Front Man: One Night in Paris (5 page)

Jack narrowed his eyes, and Sara thought she caught a glimpse of a tear. She took his hand and squeezed it. They walked in silence for a couple of minutes, letting Jack gather his thoughts.
"Sara...I'm not the guy you seem to think I am. I never sold drugs, never; I don't even touch the stuff myself. But that doesn't mean I'm a good person. I've done plenty of shitty things in my time, things I don't even like to think about. Those pictures...that wasn't a great time in my life. I was trying to help someone I loved, but I screwed it up. I let them down. And I'm not going to drag all that out into the open for the sake of my career, I'm just not. Anyway, if they knew the truth...nobody would look at me the same way again. It all ends the same, Sara. I'm done."

"Fine. Give up then."

"I'm not giving up. It's for the best."

"And what are you going to do now, huh? Go rot in your mansion somewhere, become a recluse? Have plastic surgery and get a job in Safeway?"

"Man, I never was much good as a check out chick. I don't know, ok. I'll figure something out. Come on, it's freezing. Lets get you back to the hotel, we'll order some room service, then you can yell at me some more."

"I'm not hungry."

"Sara...I'm sorry ok? Jesus, what do you want me to say?"

"Your band are out there right now, playing the songs you wrote, with that asshole Michael singing your words. All because you're scared of...what exactly? A few stupid journalists?"

"I...I'm not scared, ok, it's just...once they start digging, once they know they're on to something, they won't let it go. If I argue, they're going to keep asking questions, and eventually my whole goddamn life will be down there in black and white. I've worked too damn hard to keep my past private. Some things are best forgotten."

"Some things, or some people?"

Jack shook his head.

"You're not going to let this go, are you? Dammit Sara."

They had reached the main street, and as the traffic whizzed past, Jack waved hopefully at passing taxis. Eventually, a battered black car with a cracked sign pulled up, and they slid into the back seat. Jack crossed his arms over his chest and stared out of the window as they travelled back towards the hotel. Then he felt a soft touch on his shoulder, and Sara wrapped her arms around him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered in his ear, "I'm trying to understand, I am. It's just hard when I don't know the whole story. But you're Jack fucking Carter. You can't give up on your life like that, you just can't."

He squeezed her tight, breathing in the scent of her, feeling her soft hair against his cheek.

"Driver?" he said suddenly, eliciting a Gallic grunt from the front seat."Not the hotel. The Diamond Club. Fast,please."

"Oui Monsieur." The driver sounded almost gleeful as he pulled an illegal U turn and raced off into the night.

***

Michael stepped back from the microphone and raised his hands above his head. The crowd hollered, and he felt his heart leap in his chest. This was the best night of his life. At last, he was the front man, the centre of everyone's attention. All those hours spent working on his vocals had paid off. The fans were loving it. Soon they would forget all about Jack. Once this scandal blew over, the press would tell the dramatic tale of how Compass rose from the ashes, with Michael at the helm, to start a new and even brighter era. Then maybe, in a year or so, it would be time to go solo... He was so busy fantasizing, that at first Michael didn't notice the stirring at the back of the club. Ripples spread through the crowd, whispers and gasps turning to screams of excitement that travelled towards the stage. Squinting through the bright lights, Michael could see the audience part as someone shouldered their way through.

“No fucking way,” he growled under his breath. Assisted by a sea of hands, Jack Carter hauled himself up on to the stage and grabbed a microphone from the stand. A sudden hush fell over the auditorium.

“Um, hi. Sorry I'm late.” Laughter from the crowd.

“I wasn't going to come here tonight. I thought, after the allegations that have been printed about me, that Compass would be better off without me. Luckily, someone convinced me otherwise. I don't have time to tell you the whole story tonight....I think most of you would prefer to hear some music. But what I can tell you, is that I have never in my life sold drugs. I've never even taken drugs, if you want to know the truth. I know you have no reason to believe me...but I hope that you can trust me on this one. And whatever you might think of me, I hope you can still enjoy our music. Thank you.”

For a moment, everything was still. Then the applause started, just a few people at first, but the others joined in until the clapping of hands thundered around the room. Micheal’s face was white with rage as a sound man rushed unto the stage to hook up Jack's microphone.

“Nice one, douche bag,” he hissed, “Couldn't bear to be out of the spotlight for a second? Oh, and if you're going to do a heartwarming speech, maybe save it for a crowd that actually speaks English? These morons don't even know what they're clapping for.”

“I'm sure someone will translate for them,” Jack said with a shrug. Someone handed him his guitar, and he eased the strap onto his shoulder. He had felt naked without it.

“Shouldn't you be taking care of your little piece of ass? We can manage fine without you.” Michael spat at Jack, casting a desultory glance at where Sara waited at the side of the stage.

“Shut the fuck up Michael,” Andy, the drummer, suddenly butted in. “Let's just get the next song going, ok?” The band all turned to their instruments. Andy didn't normally say much, but when he did, they listened. As they launched into What Comes Next, Jack felt a tiny glimmer of hope. The crowd sang alongside him, just as they always did. Perhaps things hadn't changed all that much.

Watching Jack hold the crowd in the palm of his hand, Sara was glowing. She knew if he just faced them, the public would see through all the lies in the papers. People weren't stupid, they knew sincerity when they saw it. Jack seemed like a different person to the broken down man she had wrapped her arms around only a couple of hours earlier. Every moment he spent performing seemed to breathe new life into him. She couldn't wait to harness some of that new energy when they got back to the hotel room. Sara was thinking fondly of that giant shower, with plenty of room for two, when she realized that Jack was walking towards her side of the stage.

“Ladies and gentleman, I'd like to dedicate this song to someone very special. Without her I quite literally wouldn't be here today. “ Jack knelt down and extended his hand towards Sara. Her eyes widened, and she shook her head, but Jack just grinned and grabbed hold of her. Someone behind her took the rather worrying initiative to lift her legs, and before she knew it, Sara was being dragged onto the stage.

“Please give a big hand for the very beautiful Sara Lansbury!” Jack raised her hand in the air, and the crowd applauded enthusiastically. The rest of the band clapped as well, with the exception of Michael, whose face seemed to be frozen in a permanent scowl. Sara stood dead still, frozen like a deer in the headlights, as Jack sang to her in front of all those people. She wanted to pinch herself. It was like being in the middle of her silliest adolescent fantasy, except the man in front of her was very real. He had flaws, a bruised heart, and a lot of explaining to do.

After the show, the band had a few scheduled meet and greets with fans and TV people. Sara sank into a comfortable chair in the dressing room. Exhaustion was finally getting the better of her. Her eyes were just starting to close when there was a knock at the door.

“Sara? Sorry to disturb you,” the portly middle aged man held out his hand. “Jared, the boys' manager. We've not met, but I've heard a lot about you.”

“Really?” Sara couldn't keep the surprise out of her voice.

Jared smiled. “Yes, it seems like you made quite the impression on our Jack. Rock star he might be, but it's not every girl he flies half way around the world.”

Sara blushed, feeling awkward all of a sudden. It dawned on her how silly she might look to outsiders, coming all this way on the whim of a man she barely knew.

“Seems like he might have made a smart choice for once in his life. God knows it's about time!”

Jared gave her a fatherly pat on the shoulder, and Sara smiled shyly.

“Anyway, I just came in to say thank you for talking some sense into him. I don't know what you did, but he's finally agreed to a proper interview, get all this stuff out in the open. Risky, I know, but there's a few journalists in the business you can still trust to write a fair story. He's been keeping the Laura business a secret for too long...he thinks I don't notice, but I know it eats away at him. And now they've turned up those bloody photos, we might as well give them the whole story. At least then people will hear the truth, not just some half baked theories the papers cook up. I think the public will appreciate that, don't you?”

Sara nodded, trying to pretend she knew what he was talking about, but all his years in the music business had given Jared a sixth sense.

“Shit. He didn't actually tell you, did he?”

“Not as such. I think he wanted to, he just...”

“Couldn't find the words, I bet. That's Jacky boy for you. He'll write the most beautiful lyrics you ever heard, but when it gets personal, getting a whole sentence out of him's a challenge.”

Sara smiled. “I'm beginning to see that.”

“Look, Sara, he'll kill me if he knows I said anything. But you ought to know. Jack's parents died when he was nineteen, just a kid really.” Sara nodded. That much had made it to the Wikipedia page.

“Left him all on his own, with his kid sister to look after.”

“Laura.” She guessed.

“You got it. Man, Jack loved that kid. From the day she was born he looked out for her. Laura and his music, those were the only two things that mattered to Jack. But there was only so much he could do for her. Sixteen-year-old girl, lost her parents...she went the way a lot of them do. Got in with a bad crowd. Got kicked out of school, that's when she started with the drugs. And it all went down hill from there. By the time I met Jack, after we first spotted the boys on the bar circuit, she was injecting. Jack tried everything, spent every cent he had trying to get her counselling and what have you. Followed her out at night, making sure she got home safe no matter how messed up she was. Poor boy, he never gave up on her. Finally, just before the first album was about to drop, we got her a spot at this really nice rehab centre, one of the best. Jack told her she had to go have the treatment, or he was going to kick her out of the house...that's what they tell you to say, you know? You have to stop enabling them or whatever. And the record company had a tour lined up for Compass, Jack was going to be on the road. He wouldn't have been able to keep any eye on her all the time. Anyway, the night before he was going to drive her up there, Laura took off. Just vanished into thin air. And that was the last Jack heard of her. He almost quit the band then and there, it took all I had to persuade him not to. I don't think he's ever forgiven himself.”

“Those pictures...”

“Yeah, that's Laura in the photos, and some of her no good 'friends.' I can't believe Jack was stupid enough to go somewhere that sleazy...but he would have followed her into the mouth of hell if it meant keeping his little sister safe. That's just the kind of guy he is. For a little while I even wondered...it sounds stupid, but I wondered if maybe he had done a bit of dealing. Made a bit of money and kept an eye on his sister at the same time. But when Jack Carter looks you in the eye and tells you something...well, he's a man of his word, I'll tell you that.”

“Wow. I never even imagined...poor Jack. No wonder he never wanted to talk about it.”

“He's been carrying the guilt around all these years. I'm hoping by finally speaking out, some good might come of it.”

“Do you know what happened? To Laura, I mean?”

Jared sighed and shook his head. “If you ask Jack, she's dead. I don't think he can face the thought of her still being out there somewhere. But I guess I've always hoped she might get in touch one day, you know. Give him a bit of closure.”

“No such thing as closure, Jared, you know that.” Jared and Sara whipped round to see Jack standing in the doorway. Sara's stomach gave a little flip.

“If you're going to talk about a person, there are more subtle places than their own dressing room.”

Sara tried desperately to read Jack's face, but his expression stayed neutral. She could only hope he wasn't too angry with her.

“Jack, I'm sorry buddy. I just thought she ought to know...I overstepped the mark, I'm sorry man.”

“It's okay Jared. In your own interfering way, I know you were just trying to help. And you're right, I suck when it comes to talking about this kind of stuff...I do want to sometimes, but I just don't know how.” He turned to Sara, and in that moment he looked so tired and vulnerable, that she couldn't stand not to be touching him. She stood and flung herself into his arms, pressing her face into his chest.

“So, now you know all my secrets,” Jack said to the top of Sara's head. “Still wanna come back to the hotel room?”

“You're an idiot.” Sara mumbled, raising her face to place a gentle kiss on his lips. At last, Jack smiled.

The moment the door opened, they were met by a barrage of photographers. Sara was blinded by flashes as Jared strode ahead of them towards the car, waving away microphones and yelling 'No comment!' at anyone who would listen.

“Jack, is there any truth to these allegations?”

“Jack, how can you explain the photos we saw today?”

“Sara, are you Jack's girlfriend?”

“Are you two engaged?”

“Jack, do you still take drugs?”

“Are you leaving the band?”

As he helped Sara into the back seat, Jack turned back one last time to the huddled paparazzi.

“There is no Compass without Jack Carter. There's no way I'd leave the band. I'll see you in Madrid!”