Forever Is Over (135 page)

“
That
’
s fine. The sooner the better as far as we
’
re concerned.
”
“
Obviously, if you do have any second thoughts, then please make
sure you cancel the appointment, as soon as possible.
”

Bloody hell! Change the record!

“
Honestly Doctor, that won
’
t be happening! The next nappies that
Jemma and I will be changing, will be our grandchildrens!
”

Throughout the conversation, there was an undercurrent. I had
welcomed Kelly into my home, given her a guided tour of my house
and even promised she could walk down with me to pick Jamie up from
nursery, but I could feel tension in the air. I thought Kelly was trying
her level best to be pleasant, but she seemed to be forgetting how well
I knew her, forced pleasantries were always going to be apparent to
me. After an hour of slogging through our time together with niceties,
apologies and tactful reactions, I tired of playing the game.

“
Kelly, I appreciate you coming here today, it means a lot to me that
you felt the need to put things right, but is this what we are resigned
to now?
”

“
What?
”

“
Bullshit conversations where neither of us really speaks their mind
in case it triggers off World War Three.
”

“
I don
’
t know how to answer that, Jemma.
”

“
Answer it honestly.
”

“
I think this is the best we can hope for. Look at the photos around
your house, Jemma, it
’
s not as though this time you just kissed or even
screwed my boyfriend
…
you MARRIED him! I wish I was one of those
incredibly nice people, the type that doesn
’
t resent being double crossed,
the type that can put their past behind them and move on, but that
’
s not me. I
’
m not that nice.
”

“
Why aren
’
t you? As a child you were the nicest person anyone
could possibly meet, you were placid, calm, cheerful and loving, what
has happened to change that?
”

“
Do you even have to ask, Jemma? Mum died. I killed her. The
only person I ever felt truly loved by betrayed me in the most devious
of ways. We are a product of circumstance, Jemma and circumstances
have changed.
”

“
Your version of events is distorted though, Kelly. Nothing happened between Richie and I when you were together, it all only happened long
after you left.
”

“
That
’
s a lie!
”

“
No, it
’
s not!
”

“
It was all happening between you and Richie whilst I was still
around.
”

“
Kelly, I promise you it wasn
’
t!
”

“
Jemma, it did! Maybe not physically, but emotionally it did.
Before I left, Richie told you that he had cancer, he didn
’
t tell me
…
.
and neither did you.
”

“
That was to protect you!
”

“
To protect me? I didn
’
t want protecting! I just wanted the truth.
When I saw you in the park togeth
er, you could have just said ,

‘
Kelly, it
’
s Richie, he
’
s got cancer
…
..
’
, but you chose not to. You
chose to rank people in order of importance to you and I came off
second best. You hardly knew Richie and you put him before me, your
own sister.
”

“
Kelly, I wish I had told you.
”

“
No, Jemma, don
’
t continue to lie to me. I have been a victim of your lies for too long. You don
’
t wish you
’
d told me at all. If you had
told me that day, that Richie had cancer, we wouldn
’
t be sitting here in
your middle class palace, sipping percolated coffee in fine china mugs,
looking at photos of the offspring you conceived with my boyfriend. Keeping your mouth shut was part of your long-term strategy, don
’
t
insult my intelligence by suggesting anything else.

If you
’
d have told me that Richie had cancer, Richie would never
have been available, I would have helped him through that ordeal and
who knows, you may have been visiting Richie and I, and our children.
”

“
Kelly, how muc
h of a bitch do you think I am?
None of this was
pre-meditated, it just happened. Not like your visit here today, you said
you came here to put things right, but that
’
s not what you planned at
all, is it? You came to finish what you started in hospital.
”

“
Jemma, I came to try to get things to a level where we can be civil
to each other. Having brought me up, I felt I owed you that much, but
let
’
s not kid ourselves, we aren
’
t going to be best mates. That
’
s impossible
now.
”

I thought this through for a few seconds. On this point, there was
no real reason to disagree.

“
Do you know what, Kelly? I agree with you. To an extent I
understand the point you are making and if I put myself in your shoes,
I can understand why you are bitter. I mean if I
’
d have buggered off and
you
’
d been the one who was jailed, then I
’
d come back to discover you
’
d
married my ex, I
’
d feel like you do now, well and truly pissed off!
I promise none of this was done to ge
t at you though, believe me we
just fell in love, but knowing how you feel about Richie, it
’
s probably
best you don
’
t spend too much time around us, it
’
d only complicate
matters.
”

“
Jemma, you
’
re right,. Looking back, I just wished I
’
d been aware
of the whole situation before the crash. I mean when I met him, Richie
wasn
’
t even wearing a wedding ring, so I didn
’
t even know he was
married, let alone who he was married to.
”

“
I agree, Kelly. Richie should have told you.
”

“
Maybe then we wouldn
’
t have made love.
”

“
I beg your pardon!
”

“
I
’
m just saying, if I
’
d have known he was married to you, Jemma, I
wouldn
’
t have let him make love to me on the
‘
Sunny Road
’
.
”

“
Don
’
t even try that one, Kelly! I know nothing happened. I know
you want to get back at me, but is making up lies really the way forward?
Have some respect for yourself!
”

Kelly smiled sardonically.

“
Is that what Richie said, Jemma? That nothing happened! Bless
him! He probably didn
’
t count it as proper sex, I mean it probably
only lasted thirty seconds. He was in and out before I could say,
‘
Dick
Billingham
’
.

I had been a fool. All this was too raw for Kelly to forgive me. I even
half think she had coming looking for me to try to put things right, but
the house and the photos and everything else, just allowed the hatred
to bubble up inside. We needed time apart. Time for her to accept who
I was married to.

“
Get out, Kelly!
”

“
I
’
m sorry, Jemma! Sometimes the truth hurts.
”

“
The truth! This is just a pack of lies!
”

“
He told me his wife didn
’
t let him anywhere near her. He said
she
’
d been up for it all the time before the kids, but now she came out
with every excuse under the sun to get out of having sex. There was no
intimacy left in their relationship. They were just like brother and sister,
is what he said. That was his excuse for coming so quickly. He said he
was totally out of practice. I told him not to worry. I told him together
we
’
d put it right, teach him a bit of endurance. Back in the day, when
he put his mind to it, your husband couldn
’
t half make me come, he
was my first and still the best lover I ever had. That
’
s why I wrote the
letter. No-one else compared. At least I got to feel him inside me for
one last time!
”

I should have kept my cool. I knew she was lying, but
Richie had
obviously been mouthing off to her a
bout me, that was what made me
so mad. Kelly was wanting to get a reaction and that
’
s exactly what she
got. I shouldn
’
t have done it, but I slappe
d her right across the face, a
real tennis backhander it was, the full stroke. Kelly was unfazed. She put
her hand to her face, to feel where I had caught her, but she just smiled
at me again and proceeded with the onslaught.

“
Let
’
s just hope I bleed now, Jemma. I
’
m already a couple of days
late. The Doctors warned I might be late, with the trauma of the crash,
but who knows, it could be down to the pitter patter of tiny feet. How
would that feel, Jemma? Wouldn
’
t it be lovely to have a little brother or sister for Melissa and Jamie, without the agony of childbirth. I mean
you
’
re too posh to push now, aren
’
t you?

It
’
s amazing when you think about it, isn
’
t it? Life created from just
thirty seconds of unbridled passion between YOUR sister and YOUR
husband. It felt better afterwards though, I mean we both really, really
needed it.
”

I was starting to question my faith in Richie, but I was determined
not to let it show.

“
I don
’
t believe you.
”

“
I tell you what then, when he gets in tonight Jemma, tell him who
popped in for coffee. Don
’
t accuse him but just throw in a little line
about me mentioning I might be pregnant and watch his face drop.
When it does, you
’
ll know exactly who the liar is and I can assure you,
it
’
s not me!
”

“
Get out of my house, Kelly!
”