Frisky Business (26 page)

‘Well, maybe you need to give it some time.’

‘But I don’t want to. I want to feel the spark! I don’t want someone to grow on me like fecking fungus. I don’t want to organise myself into falling in love. I want it to
happen.’

‘I know what you mean,’ Romy sighed.

‘I guess meeting Michael just brought it home to me. He’s the guy I’ve been looking for the whole time – on paper anyway. All this time I’ve been so focused on just meeting someone nice and normal and reasonable looking – as if that’s all it takes. And then I met him and I realise that isn’t enough.’

‘It doesn’t help that you’re working from home now,’ Romy said, refilling their glasses. ‘Maybe you need to widen your social circle.’

‘But
how? And don’t say evening classes.’

‘Well, don’t look at me. I’m hardly the one to give advice. The last action I got was at David’s Hallowe’en party.’

‘No progress with you and Kit?’

‘No. Like I say, I’ve hardly seen him since he moved in. I’m surprised he seems to have got a social life together here so quickly. I mean I don’t think he kept in touch with anyone while he was in New York, so he’d be starting from zero.’

‘Ah, well, he has certain advantages, doesn’t he?’ Lesley said, tapping her nose. ‘He’s probably hooked up with the local BDSM community.’

‘You think he could have found them so soon?’

‘Well, there can’t be many of them around, can there?’

‘I have no idea,’ Romy said, taking a sip of her wine. ‘Maybe there are loads of them. Or none. Do you think there even
is
a local BDSM community?’

‘Oh, I’m sure there is,’ Lesley said. ‘Ireland isn’t as backward as it used to be. And with the internet, it’s so easy to find where your own kind hang out. Hey, why don’t we Google it? Where’s your laptop?’

‘Danny will be here soon,’ Romy said, glancing nervously towards her laptop in the corner of the room. ‘We can’t be looking at this stuff when he comes.’

‘Well, get it quick then,’ Lesley said, waving her hand at Romy impatiently.

Romy grabbed the laptop and brought it over to the sofa. She put it on the coffee table and moved the mouse around to bring it to life. ‘What will I put in?’ she asked.

‘Try BDSM Dublin.’

Romy dutifully typed into the search engine, and, to her surprise, there were several results. As well as a site devoted to BDSM in Ireland, there was a blog and links for a couple of clubs as well as the inevitable sex shops, escort agencies and dominatrix
services. There was even a website for a dungeon for hire.

‘Well?’ Lesley said, edging closer to look at the screen. ‘Open that one,’ she said, pointing to the main website for the BDSM community in Ireland.

For minutes, they sat in silence, reading the screen as Romy clicked through the pages. There were forums and discussion boards and information on meet-ups in Dublin.

‘They call their meet-ups “munches”,’ Lesley commented. ‘Sounds rude, doesn’t it?’

‘I can’t believe there’s so much of this going on in Dublin,’ Romy said.

‘Maybe you should become a member – find out more about it,’ Lesley suggested. ‘They seem like a friendly bunch.’

‘Uh-uh. No thanks.’ Romy added the site to her favourites so she could read it more thoroughly later. Then she clicked on the blog, which turned out to be by a Dublin couple, writing about their dominant/submissive relationship. Romy added that to her favourites too.

‘Give us a look at that dungeon,’ Lesley said.

Romy duly clicked on the link and they both gazed in silence at the screen as they read through the descriptions of the accommodation and looked at the photographs of the various equipment provided.

‘Wow, I wish I’d known about this place when I was organising the Christmas party at my last job,’ Lesley said. ‘I’d have loved to have had a go at my boss on that rack.’ She pointed to a particularly tortuous looking piece of apparatus.

‘It looks medieval,’ Romy said, shuddering. She shut the laptop down, replacing it on the table in the corner.

‘So there you have it,’ Lesley said. ‘There’s loads of this stuff going on in Dublin. Kit’s probably out there shoving his butt plug up someone’s arse as we speak.’

‘Ugh!’
Romy giggled, almost spitting her wine. ‘But he wouldn’t use that actual butt plug, would he?’ she said, sobering up. ‘I mean surely you wouldn’t use the same butt plug on different girls? It’s not very hygienic.’

‘I don’t know,’ Lesley mused. ‘But these are all questions we can ask May later. I was in with her today, and I told her you needed some advice. She said she’d call over tonight if she’s not too … busy.’

‘Busy bonking Frank, you mean. Well, she’d better not come while Danny’s here.’

‘True. That’s not a side of you he wants to see.’

‘That’s not a side of me, full stop.’

‘But maybe it could be – with the right training. May was very excited when I told her you were interested in BDSM. She said she’s got loads to show us.’

‘Great!’ Romy rolled her eyes.

Just then the doorbell rang. ‘Here’s Danny,’ Romy said, getting up to answer it. ‘Not a word of this while he’s here, okay? And don’t mention Paul – he’s still pining.’

‘He should come over to our side,’ Lesley grinned. ‘He’s a terrible loss to womankind, and he’s way too lovely for a man to appreciate.’

‘Hi, Lesley,’ Danny said as he followed Romy back into the sitting room. ‘Is my godson asleep?’ he asked Romy as he handed her a bottle of red.

‘Yes, he is, touch wood,’ Romy said, tapping her forehead with her knuckles.

Lesley poured wine into the empty glass on the coffee table and handed it to him. ‘Drink up! ’ she said, raising her own glass to him. ‘You have some catching up to do.’

‘So
what are we talking about?’ he asked as he took an armchair opposite them.

Lesley’s eyes gleamed and she threw Romy a mischievous look. ‘Men,’ she said. ‘What else?’

‘We talk about lots of other things,’ Romy said indignantly.

‘So what have you been up to, Danny?’ Lesley asked. ‘Any new man in your life yet?’

‘No,’ he said. ‘You?’

‘No. All the good ones are taken – or gay.’

‘I won’t argue with that. Or taken
and
gay.’

‘Lesley’s taking a break from dating,’ Romy told him. ‘She was traumatised by a successful date.’

As they got mildly drunk together, they bemoaned their collective lack of anything resembling a love life.

‘God, if we could even get one man between us,’ Lesley wailed.

‘We could do a time share,’ Romy said, giggling.

‘If you nab Kit, you’ll have to share him,’ Lesley said. ‘One for all and all for one!’ she exclaimed, sloshing wine from her glass as she jerked it up in salute.

‘You’re not – are you?’ Danny asked. ‘Nabbing Kit.’

‘I don’t know,’ Romy said, a little needled that he seemed so shocked by the idea. ‘Maybe.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah … what’s wrong with that?’

‘Nothing. Just – you can do better.’

‘Have you seen Kit?’ Lesley said, looking askance at Danny. ‘He’s no slouch in the looks department.’

‘I know he’s very good-looking, but isn’t he a bit … well, thick?’ Danny said with an apologetic wince.

‘No!’ Romy frowned. ‘That’s mean.’

‘He
was
a bit thick in school,’ Lesley said.

‘He just wasn’t very academic,’ Romy replied. ‘He’s clever in
other ways. He has street smarts. He was very successful at his job in New York. And it turns out he’s good with his hands too. He put up some shelves for May during the week and she’s been singing his praises to me ever since.’

‘Who’d have thought? But you already knew he was good with his hands, didn’t you?’ Lesley said, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

‘No, I never – we never … did anything back then.’

‘What? You were glued to each other for two years.’

‘But it was just snogging and … teenage stuff. We didn’t—’

‘You’re saying you never shagged Kit?’

‘No. Never.’
Except, of course, that time in the cupboard last Hallowe’en.
She caught Lesley’s eye and she could tell she was thinking the same thing.

‘Well, I can totally see the two of you getting back together,’ Lesley said supportively. ‘And if you don’t, maybe I’ll have a shot at him myself.’

‘You can’t do that. He’s my ex, therefore he’s officially off-limits.’

‘That’s the rule,’ Danny nodded in agreement.

‘But that was years ago,’ Lesley said. ‘There must be a statute of limitations on those embargos.’

‘Nope. If I can’t have him, no one can. In perpetuity. Now let’s not talk about men anymore. That’s not what spinsters’ night is about.’

Several bottles of wine, a huge plate of nachos and a very giggly game of Pictionary later, Danny decided it was time to go before he passed out on the floor. Romy and Lesley poured him into a taxi and waved him off, and they were just starting to tidy up when there was a knock on the front door. Romy opened
it to find May standing outside, clutching an armful of books and albums. She had forgotten all about May calling over.

‘Hello, Romy. I hope I’m not too late,’ she said, smiling. She looked bright-eyed and wide awake, her bird-like eyes dancing with excitement.

Romy stifled a yawn. ‘Well, I was just clearing up before going to bed—’

‘Only Lesley told me earlier that you’d like some advice, and I’ve been hunting out some things that might help,’ she said, brandishing her books. She seemed so eager, Romy didn’t have the heart to turn her away.

‘Yes, well, come in,’ she said, standing back to let her pass. ‘Would you like a drink?’ she asked as she led May into the sitting room.

‘Yes, please. Brandy would be lovely.’

‘Oh, hello, May,’ Lesley said in surprise as she walked in from the kitchen.

‘Hello, Lesley.’ May turned to her. ‘I brought those books and things I was telling you about.’

‘Great!’

Romy handed May a glass of brandy and settled on the couch beside her. Lesley sat on May’s other side.

‘So, Lesley tells me you’re interested in trying the BDSM lifestyle,’ May said, turning to Romy.

‘Oh, um … well, I’m not sure. I’m just interested in finding out more about it. There’s someone I know who might be … into it.’

‘So you’re looking into it for a friend,’ May said with a small smile, obviously convinced this ‘friend’ was actually Romy herself.

‘It’s this guy I know—’ Romy began.

‘Ah!’ May exclaimed, her eyes lighting up. ‘I understand. You’ve
met a chap you like who’s into the scene, and so you’re considering experimenting. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, dear,’ she said, touching Romy’s knee. ‘I think it’s wonderful that you’re opening yourself up to new experiences, exploring the whole range of human sexuality.’

And she’s off, Romy thought, smiling weakly at May.

‘Now, are you interested in being a dominant or a submissive?’ May asked.

‘Oh, well, I’m not sure I’m interested in either. I’m just … curious about the whole thing. I mean I’m not even sure if this guy is into it. He’s very secretive about his private life.’