Framed and Hung
Authors: Alexis Fleming
Framed and Hung
Alexis Fleming
Framed and Hung
Alexis Fleming
Job satisfaction has never been this good…
If there’s one thing Zoe Chandler, Historical Restorations expert, knows, it’s that naked bankers aren’t supposed to look like Greek gods. Honestly, it’s enough to make any woman pause. Luckily, Zoe is more of a take-charge, rush-in-where-angels-fear-to-tread kind of girl, and she definitely has fantasies of rushing towards Jake. But Jake is a man who is all about control, and there’s no way he’s going to let Zoe run this show.
Nude paintings, blackmail, and mind-numbing sexual frustration…will either of them survive this project?
Multi-published author Alexis Fleming’s first book was a bedtime story for her children called Sammy the Snail, written and illustrated totally in crayon. She hooked her children in and created a new career for herself, a career that gives her immense satisfaction and a lot of fun. She now writes her own bedtime stories, but be warned — they are strictly adults only!
Alexis’s first love has always been romance, whether on this world or the next. Hot, sizzling relationships with a dash of comedy and a few trials and tribulations thrown in to test her characters. Alexis writes sassy, fun erotic contemporaries, as well as paranormals and fantasies where you’ll find yourself coming face to face with anything from sexy shifters to beings from other planets.
When she isn’t tied to her computer, Alexis walks the beautiful beaches of Hervey Bay, or watches the farmer across from her house bring his cattle out to graze. The best of both worlds. What more could any writer ask for?
Alexis believes you can never have too many friends and loves to hear from her readers. You can visit Alexis at
www.alexisfleming.net
, email her at
[email protected]
, or join her newsletter group:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/AlexisFlemingandFriends
. You’ll also find her on Facebook at
https://www.facebook.com/alexisfleming
.
My thanks to Kate for your gentle and diplomatic handling of paranoid writers, this one in particular. You do it so well.
And to Valerie for your support, wise advice and continued love. Bats rule!
This one is for Kelly and Steve. Over the last couple of years, you have both used your own unique skills to keep my head pointing in the right direction. I am blessed to have you in my life. I love you guys.
Contents
Bestselling Titles by Escape Publishing…
‘Good evening, Lord. I’d ask you how it’s hanging, but I guess I can see the answer for myself.’ A gurgle of laughter accompanied the comment. ‘Now
that’s
what I call a resurrection.’
Jake jerked his head up and stumbled backwards, catching his balance at the last moment. The open mobile phone in his hand forgotten, he propped his fists on his hips and glared across at the person standing on the back patio. ‘Oi, what the hell do you think you’re doing?’
Damn kids
. It was a good thing he’d moved in today rather than wait until the decorating was finished. Otherwise, God only knows what he would have found. Probably a whole group of teenagers shacking up in his mother’s new home.
‘Not exactly what I’d expect from a fine, upstanding banker,’ another voice, definitely female, commented, although a flowering shrub on the edge of the patio hid the person from view.
‘Oh, I don’t know.’ The owner of the first voice tilted her head on one side and stared across at him. ‘Hmm, it
is
rather…impressive, and it’s definitely upstanding. Well, sort of. Wonder how much incentive it’d need to snap to attention.’
Jake shook his head. What the hell were they going on about? ‘This is private property.’
For the moment, anyway
. ‘You’re trespassing,’ he ground out through clenched teeth.
‘If that’s the case, what are
you
doing here?’ The female hooked her fingers into the top of the skimpy hipster shorts she had on and sauntered towards the edge of the patio. Cocky was how he would have described the attitude she projected. ‘You’re a bit old for squatting, aren’t you?’
‘Old?
Old
? I’ll have you know…’ Jake let the words peter out. He gritted his teeth and tried to get his thoughts in order. Christ, he was arguing with a kid. She couldn’t have been much more than 16, 17.
No more than five foot two, maybe five three at most, the interloper took the single step down from the patio and strutted over to him, a smile plastered on her face. A tight T-shirt showed off a decent set of breasts — at least a mouthful — and hugged a slender waist.
She’d tied her blonde hair up in pigtails either side of an elfin face, the features delicate, but with a hint of strength in the tapered jaw. Sensual lips curved into an enticing grin that invited you to share the moment with her, as if she held a secret that she just knew you’d enjoy.
Heat swept through him and his lower body tightened in reaction. Jesus, Drew wasn’t far off the mark. He needed to get a life. Here he was, fantasising about a freakin’ teenager, for crying out loud. Hell, he’d turned into a degenerate. Maybe his mother and brothers were right.
All work and no play makes Jake a dull boy
.
Or at least a twisted pervert.
‘I wish you kids would learn some decency instead of turning up where you’re not welcome. You know you’re breaking the law right now, don’t you?’
‘Decency, Lord?’ As she strutted along the path that led to the spa, she let loose with a hearty burst of laughter. ‘You have the balls to lecture me about decency and you’re standing there starkers? Oh, that’s priceless.’
With a cheeky grin, she allowed her gaze to track downwards. ‘And talking about balls — ’
‘Frickin’ hell.’ Jake looked down and suddenly remembered what he’d been about to do before she’d arrived. He spun around and jumped down into the spa behind him, submerging himself up to his neck. Water splashed in a wide arc and his little trespasser wore the brunt of it.
Heat flared in his face and he had no doubt he glowed like a neon sign. A red one. Crap, how the hell could he have forgotten he was bare-assed naked?
‘And it’s
Mr
Lord to you,’ he grumbled to try to cover his embarrassment.
Shit, that wasn’t the only thing he should cover. He hadn’t turned the jets on and he’d bet his last dollar his body was visible through the crystal-clear water.
Guess he should be grateful the spa had been set into the ground instead of one of those free-standing ones. Otherwise, he would have done himself an injury climbing up to get into it.
The little sprite pranced over and dropped to her knees on the grass that ringed the spa. She reached over the coping and dabbled her fingers in the water. For a moment, he was distracted and then he remembered the totally naked bit and thrust his hands down to cover his lower body.
A small, hard object connected with the tip of what had grown to be a respectable erection. He winced in reaction. Lifting one hand, he stared at the drowned mobile phone. Oh, hell.
‘Son, you should know phones don’t work well in water. Who were you talking to anyway?’
Now
that
was a voice he knew. He shook his head. Trust his mother to turn up right now. And here he’d thought things couldn’t get any worse.
He ground his teeth and slapped his hand to his forehead. Problem was, he still clutched the dead phone in his fist.
Head, meet hard object. Hard object, this is head
.
Shame it wasn’t a
hard
head. With a hastily bitten-off curse, he snapped the phone closed and tossed it over the side of the spa before rubbing at the resultant lump on his forehead.
By now, his mother had collected the other woman from the patio and waddled down to join the teenager by the spa. Although, now he looked closer at said teenager, maybe she wasn’t as young as he’d thought.
He frowned. For a moment, he almost thought he knew her. Had he met her before? He shook his head. Nah, not possible.
‘Ah, Zoe? I’d be careful playing in the water if I were you.’ His mother gave a little giggle. ‘You never know what you might catch.’
Jake closed his eyes and waited. He never knew what his mother would come out with next. Talk about foot in mouth disease. All she did was open her mouth long enough to change feet. His brothers and he were used to it by now, but it was damned embarrassing at times.
‘Promises, promises.’ The female — Zoe? — chuckled and dragged her fingers through the water. ‘Hey, I might find me a little treasure if I keep fishing.’
‘Oh no, dear. The Lord men are never little. Far from it. They’re all rather well-hung.’
‘
Mother.
’ Jake shook his head. This couldn’t be happening. He wanted to bang his head against the fibreglass side of the spa, but he very well may shake loose what little brains he had left.
‘Yes, dear?’ His mother gave him a wide-eyed innocent look.
He suddenly wanted to burst out laughing. She was incorrigible. He’d seen her use the same look on his dad when she’d felt he was getting too pompous for his own good. It used to stop his father in his tracks every time.
‘Um, want to hit the button to turn on the bubbles?’ He gave her a sheepish look.
He’d been sitting with his shoulders hunched in an effort to hide some of his body. It was a relief to sit up straight when the swirling bubbles clouded the water somewhat. Just to be on the safe side though, he continued to cover his crown jewels.
Zoe leaned farther into the spa, her hand sweeping lower through the water, her breasts supported by the rim at the top. Jake found his gaze captured by the damp fabric of her top and the hint of dark areolas showing through. He gulped as her nipples tightened to hard little buds under his prolonged look.
Raising his head, he caught the gamin grin on her face. She arched one eyebrow as if daring him to say something.
Damn it to hell, she was laughing at him. Hadn’t he made a big enough idiot of himself already?
He dared a look at the other woman. She was totally different from Zoe. Taller, with strawberry blonde hair tied up in a ponytail. The only thing that wasn’t different was the grin on her face. Hell, he needed to retrieve some ground here.
Wrapping his dignity about him like a cloak, he glared at his mother. ‘Don’t you think it’s time you told me what you’re all doing out here? I figured I’d have the place to myself.’
Jessie Lord, 65 years’ worth of kick-ass spunk wrapped up in a five-foot, cuddly frame, crossed her arms over her chest and cocked one hip. Jake tried not to grin. Silver-white hair tinted a strange shade of blue notwithstanding, she looked quite formidable when she frowned like that. More like a little general than a mother, let alone a grandmother to his brothers Nathan and Drew’s brood of munchkins.
‘What are
you
doing here, Jake?’
He shrugged. ‘I thought I should move in and keep a check on the painters while the work’s being done. This place is full of valuable antiques. Never know what these guys will get up to when you turn your back.’
Zoe pushed herself up onto her knees and planted her fists on her hips. The elfin grin on her face morphed into a fierce scowl that she aimed at Jake. ‘I’ll have you know — ’
Jessie cut her off when she leaned down and slapped Jake on the shoulder. ‘You mind what you’re saying, my boy. Now, why don’t I make some introductions? This here is Rachel Morton.’ She gestured to the woman who stood beside her. ‘And that is Zoe Chandler.’
‘Pleased to meet you, ladies. You…ah, you think we could continue this later?’ He squirmed on the seat, checking the placement of his hands to make certain nothing was showing. Crap, at this rate the old fella was going to be a shrivelled-up, waterlogged mess by the time he got out of here.