Forsaking Truth (9 page)

Gripping the back of
his neck, he stared blankly at his lap. Visions of Tristan’s hands, eyes, lips,
arms, and hair
bombarded him. He could still conjure
the incredible scent of his skin, recall the unmatchable feel of his mouth. Yet
he had no recollection of Tiffany’s body from the night before.

Probably because every time you fucked
her you had your eyes screwed shut
and were imagining
someone else.

No. That wasn’t true.
But it was.

He hit the wheel again
and cursed. He just needed to get over this. He’d fuck everything with tits
until the sheep were scared, if that’s what it took. He was Luke fucking
McCullough for
fuck sake. McCullough men were virile,
potent, and strong, not fucking pansies.

The following six
weeks followed the same format. Tristan had mastered everything at the yard,
including organizing the tool room better than anyone else e
ver had. Meanwhile, Luke was losing himself in a revolving
door of pussy and on the brink of having a major meltdown.

His eyes stared out
the windshield as the female head adorned with blond curls bobbed over his
cock. He focused on the security lights at
the back
of O’Malley’s as his own head rested on the back of the seat and his beer
dangled from his fingers hanging out the window.

Slurping sounds and
soft keening noises rose up to his ears every few minutes, but other than that
he could have been at the
dentist for all the
pleasure he was feeling. Tanya or Tina or whatever was doing a fine job. She
got an A for effort, but Luke really didn’t give a shit if she finished or left
him like that.

The back door of the
bar opened and Kelly stepped out hauling a
bag of
trash to the dumpster. He paused when he saw Luke’s truck and shook his head.
His brother hurled the bag into the bin and slowly approached.

Kelly’s palm banged
twice on the hood. “Wrap it up. This ain’t no disco. This ain’t no country club
either.
And this sure as fuck ain’t L.A. so either
get a room or say goodnight.”

That blond head popped
up, eyes wide and lips glossy. She dragged her hand over her mouth and cursed.
Kelly raised a brow, but kept his distance.

“You better pack it
up,
sweetheart,” Luke suggested without emotion.

“Isn’t that your
brother?” she asked.

“Yeah, but he makes
the rules here. How about I call you tomorrow?”

“You don’t have my
number.”

Because he didn’t want
it. He slid her his phone. “Plug it in.”

Dainty little
fingers moved over his phone. “There. Now you have it.”
Smiling, she pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Sorry we couldn’t finish. Tomorrow
you can come to my place.”

Not likely. “Sounds
like a plan.”

As she slid out the
passenger door, Luke stuffed himself bac
k in his
pants, lifting his hips to right his zipper. He wasn’t even fully hard. Once
Curls made it back to her Ford Focus, Kelly approached his window and tapped
his beer.

“You can’t have beer
outside the bar. You know that, Luke.” Ignoring his brother, h
e took another swig. “What’s going on, Luke? You were bad
before, but now you’re worse. It’s a different girl every week.”

He scoffed. “Like you
can talk. I have yet to meet someone who hasn’t made your acquaintance.”

“That’s different.
They know what they
’re getting with me. I make sure
they enjoy themselves.”

“I haven’t gotten any
complaints.”

“That’s because you’re
gone the second you finish. I hear them talkin’. Even saw a few of them cry.”

Luke should feel bad,
but he didn’t. “I ain’t forcing nobody. I
can’t help
it if they’re easy.”

“That’s fucked up and
you know it. When are you gonna stop acting like a prick and go back to the old
Luke?”

The old Luke was gone
and never coming back. “Do yourself a favor, Kelly, and stop waiting for me to
be something
I’m not. The sooner all of you accept
this is who I am, the sooner we can all get on with this shitty thing called
life.”

“I’m cutting you off.”

His eyes cut to his
brother’s and saw steely determination he wasn’t used to finding there. What
did he know? H
e was still a kid.

Finishing his beer he
shoved it in Kelly’s direction. His brother caught the bottle and Luke started
the truck, pulling away before Kelly could give him shit for drinking and
driving. He didn’t need to listen to that crap. He backed out
of the lot and drove until the sun came up the following
morning.

Sunday morning he went
with his family to church. Luke wasn’t a bad guy. And once his sodden brain
dried out, he didn’t like the cloudy memories he’d created over the last few
wee
ks.

Sheilagh sat beside
him in the pew as Father Mark carried on with his homily. She looked different,
refined or something. Her makeup wasn’t as all over the place as it usually was
and she didn’t seem to radiate awkwardness. This summer had definitely
changed her. She was growing up.

His mom and dad sat
side by side before them and Luke knew without looking that they were holding
hands. That was right. That was what love looked like. Kelly, as usual, wasn’t
there, but Finn was.

He and Erin sat
motionless across the aisle. He wondered how long until his
twin married his high school sweetheart. She was cute, but not much of a prize.
She sort of bossed Finnegan around and undervalued him. Luke didn’t know why
his brother didn’t tell her to knock it
off.

His gaze moved to the
back of the church. There was his Aunt Rosemarie, Ryan, and Pat. No Tristan. He
saw Tristan from time to time at O’Malley’s and avoided him whenever at work.
Twice, his presence at the bar had spurred Luke to openly proposition
whatever female was next to him and twice the repercussions
had left him with an acidic sensation in his gut.

Tristan wasn’t shy
about watching him. His mouth never quirked in a smile when he was around. His
eyes were always focused, seeing, and scrutinizi
ng.
Luke knew he was a prick to flaunt other hookups in his presence, but it had to
happen. Tristan had to understand Luke was straight and whatever they shared
meant nothing but too many beers.

That was bullshit. He
fucking dreamt about the guy. Not just
in a sexual
sense either. He dreamt of them hanging out, driving in his truck, and lying
close in the warmth of his bed.

When Tristan was
around, Luke couldn’t help but stand to attention. His neck prickled with
awareness and his pulse quickened and then t
here was
the way his body hardened every time he sensed his presence. It was fucking
killing him.

Dear God, make it end. Either make the
feelings go away or let me end this miserable existence.

Things were getting so
bad he didn’t even want to go to work.
Ryan had
started, and he and Tristan had a great friendship that grated on Luke’s last
nerve. His cousin didn’t seem to give a shit if Tristan fucked women, men, or
goats for that matter. To Ryan, he was just Tristan and that was enough.

None of the other
guys at the yard appeared to know about Tristan’s
orientation. Whenever the topic of sex came up, he seemed to roll with the
punches like any straight man would. He didn’t have to like tits in order to
comment that they were big. He tossed out a comment h
ere
and there and that alleviated any possible questioning glances, which never
came.

When mass ended he
went to his truck. “Luke, can I get a ride back with you?”

He turned and found
Sheilagh at his heels. “Yeah. Where’s your car?”

“The belt broke
again.”

They climbed into his
truck and he backed out. Once the parade of church traffic dissipated, he took
the back road home.

“Can I ask you
something?” Sheilagh said in a small voice that sounded nothing like her usual
one.

“Sure.”

“Do you think I’m
pretty?”

“I think you’re
beautiful, Sheilagh. Why? Do I need to kick someone’s ass?”

“No. It’s just… I like
this guy and whenever I see him around he doesn’t seem to notice me.”

“Then he’s an idiot.”

“I think it’s because
I’m immature.”

He glanced at her then
retur
ned his eyes to the road. “You’re going through
a tough stage. You’re almost an adult, but still very much a child. Don’t get
pissed. It’s true and we’ve all been there. Before you know it, you’ll get a
handle on all these new feelings. You’ll understand y
our
body is its own work of art. And that guy will eventually see he’s either got a
shot at the best girl in Center County or he missed his chance, because she’s
found someone better. Just don’t go giving it away for free. You make them work
for it, you he
ar? And if any guy gets a little too
fresh, you tell me. You got five older brothers. A guy would have to be a
complete sadist to treat you wrong.” He paused and frowned. “Scratch that.
Maybe you should just hold off for a while on the boy stuff.”

She snor
ted. “Like the rest of you held off on the girl stuff? I’m
not deaf, Luke. I hear about you and Kelly.”

He inwardly flinched
at being placed in the same category as his reprobate brother, Kelly. With
three other brothers to emulate, Kelly’s behavior toward
women was probably the least flattering. “Just…just keep your legs
shut.”

“Ew! Please stop
talking now.”

They were silent for a
moment. God, was Sheilagh having
sex already? “Do you know what an STD looks like? You should look it up on the
internet.”

“Wh
at?”

He couldn’t stop
thinking about his little sister having sex and he needed to make sure she
didn’t. Ever. “Then there’s pregnancy. After that your life and dreams come
second and your body’s never the same.”

She scoffed. “And you
know this because you
’ve carried how many babies to
term? Jesus, Luke, I thought we could talk about this seriously. I should have
gone to Kelly.”

“Do
not
get dating advice from
Kelly.” That would be a huge mistake. Kelly slept with anything female.
Yeah,
sort of like you’ve b
een doing.
Damn it! He gritted his teeth. “Fine. We
can talk about this. What do you want to know?”

“Really?”

“Yes, but keep it PG.”

“What do guys find
attractive in women?”

“Brains.”

“Luke!”

“I’m serious.
Intelligence is the greatest turn on. Nothing’s sexier than a smart girl. A
smart
virgin
girl.”

“I’ll ignore that last
comment. What
physical
traits do guys find sexy?”

He let out a slow
rumbling breath. “A smile is usually the first thing I
notice. If a girl’s frowning I tend to think she’s a bitch.”

“Maybe she’s just
sad.”

“Maybe.”

“What else?” she
asked.

He thought for a
minute. What did he find sexy? Broad shoulders, toned arms, capable calloused
hands. Fuck. “Boobs.”

Sheilagh frowned, her
chin dipped as she peeked down her blouse. “Do you think a
certain color hair is pretty?”

Yes. Brown hair with
sun bleached highlights, long, down to the shoulders, and tied back so he could
see the hard line of Tristan’s jaw and every flex of his throat.
“Hair’s hair.”

“Do you think red hair
is ugly?”

He scowled and faced
his sister then turned his focus back to the road. “No, I don’t think red hair
is ugly. What the fuck, Shei? Every woman in my family is practically a red
head and I think they’re all
beautiful. Who’s putting
this shit in your head?”

“No one. I’m trying to
figure out why no one sees me.”

“Maybe they see too
much of you. Try reeling it in a bit.”

“I have been. I hate
that I’m always the loud one. I’ve been trying to act a little more…cla
ssy.”

“Well, classy might be
pushing it. You are, after all, a McCullough. Just be yourself and when the
right guy notices you, it’ll be because who you’re naturally attractive to him.
No one wants to be in a relationship with someone fake.”

“Do you think
age matters?”