For Love & Bourbon (43 page)

He shook his head. “I told him I’d do my best, but I was only eighteen. My father was still very much in charge. I said I’d be in touch, and that as soon as I was able, I’d help him. He seemed satisfied with that, patted me on the back, and let me go. But when I got home, I had no intention of ever contacting him again. And for two years, I didn’t.”

Ty let out a long breath. “Then one day, out of the blue, Colleen showed up at my college dorm in Louisville. I barely recognized her. She was too thin and the fire had gone out in her eyes. Instead she just looked scared. She told me that she’d cut a deal with the SDU and the Feds to supply them with inside information into Ned’s dealings, and in exchange they’d let her come to the States for protection. But it was only on one condition—that she convince me to help her by going undercover and exposing my cousin’s plans and secrets. I almost didn’t believe her, but then an agent showed up and confirmed everything she’d told me. I was her only hope to not only escape the violence, but to bring down a murderer.

“I wanted to say no,” Ty admitted. “It would’ve been easier to have just brushed her off. It wasn’t my problem and I’d already decided I wanted nothing to do with Ned. But then she told me her reason for leaving him and the cause she’d dedicated so much of her life to. She was pregnant.”

Tears welled in his eyes, and Ava’s heart broke. She reached over to hold his hand in a show of unity and gratitude.

He looked at her with a smile. “She said when she found out she was pregnant, she’d been workin’ on a plan to place a car bomb under the vehicle of a well-known diplomat. She took the test on a hunch, and realized she was correct. It apparently shook some sense into her, and she realized all the violence Ned thrived on was no environment to raise a child in. So she took the plan to the police and offered information in exchange for immunity and escape. They gave her one better. They gave her over to the FBI, and they brought her here and gave her a whole new identity.

“She asked me to be her husband and the father of her baby. I didn’t have the heart to say no. How could I? I still loved her, and now she’d come to
me
. Chosen
me
instead of Ned. So I did as she asked, and after about a year of preparation I was contacting Ned offering him money while the FBI monitored every conversation and every money transfer. Oh, and I suddenly had two babies to raise instead of just one. You can imagine how upside down my life was. And how blessed all at the same time.”

Ava squeezed his hand. “I never once doubted your love for her or for us. You were the best father we could have asked for. We’re the ones who are blessed.”

“I’m grateful to hear you say that. When the Feds came to me and said that, after years of gathering Intel and tracking money to the IRA, they were going to open an investigation and lure Ned to the States to arrest him, I was afraid the life Colleen—Sandra—and I had carefully constructed for you would fall apart. Unfortunately, my fears were correct. After losing her I gave up my will to live. I didn’t care if Ned found out what I’d done, in fact I wanted him to. I wanted to confront him and make him pay for takin’ her away from me. Though, I suppose it was ironic that he also wanted to make
me
pay for takin’ her away from
him
in the first place.”

“She came to you,” Ava corrected. “She did the right thing. You both did.”

“Yes. And I hope I gave her the best life possible, given the circumstances.” He knocked back the last of his whiskey, then rose to his feet. Ava stood and let him pull her into a tight hug.

He kissed her forehead and stepped back, facing the others. “If y’all are satisfied, I’m gonna go to bed. I believe I’ve had enough excitement for one day.”

Ava sat back down as he left, facing her grandfather. “Did you have any idea she was from Ireland?”

Joe shook his head. “Not at all. Our girl was quite the actress. But one thing can’t be denied, dearie.”

“What’s that?”

“She loved ye both so much she gave up everythin’. Let that be a lesson to ye to not waste her sacrifice.”

His words hit Ava hard. All she could think about was Cooper’s face when she had told him she never wanted to see him again.

C
oming home to his apartment was like waking up from a long dream. Everything was exactly as he had left it a month and a half earlier. The stacks of paperwork on his desk, thriller novels and books on American history scattered on end tables and every available shelf space,
Schindler’s List
still inside his DVD player.

Cooper set down his suitcase and stared around the cluttered mess and all he could think about was how much he missed Ava.

He sighed, not wanting to dwell on their parting words anymore. He had done enough of that on the plane ride home. It hadn’t helped that Marco kept asking him about her, as if the simple explanation of, “It wasn’t going to work out anyway,” wasn’t good enough.

He realized now what a mistake it had been to get involved with her in the first place. He had let himself get caught up in all that heat and for the first time in his life, had taken a risk on something despite knowing it would end badly. In a sense, he had guaranteed his own broken heart. There was only one thing to do in a situation like that, he knew. Toughen up, reestablish priorities, and move on.

Walking into his bedroom, his eyes caught the framed photograph resting on his nightstand of him and his father. He had been eleven years old, and his father had just taken him to the Yankees game. They both sported blue ball caps and matching grins.

He lifted the picture, missing his father so damn much it killed him inside. Somehow though, the pain seemed old and worn out compared to the fresher ache in his heart. Ava had lost one of her parents, too. It was a connection they shared, something that had brought them together. Since when did thinking of his father make him automatically think of her?

When his phone began to ring, he set aside the picture frame and saw Horvath’s name on the caller-ID. He rubbed his temple as he answered.

“Yeah.”

“
I take it you made it home safe?
” Horvath asked, the sound of him slurping coffee immediately following his question.

“Got in an hour or so ago. Had to get food and drop Marco off first,” Cooper replied, lowering down onto the side of the bed. “It’s cold as hell up here, Boss.”

Horvath chuckled. “
You did good work in Fox Hills, kid. I’m proud of you.
”

“Thanks.” Cooper looked out the window, seeing the first snowflakes begin to fall. “It was a hell of a ride.”

He didn’t know what made him say it, but repeating Ava’s phrase regarding their relationship only ripped open the wound and made it bleed.

“
Listen, I took the liberty of forwarding your dossier over to the Operations Branch in charge of investigating Al-Qaeda. They like what they see. Nothing’s for sure yet, but there may be a spot for you over there. I know it’s something you’ve wanted for some time now.
”

Cooper blew out a breath, stunned. “Oh, wow. That’s incredible. Thank you, sir.”

“
I’ll be sad to lose you, but you’ve earned it.
”

A million thoughts flooded Cooper’s brain, all of them competing for his attention. At the forefront was the overwhelming feeling of doubt that he couldn’t seem to shake. While he wanted to celebrate finally getting one step closer to his goal, the motivation just wasn’t there. He stared at the image of him and his father once more, anticipating the feelings of purpose and vengeance to pour over him. In its place rose a quieter sense of acceptance, of peace.

Maybe, for the first time, he could finally lay the past to rest.

“
Cooper?
”

He jolted back to reality, realizing his hands were shaking. He swallowed, overwhelmed by his own thoughts. “Yeah, I’m here.”

“
You don’t sound too thrilled. Do you not want the job?
”

“No, no of course I want the job,” Cooper replied, rising to his feet to pace. “It’s just that…”

While he tried to find the right words to say, Horvath began to laugh again. “
I had a feeling this would happen.
”

“What? You thought what would happen?” Cooper demanded, his shoulders tensing up.

“
I forwarded your dossier to one other department. Needless to say, they immediately accepted and were shocked you would even consider it. They were very impressed with your work. It would feel like a demotion, but I think you’d appreciate the change of scenery.
”

“What is it?”

“
You’d be part of the Joint Terrorism Task Force down in Louisville. They’ve got a spot for you right away, if you’re interested.
”

Cooper had to sit down again. “You contacted Louisville about me? Why?”

“
Well, it came to my attention that you were bending the rules a bit down there. Being a nice guy, I didn’t hound you on it, but I did come very close to yanking you off the case. Fraternizing with anyone related to a suspect is a punishable offense. Then again, Ty Brannon was never really a suspect, was he?
”

“No,” Cooper murmured. He closed his eyes, tormented with indecision. How had it happened that he was being presented with his dream job and the job that would let him be with Ava all on the same day?

“
If you want some time to think on it, so be it. I just thought I’d give you the option.
”

“You want me to choose between the job of a lifetime and the woman I love,” Cooper replied bitterly. “I wish you’d only given me one choice and kept the other to yourself.”

“
Why? Life’s too short, kid. Either you make a career or you make a home, it’s tough to have both. Now’s the time to decide which one suits you best.
”

Cooper lowered the phone after Horvath hung up, his head spinning. What did he want, exactly? To spend the rest of his life chasing after a ghost? Or to live in the here and now and take a chance on happiness and love?

Before he could process it all, he heard a knock on his front door. He let out a breath and went to answer it.

His lips parted as he opened the door and saw Ava standing there, dressed in her blue jeans, plaid shirt, and leather boots. She smiled, slow and bright, and he knew in that moment he was being given a second chance.

“Hi, Slick,” she greeted, angling her chin in that sassy way she had. “Can I come in?”

“How—what—sure, sure. Come in.” He backed up to invite her inside, watching as she stared around his apartment curiously. He shut the door and faced her, unsure what to do with his hands. “What are you doing here?”

“Marco gave me your address and since I missed your flight, I hopped on the next one. But I’ll just get straight to the point.” She wandered around his living room, inspecting a few of his books and his towering collection of DVDs. “You have to understand somethin’ about me, honey. I ain’t the kind of girl who begs for things. God has always blessed me with what I need, so I was content.” She turned and met his eyes, one of her brows arched in an arrogant curve. “Then you came along. And at first I kind of liked you, then I hated you, then I liked you again. But then I fell in love with you. And so you can see what kind of position this puts me in when you decide to leave me.”

He shook his head. “I didn’t—”

“Quiet now, Agent Lawson.” She smiled again, though it was sharp around the edges. “You wanted to leave, and my pride wouldn’t allow me to beg for you to stay. Besides, I get it. You had a whole life to get back to.” She motioned around his apartment, amusement in her voice. “Though it’s a bit less glamorous than I expected.”

He shrugged, then crossed his arms. “Where are you going with this?”

She planted her hands on her hips and stared him in the eye, and he could all but see the sparks flying off of her. “The point is, I never beg. But here I am, laying my heart on the line to tell you I love you and I wanna find a way to make this work. If you still don’t want to be with me, then that’s fine. I’ll go. But understand that once I’m gone, it’s for good. I won’t be doin’ this again.”