For The Love Of Laurel (20 page)

He put his mouth on her lips, gently forcing them open. He knew she wanted to resist, but he wasn’t going to let it happen. He wanted her to trust him. He deepened the kiss, fully aware of any signs that she wanted to stop. She tried to move her head away, but he was too strong. He continued to kiss her just long enough to let her know she was still in charge, though he could change that at any time. Then he let her go.

She pushed at him. “Get off me.”

“I’m not on you,” he said calmly.

“You promised to stop if I wanted you to.”

“I did. We aren’t even touching.”

“You didn’t stop soon enough.”

“Yes, I did. Listen to yourself. You sound like a vestal virgin, which we both know you aren’t.”

“I should slap you for that.”

“Be my guest.”

“Forget it. Just give me a blanket and go away.”

“No.” He said it ever so quietly.

She raised her eyebrows. “No?”

“No. I want to ask you something. If things were different, would you be attracted to me like I am to you?”

She didn’t answer him.

“Well?”

“Maybe,” she finally conceded. “Oh hell. I hated you at first. Then I came to tolerate you. I think I was attracted to you and didn’t want to admit it because of the thing with Steadman. Besides, I knew Daddy would throw a fit if I became involved with the hired help—which is what I thought you were. There were more negative reasons than positive ones for me to ignore what I felt. That’s probably why I always gave you such a hard time. It was easier to be angry and rebellious than to dwell on something that couldn’t be.”

“But it can be. All you need to do is remember that you have done this before—that you aren’t giving up your virginity. Let’s be in charge together. I promise you I will do my very best to make the experience pleasurable for you. If at any time I fail, let me know.”

“If we’re in charge together, the same goes for you.”

He cupped her chin in his hand. “Believe me, there is nothing you could do that would cause me to ask you to stop.”

He got off the bed. “But I can tell myself to stop, and that’s what I have to do. Right now. As much as I want you, I would always wonder if I’m taking advantage of you. If this ever happens, it can’t be like this. It has to be when you want me too, not when you are, once again, defying your father. Do you understand?”

He was dumbfounded when she just stuck her tongue out at him.

“What?”

“Oh, Dylan, you are such a thoughtful person.” She sat up and leaned against the headboard. “But you don’t know me. I’ve defied my father countless times in countless ways. Sure it was traumatic when Steadman accosted me, but he didn’t rape me. Granted, it put me off men, but deep inside I knew the right man could change that. And try as I might to ignore it, I have always suspected you were that man. My tantrum, as you called it, was against one person—my father. Not Steadman, not you—my father.

“I’m seeing the side of you I always knew you had and would never show. And I’m not about to let this opportunity pass. I think you had me at the airport the first day we met. I fought it hard because I was still getting over Adam’s death and didn’t want to believe another man could interest me so soon. Besides, I knew Daddy would never allow it. But there’s no explaining what’s in one’s heart. So unless you’re lying about wanting me, I suggest you dim the lights some so the atmosphere is more romantic then get your butt back on this bed and show me your moves.”

She held out her hand to him. After dimming the lights, he took her hand and sat back on the bed. They both moved until they lay face-to-face.

“There’s just one thing you should know about me first,” she said softly.

“What’s that?” He felt he could drown in her beautiful eyes.

“I’m a sixth degree black belt in sex. You?”

“I’ll let you be the judge of that.”

Chapter 31

It was now one a.m. Ordinarily, Dylan would have felt there had been enough foreplay, but he wasn’t about to deprive himself of one second with her. He could hardly believe it was really going to happen, and knew it wouldn’t if she hadn’t admitted what she just did.

“Kiss me,” she whispered, putting her hand on the back of his head and pulling him toward her until their lips met.

He did—as gently as his heightened libido would let him. He would let her take the lead, let her set the limits, the pace, all of it. Once he knew the rules, if indeed there were any, he would take over.

“What was that?” she said. “I asked for a kiss from a lover, not from a brother.”

“Just wanted to be sure. But now that you’ve asked for it, you shall have it.”

He brought his mouth down hard on hers. She put her arms around his broad back and stroked it. Her lips opened and his tongue sought hers. He moved his tongue in and out of her mouth, a prelude of what was to come.

Still kissing her, he sat her up, unfastened her bra and pulled it off her. Then, purposely ignoring her breasts, he lay her back down. He could sense she was surprised he hadn’t touched them at the first opportunity, and that was what he wanted.
Keep her guessing.

His mouth never left hers as he took off her panties. It was all he could do not to look, to touch, to ravage her, but he would wait until he made her want him so much, she could never doubt that she was in charge the entire time.

Reluctantly, he broke contact with her, got up, and quickly undressed. He took a condom out of his wallet then turned toward the bed, not bothering to hide his erection.

She looked at him in mock surprise. “You’re a fine specimen, sire.”

“And you, my lady, take my breath away.”

He got back on the bed and propped his head on his hand. “You are still in charge, Laurel, in case you think I’ve forgotten. But, I give you fair warning. The time may come when I will no longer be able to honor that.”

“The time may come when I no longer care. Make love to me, Dylan.”

She sucked in a quick breath when he suddenly covered her breasts with his hands and squeezed them. He slipped one arm under her neck and with his other hand he concentrated on each breast, running his fingers over every inch of them, and rubbing the hardened nipples.

He followed with his mouth, kissing each breast. She pushed against him, wanting more. He obliged. Taking one breast in his mouth, he licked and sucked it and then concentrated on her nipple.

She stroked his head then ran her hands down his arms, squeezing them tight as he gave his attention to her other breast with his mouth, causing her to moan.

He took that as his cue and ran his hand over the other breast. He trailed his fingers down the middle of her body to her navel. He gently massaged her abdomen, his hand continuing to move downward until it was on her thigh. He felt her thigh muscle tense.

“It’s okay,” he whispered. Her muscle relaxed and his hand moved to the inside of her thigh.

He kissed her and put his finger inside her. She gasped and pulled away.

He looked into her eyes, barely able to control himself, knowing she was ready for him.
She’s like a skittish colt
. “Do you want to stop?” he said, his tone low.

“I don’t know . . . no, I was just surprised.”

“That happens sometimes when I show instead of tell. Should I tell you what I’m going to do beforehand?”

“No, I like surprises,” she whispered. “I think.”

“Trust me. Just trust me. Now, during the next part, you’ll have to open your legs.” He gave her a sexy smile.

“I knew that.” She gazed into his eyes.

He put his hand between her legs and they opened. He slipped the condom on and put his leg between her knees. He felt her open even more. He moved until he was on his knees between her legs.

“Last chance,” he managed to say. She just stared at him, her expression inviting.

With a sigh of relief, he pushed himself inside her. Her legs went around his lower back, allowing him to go deeper.

She pulled his head down and licked his lips in time with his thrusts. Never had he experienced anything like it. And with every thrust, she rose to meet him. Her fingernails dug into his back.

He nipped at her tongue, causing her to gasp and move it back into the safety of her mouth, only to have him follow her tongue with his own. It probed every part of her mouth. Below, he could feel her climax building.

He deliberately slowed down, and sensed her disappointment.

“Dylan?” she rasped.

“Shh. Let me be in charge now. Just enjoy.”

She nodded.

He pulled out of her and her legs landed on the bed. Giving her no time to think, he put two fingers inside her and within seconds, brought her to a climax.

“Oh God.” she finally managed to say between waves of pleasure.

“I’m just getting started.”

He kissed her and played with her breasts. When her breathing got heavy and her hips began to move, he put his fingers inside her again, bringing her to the brink, only to back off.

When he was certain she wasn’t going to come the second he entered her, he slid inside her.

Starting slowly, he kissed every part of her he could reach, while gradually making his thrusts harder and faster.

Her legs clenched as her passion increased, and she closed herself around him. It amplified the friction and his pleasure. He felt her begin to climax, and he finally gave in to his own release.

Afterward, they lay beside each other. She turned to look at him and put her hand on his cheek.

“Thank you,” she said.

“It was my pleasure, believe me.”

What happens now? Will he feel he has to leave? Will he fall in love with me? Or am I just a conquest, a notch in the Dylan Kraft sexual belt?

“You’re quiet,” he said.

“Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“It’s not important.”

“Having regrets?”

“No.”

“Good. I hope you won’t. But I can guess what you’re thinking about. Just let me say this. I tried to give you an idea of my feelings, but this happened pretty fast.”

She laughed. “Right. My goodness, we’ve only know each other a few years. We are so impulsive.”

“Imp. You know what I mean. As crass as it sounds, if you were looking for pity wrapped in a fairy tale, it can be that. If you wanted to feel cherished for an hour, it can be that. If you wanted a one-night stand, it can be that. If you want anything more serious, it can definitely be that.”

He cupped her chin and turned her face toward his. “It can mean anything you want it to, for two reasons. First, you are always in charge in matters of this sort. Second, I’m pretty darn certain, against my better judgment, I’m falling in love with you.”

She raised her eyebrows. “You are? Sometimes you have a funny way of showing it.”

“Well, I just showed you, and now I’m telling you.”

She sighed. This complicated things. Thanks to him, she was ready to have a physical relationship, but love?
I’m not ready to go there
.

Ready or not, she thought, it was already too late. The world felt brighter and more beautiful than it had in a long time, if ever. Was she willing to start dating again? Part of her said yes and part of her said only Dylan. But she needed to spread her wings and fly. She wanted to taste what she’d missed out on since Adam before committing to one man. It would be easier if there weren’t so many questions she needed the answers to first.

She took his hand and held it between both of hers. “Love isn’t on my agenda right now. I don’t want that to sound cold and unfeeling because I have suspected for a while now that I care for you more than I want to. But I need to leave it there for the time being. There are still things in my life I have to straighten out before I can contemplate anything else.”

She knew he was suspicious. Would he ask her what things she was talking about? He didn’t.

“For tonight, as selfish as this sounds and I apologize for that, would you mind staying here with me?”

“Of course not. I’d like to spend the night making love to you.”

“It’s very tempting, but I need sleep. I haven’t gotten much lately.” She kissed him then turned her back to him and pulled up the covers. He moved until their bodies were touching and lay spoon-fashion.

“Sleep well,” she murmured as she turned off the bedside lamp.

“You too.”

She found his arm and put it across her body and snuggled up to him.

“You’re killing me, you know,” he whispered in her ear.

She felt his erection. “I can tell. But it’s about time I regained the upper hand.”

“I didn’t realize you’d lost it.” He kissed her shoulder. “But you’re right about needing sleep, so we will sleep—for now.”

Chapter 32

Laurel woke and glanced at the alarm clock. Almost noon. She stretched and yawned, unable to remember when she had ever felt so relaxed. She turned over. Dylan’s side of the bed was empty except for one long-stemmed red rose and a note. She knew he would’ve had to go to the local flower shop to get the rose, as she didn’t grow them. She picked it up and smelled its sweet fragrance, and then retrieved the note with her other hand.

Good morning. Duty calls, but the coffee maker is ready for you to switch on. I won’t say anything about last night (well, this morning actually) because there are no words to describe it. I will simply say you are beautiful. D.

She read it several times, each time seeing a deeper layer of meaning.
He knows not to talk of love again for now, and yet, his words say more than perhaps he realizes. Or am I making too much of them?

She got out of bed and showered, all the time reliving the time she had spent with him just hours before. She had told him love wasn’t on her agenda. He’d taken it well. Too well, maybe. He might not have believed her or he might have been relieved if he regretted what he’d said.

She didn’t allow herself to think about it anymore until she was in the kitchen turning on the coffee maker. Beside it was another note with two housecleaning firms and his
Either of these will be discreet. Just be sure to get a confidentiality agreement from them.

She groaned, remembering the dining room. She couldn’t believe she’d actually done it. She poured coffee, grabbed the note, and sat down at the table in the nook. She called Zephyr House Cleaning and made arrangements to have them come all day tomorrow. That taken care of, she put the dining room out of her mind.

Sipping her coffee, she thought about Dylan. As if she’d conjured him up, she heard a knock at the door. After a few seconds, a key turned in the lock, and the door opened.

“Laurel?”

“In the kitchen.”

Within a few seconds, he came through the door. By the look on his face, she could tell he wasn’t certain what kind of reception he’d get in the cold light of day. She blew him a kiss and saw him relax.

“The coffee’s just made. Help yourself.”

He did. “You slept late?” he said as he leaned against the counter.

“Seems so. Come and sit down. I won’t bite.”

He walked over and pulled out a chair across the table from her.

“I thought you were working,” she said as he sat down.

“Finishing up some Steadman stuff with the FBI.”

She was quiet for a few moments then nodded. “I need to talk about last night.”

“What about it?”

“First, I want to say it was amazing.” She sighed. “But the more I’ve thought about it, the more I realize just how amazing it really was—how amazing you are.”

He frowned. “By your tone of voice, I’m not sure that’s a compliment.”

She got up and brought the coffee pot to the table, topped off their cups, and then set the pot between them.

“It is, believe me. More than you know. The entire time you gave me assurances that I was in charge, controlling the situation, but that’s because you know how to use reverse psychology to your advantage. Does the DEA have a class called, ‘How to control any situation covertly’?”

He rolled his eyes. “Woman, what the hell are you talking about?”

“I was never really in charge, but by letting me think I was, you eventually got what you wanted. You made me believe I was giving you permission, didn’t you?”

He leaned back in the chair and shook his head, then straightened and put his hands palms down on the table. “Is that what you thought at the time, or only in hindsight? I warned you I might take over and I did, but I let you know first. You got what you wanted too.”

“I realize that, but I’m thinking about all the times you said I was in charge, yet it doesn’t seem that way now, so I guess it’s hindsight.”

“If that’s what you really think, I doubt I can say anything to change your mind. I think you are having regrets and rather than admit that, you are lashing out at me.”

She put a hand over one of his. “Or you are protesting too much because I’m right.”

“What difference does it make? If we enjoyed ourselves and each other, the rest of it is nonsense. Unless you are accusing me of talking you into something you didn’t want. When you were hesitant, I backed off, putting the decision squarely on you. You were eager to be an equal partner. Why make it more complicated?”

Laurel thought about that. Finally, she said, “I don’t know. Everything has been complicated since I found out what Gerald did. That seemed a little much, even for him. I was in shock. I don’t regret what happened between us. I just wonder at my own reasons—if I did it just to get back at him.”

“I already told you I didn’t care why it happened—that it could be anything you wanted it to be. I meant that. Don’t let the fact that I mentioned the word love change anything. And yes, it’s possible I could coerce you into having sex. You’re right. I’m trained in the art of leading people to say or do things without them realizing what I’m doing. I hope that isn’t the case here, and if it is, I apologize. But I did my best to be sensitive to your vibes.”

She squeezed his hand. “It isn’t fair to make it seem so clinical. I’m fighting myself, trying to figure out what I want it to be.”

“When you do, let me know. I’ll be around.” He got out of the chair, put his cup in the sink, and left the kitchen.

“Dylan?”

He walked back and stood in the doorway.

“You gave me four choices. I think it started out as pity, but soon changed. I knew it was too good to be that. I don’t do one-night stands—anymore—so it couldn’t be that. The only other choices you gave me were to feel cherished for an hour, or something more serious.” She stood and walked toward him.

When she got within a foot of him, she said, “You made me feel cherished for an hour, and that is something I can’t repay. It was exactly what I needed and you understood that.”

“And the fourth thing?” He caressed her cheek.

“Do I want it to be more? I can’t answer that yet. My life is a mess right now. There are things I need to do and come to terms with before I can think about anything more.”

He kissed her, softly at first, then harder, putting his arms around her and pulling her to him. She kissed him back, and then pulled away.

“I get your message loud and clear,” she whispered.

“Good.” He took her hands and kissed them. “Remember that the next time you want to feel cherished.”

He gave her a cocky grin and left her standing there.

When he isn’t around, I can make up really good reasons for why we had sex without love entering into the equation. He admitted he was falling in love with me, and I was quick to let him know love isn’t part of the deal. Did he believe that? Do I? And I did say I don’t do one-night stands. Wonder what he’ll make of that? And while I’m thinking of it, why’d he come here this morning?

Sighing, she picked up both cups and put them in the dishwasher. She couldn’t wait for the cleaning crew to get there tomorrow. The sooner the dining room was back to normal, the sooner she could put it all behind her. She hoped.

The condition of the dining room set her thinking about Gerald. Something that had never before occurred to her wormed its way into her thoughts and made her feel anxious. She went to her father’s office and took down an atlas. Before she opened it, she rang Dylan.

“Hi.”

“That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you answer with anything but ‘Kraft’.”

He chuckled. “Somehow it doesn’t seem appropriate now—with you.”

She didn’t want to get started on that again. She needed this to be business.

“I want to ask you a couple of questions. First, why did you come over here just now?”

“I’ve been asking myself that for the past ten minutes. I finally figured it out. I was dying to see you in that sexy purple robe.”

“Ah, you like that, do you? So do I. It’s comfy. But I decided to get dressed today. Sorry to disappoint. Second question. Where’s Gerald?”

“I told you. Colombia. I didn’t lie about that, even though I should have.”

“Where in Colombia?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know, or you won’t tell me?”

“I don’t know, but if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. Why do you want to know anyway? You gonna fly down and drop in on him?”

Laurel denied it but not quickly enough. She heard an exasperated sigh.

“Maybe I should ask the FBI to put you in protective custody.”

“You wouldn’t dare. Besides, I have no intention of going anywhere to see Gerald. I’ll wait until he gets home
then
I’ll shoot him.”

“Not if I beat you to it. And I notice you call him Gerald now.”

“Yeah. That’s another thing. I told the cop in Philly that I knew I was Gerald’s daughter, otherwise he’d have shot me too.”

“I remember. It seems like a reasonable assumption, knowing Gerald as I do.”

“I’ve been thinking, and something quite unsettling just hit me a few minutes ago. If he could pay someone to even pretend to rape me, what else is he capable of? What if I’m not his daughter and am really the daughter of both Markhams? What if he had a moment of conscience when he killed them, and just took me?”

“Now that
doesn’t
seem like a reasonable assumption. Forgive me for saying this about Gerald, but he never struck me as altruistic or someone with a conscience. That’s what makes him a good asset. I can well imagine he could shoot a baby without giving it a thought. But it’s a question easily answered.”

“Yep. I’m going to find something that would have his DNA on it and get it tested. And if he’s not my father, there isn’t a chance in hell you’ll be able to shoot him before I do.”