’re going to have to look at your fat self in the mirror every day for the rest of your life,” said Amy.

“I can deal with it if you can,” yelled Angela.

“You’ll never succeed if you walk away!” Heather added in a final attempt to get her to stop.

Angela didn’t bother answering; she just extended both arms and gave them the finger with both hands.

“C’mon, Porter,” said Amy.  “Let the quitter go.”

Porter looked up, then down.  One last look at the far away peaks then he turned and started downhill.

“It’s not about them, it’s about me,” he repeated out loud to cover the trainers’ shouts.  “It’s not about them, it’s about me.” 

He caught up with Angela.  The relief on her face was a mirror of the relief he felt. 

Part III

September

The apartment manager held the key high for effect and dropped it into Lisa’s outstretched hand.  She hoped he didn’t notice the tremble in her hands.

A key.  Her key.  A symbol of her new freedom.  Charlie held up his hand to give her five, but she brushed past it and enclosed him in an embrace that he eagerly returned. 

The manager left them alone.  Lisa spun and admired her new home.  It was smaller than the old apartment, only one bedroom.  But it was hers.  Not Buck’s.  And it wasn’t tainted with his memories.

The Salvation Army truck would be at the other apartment later to pick up her old belongings.  Everything except the gun; it lay at the bottom of the Buffalo River.  Nobody knew about the gun.  Not even Charlie. 

Lisa wasn’t bringing any furnishings to the new place.  Not her ancient computer (all her files fit onto a thumb drive), not the condiments from the fridge, not so much as a single spoon.  The apartment had all the furniture she needed, and even allowed pets.  It was worth the extra fifty dollars a month.   

In the six weeks since she opened her own bank account, her life had been one success after another.  She had obtained a driver’s license, transferred her mom’s trust to her own name, reinstated her ward of the state stipend and even registered for college.  In just two weeks, she, Lisa Knapp, would be a freshman at Erie Community College.

And she couldn’t have done any of it without Charlie.

“Two hours ‘til the Salvation Army guys show up at the old place,” he said.  “Wanna get some groceries?  Deodorant?  Toothpaste?”

Lisa sniffed at her armpit area without lifting her arm.  It didn’t smell too bad.  There was no way to check her own breath.

“No,” said Charlie, realizing what he’d implied.  “I just mean food and toiletries and girl stuff.”

“Charlie,” said Lisa.  She blushed in layers.

Charlie looked mortified.  “I was talking about brushes and shampoo, not…you know what, I’m going to stop talking now.”

“That’s probably a good idea,” said Lisa.  When Charlie started digging a hole, he didn’t use a shovel—he used a tractor.  “I want to get Oliver, show him his new home.  Then go get some sheets.”

“Too bad the Salvation Army won’t just trade the old stuff for new stuff.  Well, new-to-you stuff.” 

It had taken some work, but Lisa had finally convinced Charlie of the merits of thrift store shopping.  He had never been in a Salvation Army, Goodwill, or any other thrift store until she had taken him.

They figured she could stock the amenities that weren’t already furnished for under $700, including a used computer.  That was about ten percent of her bank account balance.  With the state aid she was entitled to and the rest of her trust fund she could live, and afford school for eight years.  Not that she was looking that far in the future. 

Once she let it sink in, the thought of college was much more comforting than working and being a real adult.  The community college would be like an extension of high school.  And she had made it through high school.

Lisa didn’t expected her recent luck to last that long.  But instead of cringing and hiding from her cursed life she decided to go after it full steam ahead.  Better to speed toward her fate and get it over with.  She didn’t know how, but she knew it would all come crashing down.  Maybe her money would run out unexpectedly.  Or Charlie would turn out to be abusive, or maybe he was taking a cruel joke way too far.

It didn’t matter what happened as long as it didn’t involve Buck.  The negative possibilities involving him were endless.  A police investigation about his disappearance… His gun used in a crime and somehow traced to her…Him simply showing up…

Lisa didn’t think any of those would happen.  It would be something much more unexpected and somehow even more horrible.  But until it did happen she would make an honest effort to enjoy her perfect life.  There were limitless ways for her world to implode, but she couldn’t think of a single way it could be any better.

Hand in hand Lisa and Charlie walked toward the front door, but before they reached it she heard a knock.  Probably just the manager.

Lisa paused at the door.  “My first time answering my own door,” she said with a proud grin.

When the door opened it was not the manager.  A middle-aged man with black hair and tired eyes stood in front of her.

Lisa had never seen him before, but shock registered on Charlie’s face and he involuntarily muttered, “No.” 

His expression told her everything—her perfect life was over.

That didn’t take long
, Lisa thought and her eyes fell to the ground.

The details weren’t important.  Whatever this stranger had to say was going to derail everything Lisa had worked for.  At least she’d been expecting it.