Fusion (Explosive #5) (22 page)

My heart nearly stopped when I saw her standing there. A vision in yellow. My best friend. My girl. The love of my short life, and the girl who would blossom into the woman who would one day be my wife. Of that, I had no doubt. I never had. I never would.

I was sixteen years old and in love for the first time in my life. I couldn’t wait to tell her.

“Jeremy,” she asked, her voice breathless and whispery and sexy as hell. The ocean breeze whipped her hair around her face as she took a step towards where I was waiting on the sand. “What is this?”

She stopped at the top step and looked down at me. The white Christmas lights I’d strung up around the gazebo poles illuminated her beautiful face.

“Do you know what day it is?” I asked her.

She cocked her head to the side and wrinkled her nose. I smiled, because this day in history, seemingly so insignificant, ended up being the most important day of my life.

“Jeremy, I…” she trailed off, her face downcast while her eyes searched mine.

I took a step forward, placing my hands on the wooden rails in the open doorframe. “It’s okay, Sierra. It took me a moment to remember, too.”

Then I stepped back and shined my flashlight on the sand castle I’d built, much like the one I had so many years ago.

“Eight years, Sierra,” I whispered. “Eight years ago on this day, you entered my life right here in this very spot. There I was, making a castle, content to do it all on my own, when you appeared out of nowhere and changed my life forever. Eight years since you took hold of my heart. For eight years, you’ve had it, and I have no plans on ever taking it back.”

I stood on the step just below her and took her hands into mine. I gazed up into her eyes, hoping they portrayed the way I felt. Praying that all of my love and adoration was pouring from my soul and she was soaking up every drop.

“Sierra, I’m not a fancy guy. I don’t wear fancy clothes or drive a fancy car. I’m not the guy who will give you fancy words.”

“I’ve never needed fancy, Jeremy,” she whispered, her eyes brimming with tears.

“And that’s part of why I love you,” I answered.

There it was. All out in the open. Simple. Yet oh so beautiful.

“You love me?” she asked, her voice shaky.

I nodded. “I love you, Sierra. I think I’ve always loved you. And I know I always will.”

She sniffled. Then, in a sudden rush, she flung her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. She peppered my face with wet kisses before pulling back to look into my eyes. Her face breaking into a breathtaking smile while her shimmering blue eyes shone like the twinkling stars. “I love you, Jeremy. God, I love you so much. Ever since I was a little girl, I think I knew you were the one for me. I love you.”

My arms tightened around her waist as she dipped her head. Our lips met, and we sealed it with a kiss that had my heart exploding with all the love I had for her.

I knew this wouldn’t be the last time we’d do that. I knew that, one day, Sierra would agree to be my wife. I’d be told to kiss my bride.

I’d do it. And I’d never stop.

I couldn’t wait for that day to come.

Jeremy and I were supposed to be going to some country concert in Pensacola. I spent the day getting ready, having changed at least seven times. I finally decided on a little yellow sundress that highlighted my tan. My hair was in loose waves. It was Jeremy’s favorite style, and it was quickly becoming my own. By the time I was ready and pulling my cowgirl boots on, I was anxious to get the night started. Jeremy had been gone for the past two weeks at football camp, and I was itching to see him.

When the doorbell rang, I practically ripped the door off its hinges to get to him. I was surprised to see Jenna standing on my porch. I glanced around her, trying to spot my boyfriend, but he was nowhere in sight.

“Hey, Sierra. Jeremy wanted to tell you he was running late. Chris and I are going to go grab something to eat first, so we’ll just meet you two there. Okay?”

I tried to hide the disappointment on my face, but I knew I was failing. A week without Jeremy’s kisses was like a week without sunshine. And I desperately needed some Vitamin D. Or, in this case, some Vitamin J. I had no idea how I’d lasted two weeks without him.

“I can just come with you guys, He can meet us there.”

“No!” she shouted a little too quickly. “Umm, I mean, Jeremy wanted to go separately. Here,” she said, handing me an envelope before glancing at her watch. “Open that in precisely five minutes.”

I frowned when I saw my name scrawled in Jeremy’s handwriting. “Jenna, what’s going on?” I asked, but she was already darting down the steps and across the driveway.

She hopped into Chris’s car and gave me a final wave, and then they disappeared from sight.

Sighing, I plopped down on the top step and bided my time, waiting a long, agonizing five minutes until I could rip the envelope open.

Sierra,

First things first. Wipe the frown off your face. Yes, that frown. I know you’re probably wondering what’s going on, and I promise I’ll explain soon. I missed you these past two weeks, and I often found myself wondering how I ever lasted two and a half months without you last year. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to handle a long separation again. So face it, sweetheart, you’re stuck with me. For life. I don’t want to hear any complaining, either.

I just want to say thank you for taking a chance on me. On us. Every day I wake up, I’m thankful you’re mine. Every night when I go to sleep, I pray that you always will be.

Where you go, I go. But, for now, let’s have a little bit of a role reversal. I’m down at the gazebo. Will you go where I go? See you soon.

Jeremy

I reread his words three times, my heart melting into a little puddle every time. God, I’d missed him. I shot up and took off, sprinting all the way across the neighborhood until I got to the gazebo. Before I entered the walkway, I took a few deep breaths.

When my heart stopped racing, I drifted towards the gazebo. The sun had set, but lights came from the structure. As I got closer, I saw that Jeremy had strung white Christmas lights around the wooden frame.

He was standing in the sand, watching me intently. The next few minutes were a blurred whirlwind at the time, but I’d remember them with stunning clarity for the rest of my life.

“
And that’s part of why I love you.
”

My world stopped spinning at his words.

No, that wasn’t right.

My world started spinning, as if I’d been tilted off my axis and I’d needed Jeremy to put me back on my correct path again.

I blinked twice, trying to relive the last few moments. Replaying the words Jeremy had just said to me. But it was no use. No matter how many times I said them to myself, they didn’t seem real.

“You love me?” I asked, needing to hear him say the words again.

And he did. Over and over again until my heart was full of the love he was proclaiming.

That’s when I launched myself at him and told him my truth.

I loved him, too.

I’d loved him for half of my life.

And I knew I would love him for the rest of it.

I might have only been sixteen, but I knew that, for the rest of my life, however long or short that would end up being, I would never love anyone else the way I loved Jeremy.

THAT NIGHT, WHEN I
was lying in bed, I replayed Jeremy’s words repeatedly in my head. Anxiety began to set in low in my belly as I wondered just how things were going to change. If they even were. I had no idea what expectations he might have had now that we’d both admitted we were in love. I loved Jeremy, but I wasn’t ready to push our physical relationship forward. At least, not yet.

At the same time, I didn’t want to disappoint him. What if he wanted more? What if I wasn’t good at it? What if it made him want someone else?

I chastised myself for that last thought. Jeremy wasn’t like that. He loved me, and he was mine. I would be enough for him. I had to be.

And I was right. Nothing in our relationship changed except that we both found great joy in saying, “I love you.” It was my new favorite phrase. It’d been two weeks since he’d dropped the L-bomb on me, and I was still basking in it.

I was also getting a little impatient, wondering why Jeremy hadn’t even tried making a move. Jenna gave me unsolicited details of what she and Chris did, and they caused me to blush. The last time, she had told me about some trick she’d learned in a magazine. She’d looked at me pensively then apologized because she refused to ever hear about the things I did with her brother. I wouldn’t have had much to say, to be honest. Sure, we still made out all the time, but at that point, Jeremy’s hand had only errantly grazed my boob, having gone nowhere my pants. We’d been stuck on first base for far too long. And I’d found I wanted to change that sooner rather than later.

Now that he’d crawled through the window and was in my bed, it was time. His fingers toyed with my waistband, and I squirmed because I wanted him to touch me. I wanted to get to whatever base that was, and I wanted to touch him, too.

He wasted no time bringing his lips to mine. His kisses were more passionate than ever before. He was so determined, whispering promises of how good he wanted to make me feel as he peppered kisses along my jawline while his hand slipped underneath my T-shirt and caressed my bare skin.

My back arched and his hand rose while his lips captured mine again. Jeremy’s kiss was demanding, his mouth hungrily moving over mine. It was overwhelming, intense, and I wanted it to last forever. I also wanted more, and I was finally going to take it.

It’d started as every other night, but as our kisses turned feverish, I knew things were about to change. My hand came up to his, and he tried to pull away. I stopped him, and with my thumb and forefinger, I unbutton my jeans and pushed his hand down.

“Sierra?” he asked, sounding hesitant and unsure.

“Touch me, Jeremy. Please.”

As worked up as I was, I couldn’t help the nerves that fluttered as our hands gravitated towards each other. We’d been dancing around this, inching closer and closer to the physical point of no return, but until now, we’d always stopped before taking the plunge. No longer. Finally, we were on the cusp and there was no turning back. Not that I wanted to.