Future Prospect (23 page)

“So where were you two?” Lia asked as she took a sip of beer. She might be heading to the dining hall after this uneaten lunch.

“Out with the new folks at their camp. Crash right in the middle of the best stands of cockers within a thousand kilometers. They’re clearing and setting up these fancy blow up buildings, have running water and power already.” Wayde shook his head and marveled at it as Lia cautiously inserted a spoon into the side of the shivering sharple. Was it a section of some organism or an actual prepared dish?

She knew exactly where the new settlement was. She had requisitioned supplies and finalized the lottery assignments of portions to every person who’d applied for the move. She also knew Colan had gone along as guide, conveniently leaving town the day she’d broken two of her best plates and ordered him from her home in an overheated huff. Two weeks ago. Two long weeks without a glimmer of communication. Blast him and his mesmerizing mouth.

The door opened again, and Lia squinted at the person striding in, silhouetted for a moment in Gamaliel’s glaring sunlight before being revealed as none other than Colan Nestor. Her stomach contracted painfully, and she knew it wasn’t because of the sight of the wobbling sharple. He didn’t falter as he walked over to their table, his face impassive as he glanced at her, and then greeted the other men.

“Sit down, Tor. Lia was kind enough to offer a seat to us. Look at the sharple!” Wayde chortled.

Colan’s gaze avoided her as he took a chair and pulled it to the farthest point from her at the table. Lia wanted to curl her lip at his obviousness. Instead, she took a tiny bite of sharple, its gooey, somehow simultaneously slick and sticky texture capturing her attention. She didn’t think she’d be able to spit it out if she wanted to. It dissolved on her tongue, and she swallowed reflexively, missing the flavor as it somehow disappeared from her palate.

“We found some mighty good shells, Lia,” Rob spoke up around a bite of stew. He wriggled his eyebrows, and she smiled at him, not noticing the glowering man seated a meter away. Two weeks gone and not a message or ping or call. He was a boor.

Rob reached into a grimy pocket and retrieved a tiny pouch, which he proceeded to gently empty on an unused plate, the little mineralized exoskeletons gleaming. He brushed his fingertips over them and sparkles of reflected light danced upward. Lia congratulated him and wondered when Colan was going to acknowledge her presence.

Pouring himself a beer, Colan drained half of it in one go, swallowed hard and then shook his head slightly, his gaze on her the whole time. His silence irritated her to new levels of discomfort.

“How were things with Padev?” he finally asked with a creaky voice. He sipped some more beer and cleared his throat. Padev had been appointed community liaison in his absence, and Lia had enjoyed getting to know the man. He was exponentially more communicative than Colan, and he dressed in fully-fastened clothing.

“Fine. He knows how to message people promptly. Returns calls. Can string together more than three or four words.”

Colan licked his lips, and her belly fluttered. Maybe it was the sharple settling. “Sorry to disappoint, I’m back now. You’ll have to deal with me.”

Lia narrowed her eyes and set down her spoon. “Why? You don’t want the job, and Padev and I have developed a good working relationship.” And he doesn’t expect me to kiss him and wrap my legs around him before he’ll behave, she wanted to add but wasn’t interested in scandalizing either Wayde or Rob who were mechanically eating and drinking as they gazed at the little plate of shells.

“Forget Padev.”

She couldn’t win this battle. It wasn’t her call, and she was hardly going to run to the magistrate and explain why she didn’t want to work with Colan Nestor, the hero who’d talked the bomber down and saved Pearl. “There isn’t much to do. We have everything caught up. It’s been very productive.”

“We should meet.”

“No need, there’s no pressing business.”

“Yes there is. I’ll be by this afternoon.”

“I won’t be there.”

“Where will you be?”

Lia stopped talking, too irritated to trust her responses any more. Both Wayde and Rob finally noticed the tension and stared back and forth between them.

“Anywhere you aren’t, Colan Nestor.” She stood, unwilling to pretend this was a pleasant lunch any longer. “I’m glad to see you Wayde and Rob. I’ll call about that hike.”

She gathered her things and pushed her chair back in, trying to hit Colan’s shins with it under the table. But he wasn’t there. He stood too, following her to the bar where she tried to catch the server’s attention so she could pay her bill.

“Lia, listen—”

Pressing herself close to the pitted resin slab of the bar, she didn’t look at him, afraid of what she might see in his expression. Afraid of what she might not see. “No. I’ve been waiting to hear from you for fourteen days. That’s about thirteen days longer than I should have. So, no, I’m not going to listen to you now.”

The server arrived and told Lia her charges, and she shoved over several marks more than she owed, just so she could leave. At least he didn’t say anything else as she left, and she tugged on the sticky door with more force than she should have. Silent Colan, as usual.

Colan relented and sent Lia a message. An actual, well-written message explaining he’d read all her reports and updated schedules and requesting she meet him so they could coordinate the next week of work. He hoped his professionalism and use of an electronic device to contact her would be impressive enough, or intriguing enough, that she would reply. It had been three hours since he’d sent it and there was no response.

He left his office at the science center where he’d been wasting time hoping she’d come to the door to unload some anger on him. He left her another message when he headed home, hating how he gave her updates on his location like a besotted fool. But what choice did he have? A besotted fool he was.

He’d been miserable and unsettled the whole time he was with the new settlers. He’d known as soon as he left Pearl he should’ve made contact with Lia and apologized. Stars, he’d known he should’ve apologized before he even left her rooms that morning. But he’d been too busy telling himself he didn’t care about her to stop himself.

It was a lie he kept repeating for several days as he dealt with all the minutia of moving a group of inexperienced people through a thick forest of symbiont trees. Once they’d arrived at the new camp and the settlers had settled themselves into, well, settling, he’d had fewer distractions and found himself really considering Lia. And his feelings. He hated thinking about his feelings. No matter how many excuses he tried to manufacture as he sulked in his tent at the new settlement, the only conclusion was he was terribly impressed by her and he wanted to be with her again. To see her, touch her, was all he could imagine; blast, he’d love to argue with her if it meant he was allowed to be near her.

He ruthlessly banished all recollection of how her body had felt during daylight hours, but when he was alone at night in his tent, she invaded his mind and his heart. But here it was fourteen days later, and she was justifiably uninterested in him. All he could think to do to impress her now was to send her a message and use correct coding. Pathetic.

He stopped for supplies at Rue’s. In addition to the basics, she had some good tomatoes, sweet peas, a small wheel of soft goat cheese, fresh soya, three eggs, and some tiny flasks of actual chili oil. He could make something with that. Passing Gina’s house with a wary glance, he used his gate in the fence to enter her backyard and access his house, hoping her boys hadn’t taken up residence while he was gone. Everything looked familiar when he unlocked the door; cluttered, small, unimpressive. Home.

Placing his fresh ingredients in the chiller and removing several items he should have thrown out before he’d left on his trip, Colan paused when he heard light footsteps scuttling up his ladder steps. Probably Ermil and Perrin come to see if he’d brought them anything from the new camp. He headed for the door, preparing himself for a barrage of questions and the infinite movements of two young boys.

He wasn’t prepared to see Liliane Frei at his door, scowl twisting her lips, her hair severely lashed around her skull. But she was beautiful, and the breath left his lungs in a little gust as he appreciated the sight of her.

“Ready for that meeting?”

“Now?” He knew he sounded stupid as she shook her head and put her hands on her hips. Those beautiful full hips he’d grasped when he’d moved inside her warm, wet body. She probably hated him and had erased the whole episode from her memory like a faulty spreadsheet.

“Now. Here or inside?”

“Inside?” Quirking her eyebrows, she walked past him and into his house, trailing a miasma of dissatisfaction. She stood in the middle of his living area, looking around, and all he could think about was that night he’d kissed her for the first time, how he’d touched her at her loud request, how she’d climaxed so quickly and enthusiastically. Oh, he’d blown the escape hatch with this situation.

“So, what matters did you need to discuss? If you actually read the reports and schedules as you claimed, you’d know very well that Padev and I have everything in perfect order.”

“Ah, I—”

Lia took a breath and stared at him, her brown eyes alight with anger. “There’s no need for me to see you.”

He swallowed and tried to think of something to say which might make an impression on her, might make her receptive to the apology he wanted to give. She seemed too walled-off and irate for anything to penetrate. Not that he should be thinking about penetrating anything now.

“Nothing to say? Fourteen days and you have nothing?” Her voice rose, and he knew he was in for a stormy time.

“I didn’t know—”

“You didn’t know! Just because you want to live like a miserable hermit doesn’t mean you get to pretend everyone else does too. All the satellites were in perfect working order all this time, Colan. Ready to transmit any message, ping, or call you might have wanted to make. I checked the networks every day, every few hours, and nothing from you. Nothing!” Her voice cracked, and he ached when he saw tears glittering in her eyes.

“Why didn’t you call me?” Oh, as soon as he said it he wanted to take it back. Lia blinked rapidly and one tear broke from her lashes and trickled down her cheek. Colan felt as if someone had punched him in the gut. He wished someone would so he could collapse on the floor and have some physical misery to balance out the emotional distress.

“I didn’t call you because you made it abundantly clear you didn’t like me. You would have ignored me or blanked my request.”

Colan shook his head. He would have relished any contact from her, would have abased himself at the first opportunity, the first contact she made. He needed to know she wanted to try. With a start, he realized that was exactly what she was doing here. She reached out to him and dreaded his rejection yet again.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t call you or message you or tell you I was leaving town.” A tiny part of the apology he wanted to make, and the smidgen of relief gave him more courage.

“I thought you couldn’t wait to get away from me. That you hated what we did. Regretted it,” Lia whispered and wiped her fingers at her eyes.

“No, Lia, no.” Reaching out for her, he caught her hand and she let him hold it. She was shivering and cold. “I regretted what I said to you after. I regretted it so much I couldn’t figure out what I could say to make up for it. I’m sorry.”

Sniffing and shifting her thin fingers in his grip, Lia straightened her shoulders and stared at him. “That’s all you had to say, you closemouthed fool.”

“I am a fool. I was a fool to treat you that way. I’m sorry I hurt you.” This apology felt even better than the previous ones, and he took a step closer to her and then another when she didn’t flinch back. He lifted his other hand to touch her shoulder,

“You were being honest. You don’t have to like me. It’s not a requirement.” Taking in a shuddering breath, she glanced up at him, hurt darkening her gaze. “But you need to understand: I don’t have sex with people I don’t care about.”

So she had a warm feeling for him at one point. That opinion had probably disappeared as soon as he’d started making those idiotic remarks as they’d lolled in her bed after the best sex he could ever remember having.

“Despite my comments, I don’t have sex with people I don’t like either,” Colan ventured, hoping she would accept his sincerity. Surprisingly, she tightened her grip on his hand and peered into his eyes, breathing shallowly as if she couldn’t catch her breath. He was equally rattled; all these admissions and pleas for understanding were making him light headed. “I was trying to be funny and I am most definitely not.”

“It’s hard to use humor appropriately when you don’t routinely talk to people.”

“You’re right.” His agreement made a small smile curve her lips, and a rush of relief filled him in a pleasant wave. Not angry, she didn’t seem quite so agitated now. She was leaning his way and looking him over.

“You’re all right? Your trip was all right?”

“It was fine. No problems to report.”

“I know. I kept checking the feeds, expecting to hear something terrible happened like it seems to all the time around here.” She swallowed and shuffled a few centimeters closer as he rubbed his hand up and down her arm. Merely to soothe; she’d been worried, and he’d done nothing to alleviate it.

“Nothing terrible happened. Wayde and Rob lost one of the new folk for half a day, but we found him holed up in a hollow cocker, too scared by a clarkia to move. Another one fell into a sinkhole, and we had to winch her out, but she was fine after we sprayed her off and gave her some dry clothes.” There, he’d tried some humor and it seemed to work. Lia’s lips curved into a bigger smile, and she squeezed his hand.
Less angry, very good.
Perhaps she felt almost benign toward him at this point. He’d take benign.

“And you’re well?” Lia tightened her mouth as if she wanted to say more.