Forgiving Jackson (34 page)

“But don’t we need to show our tickets?” Emory asked.

Gwen laughed and gave a little wave as they parted company. This wasn’t her first rodeo, while Emory had never even seen a bronco.

Emory followed Warren through a side door and then a labyrinth of hallways.

“We’re almost there,” he said, and sure enough, there were more and more people in evidence, darting in and out of doors and yelling instructions at each other. Suddenly, there was a loud commotion and a group of about a dozen people moved like an amoeba through a door. She caught sight of a cowboy hat and looked down until her eyes glanced a face.

“Was that—?”

“Yes. He never arrives until the last minute. Drives his people crazy.”

Emory wondered if Jackson was driving his people crazy.

“Here we are,” Warren stopped outside a door. “He’s in the Johnny Cash dressing room. You can go in. I’ll wait out here for you.”

“Why do you need to wait for me?”

“I’m your bodyguard for the evening.”

What?
“I don’t need a bodyguard.”

“I have my instructions.”

• • •

Jackson could not have been more surprised when he saw what Emory was wearing. He laughed out loud with delight. He wasn’t sure what he had expected but not sleek, silky black pants topped by a slinky, bright, sapphire blue sleeveless top covered from hip to shoulder in spangles and sequins.

He threw off the people around him who’d been nattering in his ear and made a beeline for her.

“You look so beautiful!” When he kissed her, he noticed she was taller. And small wonder. She was wearing a pair of strappy, jewel-encrusted shoes with four-inch heels. He leaned into her ear. “Do you think you could wear those shoes for me later?
Just
the shoes?”

She blushed a pretty little blush and smoothed her hand over her hip. “You don’t think it’s too much? Gwen said people would be dressed up so we went shopping … but I didn’t know.”

“Too much? Honey, you’re fixing to see ‘too much.’ But you’re going to show them what classy looks like—well, sparkly classy.” What she needed was some sapphires. And a crown.

“I’m glad you like it.”

He leaned in. “Are you okay? I
hate
that I wasn’t with you when you came to Nashville. I was worried.”

Her big blue eyes went even bigger and she gave out a short laugh. “I’ve been so concerned for you that I think I forgot to be afraid.” She put an arm around his waist. “Are
you
okay?”

He ran a finger down her jawbone and echoed her words. “I’ve been so concerned for you that I think I forgot to be afraid.”

Maybe that’s what love was.

“Promise you’re okay?”

He nodded. “No smoke, no fire. I’m going to make it. I don’t know what’s next. I still have to figure that out, but I’m okay.”

Ginger hobbled up and put a bottle of water in Jackson’s hand. “Hi, Emory.”

“Hello.”

“Jackson, you need to take a shower. Sammy laid out your clean clothes.”

“Why? I’m going on last. We’ve got time.”

She sighed. “Randall is getting your monitoring equipment ready. You know you’re going to want to make sure they have your guitars set up in the order you want them—even though you’ve already been over it five times. I wish you hadn’t cut your hair.”

“You’ve made that abundantly clear.”

Emory had some little glittery gewgaws stuck in her little-girl curls. Pretty. What he really wanted to do was look at her, so he did for maybe thirty seconds. He smiled, hoping she would give him
that
smile. She did.

“St. Peter, give me strength! Can we please get out of the tenth grade until this is over?” Ginger said.

“I’ll go,” Emory said. “I’ll find my seat and see you later.”

“No. I want you to watch from the wings. Best seat in the house. I promise.”

She looked puzzled. “Okay. Now, where?”

He dropped a kiss on her mouth. “The side of the stage. Warren will take you around there.”

“I don’t want to be in the way.”

“You won’t. The performers are entering from the right and you’ll be on the left. There’ll be some random people with the other acts hanging around where you are but they’ll just be watching.”

“Okay,” she said.

“And I’ll see you around there later,” Ginger said over her shoulder as she hauled him away.

“So,” Randall said as he organized the components of the monitoring system, “are we not good enough to meet your girl?” But he was smiling, in high spirits. Everyone was. It was almost as if everyone had decided to take a break from sorrow tonight.

Jackson laughed. “Sorry, Randall. I saw her in that sparkly getup and forgot y’all were even here. There’ll be plenty of time for that later.”

And it was looking like that might be true.

• • •

“Here’s a chair for you.” Warren unfolded a metal chair from the stack against the wall.

“I’m too nervous to sit,” Emory said, though she wasn’t sure how long she would be able to stand in the shoes that Gwen and Christian had insisted she just had to have. She seldom wore heels at all and never any this high. But Jackson had liked them. Did he really mean what he’d said about the shoes and later? She blushed at the thought but she’d do it. After all, she was a strong, powerful woman who deserved to wear high heels and nothing else for the man she chose to be with—if she wanted. And she did choose him and, more and more, it seemed he had chosen her, too.

For the next two hours, Emory watched some of the brightest stars of country music perform. During this time, other people came and went from the wings, and though she exchanged idle small talk with them, she wasn’t very concerned with them. Truth be told, the musical history transpiring on the legendary stage was wasted on her.

She was mentally holding her breath, waiting for the thing that really mattered. Regardless of what he’d said, she wouldn’t relax until she saw for herself that he was all right, that he was happy with his band, in this venue, doing the thing he was born to do. She wanted that for him more than she wanted him for herself. But maybe it didn’t have to be one way or the other.

After Brad Paisley did an encore and exited the stage to a standing ovation, the emcee—she’d forgotten his name but, according to Jackson, he was some important deejay—stepped up to the microphone. Maybe she should brush up on that kind of thing—especially if there was a chance she could be part of this life.

“We’re all about some Jack Beauford here in Nashville, Tennessee,” the emcee said and the crowd went wild. “But”—he held up a hand—“there’s another Beauford boy in the house tonight, one who plays a little football down in San Antonio, Texas. Ladies and gentlemen, two-time Super Bowl champ and our own University of Tennessee Heisman trophy winner, Gabe Beauford!”

Gabe strolled onto the stage carrying a football with Jamal and Troy behind him, all of them looking handsome in formal attire. Gabe tossed the football to Troy, who ran upstage and yelled, “Go long!” Gabe rushed downstage while Jamal pretended to tackle the very flabbergasted emcee. Troy passed the ball and Gabe caught it.

Then Gabe took a Sharpie from his pocket, all three men signed it, and Troy sent it sailing into the crowd. Emory laughed and clapped along with the audience.

“Forgive me for that,” Gabe said into the microphone. “See, I’m a very insecure person. After witnessing all the tremendous talent on this stage tonight, I couldn’t just come up here and talk. I had to show you that I can do
something
. So I got my pals up here to help me. You might have heard of them—Troy Milam and Jamal Washington of the San Antonio Wranglers.” Troy and Jamal gave little bows and exited the stage.

“I was going to demonstrate my musical ability for you tonight but my brother Jack took away my kazoo.”

More laughter. Then Gabe took a step closer to the microphone and let his face take on a serious expression—and the audience immediately grew quiet.

“My brothers Jackson, Rafe, and Beau join me tonight in thanking you for coming out in support of the Camille Beauford Memorial Concert to benefit the Vanderbilt Medical Center Burn Center. Some of you have been with us from the beginning, since Jackson conceived this idea twelve years ago. Some of you are joining us for the first time tonight.” He placed his hand over his heart. “Believe me when I say we appreciate every one of you in equal measure.

“As you know, fire affected our family when we lost our parents and sister twenty years ago. Again this year, we were affected by fire when we lost friends who were very nearly family. We mourn them tonight.” There was quiet applause.

“Of course, this would not have been possible without the incredible artists who donated their time and talent tonight or the sponsors listed in your program. They have our heartfelt gratitude. It is my pleasure to announce that this year, we have raised a little over 2.2 million dollars.”

Gabe smiled and waited for the applause to die.

“If it was a pleasure to make that announcement, I am humbled to be able to announce the recipient of the Camille Beauford Memorial Foundation Health Care Professional of the Year Award. Martha Evans Caney is a registered nurse who works at the Vanderbilt Burn Center, but she is so much more. Whether they are three or eighty-three years old, she’ll tell you that all her patients are her babies. Not only does she give the very best care to be had anywhere, she’ll stay an extra shift just to hold a hand. She brings a quiet spirit of dignity to her patients that helps them find hope even when there doesn’t seem to be a lot of hope to go around. For the next year, Mrs. Caney will sit as a voting member on the Foundation Board and help decide how this money will be spent.

“And believe me, she has some ideas. I had the pleasure of having lunch with Miss Martha yesterday and I learned she has a lot of opinions about a lot of things, including a few things I could do to increase my speed on the field. And I’m going to listen to her because she’s wise. Also, I’m a sucker for a woman who calls me
baby.
Ladies and gentlemen, Martha Evans Caney.”

A tall black woman with gray hair and a regal bearing walked to the stage on Jackson’s arm. In his faded jeans and tight black t-shirt Jackson was a sharp contrast to tuxedo-clad Gabe but he was so much more appealing. When the crowd got to their feet and lifted the roof with applause, Jackson took a step back and joined in the applause, making clear that this was Martha Evans Caney’s moment.

Gabe handed Martha a crystal plaque and the three of them posed for pictures.

Gabe stepped back to the microphone.

“Tonight when you hit your knees, or commune with the stars, or just spend some peaceful moments with yourself, I hope you’ll spare a good thought for all Miss Martha’s babies, for all the babies in all the burn units everywhere, and for our baby sister Camille. When my brothers and I hit our knees, we’ll remember you.”

As the three of them walked off the stage, Emory wiped her tears away.

“Loves to hear himself talk, doesn’t he?” The cynicism of the words was negated by the emotional tone of the voice.

“Oh. Hi, Dirk. How long have you been there?”

“Ever since Jackson stepped on the stage. And I’ll be here until he’s done. Jimbo’s on the other side and Martin’s with him now.”

“Do you seriously think someone would hurt him?”

“I seriously think someone had better not try.” And he flashed her a rare dimple-deepening smile.

Yes, it was a good night. It had to be, if even Dirk was emotional and smiling.

Now the emcee was back, telling jokes, probably stalling a little.

“What’s that man’s name?” Emory asked Dirk.

“Hell, if I know. I don’t listen to the radio. But he doesn’t have a weapon on him. I know that.”

Figured. “… And I give you Jack Beauford and the Barroom Brawlers!”

And the nameless but very important emcee faded into nothing as all the bright light that was Jackson walked on the stage. The hall erupted into pure pandemonium, with clapping, catcalls, and stomping.

Then he stepped up to the microphone and smiled. “I don’t talk as pretty as my brother—or catch as pretty either. But I sure do appreciate y’all.”

Then he gave a nod and launched into “Spring Break State of Mind.”

Jackson was loose, happy, and full of energy. Emory folded her hands over her mouth and sent up a little prayer of thanks. He’d crossed this hurdle.

He did the thing she loved most—threw his head back, closed his eyes, and went deep into the guitar solo where he summoned a certain kind of magic and gave it back to those who had come to hear something special. Then he backed up a step, opened his eyes, and flashed a smile. He tried to toss his hair out his eyes but he didn’t have enough.

“What a waste.” Ginger had come up to stand beside Dirk.

But Jackson didn’t care. He bit his lower lip around a smile and looked humble at the audience’s reaction. You’d never know that three-quarters of the audience came from the highest society that Nashville had to offer. They were dancing in the aisles and crying out for more.

And Emory felt sorry for every woman in the place who wasn’t her because she was going home with him—maybe for always.

• • •

Just get through it,
Jackson told himself.
Don’t let anyone see.

How could he have been such an idiot? How could he have thought that just because he had been sane during the final rehearsal and sound check on this very stage that he could do this? It had started when he’d stood in the wings and listened to Gabe’s speech but he’d reminded himself that he’d done great in rehearsals, on his porch, in church, and at The Café Down On The Corner.

But that wasn’t the same—far from it. When he’d walked off the stage with Gabe and Martha Caney, he should have kept walking.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
It was too much, too many people who could die.

And Emory was one of them.

How could he have let her come here? How could he have even begun to entertain the thought that he could have what he wanted, that he deserved
anything
? Good thing he’d ordered a bodyguard for her tonight. He couldn’t take care of her. He couldn’t take care of anyone. But he smiled and sang and flirted with the crowd; he danced and played the hell out of every guitar that his techs had so carefully lined up backstage.