First Love (9 page)

Jordan began to fidget. “Yes. What does that have to do with our studying?”

“I can’t believe this.” Drew didn’t know whether she was angrier with herself or with Jordan. “If I had known in the beginning, I would never have accepted this job.”

“And why not? What does my father have to do with you tutoring?” Jordan had her hands on her hips. “Who my parents are has nothing to do with me and you.”

“Yes, it does.” Drew’s voice was raised. “There’s no way I could take Hatchet’s money.”

“Excuse me? What did you call my father?”

Drew stood in front of Jordan. “Your father came to Wyoming and tried to do a hatchet job on my father’s political career. There is no way my family would allow me to accept his money.”

Jordan looked surprised. “I can’t believe you would refuse to tutor me because of my father. I thought this was between you and me.” Her hands were in constant motion. First, she tugged on her blouse, then she played with the buttons. She stopped and stared at Drew. “I thought we had an agreement.”

Now it was Drew’s turn to fidget.

“I really need your help this term if I’m to get into the engineering program next semester. Besides, I thought we were friends.” The tremor in Jordan’s voice was obvious. “Please.”

Drew turned away. She didn’t want to see the hurt in Jordan’s eyes. “I need to think about it. Give me until tomorrow.”

“Thank you.” Jordan’s voice was tentative. Drew felt like a shit.
There is no way to win this one.

*

“Girlfriend, are you crazy? The Jordan Thompson. How did you not know?”

Drew tilted her head and looked at Mark. “Why should I know? I hate politics. I saw what happened to my dad when Hatchet interfered with his campaign. All I heard was the dirty tricks and lies Hatchet was responsible for. I decided then I didn’t want anything to do with politics and politicians. I can barely stand to vote.”

“I’m sorry. Jordan doesn’t seem like a bad person.”

“No, most of the time she’s not.” Drew replayed evenings with Jordan. Her dogged determination. Her infuriating and persistent attempts to become friends. Her expression when she understood something. Drew smiled at the memories. “She’s a good person.”

“She gave me this when she left.” Mark handed the envelope to her.

She opened it and pulled out a note and a check. “Hell, it’s a thousand dollars. Why did she go and do something like that?” She then read the note out loud.

“You could keep it as compensation for your medical bills incurred in the past and in the future.”

Drew smacked Mark on the arm. “You’re going to need some medical help—mental.” She looked at the money. “God, this is hard. My parents would be furious. You should have heard the discussion around the table Christmas day.” She readily acknowledged how much every dollar meant to her existence and future. The idea of accepting money from Hatchet burned deep.

“Not very nice?”

“Nice? They can’t even stand to say his name. That’s why he became ‘Hatchet,’ and it has stuck.”

“Drew, she respects you. I also think she really cares about you. I don’t know if you noticed, but she was nearly in tears when you mentioned not tutoring her.” Mark paused and stared at the letter in Drew’s hand. “Her note. She cares.”

Drew leaned her head against the wall. “No wonder I hate politics. I almost feel as if I’m prostituting myself. This is a real dilemma. My parents will be furious if I take it. Jordan may be hurt if I don’t. Ugh!”

“Drew, the president’s daughter. How did you not know?”

“Mark!”

“I don’t care for the man, and I knew she was here.”

“Drop it. I came here because my brother Greg is in Atlanta, UF has such a great medical school, and my mentor has a son teaching here. Nothing political.”

“What’s upset you about this?”

Drew sighed. “I guess I feel deceived.” She stopped and argued with herself before continuing. “Shit, Jordan’s right. There was no reason for her to tell me. This is a business transaction.” She finally acknowledged the hard part. “There’s no way in hell my family would understand.”

“Maybe if you explained how it happened.”

“Oh, sure. Dear Dad. Remember the Thompson family? Yes, the one you wouldn’t piss on if he were on fire. Well, Hatchet is paying for my college. Well, actually it’s a young Hatchet who’s paying, and gee whiz, I didn’t notice.”

“Guess not.” Mark pulled the letter from Jordan’s hand and noticed something written on the back. “There’s more,” he said.

Drew reached for the letter. “Thank you for having faith in me and not giving up. Because of you, I am finally beginning to believe in myself. Hope you had a great holiday. See you soon.”

“Well, at least you didn’t end up with stitches.”

The groan slipped out before Drew could stop it. She laughed. “I don’t want to lie to my family!”

“I’m not suggesting you start. You just don’t have to tell them.”

“The sin of omission,” Drew said. “Is it that different from the sin of commission?”

“OMG! I’m not up for this theological discussion.”

Drew wanted to like Jordan, but the intensity of her family’s animosity was overwhelming. “I just need to remind myself the good I’ll be able to do for so many people when I get back to Wyoming and remind myself that Hatchet is paying for an out lesbian to do all this good work. Actually, I kind of like that image.”

“Well, that’s one way to look at it.” Mark laughed and grabbed his jacket. “Come on. You have some money. You’re taking me out to eat tonight and some place expensive.”

*

Jordan paced the entire length of her bedroom. She needed to shower and change for the party at her sorority house. The skirmish with Drew had been more than just disconcerting. It was depressing. She didn’t understand Drew or her reluctance. Even more, she stressed over what she would do if Drew refused to tutor. Loss of Drew left her feeling empty and she couldn’t explain it.

She continued to dress. Nothing she tried on pleased her. No one at her sorority house lightened her mood. As soon as dinner was over, she went home. All she could think about was Drew.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do.” There was no one she could talk to. Early the next morning, the phone rang, waking Jordan from a sound sleep. “Hello,” she said, her voice still coated with sleep.

*

With any other female, Drew would have described the voice as sexy. “I’m sorry. I thought you would be awake. I can call later.” Her reaction to Jordan’s voice was unsettling. She reminded herself that Jordan was straight.

“Drew! Sorry, I didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“Look, if you still want me to tutor, I will.” This is just a job, she thought. “We’ll just agree to disagree on some things. Is that acceptable?” Drew had waited until seven o’clock to call, realizing not everyone was awake as early as she.

Silence filled the line. Drew wondered if Jordan had changed her mind. Or fallen back to sleep.

Jordan took a deep breath and slowly let it out. It felt like she was sighing in Drew’s ear. Drew shivered. Finally, Jordan answered, her voice barely audible. “Thank you. Yes. Can we start on Tuesday?”

“That works for now.” Drew felt like life had become too complicated even for her. Jordan, as a person, had a good heart. Her father, and his politics, was another matter. “I’ll see you Tuesday.”

“Drew, thank you. I promise you won’t regret it.” Jordan sounded pleased.

Drew was already wondering if she had made a mistake.
How the hell am I going to keep Jordan, her family, and my family in separate mental cubbies? Don’t want to go there!

Tutoring resumed with an uneasy truce. They started promptly and focused only on coursework. A month passed before Jordan broached the topic of politics. “Have you been involved in political campaigns?”

Drew wasn’t sure how to answer. A part of her wanted to remain distant and professional. Her heart reminded her that it had to be hard to be Hatchet’s daughter.
No need to be rude
.

“No. My dad was in the Wyoming legislature, but it didn’t require a lot of campaigning. My mom and my older brother were the only ones who got involved. How about you?”

“I really can’t remember a time when my father wasn’t in politics. He ran for elected office for the first time when I was four. I was in junior high when we moved to the governor’s mansion. Then I’m suddenly living in the White House. “

“Have you ever lived in a regular house?” Drew tried to imagine what Jordan’s life must be like.
What a difficult and public life it must be.

“Probably, but I can’t remember. My grandparents had a farmhouse that I used to visit before they died. We still own it and occasionally visit it. It used to be the only place we could go safely and not be disturbed.”

Drew nodded. In that brief conversation, she had a glimpse into the kind of life Jordan led and realized it had to be a lonely one. She resumed studying. These personal glimpses, however, were poking holes in Drew’s reserve. She was beginning to see a very human and sensitive person. It was making it harder to remain impersonal with Jordan. She cared too much about her.

*

February

For Valentine’s Day, Jordan invited Drew and Mark to a small party at her house. When Drew mentioned the invitation, Mark was delighted, but Drew said they weren’t going.

“Why not?”

“Because she’s Hatchet’s daughter. And it’s Valentine’s Day.”

“So? Neither one of us has anything else to do.”

“No.” Valentine’s Day was just too personal.

“Come on, this is the closest this queen will get to the presidency.”

“You may be royalty, but I assure you the President, the First Lady, the First Daughter, and any other First Thompsons probably have a different view of what makes for acceptable royalty and family, and you and I are not included.”

Mark offered to beg.

“Why would you want to go?”

“Because I like Jordan. I don’t know her that well, but what I do know I like. Besides, she told me she really wants us to be there.”

“When did she tell you that? She didn’t tell me that.”

“She called this morning to make sure we were both coming.”

Drew shook her head. “You’re a pain, but if you want to go, go.”

“I think she just wanted to be sure that you would be there.”

“I don’t think it makes a bit of difference to her if I’m there.”

“You’re wrong. Big time wrong. She likes you. That’s why she called this morning.”

Drew shrugged. She wasn’t sure what else to say.

“Do you…How do you feel about working with Jordan, then?” Mark asked. “I mean, aren’t you concerned about what will happen when she finds out about you?”

“Which? That I’m gay or that my father hates hers?”

“Either. Both.”

“First, I’m her tutor. This is a business arrangement, remember?”
Mostly,
she amended. “Second, I have no intention of telling her I’m gay. Third, I doubt I’ll see much of her after next year. She’ll probably get someone else, anyway. Fourth, she’s not that bad if she’s not trying to kill me.”

“Are you always this analytical?”

Drew raised her hand as if she was going to count off an answer. “First….” Her smile gave her away.

“You’re teasing again.”

“I’m serious about not going to the party. I need to study.”

“Study what? You could probably quote any textbook or any faculty word for word.”

“When I’m focused on work, I don’t make time for parties.”

“Then it’s decided. We’re going.”

Drew groaned. “You’re impossible. Okay, we’ll go, but only for an hour.”

*

She was uncomfortable as soon as she arrived. The number of people at the party was not huge, but still there were at least two to three dozen present. The guys all had short, well-groomed hair and looked like they were poured from a collective mold. The females had long hair, mostly blond, and wore expensive designer clothes and jewelry. Her jeans and Western cut shirt were clean but not new and not expensive. “I’ve walked into an alternate reality.”

“God, they’re clones,” said Mark.

“My friend, look in the mirror. You could almost pass for a Republican. Notice I said almost.” She grinned at Mark’s feigned look of horror. Any response was halted by Jordan’s approach.

*

“Drew, Mark, I’m glad you decided to come.” Jordan hugged them both. “Let me introduce you.” She had nervously waited to see if they would show up. She happily grabbed each one by the arm and led them around making introductions. She hoped Drew,
and Mark,
she reminded herself, would enjoy themselves.

Before she had a chance to ask about their day, Jordan was interrupted by Brandan Carter. He inserted himself next to her.

“Hello, I’m Brandan Carter, Jordan’s boyfriend. Welcome to our party. You know today is Jordan’s birthday. I wanted to privately celebrate.” He moved his left arm around her waist in a possessive manner. “She thought it would be fun to invite our friends over.” Brandan extended his right hand to Mark. “So you’re both medical students. Welcome.”

Jordan was incredulous. She tried to slowly pull away but felt Brandan tighten his grip. Years of education in politeness prevented her from contradicting him in public. Instead, she slowly slipped out of his grasp. She wished she could just as easily slip out of his life.

*

Drew’s eyebrows shot up. She started to speak, but Mark interrupted.

“It’s nice to meet you. I hope you don’t mind, but could you point us to the food? We’ve been at the hospital most of the day and are starved.”

Jordan saw her chance and pulled away. “Let me show you where the food is,” Jordan eagerly offered. She led them into the dining room. “I assure you we have lots to eat and drink.”