Authors: Nova Weetman
Chapter 34
Joely can't find anyone she knows. There are so many faces, so many strangers, and everyone seems to have someone. She can't believe how hard it is to see. How's she going to find Rory when there's no light?
âJoely, have you seen Frankie?' says Thommo as he walks up to where Joely's standing.
âI can't see anyone.'
âShe went looking for you.'
Joely likes hearing that, likes imagining her friend checking each face as she wanders in the dark. Thommo shuffles on the grass and Joely can't believe how pathetic he looks. Obviously he has a huge crush on her friend and he has no idea that Frankie would never be interested in him. Just as Joely's about to tell him, Frankie skips up with her coat on her arm.
âThere you are, Joely,' she says. âIt's a crazy party! There's so many people!'
âI stole a couple of Dad's beers. Do you want one?' Thommo pulls out two stubbies from the pockets of his shorts.
Frankie laughs. âClassy. Want to share, Joel?'
âNo thanks.'
âCool. I'll have it.'
Thommo takes off the top, and Frankie starts drinking fast.
âWarm beer! Cheers,' she says.
Thommo taps his beer against Frankie's and Joely has that feeling of being outside it all again. Of watching and never being the one in the middle. She needs to find Rory and kiss him before he can forget her completely. Start the new year properly.
Frankie drinks more of her beer. âAny resolutions?'
âTo escape,' says Thommo.
Frankie laughs. âWhat are you escaping?'
âThis place.'
âIt's not so bad. I like it here,' argues Frankie.
âYou don't live here.'
âMaybe I will. Maybe I'll move here. It's not like Mum cares where I live.' Frankie sculls the rest of her beer.
âYou wouldn't move here, would you?' says Joely, not sure if her friend is winding her up.
Frankie shrugs and drops the empty bottle on the ground. âI need another beer. Let's dance!'
Frankie tries to grab Joely's hands, but Joely pulls away. She doesn't want to dance. It's weird when nobody else is, and besides, the music isn't really dancing music. Frankie gives up and floats away, moving to her own beat. Joely watches her go, wondering what's going on in her friend's head.
Frankie dances in circles. She doesn't care about the party behind her or worry if anyone is watching. She just wants to move out here in the paddock where there are just the stars for company.
As she dances further away from the party, she feels someone slinking up behind her. She turns and sees Rory. He grabs her hand, spinning her like a ballerina.
âAre you having your own party?'
âI'm dancing with the fairies.'
âAre you pissed?'
Frankie lets go of his hand and keeps spinning, almost wishing that he hadn't appeared and ruined her moment.
âNope.' She stops dancing and stares at him. âGo away.'
âYou don't mean that.'
âYeah, I do,' she says.
He starts dancing with her, pulling her tight, and she realises she's never felt afraid like this before. Except sometimes with her mum's boyfriends. She can't think about Rory's body. It's too close. So she thinks about her own and what he can see in the dark. Then he kisses her and all the doubts rush away.
He drops her coat to the ground and pulls her down.
His hands go up her dress, grabbing her. It's not great, the
grabbing. It's like he thinks he knows what he's doing, but it's nowhere near as good as when she does it herself. She likes the way he kisses though. But everything else is a disappointment. And she's worried about her coat lying on the scratchy grass. Frankie wonders why her mum bothers with all those men if this is all she gets. She wonders if being with Thommo would be like this. She pushes Rory off, preferring to see the stars.
âWhy are you stopping?' he says, rolling onto his back.
âI dunno,' says Frankie even though she does.
âThought we were going to ⦠you know â¦' He sounds like a surly little kid and Frankie wants to tease him.
âWhat?'
âDo it,' he says finally.
It's all she needs to hear; his big plans for the evening. She's glad he told her now though because she would have hated finding out later. âDo what?' she says, mocking him. Frankie laughs in the dark, wondering why some boys never learn.
He lights a cigarette. As he blows out the smoke he whispers, âFuck.'
She wishes she was with Thommo rather than with a boy who thinks he'll score just because she's from the city and she wears short skirts. As she finds the saucepan constellation she tries to work out how to tell Rory nicely that she's not that sort of girl.
âFrankie â¦'
She hears a voice calling her name from a distance. She jumps up, fast. Rory tries to pull her down again, but Frankie pushes him away. âNo,' she whispers.
âIt's just Thommo or Mack.'
She hopes that it is Thommo, hopes that he's come looking for her.
âFrankie â¦' the voice calls again, sounding closer. She grabs her coat and starts running towards the voice. When she's closer to the party, she sees him. He hurries over and nearly collides into her.
âThommo!'
âI was worried,' he says, looking away from her.
âI was just walking.'
âAlone?'
She looks at him and nods. He smiles and looks relieved.
âI just thought â¦'
âWhat? I was dancing with the fairies.'
âRight. Fairies.'
âYeah,' she says, daring him to disagree. But he smiles like he knows exactly what she means.
âYou having fun, Thommo?'
âYeah. Nah. I hate these parties. Everyone just gets pissed. And then they'll all go swimming in the dam or end up in a fight.'
âSounds awesome,' says Frankie.
Thommo doesn't answer. Frankie can tell he doesn't know what to say to her, so she takes his hand and starts dragging him to the edge of the party, where it's darker. She lets go, but he doesn't. Then he lets go as she grabs his hand again. They both laugh, embarrassed.
Suddenly, there's a loud whistle behind them. Mack leaps on his brother's back and grabs him hard around the neck. Thommo bucks him off.
âWhat are you two doing?' says Mack.
âTalking,' says Frankie.
âOh yeah. I saw you holding hands.'
Frankie laughs at him. âAre you spying on us, Mack?'
âNo. Just saw you that's all.'
âWe were just talking. Okay?'
âDidn't think it was anything else. Thommo's not really your type, is he?' says Mack coldly.
Frankie doesn't know what to say. She waits for Thommo to say something, but he turns away, leaving her to deal with his brother. She's angry with them both. âThommo's my friend. Get over it,' says Frankie.
Mack snorts like it's the funniest thing he's ever heard. âFriend? Hear that, Thommo? Not like Macleod. He's not your friend, is he, Frankie?'
âFuck off, Mack!' yells Frankie.
âHappily.' He swaggers back to the party and then yells back at them, âBut I'd stay away from her, Thommo. She's bad news!'
Frankie turns to Thommo. His eyes look so sad that she looks away from him. He walks off, leaving Frankie alone in the dark.
Chapter 35
Mack wants to smash something or someone. First Frankie played him and now Thommo. He crashes through a group of kids younger than him. One of them swears as Mack knocks his beer to the ground. Mack whirls around ready to fight, until he sees that it's just the kid who never gets a kick on Saturday at footy cos he's so slow. He picks up the beer and keeps walking, looking for a better target. Then he sees her.
âAnna.' Mack steps close, smelling the perfume on her skin.
âYou look happy tonight, Mack,' she says in her usual way.
He takes in all the changes on her face. The new lipstick, the second piercing in her ear and the expression. He wishes he'd been better the first time around. Maybe it's not too late. âWanna go for a walk?'
She laughs.
âWhat's so funny?'
âYou having girl trouble?' She takes his beer and drinks some.
He shakes his head. âMaybe I just miss you.'
âToo late for that.'
He snatches his beer back. âWhy?'
She smiles and he wants to kiss her so badly it hurts. âI'm hanging out with Rory.'
He can feel fury surge through him again like electricity. âBullshit,' he says. âHe's been screwing Joely's friend.'
âI don't believe you.' Even in the dark, Mack can see how angry she is.
âHe's been fucking her all week. So you don't mean much, do you,' he says, making it as cruel as he can, wanting to bring her down hard.
âFuck you, Mack. I wouldn't take you back anyway.'
He can't stand it, this feeling, like he's exploding inside. He storms past Anna, bashing into her shoulder, and bangs through the party, pushing people, searching for the face who is going to answer to all of this shit.
Chapter 36
As Joely slips in the darkness, she sees him. Her heart's racing
as she sneaks up. She reaches up and slides her hands over
his eyes, then leans against his back, feeling the strength of his
muscles through his shirt. He spins around and smiles, but not as brightly as she'd hoped. But then it's hard to see properly in the dark.
âWhat do you think of the party?' says Rory.
âIt's great. I've never been to a party like this,' says Joely.
âIt's not. It's dull. It's the same people, playing the same music, talking the same crap.'
âWhy do you come then?'
âI was hoping you'd be here,' Rory answers.
âOh,' says Joely, bursting.
He leans over and kisses her, sliding his hands onto her shoulders. Only half aware of the kiss, she worries about her blisters and hopes he doesn't find them too disgusting. He pushes her onto the ground, kissing her neck. She hopes nobody is watching and wonders where Frankie is.
Rory is half lying on her now. He starts undoing her bra, but it must catch because he can't get it unclipped. Joely's not sure about this. It's too fast, too much. Then she feels her bra strap go loose and his hands are grabbing her boobs, and she wonders if it's supposed to feel like this or better.
Then he stops.
âWhat's wrong?' says Joely.
He sits up, moving away from her. She wants the moment back, but doesn't know how to start it. She touches his arm gently. Instead of responding, he stands and starts walking away. âI'll see you later, Joely.'
âLater? As in on the road?'
âYeah.'
âAfter the party!' she calls after him, but he doesn't answer.
Joely lies back. She doesn't know what just happened. Maybe it was her blisters. Or maybe Frankie lied to her about the dress and she doesn't look good in it at all. But Frankie wouldn't do that. She might not reveal all her secrets, but she never lies about things like dresses. Frankie would know what to do if a boy she liked stopped kissing her and walked away. But she can't very well ask Frankie because then she'd have to tell her about Rory, and she doesn't want to upset her. She looks up at the stars, trying to remember which ones are the important ones. But they all bleed into one big constellation.
Rory's never felt like this. He's never wanted a girl so bad. Never. He doesn't understand what's happening to him. He can't even fool around with Joely because she's not Frankie. Perhaps he should find Anna and see how that goes, but just the thought of being with her leaves him cold.
âMacleod!' Someone yells his name and he's pretty sure he knows who it is. Fuck it. A fight might be just what he needs.
Chapter 37
Joely walks back towards the dam, wondering if it's nearly midnight and nearly the new year. She suddenly wishes she was with her best friend. And then it's like Frankie just knows because, in the next second, Frankie grabs her hand.
âThere you are,' says Frankie, smothering her with a hug. âAre you okay?'
Joely doesn't know how to answer. âYes,' she finally says. âIs it almost twelve?
Before Frankie can answer, there's a scream and a yell and a massive pack of bodies swarm towards them. It's like a huddle of wild, bucking animals. Joely grabs Frankie's hand and they move back, stopping at the fringes where the other people are watching.
âAre they fighting?' says Joely, feeling torn between watching and running. Her whole body is tense.
âYeah.'
âWhy?'
A girl shoots a look at Joely. âMack started it.'
âCan't you stop him?' says Joely, hating the idea that they're all just watching and doing nothing.
âNah. If he wants to fight, let him,' the girl says and laughs, turning back to her friends.
Frankie is trying to see if she can spot Thommo as the bodies thump into each other, arms punching and legs kicking. She can hear someone yelling and grunting. It's like watching bulls fight. She wonders how it will stop if they are all so close to each other, hanging on, pushing each other back and forth.
Someone comes running across the paddock. It's Thommo. Frankie hopes he's running to her, but he passes them and keeps running, straight into the side of the pack. He smashes them with huge force, sending them all into the dam. One falls and then another. The girls edge nearer, waiting to see what happens next.
âIs that Rory?' Joely says and claps her hands over her mouth.
âDunno,' says Frankie, not wanting to admit she knows who it is. She wonders if the fight is because of her.
They watch as Rory and Mack walk out of the water, heads hanging, arms by their sides. They both look broken.
Joely starts edging towards them. âI'm just going to check on Mack and Thommo.'
âNah. Leave it,' says Frankie. âJust leave it.'
Suddenly, there's a loud crack and the sky explodes in tiny lights.
âFireworks!' yells Frankie. Purple smoke fills the sky. There's another crack and the sky ignites. âIt's beautiful!'
Joely pulls her back, away from where the boys are lighting them on the ground. âYou have to sit back here. They have no idea what they're doing.'
Frankie smiles and kisses Joely. âHappy New Year, my gorgeous friend!' says Frankie feeling drunk even though she's only had one and a half beers. It must be the hot air, the night, the fireworks.
âYou okay, Frank?' says Joely.
âI'm great! I'm just so glad I'm here! In Payne. With you!'
âMe too!' Joely yells back.
Frankie jumps up and drags Joely with her, making her friend dance and swirl, as the sky erupts over and over, raining down shooting stars.
Joely wants to tell Frankie about kissing Rory, but she has no way of saying it, even though she can feel the words forming in her mouth. She wishes he'd appear, grab her around the waist, and dance with her in front of her best friend, so Frankie could see that Joely was wanted too.
Then someone shouts, âTen! Nine!' and Frankie and Joely join in counting down the last precious seconds of the year. âEight! Seven! Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! ONE!'
âHappy New Year!' Frankie screams to the people all around her jumping and hugging and kissing. Suddenly, there are so many people Frankie can't find Joely.
Then she sees Thommo walking towards her, and she starts to smile, but a girl grabs his hand, Maggie, the girl from the cinema, with her curls and her cute dress. Thommo looks through the crowd right at Frankie, and then kisses Maggie.
Frankie turns away, upset, just as Rory comes out of nowhere and kisses her hard like the whole night is her fault. She pushes him away, not wanting his kiss to mean the beginning of her new year. And, as she looks up past him, worried that Thommo has seen them, instead, she sees Joely staring straight at her.