Getting Played (11 page)

What Lies Beneath

I never did do my homework last night. After that stupid phone call, I just laid back until I eventually fell asleep. I was fully dressed and the lights were still on when I woke up. So now it's lunchtime and I have exactly twenty minutes to read these chapters and answer the questions. I decide to hit the school library so I can concentrate. It's basically where all the nerd and computer geeks hang out reading comic books and talking computer stuff. Which translates to mean they're hiding and trying to avoid getting beat down. I figured it didn't matter since they'd be in their world and I'd be in mine.

So I am sitting in one of the back areas of the library trying to avoid drama, and don't you know drama comes right over and sits down right next to me. Well, not actually
next to me, but close enough. Drama is standing two aisles over and right behind where I'm sitting.

At first I'm not paying any attention to what they are saying. I figure it is either some horny couple wanting to do their thing in semiprivate or a couple of idiots reading out loud. Then they kinda get louder, 'cause now they are almost arguing. It sounds like it is two guys and a girl and it takes me a few minutes to figure out what they are talking about. They are bragging about how they broke in someplace and how they are planning on doing it again this weekend. My jaw drops. My mouth is wide open. I can't believe what I am hearing. The first thing I think about is when Ursula told me the police were questioning students about the break-ins in the neighborhood.
Oh, shit.
I seriously should not be here right now, if they see me…

Then, even though my cell was on vibrate, it still makes a noise. Somebody is calling me. I grab it and stuff it in my pocket. Apparently they didn't hear it because they just keep right on talking. I don't really recognize any of the voices. But I know if I stay they'd know I was there and heard them talking. There is only one way out of the back area and one way in. I quickly gather my stuff and ease around the table. Just then, a couple of other students come running through the aisle laughing and throwing something between them.

The conversation ends abruptly and one of the guys comes out from behind the stacks. Peeking through the books, I see who it is, but at the time he doesn't see me. The two kids playing around run past me and bump right into him. A slight shoving match begins as threats of bodily injuries
are leveled. “What the hell are you doing back here, punk?” Boyce demands. Neither one of the two guys responds. They look like ninth graders and I swear they are about to pee their pants. They are petrified. But hell, I would be, too. It was Boyce. “I asked you a question, bitch,” he adds.

One kid starts crying, and the other mumbles something I can't hear. They are both scared to death. “Damn right, nothing. Now get your asses out of here before I kick 'em,” he demands.

Boyce is focused on threatening the two kids, so I turn around and pretend like I am just getting there. I try to ignore what was going on by quickly sticking my earbuds in my ears. I sit down and open my
Great Gatsby
book, ignoring everybody. But for real I am scared, too. See, this is why I hate this place.

Everybody eventually leaves. They ignored me, thank God. So I stay there the rest of the period. My earbuds are locked in, but my music is off. I still don't do my homework. I am looking around at the shelves of books and wondering what the hell I am doing here. This isn't my school and this isn't my world.

My cell rings again. I look at the caller ID, but don't answer since most people usually have sense enough not to call me during school hours. It reads, “Private Caller.” My heart jumps. Yeah, there is definitely no way I am answering. I turn my phone all the way off and stick it in the bottom of my bag. A few seconds later, the bell rings. I almost jump out of my skin. Two more classes and the day will be over. But hell, it is only Wednesday.

I leave the library and head to English Lit. I still didn't
do my homework. It's no big deal since our teacher doesn't even collect it and just tells us to use it as a study guide for an upcoming test. My last class is Chemistry. The teacher is crazy. He jokes the whole time we're there. We study the periodic table and periodic law. Believe it or not, I really like the class.

By the end of the day, I am through. I don't go to my locker since I'm really not up for dealing with Troy and his boys. I don't have to work, so I go home and just chill out online with my girls. We instant message each other for about forty minutes and then my cell phone rings. I look at the caller ID. I tell my girls I'll catch up with them later and then answer. “Hello.”

“Hey, it's me,” Terrence says.

“I know, hi,” I say, a little shocked by the phone call.

“What's up?”

Seriously, how do I answer that question? But he doesn't wait for an answer. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. “I heard you got a job at Giorgio's,” he says. Of course I knew Gia told him. Who else would?

“Yeah, yesterday was my first day.”

“How was it?”

“It was a lot harder than I thought it would be,” I say honestly. “There's a lot of running around and filling things up and whipping things off. I made about a million French fries.” He starts laughing. The sound of his laughter reminds me of better times when we used to hang out together.

“Yeah, I remember that part,” he says.

“What do you mean, you remember it? How?”

“I worked at Giorgio's a couple of years ago. He still calls me in if he gets really jammed up and I'm available.”

“I didn't know you worked there before.”

“There're a lot of things you don't know about me.”

“Yeah, I guess I'm starting to see that,” I say. “I saw Gia last night. She was there with some of her friends. She told me you were in some kind of trouble. So what's going on? Is this trouble what you never want to talk to me about?” I ask. The line goes silent for a while. “Are you still there?”

“Yeah, I'm here. Gia shouldn't have said anything to you.”

“She didn't. She just said you got messed up. She didn't elaborate. Are you gonna tell me what's going on, what you told her?” I say, emphasizing the last word.

“It's no big deal. I'm taking care of it.”

“So you're still not gonna tell me.” Again the line goes quiet. I know he is still there this time. “Fine,” I say.

“Look, don't worry about it, it's over.”

“Okay,” I say. He obviously isn't going to tell me, so I let it drop, again. “So, how'd you know I was working? Gia tell you we talked?”

“Nah, Li'l T told me.”

I smile to myself. “Figures, he knows everything about everybody. I wanted to tell you myself, but I wasn't sure if we were…” I don't end the sentence.

“You weren't sure if we were what?” he prompts.

“If we were talking or if it even mattered. You and I aren't exactly hitting it off the last few weeks. Ever since that thing with Darien that night we've been kind of off.”

“It's just things in my head I needed to get straight.”

I don't say anything this time. “So are we gonna be okay, still friends?” I ask tentatively.

“Yeah, we're okay,” he says impatiently. “But I gotta go.”

“Are you gonna be around later?” I ask.

“Yeah, the funeral's tonight. I'll be there.”

“Yeah, me, too, I'm going with my grandmother. She and Mr. Russell were really close.”

“Are you going to be okay?” he asks.

“What do you mean?”

“Your mom's funeral was just a couple of months ago.”

“Yeah, I know. But I'll be fine,” I say. I know already that isn't true. I really don't want to go to this, but my grandmother needs me and I'm not sure what kind of mood Jade will be in. So I need to be there for her.

“A'ight, I'll see you tonight.”

“Okay, see you,” I say, then hang up and feel a lot better.

The service is at six-thirty, so by five o'clock I start getting dressed. I put on black pants and a gray cardigan and matching top. When I go downstairs, I see Jade is there. We haven't really said anything to each other since our “talk” in her bedroom the night before. Truthfully, I don't know what to expect. I know she is going through her thing, so I don't want to bother her with my drama. “You look nice,” she says, looking up from her BlackBerry.

“Thanks. You do, too,” I say. Seriously she does. I know Tyrece used to buy her expensive stuff. She always hated it because she was afraid people would say she was using him for his money. So that's why she'd never dressed over the top. But tonight she looks like serious money. She has on designer everything and diamonds.

Thankfully, the conversation is kept short since our
grandmother comes into the room seconds after I do. She looks at both of us and just starts crying. I instantly well up, too. We know what each is thinking. The last time we all stood in the living room like this, we were going to my mom's funeral. She opens her arms and Jade and I fall in. I don't know how long we stay there like that, but it is awhile and it feels good.

“All right, ladies, we need to make a move,” my grandmother says. Jade and I nod. “You both look so beautiful,” she adds still tearful. She touches our faces gently and smiles. “Your mother is so proud of you, almost as proud as I am. She so wanted to tell you everything. So, don't be too angry at her. She always did the best she could. But you know love doesn't always turn out like you hope it would, no matter how hard you try or work at it. But know this family is always, always, always, here for you.

“Just look around this room. This is your family and these are your ancestors. For better or for worse we are one. They stood in this room just as you stand here now. And in decades to come your children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren will stand here, too, God willing. Cherish each other, you're sisters and you're family. That always means something. And now that's it for that recipe.” She hugs us again. “Thank you for being with me tonight.”

“Of course, Grandmom, there's no place else we would be,” Jade says sincerely as I nod my complete agreement.

After that we go to the funeral and then to Ms. Charlotte's house to pay our respects. There seems like there are a few hundred people there, but all I can see is Gia holding on to Terrence. I hate funerals.

Getting It Right Ain't Easy

I got back to my life the next day, and the rest of the week went by fast. I went to class, worked and studied and did all the things I was supposed to do. Friday afternoon I came home from school and planned to just chill the rest of the weekend. I didn't have to go to work until Saturday, so tonight was just gonna be about me. I had already made plans with my dad to go to Virginia, so he was going to pick me up and we were going to talk. I just needed to find out what time he was picking me up.

As soon as I walk up the block I see that my grandmother is home. She's sitting on the front porch with Mrs. Harrison from next door and Ms. Charlotte from down the street.
They are talking, laughing and drinking iced tea. It is good to see my grandmother smiling and laughing again. She seems to be really sad lately.

I walk up and say hi to everybody and kiss my grandmother on the cheek. They all respond happily and ask about my day. After that they go into a whole conversation of what it was like when they were in school. Mrs. Harrison's story is the most fascinating since she grew up in Hawaii. Mrs. Harrison is our next-door neighbor and also Terrence's grandmother.

I knew he had another ethnicity in him, I just didn't know what it was, and he never really talked about it so I never knew. She told stories about growing up on the island and how she came to live here in D.C. It was pretty interesting. But after a while they started talking about how everything had changed and I really didn't want to hear that, so I tell my grandmother I'm gonna go pack and get ready to meet my dad.

Since I decided to go to LaVon's party, if only just to piss off Chili, I know I need something good to wear. I haven't been shopping in forever. But I already have a lot of clothes, so I'm cool. I pick out some skinny jeans and a retro Run-DMC T-shirt and then pack something to wear Saturday morning. When I'm done, I call my dad to see what time he's going to pick me up. He picks up on the second ring. “Hi, Dad,” I begin. “How's it going?”

“Hey, baby girl, you okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, I'm fine. I was wondering what time you're gonna pick me up today. I figured we could hang out before I go to LaVon's party tonight.”

“Ah, baby, we can't do it today. I meant to call you earlier to let you know I'm not in D.C. I've been in New York all week.”

“New York,” I say surprised. “What are you doing there?”

“I'm trying to put some things together for the business. I'm talking to some old friends about doing some work. It looks like it just might be working out. I'll be here the rest of the weekend, so we're gonna have to postpone hanging out today.”

Big surprise, this is so lame. My dad has been blowing me off for as long as I can remember. I know I should be happy because he's being proactive about getting his business back together, but I was really looking forward to talking to him. “Okay, I understand,” I say, trying not to sound as disappointed as I am. “Good luck with all that.”

“But, hey, the boys are still looking forward to seeing you. They said something about going to a movie Saturday morning.”

“Yeah, I know. But it's no big deal. We can do that later.”

“Now you know they don't understand the concept of later. They're kids and it's a big deal to them,” he says, then pauses a few seconds. “Baby, hold up, let me call you back in a few.”

Surprise, surprise, this is so typical. “Nah, that's okay, Dad. I'll see you when you get back, or whenever,” I say, before ending the call. I sit on my bed and push my overnight bag to the side. This isn't what I expected, but it's so my dad. Kenneth James Lewis is the ultimate old school
player, so whether or not he is even in New York was debatable. He's always so single-focused on his life, and that's it. Nobody else really matters as far as he's concerned.

I grab my stuff and start hanging it up again. Then it hits me. Screw this. I'm going to Virginia anyway. I decide to take the Metro, then just get Diamond to pick me up. I can either stay at her house or Jalisa's. I start putting my clothes back in the bag when my cell rings. It's my dad. “Yeah,” I say.

“I got you a ride to the house. Cash is in D.C. right now.”

“What?”

“You met Cash, he's Courtney's brother.”

“Yeah, I know who he is. I just didn't want him picking me up. Look, Dad, that's okay. We'll just get together and talk later and I'll see the boys then.”

“No,” he insists. “I don't want to disappoint the boys.”

“What?” I say. Shit, he disappoints me, his daughter, all the damn time.

“Is there a problem?” he asks.

“Yeah, there's a problem. I don't want to be dealing with Courtney and her stupid drama this weekend. You're not gonna be there and I don't want to hear her mouth. And if she brings up my mother one more time, I'm gonna smack the shit out of her. She's your thing, not mine.”

“Where the hell is all this coming from?” he asks.

Oh, please, is he kidding me? Like he doesn't know I hate her guts. But instead of saying that, I just stay quiet. I don't feel like having this conversation with him right now. Seriously, it can't be a total shock that his baby momma
and I don't like each other. Hell, the second time I saw her I slapped her. Remembering the stunned look on her face after the slap still made me smile all over again.

“Look, baby girl, you won't be dealing with Courtney. She's with her mother this weekend. That's why Cash is in D.C. He just dropped her and the baby off.”

“So the boys are with her there, right?” I surmise.

“No, Cash has the boys.”

“Dad, do you even know who this guy is and you just let him take your kids like that? I don't get it. He could be some crazy pedophile or something.”

“He's not. He's okay. I've known Cash a long time. He used to work at the office when Courtney worked there.”

Okay, this story is getting more and more insane.

“Cash is really a nice guy. And since he got out of the Marines, he's grown up a lot. When he was younger, he used to babysit the boys all the time when Courtney and I wanted to be alone together.”

Whoa, did he just say that? Does my father not have a clue who he's talking to? Hello, I'm his daughter, the one he used to ignore when all this was going on. He never had time for me and my mom, so now I know why. Cash was babysitting while he was screwing Courtney. Okay, this is just too much and I have to say something. “Oh, you mean the times when you were supposed to be home with me and Mom, right? When we were supposed to be hanging out like a family, right? When Mom and I would beg you all the time to take us out with you, right?” I say. I swear I just all of a sudden blow. I don't mean it to sound as angry as I am, but whatever. It is all the truth.

“Baby girl…”

I quickly interrupt him. “Dad, you know what? Never mind. Forget this. I don't want your apologies and I don't want to have this discussion with you. You did your thing and made your choice, fine, whatever.”

“Baby girl, it wasn't like that, listen…”

I interrupt him again. “And I'm not your baby girl,” I almost yell. “Not anymore. You have a new baby girl, remember?”

“Kenisha, you will always be my baby girl.”

“Thanks.” I don't say anything else. I just press the end button. He calls right back. I see the caller ID and ignore it. I am tired of the whole stupid conversation. I can't believe I thought things were getting better between us. Everything is still the same. Nothing changes. It just gets buried underneath and comes out even worse. My dad calls three more times. I don't answer any of them. I am through.

I stay in my room just messing around after that. I refuse to be depressed. I call Jalisa and Diamond and tell them plans have changed. They agree to pick me up at the Metro stop later. I repack my bag and head downstairs. As soon as I am halfway down, the doorbell rings. I hear my grandmother coming out of the kitchen to get it. “I got it, Grandmom,” I say and open the door. As soon as I do Jr. and Jason, my crazy little brothers, run into me. “Hey, cookies and milk, what are you guys doing here?” I ask, calling the kids the made-up nicknames I always give them when I see them.

They hug me and of course start arguing over who is which. “I'm cookies,” Jr. says.

“No, I'm cookies,” Jason responds. “You're milk.”

“No, you're milk, I'm cookies.”

A second later they see my grandmother standing in the kitchen doorway behind me and their faces light up all over again. They half run, half walk down the hall to her. I turn to see her bend down as they get to her. They grab and hug her and both start talking at once asking for cookies and cake.

“Hey.” I turn back around, seeing Cash standing there. He smiles. “May I come in?” he asks.

I don't know what I was thinking. I completely forgot somebody had to bring the boys to the house. “Oh, yeah, sure, come on in,” I say.

He comes in and glances around. “Wow, your house is really nice. It's huge.”

“It's my grandmother's house. You're living in my house.”

“Look, I'm getting a little tired of this. Why can't we just call a truce? Neither one of us agrees with the situation or is willing to do anything about it. So let's drop it. All that other stuff is between James and Court.”

“I didn't know you knew my dad before.”

“Before when?” he asks.

“Before when my mom and I lived at the house, before your sister got my dad to kick us out, that before,” I clarify.

He shakes his head. “So much for the truce,” he mutters.

“Yeah, ya think,” I say.

“Look, I just came by to give you a ride up to the house.”

“You mean my house?”

“You want to let that go?”

“No, not really,” I say.

“Good afternoon, and who do we have here?” my grandmom says, as she walks down the hall to where we are still standing in the foyer.

“Sorry, Grandmom, this is Cash. Cash, this is my grandmother, Mrs. King.”

“Good afternoon, ma'am, my name is Cassius Lawson.”

“As in Muhammad Ali, Cassius Clay?” she asks.

“Yes, ma'am, my grandfather is a huge boxing fan.”

“He's Courtney's brother,” I add.

She nods. “I see,” she says, without any outward recognition. “Well, nice to meet you, Cassius. The boys are in the kitchen having cookies and milk. Can I get you something?”

“No, ma'am, I'm fine, thank you.”

“So why are you two standing here in the foyer? Come into the living room.” She turns and walks into the living room, taking her favorite seat by the fireplace we never use. We follow.

“He's not staying, Grandmom,” I say.

“I just came by to pick Kenisha up. James asked me to give her a ride to the house.”

“I guess he didn't call you. My plans have changed. I don't need a ride anymore.”

Cash looks at me. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I'm sure.”

Jr. and Jason come into the living room smiling like sweet little cherubs. They each have a small brown paper bag in
their hand. “We got cookies for tonight,” Jr. says. Jason nods happily. “We gonna see a movie next.”

“Actually, guys, I can't take you to the movie tomorrow. We'll have to do it another time,” I say. The disappointment in their faces is obvious. I hate doing this and I know my dad was right, they don't understand “later.”

“I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the movie tomorrow, okay,” Cash says.

I guess he expects them to be just as excited going with him, but they aren't. Going to the movie with me wasn't just hanging out and seeing a movie. It was a whole day thing at the mall and then at the playground and then to get ice cream and sprinkles. I kind of feel bad seeing their faces now. “I'll tell you what, I'll stop by the house and we'll hang out later,” I tell them. They brighten instantly.

“Good, now that's settled,” my grandmother begins, “Cassius, would you like some cake or cookies for later?”

“Yes, ma'am, thank you.”

“Kenisha, why don't you take Cassius into the kitchen and get him a slice of cake and some cookies?”

“Sure,” I say begrudgingly, then turn and walk to the kitchen. Cash follows.

“That was kind of wrong, not taking them to the movie because you had a fight with your dad.”

“You have no idea what you're talking about and none of this is any of your business anyway,” I say, hacking off a hunk of cake for him. I wrap it in plastic wrap, then I stuff some cookies in a bag and give it to him.

“Thanks.”

I don't say anything. We go back into the living room and
he thanks my grandmother again and says his goodbyes. I give the boys a hug and promise I'll see them soon. They hold their bags close and smile happily enough.

After they leave, my grandmother remarks about the boys as she always does. “They're such sweet little guys,” she says. I nod. “I need to make sure I give your father's friend the cookie recipe, so she can bake cookies for them sometimes.”

“I don't think that's gonna happen, Grandmom,” I say. “Courtney isn't exactly the Betty Crocker type, if you know what I mean. She cooks spaghetti that comes out looking like zombie brains.” I start laughing remembering my dad actually trying to get me to eat with them. To my surprise, my grandmother starts laughing, too.

“Well, no never mind about that. I started out the same way. We all do. My first meatloaf looked like a huge raw meatball. It took five hours to cook it. By the time it was fully done inside the outside looked like the bottom of an old shoe.” She laughs again. “She'll get better in time.”

“No, she won't,” I say, as we laugh again.

“Okay now, so what are your so very important plans this weekend that you don't have time to take those boys to a movie?”