Flawed (27 page)

Finally, Xaver spoke. “After Ellyssa is brought back into the fold, would you have the same birthday for
our
creations? Our perfect soldiers?”

“No. Dates mean nothing. A tradition which has no effect on the beings we will create. We do not feel emotions to assign importance to dates.”

“Yet, I can still see you.”

“I do not know to what you are referring.”

“Your eyes, they sparkle when you are pleased.” His grin grew.

Aalexis didn’t respond. All words escaped from her thought process.

Xaver started toward her again, and Aalexis’ chest squeezed. If she didn’t know better, she’d say she felt fear. But that was impossible. She was not afraid of her brother. There was no reason to be. Xaver’s whole world centered around ensuring her safety. Even with the shortcomings she’d been experiencing, fear was unfeasible. A complete waste. Yet, as he approached her, her heart felt like it was going to depart from the cavity surrounded by her ribcage, and her stomach felt a little uncomfortable.

Moments like this, Aalexis wished she had Ellyssa’s capability. That way, she’d always know what was coming. Her sister’s gift would benefit the future superior beings greatly.

Xaver stood in front of her, and she stared at his chest. The coveralls and lab coat hid muscles he wouldn’t have possessed if he had been born from inferior beings. Their physiques were much more mature and had accelerated since they’d reached puberty.

His scent was overwhelming, the heat radiating off his body. The table pressed against her back. Aalexis felt trapped. Anger stirred within her.

She tipped her head up and met Xaver’s eyes with hers. “What is your point, Xaver?”

“We feel,” he simply stated.

“We do not,” she denied. “I do not.”

“Although you try to hide it, I can see it in your eyes.” He reached up and cupped her cheek. “The change in you.”

At his touch, the stirring anger abated, as easily as water dousing a fire. A fluttering sensation burst in her midsection. Before Aalexis knew what was happening, she found herself leaning into his hand, but only for a moment. Her breath seized at the realization of what was happening, and fury burned away the flutter. She pushed him away, hard. A normal man would’ve been thrown back. Xaver wasn’t normal; he stumbled back a couple of steps and his smile fell away.

“Do not touch me. Ever,” Aalexis seethed.

He moved forward.

“I mean it, Xaver.”

He stopped. “Or what? Will you send your pain through me?”

The thought had crossed Aalexis’ mind, to protect herself, the innate carnal side of their beings. Unfortunately, her ability would be rendered as useless against Xaver as it had been against Ellyssa. His shield would protect him.

“Please.” She could hear the plea in her own voice as the anger sucked away, like a black hole and caught the one feeling she was comfortable with. She felt weak, out of control. She felt herself caving.

“It will be fine,” Xaver comforted as if he could sense her distress. “We need to discuss this…change. Or it might consume us like it did Ellyssa.”

No,” Aalexis said. “Emotions weaken.”

Another telltale emotion surfaced on Xaver’s face. An inquisitive one. His left eyebrow rose. For a moment, he looked like
der Vater
. “Do they?” He moved forward, his hand extending toward her, where he hesitated. “May I?” he asked.

While looking at Xaver’s hand, Aalexis’ twitched, as if her fingers longed to entwine within his. She balled her hand into a tight fist and shook her head.

“Very well.” He looked disappointed. “Will you agree to listen to me, at least? To talk? How can we proceed if we do not look at this situation from a logical perspective? You can deny it all you want, but I do see.” His gaze leveled at her. “And I know you feel.”

She didn’t want to talk. She wanted it all to go away. Instead, she agreed with a curt nod.

The slight grin crossed Xaver’s face, again. His eyes seemed to dance. As much as Aalexis didn’t want to admit it, he was truly beautiful. Then again, they were all beautiful; they were perfection.

Maybe Xaver was right. If there was a flaw within her father’s programming, the intelligent thing would be to embrace it and use to their advantage instead of fleeing.

Ellyssa had fled. Ellyssa had been wrong.

With an elaborate gesture for her to go first, Xaver stepped to the side. Keeping a stoic face, Aalexis went over to a metal table with a pristine shiny surface. Her face reflected back at her. Then, she could see what Xaver meant. There was something in her eyes. A spark? Small, undetectable to the a normal human’s eye, but there nonetheless.

She perched on the stool and turned toward Xaver. Unable to look at him, her eyes remained trained on the incubator, a part of their future, comforting.

Pulling a stool over, the metal legs scraping against the white tile, Xaver took a seat across from her. He launched into the story as if unable to contain the words he so long had wanted to tell. “Before Micah died, he came to me. He told me of what he saw when he touched the music box. The box had belonged to the Renegade who had feelings for Ellyssa, and Ellyssa had touched the box.” He paused for a moment. “But instead of just seeing past events, Micah felt emotions. He tried to explain the onslaught he felt, a rush of emotions, a fluttering sensation in his heart, in his stomach. He said he felt the love Ellyssa held for the subhuman. Overpowering and very strong. The rush of emotion had changed something vital in Micah, like it opened a door that had been sealed shut.”

Aalexis’ gaze jerked toward Xaver, her lids narrowing. “You had an opportunity to tell
der Vater
. If he had known, he might have been able to develop another program for us. Something to right the flaw. Why did you hide this?” she demanded.

“Micah had asked me not to tell
der Vater
. He was…afraid, I think.”

“You should have told him anyway,” Aalexis reiterated.

“If
der Vater
had known, he might have had Micah eliminated.”

“As well he should have.”

“What if it was you? Would you go so willingly?”

“Yes.” The lie left Aalexis’ lips freely. The truth was something she didn’t want to admit. Her father had instilled self-preservation well, at all costs. Had that been the reason Ellyssa had left? She quickly dismissed the idea.

Xaver watched her for a moment before he started again. “Honestly, I do not know why I did not inform
der Vater
. He was consumed with Ellyssa.” He shrugged, Aalexis noted his ease of using body expressions as if he’d been practicing. “The more I thought about the conversation, the more curious I became. I began to examine other humans, the ones with whom we were allowed to come in contact,
der Vater
and his assistants. Yes, they are inferior to us in all ways, but maybe emotions have their use.”

Xaver’s face took on a faraway look as he considered the possibilities. All Aalexis wanted to do was block out everything, including those same possibilities.

After a moment, he came back. “Then Ellyssa came. She came for that…despicable human.” Anger tinged his voice and, and for a moment, he sounded like the Xaver Aalexis knew. “Throwing out self-preservation as if the Renegade’s life was worth more than hers. That was stupid of her.”

“Exactly,” Aalexis agreed.

“No. Putting the Renegade’s life before hers was stupid, but the emotional bond she had formed with the Renegade was strong.”

Aalexis hated the words her brother spoke, the possible truth in them. She’d agreed to listen, but she didn’t agree to accept. Aalexis started to shake her head. She was done, but Xaver would not shut up.

“Undeniably strong. It strengthened her.”

“No. No. No.”

Xaver leaned toward Aalexis and placed his hand under her chin, forcing her to look at him. “Listen. It
did
make her strong. The connections she had formed with the substandard humans made them come together. Two are better than one. Do you not see, Aalexis? Because of their beliefs, because of their bonds, they came into an armed building and defeated us.
Us
,” he repeated, as if he still could not believe the outcome.

“That detective helped them.”

“Propelled by what?”

She tried to look away, but he held her chin firm.

“Propelled by what?” he asked again.

“Emotions.” The word rushed out of her like a breath of tainted air.

“Exactly. The emotion she felt, jealousy I believe, made her unpredictable. We did not see the betrayal in her.”

Slowly, Xaver moved his hand to her cheek. This time, Aalexis did not fight it. His touch had a calming effect; there was no denying that.

“I will have to consider what you have told me.”

“I have something else to say,” he said, his thumb tracing the contours of her cheek.

Tingles left in the wake of his touch, his breath washed over her like a soft breeze, his scent filling her nose. Incontestably, Aalexis’ heart responded. “What?”

“I love you.”

Although Aalexis had been attempting to conceal the turmoil raging inside her, there was no hiding what happened next. Her mouth opened with an audible pop.

An eternity seemed to unfold before Aalexis had the sense to close her mouth. When she did, her teeth clicked together.

She didn’t know what to say. Her mental processors had jammed. Not in a million years would she have ever thought those words would flow past Xaver’s lips with such ease.

Several minutes later, she uttered, “We cannot love.”

The words seemed not to have an effect on him. “Ellyssa loves.”

“She is broken.”

“I thought we already established how bonding with others strengthens.”

What in the hell did he want from her? Aalexis didn’t know how to love. She didn’t want to know how. “Maybe it does, maybe it does not,” she stated, irritated. “I would not even know what love would feel like.”

The corner of Xaver’s mouth tilted into a smirk. “Do you hate me?”

Aalexis blinked. Hate was something she did know. The taste of detestation flooded her mouth whenever she thought about Ellyssa, or anyone else for that matter. Everyone…except for her father and, with the exception of her sister, her siblings. But because she didn’t hate them, did that equate love? “I have never thought about it,” she whispered. “I do not know.”

“I have.”

“Clearly.” She paused, looking at the incubator again. “How do you know you love me?”

“When you are near, I feel it here,” Xaver said, placing his palm against his chest. “Even when I think about you, my heart…it flutters. When you touch me, my whole body buzzes.”

Aalexis’ pulse increased as he described what happened to him, the same physiological effects she had felt. Maybe she did love him.

“When we are apart, I cannot stop wondering if you are hurt. I cannot wait to return to you.”

Maybe everything would be jeopardized. Too much.

She covered her ears. “Just stop it,” Aalexis said, shaking her head. “I do not want to hear any more.” Her mind whirled as she tried to grasp on to anything with which to refute his argument. Then she found it so easy, she felt a little stupid for not thinking of it earlier. She blamed her moment of obtuseness on the inexperience of dealing with the sensations. Like a lifesaver, Aalexis seized hold of her salvation at the same time he gave her another excuse.

Xaver reached up and pulled down one of her hands and didn’t let it go. “I would protect you no matter the cost.”

Dropping her other hand, her eyes flicked to him. Her pulse quieted. Her face became smooth, slate-like, as she slipped into her emotionless skin. Comfortable. “Even if it meant your life?”

He nodded.

“Then that is where we differ, brother. I would not sacrifice my life for yours.” Xaver flinched as if Aalexis had slapped him, and she reclaimed control. For good measure, she tossed in her other reason, logically blocking him further. If their discussion had been a game of chess, she would have won. “Besides, it is wrong.”

“Wrong? Why is it wrong?”

She slipped off the stool and started toward the decontamination port. “A millennium of taboo. You are my brother,” she said without looking at him.

“All we have is each other.” His feet hit the ground followed by the muffled padding of covered shoes as he moved closer. “Besides,
sister
, you know as well as I do, we might share a common strand of DNA from
der Vater
, but we are far from being genetically brother and sister. Our DNA comes from several sources, sliced and spliced together. We are more like distant cousins.”

Aalexis stopped, her shoulder blades pulling together.

“I know you feel for me. I can see. If you continue to try and fight something that is overwhelming a part of you, you might break like Ellyssa did. Maybe like Micah was about to. I told you something changed in him.”

Xaver edged closer, and Aalexis could feel his presence behind her.

“With the acknowledgement of this inevitability, we could become stronger.”

She was tired of discussing, tired of listening, and she was going to put an end to the nonsense, whether Xaver was right or wrong. She wanted no more of the madness. Fists clenched, Aalexis spun around.