Full Tilt (Rock Star Chronicles) (31 page)

“All you care about, Everett, is freeing your guilty conscience of David’s death. Isn’t that why you’re here? Isn’t that what this is about? Trying to get back in our good graces—and God’s?”

Karen watched Everett take the direct hit, turn, and wander to the sink. He’d been struggling over those issues, and she prayed he would be able to receive God’s counsel, no one else’s.

“Sheila,” Karen said, “Everett’s here because he loves Eddie and his children and you, believe it or not. He’s sacrificed—”

“If you love me, you should let me live my life.” She stared at the sheets on Wesley’s bed, straightening them repeatedly with her hand. “It’s been over between Eddie and me for a long time. I’m ready for a divorce.”

“But for Wesley’s sake,” Karen said, “and Madison’s—”

“What good’s it do if I stay in a washed-up marriage? That’s not helping them—seeing us fight, watching us tear each other apart. What am I explaining it to you for? You’re newlyweds. Just wait till you have kids.”

The anguish of Karen’s infertility reared its vexing head and ripped at her soul. She saw the consolation on Everett’s face and closed her eyes.

“I’m sorry, Karen. That was…Madison told me. I didn’t mean it. Please, forgive me.” Sheila ran from the room.

Everett opened his arms and stepped toward Karen. She latched onto him and buried her face in his chest. They stayed like that for a minute or two, sharing the sorrow in the aftermath of Sheila’s fiery darts.

But Karen chose to rise above, to forget herself and move on. “I’m going to check on Madison,” she whispered, looking up into Everett’s handsome face.

“It’s okay, you know. We’ve got each other.”

She squeezed him close again, with her head pressed against him. And she could hear his heart beating steadily. That’s what she needed now—steadiness.

At the end of the hospital hallway next to the elevator, Karen saw Madison juggle her purse on one knee, searching through it almost frantically.

“Madison.” Karen walked toward her. “What’s going on?”

“I gotta go.” She opened the purse wide with both hands, peering in at different angles.

“Is everything okay?”

Madison glanced at her then went back to searching the purse.

“What is it, honey?” Karen noticed the Down button was lit. “Can I help?”

“I can’t find my keys.” Her voice shook.

“What’s the hurry? Where are you headed?”

“That was my dad. He’s in trouble. I’ve got to go.”

“Wait a minute. Let’s go tell Ev. One of us can go with you—”

“No.” She snatched the keys and pressed the lit button repeatedly. “There’s no time. I told him I’d meet him. I’ll be back. Don’t worry.”

The bell rang, and the elevator doors lurched open. Madison stepped in, and Karen’s mind whirled. “Madi, please. Tell me where you’re going.”

“I can’t! No one can know.”

The heavy silver doors began to close, and Karen stiff-armed one, triggering them to reverse.

“Madison, the people your dad’s dealing with are
dangerous
. You saw what happened to him and to Everett. Please, let me—”

“Stop!” She forced Karen’s arm away. “I’ve got to do this alone. He needs me.” The doors began to close again, and Madison reached a hand out toward her. “I love you, Aunt Karen. I’m sorry. It’ll be okay. Just pray for us.”

Karen ran back down the hallway to Wesley’s room and swung the large door open. Everett was seated in a chair next to his bed, reading aloud from a Bible.

“Madison’s leaving.” Karen gasped. “You need to follow her! She got a call from Eddie, he’s in trouble, and she’s going to meet him somewhere!”

“She’s in her Bug?” Everett patted his pockets for his keys and phone on the way to the door.

“Yeah, I assume. Light blue with a black top. You gotta catch her right now, or we’ll lose her.”

He was gone.

Everett scanned the oncoming cars as he hurried through the hospital crosswalk, then panned the surrounding city streets and parking deck all the way to the black Nissan loaner he’d been given—no sign of Madison’s Volkswagen.

She’s got to be headed back to New York.

All he could think to do was get to I-95 as fast as he could and head south.

Gunning the Nissan out of the parking garage, he searched for signs to the interstate but saw none. The streets were unfamiliar.

Show me the way, Lord.

He took a right on West Broad and immediately spotted signs for I-95.

Thank You.

Roaring through the gears, he flew down the city streets, hoping for no police and hunting for the light blue bug.

Within three minutes he was merging onto I-95, bound for New York City.

He opened it up, figuring if he didn’t see Madison now, he might never see her again.

31

KAREN PICKED UP THE
open Bible on the chair next to Wesley’s bed and sank into the seat herself.
Where did this come from?

Examining the pages where it looked as if Everett had left off, Karen’s eyes fell to some words that had been underlined in blue ink, and she read quietly: “‘Mary took a jar of costly perfume…and anointed Jesus’ feet with it—’”

Her phone rang, and she picked it up. “Ev?”

“Nope. Sorry. Gray.”

“Oh…hi, Gray.”

“Gee, Karen, don’t sound so excited.”

“Sorry about that.” She snorted. “I thought it was gonna be Ev. Happy New Year! I understand you had quite a night in Miami.”

“It was incredible,” Gray said. “Wish you could’ve been there. One of the guards told me they counted more than 250 inmates who came forward afterward.”

“Can you believe it?”

“If that’s any indication of what’s in store, we better hold on to our seats!”

She chuckled. “I know.”

“Tell me about Wesley.”

“Thankfully, he’s going to make it.” Karen looked at her nephew. “Right now he’s sleeping. We haven’t gotten to talk to him yet to find out why he did this, but we will.”

“I’m praying for him, sweetie.”

“Thank you, friend. We need that.”

“Listen, I’m calling about SoundSystems…”

“Are they in?”

“They’re in!”

Yes!
Everett and Karen had been praying for one more big sponsor. “Oh, Gray,” she turned away from Wesley, “that is
such
good news!”

“So, I’ll see your husband tomorrow for practice?”

“Lord willing, Ev will be ready.”

“Hey, one more thing,” Gray said. “SoundSystems wants new artwork for the tour poster.”

“This late? How are they going to pull that off?”

“They assured me they can make it happen.”

“We weren’t crazy about what we had anyway. What do they have in mind?”

“Nothing concrete. They want to play off the Living Water theme more. You got any ideas?”

Karen flashed back to Madison’s house and her painting of the waterfall from the national forest in Oregon. “I’ve got a good idea. Who do I talk to?”

He gave her the name and number of the marketing coordinator handling the tour promotion for SoundSystems, then they hung up. After leaving a message for the coordinator, Karen opened the Bible and continued reading where she’d left off.

“‘But Judas Iscariot…the one who would betray him, said, “That perfume was worth a fortune. It should have been sold and the money given to the poor.”’”

Karen rested the book in her lap and stared at Wesley for a few moments.
Did he just move?
She thought she’d seen his eyes flicker.
You haven’t had enough sleep.

She pondered what she’d just read. Judas had become outraged by a person who loved Christ enough to worship Him openly and boldly. Lifting the Bible again, she paged backward, searching for the same account told by Matthew. Oddly, it too had been underlined.

“‘Jesus knew what they were thinking and said, “Why are you criticizing her? For she has done a good thing…” Then Judas…went to the chief priests, and asked, “How much will you pay me to get Jesus into your hands?” And they gave him thirty silver coins. From that time on, Judas watched for an opportunity to betray Jesus—’”

“Is that supposed to cheer me up?” Wesley’s hoarse voice made Karen flinch.

“Wesley!” She popped up to the edge of the chair.

“It’s me,” he whispered, holding the white tube.

“I don’t think you should take that out.”

“It’s okay.” He finally opened his eyes fully, which were clearer and bluer than she’d remembered. “I did it before.”

“How do you feel?” she asked.

“Sore.”

There was an uncomfortable silence.

“That Bible.” His eyes went to the book on her lap. “It was Cassidy’s.”

“Your friend from Harbor View?”

He closed his eyes and nodded.

Was Cassidy a Christian? Did her death lead you to attempt suicide?

“We were so sorry to hear about her…”

“How long do I have to stay here, do you know?”

Her mind shifted gears abruptly. She wanted to keep talking about Cassidy and the Bible.

“I’m not sure.” She crossed her arms. “Your mom made it sound like it wouldn’t be more than a day or two.”

“Where is she, anyway?”

“She just stepped out for a minute.”
Ran out, actually. Where is she?

“What am I on?”

“Pardon?”

“What am I on—what meds?”

“Oh, I think some kind of strong pain reliever. Not sure what…”

Wesley turned his head toward the window. Karen suspected this would be one of the few moments she would have alone with him.
Give me the words, Lord.

“Can you tell me what happened, Wesley?”

His head remained fixed as it was. He clasped his hands on his stomach. “What do you care? What difference does it make?”

“Tell me about Cassidy.”

“She was good.” Wesley turned to face her. “Life stinks.”

“But it can be so much better—”

His hands pounded the mattress. “Don’t give me that! Okay? You haven’t lived my life. You have no idea what I’m feeling. So don’t tell me how it can be.”

Wesley’s words came like gunfire. And he was right; Karen didn’t understand. His feelings and experiences—his dark world—were foreign to her.

“I’ll go check on your mom.” As she stood, set the Bible in the chair, and trod softly toward the door, she wondered why she’d been placed there at all.

Everett was about to turn around and head back to the hospital when he spotted Madison’s Beetle in the far left lane doing at least eighty. He dropped into the right lane and forced his stiff body to relax.

As he punched in the speed dial for Karen on the cell, a strong blast of wind nudged the Nissan. “Whoa.”

“Hello.”

“Hey, babe,” he said, eyes glued to the VW. “I found her.”

“Good boy! Where?”

“Going like a rocket down I-95, almost to the New York state line. I’m behind her a couple hundred yards.”

“She’s not gonna stop for anything,” Karen said. “I’d stay back and just make sure everything’s okay. She’s not going to notice you in that loaner.”

“Okay.” He loosened his grip on the steering wheel. “What’s going on at your end?”

“Wesley’s awake.”

“Really? How’s he doing?”

“He’s okay,” she said. “I tried to talk to him about why he hung himself, but he shut me down.”

“What do you mean?” His grip tightened on the wheel. “He didn’t try to hurt you, did he?”

“No. He’s just impossible to talk to.”

“Kind of like I used to be?”

“Worse.”

He sensed her discouragement. “Thanks for trying, babe.”

After Karen shared the news about SoundSystems and her hopes for the new tour poster, they said good-bye.

“You have me here for a reason, Lord.” Everett’s gaze was fixed on Madison’s Bug. “I don’t know what it is, but I pray You’ll protect Eddie and Madison and me. Give me wisdom if I have to get involved…”

Every now and then one of the minivans between Madison and him swerved slightly in the gusting wind. On a whim, Everett picked up his phone, found Eddie’s number, and hit the speed dial. No answer.

Not long after the VW flew over the Connecticut state line into New York, Madison veered off, picking up Interstate 287 and heading straight for White Plains.

She’s going home. Eddie will be there.

Question is, will the Mendazzos?

Sheila was flat-out drunk when she staggered back into Wesley’s hospital room, plopped onto the bed, and tried to lie down on her back next to her son.

“How’s my baby? You doin’ okay, sugar?”

“Jeez, Mom.” The IV nearly ripped out of Wesley’s wrist as he scowled and shoved her off the bed like a bag of smelly garbage. “You’re plastered!”

She smacked the floor.

“Oh my goodness!” Karen shrieked. “Sheila, are you okay?”

Clinging to the white sheets and rising unsteadily back to her knees, Sheila’s expression was one of shock and horror. “How dare you push me away!”

Karen reached to help her up, but Sheila knocked away her hands, nearly falling over as she did. “I don’t need your help, little miss
saint
.”

Wesley’s face was distorted in anger.

Sheila grunted, out of breath and red-faced, as she rose to her feet. “I am so fed up with the whole bunch of you. I’m ready to walk out of this whole—”

“Go ahead!” The veins in Wesley’s bruised neck protruded. “I wish you would! We’re no
family
; never have been!”

“Well, maybe I would go, if you weren’t such a child,” her head wagged, “needin’ to be coddled and watched every minute. When are you ever gonna grow up?” She was practically spitting as she strained to get the last words out without taking another breath.

Even though Karen believed in miracles, the ugly exchange unfolding before her seemed dreadful and hopeless. The heat from embarrassment and uncertainty filled her cheeks.

“People wonder why I’m so messed up.” Wesley’s head snapped the other way. “It’s ’cause my world—my reality—
stinks
!”

“It’s all about
you
, isn’t it, Wesley? It’s always all about you.”