Gift of Gold (12 page)

“Jonas, sometimes I don’t understand you.”

“You will soon enough. Don’t think about the future, sweetheart. Just think about the here and now. It’s all we need tonight.”

He shoved the gown down over her hips, letting it fall into a pool at her feet. His gaze roved over her as she stood nude before him.

His hands followed the trail of his gaze, scorching her skin as he explored the small valley between her breasts and the curve of her waist. Then his fingers went lower, tangling lightly in the dark red curls at the juncture of her thighs. The heat in him assailed her, summoning forth a torrent of damp fire between her legs. When his fingertips brushed through that liquid fire, Verity thought she would collapse. All the strength seemed to be gone from her limbs.

“Jonas, I can hardly stand.”

“I know. I feel the same way. You don’t know what you’re doing to me. You’re so wet and hot. Why the hell did we wait this long?”

Verity gave a small, shaky laugh and clung to his shoulders. “We haven’t waited long at all. Jonas, we hardly know each other.”

“Not true.” His fingers glided around to her hips. He squeezed her gently and then he picked her up and carried her down the short hall to her small bedroom. “I know you better than you think and soon you’re going to know all you need to know about me.”

He put her down in the center of the small bed and his hands went to the buttons of his shirt. He stripped the garment off with ruthless energy while he stepped out of his low boots, and he tugged at the button of his jeans. He yanked the pants off along with his briefs and a moment later he was standing naked beside the bed.

Verity looked up at him, her eyes full of feminine wonder. The shadows in the room concealed the details of his arousal but gave hints of the broad planes of his shoulders and chest. Silhouetted against the pale glow of the window he seemed very large and very male. “You’re strong,” she murmured, trailing questing fingertips along his taut thigh. “Strong and hard.”

“Harder than I’ve ever been in my life,” he agreed with a groan as he came down beside her on the bed. “I feel like I’m going to explode. I need to be inside you more than I need my next breath. Open for me, honey.  Let me touch you.”

She felt his hands on the insides of her thighs, prying apart her legs. Verity was suddenly aware of her own vulnerability. Things were going much too fast, she realized. She needed a little time.

“Wait,” she begged as he anchored her resisting leg with his own heavy thigh and began to explore her with increasing intimacy. “Please, Jonas. Not so fast.”

He leaned over her and kissed one peaked breast. “But you’re ready for me, sweetheart.” His fingertips found the tiny bud of desire that lay sheltered in the curls below her waist. When he stroked it lightly, Verity gasped and lifted herself against his hand. “You see?” he said with soft satisfaction. “You’re more than ready. My hand is damp from touching you. You’re slick and moist and welcoming. Honey, I can’t wait. Don’t ask me to go slowly tonight. I’m desperate for you.”

She closed her eyes as her body responded to his touch. Behind her lids she expected to see some fantasy generated by the fever of desire pulsing through her. But what she saw was an endless dark corridor. Once more she was running from an unseen pursuer and once more she was convinced that pursuer had eyes of ancient gold.

Verity froze and frantically lifted her lashes, willing the vision to pass. “Jonas, I’m scared.”

“Not of me. You can’t be frightened of me.” He raised his head and looked down at her as he felt the new rigidity in her body. “I won’t let you be scared of me.”

“Wait, please, I need to think. I can’t get something out of my head. Something that happened earlier when you picked up the gun. It’s been bothering me and I want to…”

He interrupted her with a harsh exclamation. “Don’t think about that now. Think about me. Think about us. I’m going to make you forget what happened earlier. Look at me, Verity. Open your eyes, dammit, and
look at me.
”

He loomed over her, parting her legs with his own, caging her within his hands, blocking out the moonlight. Verity looked up at him, her whole world suddenly narrowed down to her tiny bedroom and the man who dominated it.

Once more the fierce sensual need swept through her. She did want him. This
was
the right man. There was no need to fear Jonas.

Verity was poised on a sharp blade of desire. She could not stay teetering on the brink for long. The tension was too great. It would tear her apart. She must either pull back now, this instant, or she must hurl herself forward into the darkness.

“Hold on to me, sweetheart,” Jonas whispered, the words raw. “Just put your arms around me and hold on to me. Take me inside you. We’ll both be safe then.”

She wanted to tell him again that she did not understand but instead she clung to him. She held him tightly, passionately aware of the strength in him, wanting that strength for herself. When he slid one hand under her buttocks, lifting her, she gripped him so fiercely that she knew she must be leaving marks with her nails.

Jonas sucked in his breath under the impact of the small punishment Verity was delivering and then he pushed himself against her. She felt the thick, broad head of his shaft probing the opening to her body and once more she tried to think clearly for a few seconds. He needed to know that this was new to her. He needed to know he should go slowly now.

“Jonas, listen to me. I want to tell you something.”

“You can tell me later,” he promised, and then he surged heavily into her.

Verity lost her breath for a few frantic seconds. When she regained it she cried out a soft, wordless protest.

She was totally unprepared for the size of him and the suddenness with which he had penetrated her. She was not naïve. She had thought she had a fairly good idea of what to expect when she made love for the first time. But this burning, stretched, invaded sensation was definitely not it.

It was Jonas’s turn to freeze as Verity’s body clenched in protest around him and her nails dug angrily into his skin. “Verity?” he got out thickly. “Verity, what the hell is going on?”

She had anticipated a feeling of fullness, perhaps a little initial discomfort until her body adjusted to the new experience. But this incredible, painful tightness was too much. Verity pushed at Jonas’s broad shoulders.

“That’s enough,” she gasped. “Stop it, Jonas. Now.” She was accustomed to giving him orders and she expected to be obeyed.

But Jonas didn’t move. His face was a mask of iron control, but he didn’t move. “Honey, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I didn’t realize. Dammit, it’s too late now. Just relax. Take it easy. You’re too tense. You’re hurting yourself.”

“I am not hurting myself,” she said between set teeth as she continued to shove at him. “You’re the one who’s hurting me. Get off. I told you you were going too fast, but you wouldn’t listen. Men. You’re all so sure you know what you’re doing.”

“You didn’t tell me why you wanted me to slow down,” he defended himself. He was vibrating with tension as he fought to hold himself unmoving within her and at the same time keep her pinned carefully beneath him. The muscles of his back and thighs were as contoured steel. His forehead was damp.

“I didn’t know a simple request for gentlemanly restraint required a detailed explanation!”

“Verity, calm down. It’s too late. I made a mess of things. I’ll apologize later, I swear. But it’s too late to stop now. You’re okay, sweetheart. Just stop fighting yourself and me, too. Let yourself relax. It’s going to be all right. It’s going to be so damn good. You’ll see. You’re going to want me as much as I want you. I know there’s passion in you.” His lips were warm and soothing on her throat. Then he kissed the curve of her shoulder. “Please, honey. Let yourself relax.”

The desperation in his words got through to her. Verity breathed deeply, trying to rally her scattered senses. There was nothing really wrong with her, she decided objectively. It was infuriating to hear him say it, but logically she knew Jonas was right. She would undoubtedly be much more comfortable if she let herself relax.

What was happening wasn’t Jonas’s fault, she reminded herself grimly as she slowly retracted her nails from his shoulder. She always took responsibility for her own actions and there was no denying she had wanted this lovemaking. She had been longing to throw herself into bed with Jonas since he had kissed her in the spa; perhaps even before that. Maybe from the first time she’d seen him. She couldn’t blame him if she stumbled her first time out of the gate. Deliberately she tried to unclench her strained muscles.

“That’s it. You’re doing great. You’re going to be doing a whole lot better in a few minutes, believe me.” Jonas muttered encouragement as she stopped trying to shove him off of her. His hands were clamped around her arms, his body still taut as he dropped more reassuring kisses across her breasts and into the hollow of her shoulder.

Verity licked her dry lips. “Maybe…maybe we’re not physically compatible. You feel much too large and I don’t seem to be feeling whatever it is I’m supposed to be feeling. Maybe we both made a mistake.”

He made a small, husky sound that was part laugh and part groan: “No mistake. You’re perfect for me. Trust me. Just hang on and trust me.”

He slid his hand down her side to her hip and then he wedged one tapered finger between their bodies. Verity twisted slightly as he found the tiny nubbin of desire. When he began to tease it gently, she sighed and twisted again, arching upward against his hand. Pleasure began to replace the too-tight, too-stretched, too-invaded feeling.

“Better?” he whispered as she moved beneath him.

“I may survive after all.” She flexed her fingers on his shoulders but this time she didn’t dig her nails into him. Experimentally she lifted her hips and felt him move an inch or so within her. The sensation was interesting, she decided. She tried it again.

Jonas sucked in his breath. “I’m glad you think you’ll survive. I’m not sure I will.”

He began to move carefully within her as her body unclenched and began to turn soft around him. Slowly, with exquisite care, he measured the length of her feminine sheath, filling her to the hilt and then withdrawing slightly. “Oh, Christ, Verity. You’re so warm and tight,” he grated. “I’ve never felt anything like this. So perfect.”

“Jonas?” She sighed his name in a half-spoken question as a tingling, liquid heat began deep inside her.

“Honey, I’m trying to take this slow and easy but I don’t think I can last much longer. I’m going out of my mind.” He drew a savage breath and removed his hand from between their bodies. Then he gripped her with sudden fierceness, driving himself into her with increasing urgency.

The tingling feeling increased. Verity tightened herself around Jonas, seeking more of the delightful sensation. Instinctively she wrapped her legs around his hard hips and her lower body strained to hold him within her.

“
Verit
y.
”

She felt Jonas lose what was left of his self-control. With one last agonized groan, he surged deeply into her and went rigid. His muffled shout of satisfaction filled the room.

Time hung suspended for a few moments before Jonas sagged heavily on top of Verity, his head on her breasts.

For a long time Verity lay trapped beneath his weight, her hands moving on his back, unconsciously stroking him as she would a cat. She looked up at the ceiling and smiled vaguely to herself. She knew enough to realize that things hadn’t gone perfectly. She had missed out on something important, but she felt strangely contented nonetheless. There was a sweet satisfaction and pleasure in knowing that Jonas had been satisfied. And common sense warned her that first times for anything seldom went exactly right. Practice made perfect, and she was determined to practice.

Jonas was silent for a long moment, apparently enjoying the soothing feel of her hand. Then, with a low, lazy sigh, he eased himself out of her and rolled to one side. He gathered her against him and kissed her ear.

“You should have told me this was going to be new for you,” he chided gently.

“The subject never arose. I didn’t expect everything to happen so quickly. I thought I’d have weeks, maybe months to get to know you and be sure.”

“Really? Do you think I could have waited even a few more days, let alone weeks or months?” He squeezed her rounded buttock. “Don’t you know what you’ve been doing to me ever since I first saw you?”

Verity smiled dreamily against his chest. “What have I been doing to you?”

“Driving me wild. Verity, you’re twenty-eight years old. Why in hell did you wait this long to go to bed with a man?”

She shrugged unconcernedly. “Haven’t you heard? There’s a man shortage.”

“Don’t give me that bull. Why, Verity?”

“It never seemed right before,” she said with simple honesty.

He pulled away so that he could see her face. His eyes searched her expression. “And it felt right with me?”

“Mmm.” She tried to snuggle closer, hungry for the warmth of him.

But Jonas continued to hold her where she was, his face intent. “Honey, I want you to know you won’t regret it.”

“Good. I never did believe in useless regrets. When do we do it again?”

He laughed, the sound deep and husky in the darkness. “I should have known you’d be a tyrant in bed as well as out of it. Serves me right, I guess.” He tangled his fingers in the jumbled mass of her hair. “You know, you remind me of someone.”

“A former girlfriend?” Verity was not pleased.

Jonas shook his head. “Nope. Not a former girlfriend. It’ll come to me one of these days.”

“And in the meantime?” she asked invitingly. She wriggled her toes along his leg.

“I’ll be damned. I’ve created a monster.” Jonas’s grin was wicked as he released her with a proprietary slap on her rear and climbed out of bed. “Stay where you are.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’ll be right back,” he promised, disappearing into the small bathroom.

Verity saw the light come on behind the half-closed door and heard water running in the sink. Idly she stretched beneath the sheet, taking inventory of the tiny aches and pains that were the silent protest of formerly unused muscles. She felt languid and happy, eager to explore the wonderful feeling of closeness she had just discovered with Jonas.