Freeing Alex (12 page)

“I can’t breathe, I can’t bre—” I cry out as I start to hyperventilate.
I can’t get the breath into my lungs, I feel shaky and my stomach hurts. I’m
aware that people are rushing towards me, their voices sound like echoes but
not James, where’s James?

Someone from another table is bent down beside my chair as I
gasp for breath. I clutch onto the edge of the table, gripping it tightly. I
don’t know this man bent next to me. I hear someone shout for a paper bag and
then a candy pink and white striped bag is being brought towards me. Whoever
this man is, he holds my forearm and presses a paper bag to my mouth. “Breathe
into this,” he says. “Take long slow breaths, in and out, in and out. That’s
it.”

I have no idea who he is, but he’s very calm and keeps
talking to me gently, trying to calm me down. I try my hardest to regulate my
breathing but it’s not working. 

I’m conscious of my surroundings, just. Anna’s stood there,
I’m sure she’s crying; a lady has her arm around her shoulder and is talking to
her.

“I think maybe we should call an ambulance,” I hear Marcus
say.

“No need, mate.” The man standing beside me looks up to
Marcus. “I’m a doctor, I’m pretty sure this is a panic attack. Would be good if
we could move this lady somewhere a little more private, though. I think we
could try and move her now.”

I’m feeling a little calmer. The pains in my stomach have
eased a little but I still feel as though I’m struggling to breathe. Marcus and
the doctor help me up from the chair.

“We’ll go through here.” Marcus points towards a door.
“Meeting room, not being used today.”

We walk through to the meeting room off the restaurant, past
several tables of diners, all gawking at the poor woman who is having some sort
of episode. James returns just as we walk through to the meeting room.

“How are we doing?” he asks, still looking concerned.

“We’re going to be fine. I think this lady has just
experienced a panic attack, but we’re under control. Are you a relative?” The
man, who I know now to be a doctor, addresses James.

“I am,” Anna pipes up. “I’m her daughter!”

“Well, has your mum had anything like this before?” the man
claiming to be a doctor asks, but before Anna has a chance to answer, James
butts in.

“Can I have a word, please? Outside.” James indicates for
the doctor to step outside.

“Sure, leave the door open, please,” the doctor says as he
follows James.

I sit in my chair, Anna holding my hand, my breathing
steady. Marcus has gone to get fresh water and I can hear what’s being said
outside the room.

“She’s going through a
very
rough time,” I hear James
explain. “Alex owns this place, but only recently. She’s inherited it from her
aunt, she’s also divorcing her husband, lots of reasons but let’s just say he
was a bit nifty with the fists, and other things.  Anna tells me that he’s just
called her, and that he can see her, knows what she’s doing. This started just
after she cleared that call!”

There is no reply, I hear nothing, then the doctor starts to
speak in hushed tones. They assume that I can’t hear them but I can hear
everything through the crack in the door.

“I suppose a history like that would be enough to give even
the strongest of us a breakdown of some description. Has she seen anyone,
talked about it?” the doctor asks.

“I don’t think she’s seen anyone about anything. Listen,
mate, I’m the General Manager here, so I’ve only known Alex for what – six or
seven weeks max, but I knew her aunt very well and Maggie, that was her aunt,
always spoke of her very fondly, you’d think they were a lovely family. But
Alex and I, well, I suppose we’ve got something on the boil, you know…” From
James’s tone I can sense that he’s smiling.

“Yes, I know.” I can hear the doctor laugh.

“She showed me the scars. Even her daughter didn’t know, she
told me she nursed the worst one herself. The other was years ago, I think just
after her daughter was born, but she’s definitely been a punch bag. I tell you,
if I could get hold of the bastard!” I can hear the anger in James’s voice as
he talks to the doctor.

There’s a pause in the conversation, then I hear the doctor
speaking again. “Right. I’ll check on her again now, I think she’ll be okay.
Try and persuade her to see her GP though, she may benefit from seeing someone,
you know, talking to a professional.”

“I’ll try, but she’s very shut down as far as this is
concerned. Until a few days ago nobody other than her and the ex knew any of
this. Not even her daughter!” I hear James sigh.

“I see. Well, I’ll leave my card. I’m a plastics specialist,
if she wants anyone to look at the scars give me a call.”

“Great, thanks,” I hear James say.

They both come back into the meeting room, where I’m sipping
my water. I look up at James and give him a little smile and then at the man
who has helped me. “Thank you,” I say quietly. “Thank you so much.”

Then it’s yesterday all over again – I cry and crumble,
sobbing. James approaches me and kneels down beside the chair. He places his
hand on my back and starts to give it a gentle rub.

“Don’t touch me!” I yell. “Please don’t touch me!”

James backs off immediately with a look of horror. “What’s
wrong, Alex? Please tell me what’s wrong.”

“Mum… Oh God, Mum… What’s happening?” Anna is crying.

“It’s not you, James.” I look at him. “It’s not you… I’m
going to throw up…”

James moves quickly to the corner of the room, he’s like
lightning as he returns with a standard office paper bin which he places
between my knees. I bet I look like a right sight.

I hurl into the bin, the contents of my lunch now splattered
around the make-do receptacle. Anna leaves the room, but James stays, he holds
my hair back. “Can I touch you, Alex, can I hug you?”

“Umm,” I say as I hurl again.

He rubs my back whilst holding my hair back from my face.
This time I don’t tell him to leave me.

When I have finished evacuating my stomach contents, I just
sit… I’m exhausted.

“You need to rest. I think we’ll find a bed here for you,
Alex, so you can have a lie down. I’ll just go and sort a room out.” He steps
outside of the meeting room.

“Anna, can you stay with your mum? I’m just going to sort a
room, she can sleep here. You want one too? You may as well stay here tonight.”

“Yeah, sure. I was hoping that Katie and I can stay in the
hotel when she comes down tomorrow anyway, you know, if there’s a room free?”
Anna asks.

James starts to walk towards the door. He turns towards Anna
with one hand on the door handle. “When are you going back? I’ll check room
availability.”

“Wednesday morning,” she tells him.

He returns a few minutes later with two room keys, one for
me and one for Anna. We walk slowly from the meeting room and head for the
lift. He’s booked out two of the newly redesigned rooms – a twin for Anna so
that Katie can stay for the next few days, and the beautiful four-poster suite
for me.

 As we arrive on the first floor, James gives Anna her key.
“Your room’s just down there, your mum will be in here.”

“I’ll come back and check on you in a minute, is that okay?”
Anna looks so worried, so concerned.

“Okay, darling. Anna, can you go out and get some toiletries
for tomorrow? Wait a minute.” I get my purse out. “Here’s some cash, can you
pick up a toothbrush and paste, shampoo, shower gel and a bit of makeup? Oh and
you’d better call Katie and firm up the arrangements for tomorrow.” Even though
I’m in pieces I’m trying my best to stay in control, my coping mechanism, what
I’ve always done – carry on.

“Alex, stop worrying!” James huffs at me. “You need to rest,
and anyway, your rooms are full of toiletries.”

“But I like my stuff, the coconut one, please get the brand
that I like.” I know I’m flapping now.

James walks me to the room. He holds me around the waist as
we walk just a little further down the corridor to the plush new suite.
Supporting me, he opens the door and we move through to the darkened room, the
drapes nearly closed, just a slit of light creeping through.

We move to the centre of the room, to the huge bed, and he
gestures for me to sit. Then, kneeling, he removes my shoes and asks me to
stand. He deftly undoes the button of my jeans and the zip, pushing the denim
over my hips and down to my knees. “Sit,” he says. I do, and he pulls the jeans
from around my calves and ankles and folds them neatly, draping them over the
back of a chair. He undoes the buttons of my shirt, slowly, and the cuffs.
Pushing back each shoulder, he helps as I move my arms out of the sleeves.

Going to the wardrobe, he takes out a hanger and hangs my
shirt neatly. As he returns he gestures towards me to stand. I do and he takes
me in his arms, hugging me, a proper hug – not a lover’s hug, but the sort you
receive from a parent, the sort of hug that says that everything is going to be
okay. He pulls the duvet back and helps me into the huge, fabulously comfy bed.
All he ever seems to do is put me to bed!

“I want you to sleep,” he says firmly. “Just an hour or two.
I’ve asked Roger to check around the hotel, make sure that Lewis is off the
premises.”

“Will you stay?” I ask.

“I’ll need to go and cancel or rearrange the meeting I’d
planned. Anna’s popped out, like you asked her to, so I’ll get one of the girls
in the office to deal with the guy that’s coming in if I’m too late to cancel
and I’ll ask Michelle to come and sit with you while I go back to my office.
You’ll be okay with Michelle.”

“Michelle? I haven’t met her!” I must look surprised.

“The Housekeeping Manager. She was very close to Maggie. You
can talk to her, she’s lovely, you’ll like her,” he assures me.

“Oh, you won’t tell her anything, will you?” I panic.

“No, I’ll just say that you felt unwell, is that okay? Now
rest, please.

 “Umm,” I murmur as he covers me and I rest my head on the
soft pillows. “All you ever seem to do is put me to bed,” I mutter, smiling at
him.

His mouth turns up into a gorgeous grin and he places the
most tender kiss to my forehead. “It’s my pleasure – honestly.”

He tucks me up into the huge four poster and starts to
leave. “Won’t be too long.” I hear the door close.

I must find sleep very quickly as I am woken by a tap at the
door. I don’t know how long I’ve been sleeping but I feel refreshed, well, a
bit anyway. Through the door I hear, “Hello… Mrs Drake…? Hello!”

Stirring, I pull myself up. Swinging my legs out of the bed
I head towards the door. There’s a spy hole. Checking, I see a smart-looking
lady with a Reid’s badge, must be Michelle. I open the door carefully, standing
behind it as I’m only dressed in bra and knickers.

“Hello, Michelle?” I ask.

“Yes, Mrs Drake. Mr Aconi asked me to come and see you, he
said you’ve not been well.” She looks concerned.

I wave my arm into the room. “Thanks, come on in. I feel a
little better now, amazing what sleep, just a quick nap, can do!”

“I know. Shall I make us a cuppa?” She walks right on into
my room and heads directly for the tea and coffee.

I pluck the white waffle robe from a coat hanger, drape it
around myself and loosely tie the cord. “That would be great, I’ll just grab a
robe.” 

“Tea or coffee?” she asks.

“Tea, please – strong, dash of milk and one sugar.”

“Very precise!” She smiles.

“Umm. I’m funny about my tea, has to be just so.”

She laughs, I’m warming to her already. Michelle must be
fifty, and she’s wearing the standard hotel issue uniform black skirt, white
blouse and black jacket. She has her Reid’s hotel badge on her left lapel with
her name and her title. Her blonde hair is pulled back into a neat chignon and
her blue eyes sparkle, she’s very little makeup, and as I would expect for her
position, she wears very sensible black flat shoes.

She passes me the cup of tea, it looks perfect.

“Thank you.” I take the tea and sit on the edge of the bed.
She really can make the most excellent tea. “So, how long have you been here?”
I ask.

Her mouth twitches to one side as she thinks about her
answer. “Oh, it must be, what… fourteen or fifteen years now, I suppose, a long
time.”

I smile. “You like working here, then?” 

“Would I have stayed all this time if I didn’t?”

“I suppose not. James said you were friendly with Maggie.” I
need to find someone who knew her, knew her better than I did.

She takes a deep breath, I’m sure I spot a tear in her eyes.
“Yes, Maggie and I were very good friends, really close, for a long time.” She
pauses, taking a drink. “Maggie hired me all those years ago as an assistant
manager but when my boss, the old Housekeeping Manager left, Maggie offered me
the job. I suppose I’d been here about four years at that point. Soon after we
became friends, I think because we just got along well with each other,” she
explains.

I look up from my drink, looking directly at her. “I didn’t
know her that well. You do know she was my aunt?” 

“Yes, I did know, she told me a little about you.” She
hesitates when she answers.

I take a drink of my hot tea and look over at this woman who
claims to have been a good friend of Maggie’s. “Whenever she’d visit it would
be when I was at school, she’d always gone when I came home. I mean, I know
what my mum used to say about Maggie and I thought I knew her quite well from
the things my mum said. I knew she was professional, a career woman, and I knew
she did well for herself, but other than that I knew very little. Still, I’m
certainly learning a lot more about her now that she’s not here!”

Michelle laughs, wiping the stray tear away from her cheek.
“She was great… I know all about you.” She looks down at her drink. “I probably
shouldn’t have said that. Sorry,” she apologises, clearly knowing more about me
than she’s letting on.