Getting Dumped (3 page)

Burt hit the switch to turn off his radio, but not quickly enough to avoid a second clatter of static and another burst of words declaring me to be the daughter of Satan and the root of all evil in the world.

It sounded almost pleasant when said with a British accent, but clearly I wasn’t being complimented.

Burt looked embarrassed. Beside him, Ernie chuckled. “That Collin. He’s got a little bit of a temper.”

“That was Collin?” I choked. “I haven’t even met him yet. How could he hate me already?”

“He doesn’t hate you, honey,” Ernie said, patting my arm. “I’m sure there’s just been a misunderstanding—”

Suddenly, the door burst open. I spun around to face my attacker, only to discover he looked like Hugh Grant with glasses.

A very angry Hugh Grant with glasses.

“Bugger off, Burt – you don’t answer your bloody radio anymore?” Hugh Grant snapped.

Burt glared at Hugh and set his sandwich on his lap. “I don’t answer my radio when I’m having a nice lunch with my new colleague, Ms. JJ Shultz,” Burt said. “Collin, meet JJ. JJ, meet Collin.”

I stuck my hand out numbly, pleased at least that it was clean. I gave him my most pleasant smile. “You can just call me the spawn of Satan,” I offered.

Still frowning, Collin shook my hand with a firm grip. “My apologies for the outburst, Ms. Shultz, but can you explain to me why the director of accounting and finance for Albright County is threatening to shut down this landfill?”

“What?” I gasped.

“According to his telephone message, he’s calling the Department of Environmental Quality because CO and CH4 levels at the Albright County landfill make the working conditions unsuitable for employees with asthma. Namely, you.”

“But I don’t have asthma!” I protested.

“And I don’t have unsafe levels of carbon monoxide or methane at this landfill, Ms. Shultz, and I’m rather brassed off that this wanker would suggest I do. I monitor all gas levels and chemical activity here. If there’s even the slightest blip—”

“I’m sure this is all a big misunderstanding,” I said, wringing my hands. Collin winced, and I looked down to see I was still gripping his hand. Tightly.

I dropped his hand and wondered what the hell Daniel was up to. He’d always been a protective kind of guy, but this—

“Look, just calm down, keep your pants on, and let me get to the bottom of this,” I said.

“My pants,” he snapped, “are not your concern.”

“In that case, I won’t tell you you’ve got a big mustard stain right next to your fly.”

I could tell he was trying hard not to look, but it was true. I folded my arms over my chest and took a breath. “I’m sure the working conditions here are perfectly fine. Let me talk to my – to, um, the director of accounting and finance and I’ll see if I can clear things up.”

“Please do.” Collin eyed me carefully. “Again, I apologize for the outburst. I take my work here very seriously, and the viability of this facility is crucial to the well-being of the community.”

“I understand,” I said, nodding. “I take my work very seriously, too.”

He regarded me with a curious look. “Today is your first day on the job?”

Beside me, Burt cleared his throat. “She’s already better than half the guys out there. Ran that compactor like a pro.”

Collin’s expression was wary. “Interesting,” he finally said. “Quite the coincidence, really.”

I swallowed hard, not sure exactly what was so interesting or coincidental. Whatever it was, Collin didn’t seem pleased.

He continued staring, suspicion darkening his features. Finally, he gave a curt nod.

“I need to upload a new GPS grid on your machine tomorrow and run a quick diagnostic,” he said. “I’d like access to it first thing in the morning.”

“Sure. Whatever you need.”

Behind me, Burt cleared his throat. “Maybe that would be a good chance for you to give her an overview of our GPS system, Collin,” he suggested. “You could show her how the lifts are structured, how the elevations are staked, all that good stuff.”

Collin looked at me again, his expression unreadable. “I suppose that would be sensible.”

“It’s a date,” I heard myself say. Beside me, Ernie giggled.

“It’s a date,” Collin repeated, looking as though he’d rather poke himself in the eye with a crochet hook. “Ladies, Burt, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a flare station to check. It’s been lovely meeting you, Ms. Shultz.”

“Please, it’s JJ.”

“JJ,” he repeated, his gaze holding mine for the briefest moment. Then he turned and headed for the door.

When he was gone, Ernie squealed and grabbed Burt’s shoulder.

“Oh my, did you see that? He was practically ogling her! I’ve never even seen him look twice at Green Barbie even though she’s perfectly lovely and always wears those tiny little skirts, but JJ’s just much more striking with all that beautiful red hair and those lovely blue eyes and such spunk—”

“Um, hello, I’m right here?” I interrupted, feeling my face flame. “Really, I think you’re overreacting. Collin thought I was a snitch. I don’t think I made the best impression.”

Ernie looked me up and down. “You’re going to liven things up here for sure.”

“You’re crazy,” I said. “Besides, I’m sort of seeing someone already.”

“Sort of?” Ernie raised an eyebrow. “That doesn’t sound serious.”

“It’s complicated,” I said as I began to rinse out my Tupperware in the sink. “We’re working through some disagreements about boundaries and my career and his overprotective tendencies and—” I stopped, realizing I was volunteering way too much information. “Besides, even if you’re right, it’s a moot point. The county has a very strict policy about co-workers dating.”

Behind me, Ernie snorted. “No they don’t.”

I turned to look at her.

“They definitely don’t have any such rule,” she insisted.

Burt chuckled. “They got rid of that – what, five, six years ago?”

“Five,” Ernie said, placing her hand on his shoulder and smiling down at him. “A year after my divorce was final.”

Burt smiled back and reached up to squeeze her hand.

“Oh,” I said, feeling very stupid all of a sudden.

And feeling a little uncomfortable at the thought of Burt and Ernie hooking up.

“So, there’s no rule?” I asked, turning off the faucet as I tried in vain to remember if I’d ever seen anything in the employee manual or if I’d just taken Daniel’s word for it. “No strict county policy?”

“Nope,” Ernie said. “You’re free to have wild, crazy sex with as many co-workers as you like.”

“Great,” I said, feeling a sudden urge to do just that. Preferably while Daniel watched with a stake through his heart.

“Listen, JJ, the whole crew goes out for happy hour every Monday night,” Ernie said. “We’d sure love to have you join us tonight at Goomba’s after work.”

“That sounds good,” I said tentatively. “I’ll have to go home first to shower and change, but—”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” Burt said. “You can come just like you are.”

I looked down at my grubby coveralls and orange safety vest streaked with something smelly and gray. “Um, thanks,” I told him. “I’ll think about it. Now if you'll excuse me, there’s an accounting director I need to disembowel.”

I STOOD IN front of my closet after work trying to decide whether to wear grubby landfill clothes or something sexy to confront Daniel. Did I want to irritate him or make him want to beat his head against the wall for ever refusing to acknowledge me as his girlfriend?

I was still mulling my options in a fuzzy purple bathrobe and my pink hard hat when the doorbell rang.

“Daniel,” I said as I flung open the door. I struggled to keep my voice even, ignoring the flood of warmth I always felt at the sight of him in a well-starched shirt and tie. “I want to talk to you.”

“I know, I got your message,” he said, planting a soft kiss on my lips. “I came over right away.”

My trusty feline companion, Blue Cat, leapt onto the arm of the sofa and began butting his head against Daniel’s hand. Daniel stroked his blue-gray fur, earning himself a drooly purr and a smear of cat fur across his pant leg.

Clearly, Blue Cat had not gotten the message that I was very angry with Daniel.

I folded my arms over my chest and tried to look stern. No easy feat given the purple bathrobe and pink hard hat.

“What is this I hear about you threatening the engineering guy at the landfill and telling him I have asthma?” I demanded. “Or how about the whole story you made up about how county co-workers can’t date?”

His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. I wanted him to tell me none of it was true. He sighed and stroked Blue Cat’s spine.

“JJ, I wanted you to be healthy. I may have exaggerated a little when I left that message expressing concerns about the work environment, but I was worried about your well-being.”

“So talk to
me
about that. Not my new co-workers. Especially not one I might want to date, since that’s apparently not off limits, right?”

I saw him flinch at that, and almost regretted my words.
Almost.
I couldn’t tell from his expression if he was trying to come up with a convincing lie, or if he really, truly didn’t know what I was talking about.

“Here,” he said, taking his hand off Blue Cat and flopping his briefcase open on my dining room table. I watched as he pulled out a thick manual and handed it to me. “Turn to the page on employee relations.”

I did as he asked, locating it quickly in the table of contents.

“What does it say?” he prompted.

I studied the words, gritting my teeth. “Supervisors, managers, executives or anyone else in sensitive or influential positions may not become involved in a relationship with another employee beyond a platonic friendship.”

I kept reading quietly to myself for a moment before closing the book and studying the cover. “August 2006?” I raised an eyebrow at him as I handed the packet back to him.

“I didn’t realize the policy had been changed until you left me that voicemail earlier today. A lot of people didn’t know. The county slipped the change into the manual a few years ago without making a big deal of it, so everyone who’s been here awhile had no idea.”

I gritted my teeth, wanting to stay mad, but also wanting to believe him. It was better than the alternative, which was accepting there must be some reason he didn’t want anyone to know he’d been dating me for three months.

“I’m sorry, JJ,” he murmured, touching my arm. “I really didn’t know. And it’s not like anyone else in the administrative department has been running around having public flings. That place is like
Survivor
. The second people think you’re forming alliances, you’ve suddenly got a target on your back.”

“Not at the landfill,” I pointed out. “They date openly there.”

“I’m sure a lot of things are different at the landfill.” He didn’t sound pleased about that.

I sighed. “Daniel—”

“Let me make it up to you,” he said, stroking his hand along my arm and making the goose bumps rise. “How about I take you to dinner right now. To celebrate your new job?”

“I have plans with my new co-workers.”

He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it, probably rethinking whatever snarky thing he’d been about to retort. Instead, he pulled me into his arms and kissed me.

Kissed me really well, dammit. Hard to stay angry at a guy with lips like that.

I kissed him back without thinking, a little annoyed with the traitorous way my body responded by twining my fingers behind his head and pressing my pelvis against him.

“Mmm,” he murmured against my lips. “I really am sorry, JJ.”

I pulled back, a little disappointed to end the kiss, but not wanting things to heat up until I got my head on straight.

“It’s fine, Daniel,” I sighed. “I just – maybe we could cool things off a little? At least until I wrap my brain around this career switch and all the changes in my life right now. I’m just feeling a little—”

“Confused? Smothered?”

“Yes,” I agreed, not sure whether to be pleased at his perceptiveness or annoyed about the confusion and smothering.

And admittedly, my blood was still pumping hot from that kiss. I wasn’t entirely sure cooling things off was the best idea, but now the idea was out there—

“I understand,” Daniel said. “I can give you space and time if that’s what you need.”

“It’s not a breakup,” I clarified. “Just a— a—”

“I understand.”

I wasn’t sure I did, but I at least felt comforted by his understanding.

“Thank you,” I said. “I should probably get dressed now.”

He gave my hand a squeeze, planted a kiss on my forehead, and gave Blue Cat one more scratch behind the ears.

Then he grabbed his briefcase and smiled. “Have fun with your co-workers.”

He didn’t say “don’t sleep with any of them,” but I suspected the sentiment was there.

GOOMBA’S PUB WAS located just two blocks from my sister Lori’s downtown handbag boutique. The upside of starting my landfill workday at 6 a.m. was that the 3 p.m. quitting time made it pretty easy to hit happy hour. Not wanting to be the first to arrive for the outing with my co-workers, I parked in front of Lori’s shop and went inside to kill a few minutes.

“Hey there,” she said, looking up from a catalogue of paper samples and beaming at me. “Perfect timing. I’m getting new business cards. Do you like this cardstock or this one here?”

I reached over her shoulder to stroke the paper swatches. “This one,” I said, jabbing a finger at the page. “The other one’s too sharp on the edges.”

“That’s what I like about it.”

I shrugged. “You don’t want to give people paper cuts when you hand them your business card.”

“Good point,” Lori mused as she folded the page over and set the catalogue aside.

The storeroom door flew open at the back of the shop and Macy, my sister’s globetrotting intern, strode toward us with a big box of wallets, an even bigger smile, and a killer tan.

“Hey, Lori, I got the storeroom organized, but I think you should have someone look at the mold in the back corner,” Macy said as she plunked the wallets down. “Did you see that thing on the news about the poisonous mold that’s taking over Portland?”