Fly Me to the Morgue (14 page)

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Authors: Robert J. Randisi

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âAnd fries?'

âAnd fries.'

âI'll be down in a few minutes.'

âI'll be in the Silver Queen bar.'

I hung up, picked up my beer and saw my worst nightmare come through the door: Philip Arnold and his muscle boys.

I had no place to go, so I sat tight as they approached. At least there were a few people in the lounge at that time of the day, and the bartender.

âThought you got away from me, didn't you?' Philip Arnold said, accusingly.

âI hoped.'

âYou must think I'm stupid,' Arnold said. âThink I don't know where you work?'

âMr Arnold,' I said, âI have no idea how smart or dumb you really are. All I can say is, maybe you aren't as dumb as I thought.'

âWatch your mouth,' Arnold said. âYou don't have your big friend here with you, this time.'

No, I thought, but if I could stall long enoughÂ .Â .Â .

âWhat do you want, Mr Arnold?' I asked. âWhat's so important you had to come to my home, and my place of business?'

âMaybe I just wanted to finish what we started.'

âWhat did we start?' I asked. âYou knocked me on my ass. That didn't satisfy you?'

âYou tried to get in my way,' Arnold said. âIf you know what's good for you, you'll convince your Hollywood friend, Bing Crosby, to back off.'

âWhy should he?'

âThat horse is not for sale.'

âThat's not what your sister says.'

âLook,' Arnold said, âI ain't gonna tell you again.'

âYou gonna beat me up in front of all these people?' I asked.

âWe'll do that,' one of his friends said, âand wreck this place at the same time.'

The three of them stared at me with the same vacant eyes. I had the feeling that inside all their heads they were dismembering me.

âIs there a problem here?'

The three men parted so they could see who was speaking behind them. Standing there were Dean Martin and Mack Grey. Dino had an easy going look on his face, while Mack was frowning. Both of them were ex-boxers, and Mack was almost as big as Jerry. Suddenly, my odds had more than evened up.

Arnold and his boys were trying to figure the odds when Jerry walked in and that was it, the odds swung firmly to my side.

âHey, Mr G.,' Jerry said. âThis a party?'

âYou were saying?' I said to Philip Arnold.

All he had left were the same words he'd used out in the Red Rock Canyon.

âThis ain't over.'

As he turned to leave Jerry got right in front of him, chest bumped him.

âIt better be over,' he said to Arnold, â'cause I don't care how many muscle-heads you got with you next time. I'll take you apart.'

Arnold tried to brazen it out and hold Jerry's look, but in the end he averted his eyes, moved around Jerry and skulked off to follow his friends who had gotten out of there quick.

âWhat did we just walk into, Eddie?' Dino asked.

âYou guys just saved somebody from a beatin',' I said, âand I think it was me.'

âNo chance, Mr G.,' Jerry said. âYou woulda held your own til I got here.'

âCome on, guys,' Dean said, âwhat's goin' on?'

âMr G.'s takin' me for the best burger in town,' Jerry said to Dino and Mack. âYou guys wanna come along?'

âI could use a big burger,' Mack said to Dean.

âSure, why not?' Dean said. âI got a limo. Let's do it.'

THIRTY-FIVE

My favorite burger place was way the hell out at a far end of Industrial Drive. I'd been there a lot, and taken many friends and girls there, but this was the first time I ever drove up in a limo with a Hollywood and Vegas legend.

The place was a little clapboard shack â the Burger Shack â that looked like it would blow away in a stiff wind. Getting out of the limo, though, the smell of meat and onions made my mouth water.

âMan, that smells good,' Jerry said.

There were picnic tables set up outside, and one was open. There was a line at the window, so I suggested Dean and Mack grab the table, and Jerry and I would grab the food. I also thought that Dean Martin standing in the line might attract attention. Maybe sitting at the table he'd be able to keep a low profile.

Jerry and I got on the back of the line. Our plan was to carry as many burgers and fries back to the table as we could.

When we got to the window and Jerry saw that they also had hot dogs he got himself two burgers and two hot dogs. And an order of fries. I got one burger and an order of fries for each of the rest of us, and piled some condiments on the tray. We managed to carry it all back to the table, and then Jerry went back for four beers.

âThanks, pally,' Dean said, accepting a beer from Jerry.

Mack nodded as he took his, his mouth already full of fries.

We dressed our burgers and bit into them. They were so juicy that grease rolled down our hands.

âWow,' Jerry said, âthis is a good burger.'

âI'll say,' Mack agreed.

âSo tell me, Eddie,' Dino said. âWhat was goin' on in the bar?'

âThat guy is related to the dead man who was gonna sell Bing the horse,' I said. âAnd there's a sister. She's taken over the sale, but this brother doesn't want it to go through.'

âWhy was he gonna take it out on you?' Dean asked. âAnd why'd he bring help?'

I told him what had happened out at the ranch.

âWell,' Dean said, âthey're lucky they backed off. The four of us would've cleaned the place up with 'em.'

âYou got that right,' Mack said around a mouthful of burger.

While we were talking, Jerry finished both hotdogs and one of his burgers.

âHow were the hot dogs?' Mack asked.

âOK, but not as good as Nathan's in Brooklyn.'

âYou know, I spent a lotta time in Chicago,' Mack said, âand those Chicago hot dogs are pretty good. I can't see how them skinny Nathan's dogs can be better.'

âAre you crazy?' Jerry asked. âThere ain't nothin' better than a Nathan's hot dog. Hell, even those dogs at Nedicks in the city are better than Chicago. I mean, you gotta put all that extra stuff on them to make them taste better, right?'

âAll that stuff joins with the hot dog,' Mack explained, âwhich is nice and plump.'

Jerry and Mack went off then, each extolling the virtues of Chicago and Brooklyn hot dogs. I thought I should probably stop them before they moved on to a pizza argument.

âWhen does Frank get to town?' I asked.

Both Jerry and Mack stopped and looked at me.

âTomorrow,' Dean said.

âAnd that's Frankie's last night at the Flamingo?'

âYep.'

I counted in my head.

âThat makes five nights. The Flamingo booked a new singer for five nights?'

Dean stared at me.

âNever mind,' I said. âThat was silly.' A new singer named Sinatra, I told myself.

âHey,' Dean said, âI'm gonna go and get a burger for the driver. I forgot all about him.'

âI'll get it, boss,' Mack said. âSomebody might spot you in line and cause a fuss.'

As Mack walked towards the shack, Dean called out, âBring him a beer, too.'

After we all finished our burgers â including the driver â we piled into the limo and headed back to the Sands. The inside of the car smelled like meat and onions. Not so bad. Jerry and Mack continued their hot dog debate, and then
did
move on to pizza.

THIRTY-SIX

The next morning the hotel was gearing up because Frank Sinatra was coming in. The steam room in the basement had to be ready. It pretty much belonged to Frank, and while any of the group â Dean, Sammy, Peter or Joey â was free to use it, nobody ever did unless Frank was there.

When I drove in from home I could see the hustle and bustle Frank's imminent arrival always caused.

I had gone home the night before, despite the fact Philip Arnold could have shown up with his two boyfriends at any time. Jerry offered to go home with me and sleep on the couch â âlike the old days' â but I refused.

âI don't think he's that dangerous,' I said.

âWell, if he does bother you,' Jerry said, âremember, don't fight fair.'

I didn't have to worry about fighting fair or foul, since he never showed up.

As I crossed the lobby somebody called my name from the front desk. I headed over there. It was Charlie Slater, one of the concierges.

âGlad I spotted you,' he said. âSomebody came in lookin' for ya this morning.'

âWho?'

âCops.'

âWhere are they now?'

âMr Entratter's office. He told me to watch out for you.'

âTo tell me to go up and see him, or to warn me off?' I asked.

Charlie shrugged.

âYou know who they were?'

âA couple of detectives,' Charlie said. âI got no names, though.'

âWere they lookin' for anybody else?'

âMr Entratter said they wanted to talk to Jerry, and to Mr Crosby.'

âAnd are either one of them up there?'

âI think Mr Crosby.'

âHave you seen Jerry?'

âHe's that big guy that's friends with you, right?' Charlie asked.

âThat's right.'

âI ain't seen him this mornin'.'

âOK, Charlie, thanks.'

I went to the house phone and dialed Jerry's suite. No answer. Next I dialed Jack's number. He answered.

âAre we in trouble?'

âNo,' Entratter said, âI said I didn't want to be disturbed. I've got Bing Crosby with me.'

âI get it,' I said. âIs one of the detectives in your office; Hargrove?'

âThat's right.'

âWhat the hell does he want? We haven't done anything.'

âI don't have all the answers.'

âAll right, Jack,' I said, âI might as well just come up.'

âAnd your friend?'

âI don't know where Jerry is,' I said. âSo for now, I'll come up alone.'

âOK, you do that.'

We hung up. I walked to the elevator and took one up to the second floor. Jack's girl just waved me in without saying a word.

THIRTY-SEVEN

âWell, look who's here,' Hargrove said. He was seated so he could see the door as I entered.

âHello, Detective,' I said.

Bing Crosby turned in his chair and said, âGood morning, Eddie.'

âBing.' I looked at Jack. âIs this why you were lookin' for me, Jack?'

âCome on in, Eddie,' Jack said. âThe detectives have some questions.'

I looked at the other detective in the room, and was surprised. I expected one of the other Las Vegas dicks, but instead it was one of the Sheriff's Department men. I didn't recall his name.

âYou remember Detective Lewis, don't you, Eddie?' Hargrove asked. âFrom the Sheriff's Department?'

âSure,' I said. âNice to see you, Detective. Or is it?'

âI don't know, sir,' Lewis said. âI guess we'll have to wait and see.'

âSit down, Eddie,' Hargrove said. âWe were just asking Mr Crosby some questions about the other day in Red Rock Canyon.'

âWhat more do you think he knows?' I asked, while I remained standing.

âWell, that's why we ask questions,' Hargrove said.

âWell, maybe I can help clear up whatever's bothering you fellas,' I said.

âOh, don't worry, Eddie,' Hargrove said. âYou'll get your turn.'

âMr Crosby?' Detective Lewis said. âYou mind answerin' my last question?'

âAnd what was that question, Detective?' Bing asked.

âHow long were you and Mr Epstein apart before he came back and told you he had found the victim?'

âHold on,' I said. âThis is about Jerry?' I looked at Hargrove. âYou're tryin' to pin this on Jerry?'

âWe didn't know about Mr Epstein's record when we spoke to you at the scene the other day,' Lewis said. âDetective Hargrove was kind enough to fill us in on both of you.'

âSo why aren't you trying to pin it on me, then?' I asked.

âYou and Mr Crosby were together,' Lewis said. âOr you say you were. That puts Epstein alone with the victim.'

âYeah, the dead victim.'

âSo he says,' Hargrove said. âAnd we all know Jerry the Torpedo never lies.'

âWhatever you think of him, he's not lying now,' I said.

âThat's what you say,' Hargrove said. âI think Mr Crosby should answer the question.'

âIt was only a few minutes,' Bing said. âHardly enough time to beat a man to death.'

âThat's not for you to decide, Mr Crosby,' Lewis said. âI've seen Epstein. He's certainly big enough to beat a man to death, especially if he's using a weapon.'

âWhat weapon?' I asked.

âWe haven't determined that, yet.'

âJerry couldn't have beaten that man to death and avoided being splattered with blood.' I looked at Lewis. âDid you see any blood on him?'

Lewis looked over at Hargrove.

âWe still need to talk to Epstein,' Hargrove said.

âI don't know where he is.'

âNot likely,' Hargrove said. âYou always know where he is. When he's in town you two are joined at the hip.'

âSorry,' I said. âCan't help you. I called his suite and he wasn't there.'