From The Wreckage - Complete (64 page)

Jules pinches her arm discreetly as West pulls onto the street and heads away from campus.
I must be dreaming because this is too easy
, she tells herself as she sneaks a peek at his profile. His cheeks are splotchy and red from the heat, a Russian trait he inherited. She recalls how she used to tease that he looked like he was blushing. His dark hair is damp still, and while it is shorter than it was in high-school, the thick mass still sticks up and about in its normal careless way. The most prominent change she can see is his jawline. It’s more chiseled, something she didn’t think was possible, and harder looking. He looks like the man he is, instead of a teenage boy. His shoulders and arms bare the same resemblance. Everything about him screams mature, hard, and she feels somewhat mournful of the months she missed out on. The months that made him into this man.

“You’re staring,” he remarks without looking her way and she flushes with embarrassment.

“You’ve changed.” As soon as she says the words, she wants to take them back. She feels silly remarking on his physical appearance.

“How’s that?”

Jules’ mind scrambles for something to say. “Your muscles,” she blurts out, pursing her lips and shaking her head as she turns to look out the window. 

West laughs gently. ”My muscles?”

She lets out a deep breath, “Forget it. I was just thinking stupid thoughts.”

“Nothing you think is stupid,” he points out, reaching for her hand and pulling it across the cab so he can press a kiss to the top of it. Their fingers stay entwined and she sighs inwardly. 

This is too easy.

Jules knocks the thought away and smiles at him. “I was admiring them, your muscles, that is,” she finally explains after a brief pause, grinning as he flexes a little in the driver’s seat. “Football’s had a positive effect on you, physically speaking.”

“You’ve changed, too.”

“I have?” Jules straightens and preens, her fingers automatically touching her face and smoothing her hair, causing West to chuckle at her again.

“You’re more beautiful, if that’s even possible -”

“Oh, stop.”

“It’s true. Plus, your hair is a deeper red… darker.”

“Oh, well that’s L’Oreal,” she laughs as she tugs on the strands. “Katie was bored and wanted to color my hair.”

“It’s still you. I like it.”

“Thank you.”

They drive for twenty minutes south of campus before West pulls down a road to a local park. The area is crowded with stay-at-home moms watching their kids play on the playground. A trail that runs around the edge is spotted with joggers and people out walking their pets. Jules admires the area as West drives past the crowd and down a small road leading to another, more secluded, section of the park. There’s a lake and an older playground across from tennis courts surrounded by woods.  

They park in the corner of the lot and West turns off the engine and sits there staring out the front windshield at the smooth water in front of them.

“Austin and I were never a couple.” 

“I know.”

Surprised, she turns and unbuckles her seatbelt, to face him. “You know?”

“He stopped by to see me after my game last Saturday and told me. I’m sorry I didn’t give you the chance to explain-” He stops and runs his hand through his hair. “Not that you owe me an explanation, but I should have let you tell me what was going on.”

He snaps his seatbelt and pops open his door, “Come on.”

They jump out of the truck and walk side by side to the playground.  When they reach the swing set, they both take a seat and Jules kicks off with her toe letting the slight breeze cool her as she swings. West remains still, his eyes following her as she moves back and forth.

“How do you like Freemont?” she asks as she pumps her legs and moves through the air.

He laughs out loud and she giggles at herself. “Too simple?”

“I think we’re past small talk, Jules,” he points out. “But, to answer your question, it’s okay. I’d rather be at A&M. It was always my plan to be there.”

She assumes he didn’t make it into A&M based on grades and missing the last half of senior year, and she feels guilt rising up. “Sorry.”

“For what? It’s not your fault. I could have gotten in.”

“I just assumed with your leaving school-”

“Jules, I finished school at Crestdale. Believe it or not, I was a good student.”

Her eyes flick to him before she pumps her legs harder, propelling her swing higher. “I always knew you weren’t the bad boy you pretended to be.”

“You always knew me better than I even knew myself.”

“So why Freemont?”

“Football. My counselor at Crestdale decided I needed to play again and they let me walk on.” He shrugs.

“Surely with your dad’s pull and your name you could have gotten a walk-on at A&M.”

“Sure, as a bench warmer. Roberts is a beast and a fifth year senior,” he says about A&M’s starting QB. Jules nods in agreement at his assessment, having seen him play. “I wasn’t ready to walk-on and play when we approached them in June. We were a little late, anyway. So Dr. Steel pulled some strings with friends and got me an interview with Coach. Freemont was happy to offer me a spot.”

“And you’re getting to play?”

He laughs, “Yeah, Jules. I get to play.”

“You missed it, didn’t you? Playing football.”

“There’s only one thing I’ve ever missed more,” he replies. The warmth and intensity of his eyes as they lock onto hers and make his point for him.

Jules takes a shaky breath and drags her foot along the ground to stop her swing. She takes a small hop off as it slows down and she lands perfectly in the sand, the swing hitting her backside as it continues to move back and forth. Looking around, she decides to sit on a nearby bench so they can talk more seriously. West follows as she moves a few feet over and takes a seat. He stands in front of her and stuffs his hands into the pockets of his loose cargo shorts.

“You’re ready to talk, huh?” he asks and she nods.

“I feel like I have so many explanations to give you. Not only from that night, but before that too. I don’t know where to begin,” he admits.

“I think we both have a lot of explanations to make. Let’s start with what happened that night after the wreck. I woke up a few days afterwards and you were already gone.”

“I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine how that felt for you.” West falls to the bench and takes her hand. He clears his throat and explains, “I swear, Jules, I never would have left if I thought there was another choice. I was there for days. I didn’t just leave. If you believe I would just walk away then there is no reason to explain what happened.”

“I have to be honest,” she pulls her hand from his and tucks it under her crossed arms. “Honestly? I don’t know what I believe anymore and I don’t understand what happened to make you think you had to leave.” 

“Austin said he explained the situation to you back then.” She frowns, not quite sure what he’s referring to. West runs his hands through his hair in agitation. “Okay, you know the people in the car we hit? That other couple? They were pressing charges and threatening to sue. They were going after my dad, your parents, Rick and Aubrey; they weren’t even injured, but they claimed mental distress and -” He shakes his head, clearly disgusted and cuts himself off. “Anyway, Rick fessed up pretty quickly once Aubrey was able to tell the cops about the incident. Lucky for us, she called 9-1-1 and was on the phone with them when it happened, so they had proof from the call records.” 

West sits forward, leaning his elbows on his knees and folding his hands; Jules moves forward with him, mimicking his pose.

“Problem was, I’d been drinking. I wasn’t drunk by any means, you know that, right? I never would have driven if that had been the case. I had two drinks.” 

“Of course. I know you wouldn’t have gotten behind that wheel with me if you were.” Jules acknowledges honestly with a nod of her head. West was never careless with her, it was one of the reasons she fell in love with him.

“I wasn’t drunk, but there was alcohol, and of course I was underage. My dad probably could have smoothed things over, but something happened.”

She holds her breath and waits for him to explain.

“Your parents rushed into the hospital that night and the fear in their faces -” West stops abruptly and Jules wants to touch his shoulder; she wants to console him as he hunches farther forward.

“I remember when my parents sat my brothers and I down to tell us about Mom’s cancer, how it was terminal. The pain, the hopelessness hidden in the creases along their mouths and eyes; even while they tried to remain optimistic.” Jules eyes sting with tears as West’s voice cracks. 

“That’s what your parents looked like when they came in that night. They spotted me standing there in the ER covered in your blood and I swear your mom almost fainted on the spot. She ran to me, scanning over my face and arms, asking if I was hurt. She was crying and she hugged me so tightly, like my own mom would if she’d been there. Your dad, on the other hand, gave me one grim look and went straight to the desk for answers. They were still running tests and doing whatever it is they did with you… there was nothing to do but wait at the moment. 

“I hadn’t been seen yet; I only had a few scrapes and cuts, but they wanted to take me back to run a few x-rays. They were worried about internal injuries, I guess. When I returned, your parents were sitting in the corner and I approached them, trying to explain what had happened. Your dad asked me to wait until they’d seen you. I tried a few times to talk to them after that, but your mom seemed to be in shock and your dad was, uh.” 

He sits back, turning to Jules with a wry smile. “Let’s say he was scary calm and scary angry and leave it at that. My dad finally pulled me away from the area and down to the cafeteria. By that time, Mindy and Carson had arrived and we left them in the waiting room to wait for news.”

“They didn’t tell me any of this. I can’t believe they would shun you like that, they really liked you.” Jules says, feeling physically ill with her parent’s actions. She leans forward, shaking her head, as West continues.

“Well yeah, that was before you ran out on them, went to a party, and drove with your drunk boyfriend,” he points out sarcastically. 

“Once they knew you were going to be okay, though, that’s when things got uglier. Your mom took pity on me after you were finally put in a room and she allowed me to see you the following day, but when your dad walked in he went ballistic. He blamed me for your behavior, said you’d been drinking and partying ever since we’d met. How you’d never snuck out before, how your grades were slipping, you were short tempered and too clingy… I forget what else he said, but he laid all the blame at my feet.”

The tears in her eyes quickly dry up as anger begins to build up. Jules leans into West’s side lightly, trying to give him what little comfort she can, though it feels like too little too late.

“He ordered me out of your life.”

“I can’t -”

“I let him believe I was to blame, Jules.”

“What! Why?”

“I guess I let myself believe it for a while, too. I shouldn’t have been at that party that night. I should have stayed home when you told me you couldn’t go out or I should have met you back at my place when you did call me.”

“I begged you to go to that party. It’s not your fault.”

“Jules, I could have said no to you.” He bumps her shoulder with a small laugh. “It was possible, upon occasion, to say no to you.”

“So what happened to make you leave and go to the facility?”

“It doesn’t matter, does it? In the end it was the right decision for me,” he waffles, pushing off the bench and taking a few steps forward.

Jules examines his back and replays all he’s said while sitting here. She recalls the warning of how she doesn’t know the full story and the aversion her father had to talking about West, or the wreck, with her. Knowing her parents most likely played a role in him leaving hurts. She steps up behind him and leans into his back, her head resting right under his shoulder blades, and she feels him stiffen at the contact.

“I missed this,” she murmurs as she feels his muscles rise and fall as he takes a deep breath. “I missed the way you always felt so strong when I needed you to be strong.”

“You make me stronger,” he whispers low. He turns slowly and she falls away from leaning against him until they are facing each other. His hand brushes her cheek and her arms wrap around his waist automatically, as if she’d been doing it daily for the last ten months. “Here’s the thing, Buff, I don’t want to hurt your relationship with your parents, I swear I don’t. But, I’m going to put us first here. I can live with them hating me, but I can’t live without you.”

She melts against him and looks up into his face as he continues to explain the past.

“When the cops told our parents about the alcohol and the other couple wanting to sue us all for liability, I flipped.  I didn’t want you to get in any more trouble than you already were, so I asked my dad to work out whatever deal he could to get you, and your family, off the hook. He was pulling strings with a judge and talking with the couple, asking them to back off. Things seemed as if they might actually work out and then…”