First a Dream (Dreams Come True #1) (18 page)

“No you don’t,” Mr. Charmant snapped, alarmed at his son’s behavior. “You’re better off without her. Here.” He stood and passed Gabriel the bottle of wine he had brought with him. “I guess you are really going to need this now.” Then he dropped the magazine on the coffee table and let himself out of the apartment.

***

Isabella

The kids were asleep by the time Isabella reached her barn. She parked and stared at it a moment. The cold, dark look of the place made her shiver. She carried first one child and then the other up the flight of stairs to their bedrooms.

When they were tucked in, she stood in her living room and looked around helplessly. For the first time in a long time she had no idea what to do with herself, no sense of purpose. She looked on the calendar, hoping to see some sign she had a life to lead apart from Gabriel’s, but no, the weekends were always his. She glanced her cell phone. When they were apart, he called. She toyed with reaching out to Jessie, but couldn’t muster the strength.

It had been six months since Jack moved out. She fell apart when their marriage ended because she feared the emptiness. Now, by loving Gabriel, she had opened herself to the same pain. Only this pain would be worse since he had never hurt her before, not even a little. This pain would leave an unspeakable void since she didn’t know how to be without him. Jack had given her years of practice. Resigning herself to a life of solitude, Isabella trudged upstairs and went to bed.

***

Gabriel

In Montreal, Gabriel laid awake in bed. He looked at the vacant side of the bed, the side where Isabella should at this very moment be resting her lovely head. He would hold her, stroke her, kiss her and cuddle her. Always he would long for more, long to truly make her his, but would hold back, knowing she would let him know when it was right.

He rolled over, but that, too, was no good for now he stared at his phone on the nightstand that he should be using to call Isabella and tuck her in long distance. They had been doing that for since May. Was it only five months?  He tried, but couldn’t remember his life without her. He tried to picture his future, but there was no future imaginable without Isabella in it.

Laughing, he thought,
you fool. How could you allow yourself to love a woman that much?
  But this was Bella he was talking about. How could he not love her?

***

Isabella

The weeks passed, slowly, painfully. At first Isabella feared the phone ringing. Still hurt and angry, she didn’t know how she would react if she heard from him. Then a new nagging fear entered her mind, the fear of Gabriel never calling again.

Rebecca and Konnor were also feeling the loss. The first Friday, Rebecca carried down a bag overflowing with toys and games. “I want to bring this with us,” she announced.

Isabella had been frozen in her spot. “We’re not going,” she managed.

“Oh,” Rebecca said excitedly. “So Gabriel is coming here?”

“Not this weekend,” Isabella answered quietly.

Rebecca stared at her a moment as if she wanted to ask more, but finally thought better of it and went off to play.

The worst part was Isabella had no idea how to fill all of the quiet time she now had. She could only take so many photographs, crop and edit them, and work on her gallery show for so long. The show seemed hollow now without Gabriel to share it with. Thankfully, Jessie was a welcome distraction.

“So, Stephen is sick. I can’t leave Jeff alone with him. You understand.”

“Of course I do.” Still, she couldn’t help feeling disappointed.

“I’m sure he’ll be better by the weekend. Maybe we can do something then.”

Isabella brightened. “Let’s go to the spa.”

“The spa?” Jessie was quiet as she considered the idea. “We haven’t gone in a while. You know, since Gabriel took care of those needs.”

“Yup, the good old days.” She sighed. “You know, now that I’m on the market again I need to look my best.” She let out a hollow laugh.

“Why don’t you call him?”

Isabella sighed. “Because he should call me. I left. It’s his duty to call.” She paced the length of the kitchen. “Only now,” she mumbled, “it’s too late to call. It has been too long. Obviously, he doesn’t care.” She cleared her throat. “So, how about it?  Spa Saturdays again?”

“Sounds perfect. Then we can feel rejuvenated before we take the kids trick-or-treating. Wanna meet up for it?” Jessie apparently decided to sweeten the deal. “We could even have some adult time while they’re in their sugar comas. What do you say?”

“Glorious. Twist my arm.” Finally, Isabella didn’t have to worry about doing Halloween alone. “We have to stop by mom’s. She’ll be on her best behavior with you around.” Inwardly, she heaved a sigh of relief.

Chapter Fourteen

Gabriel

The doorbell rang. He heard it. He just wasn’t going to get up off the couch and get it. There really wasn’t anyone he wanted to speak to. He closed his eyes until it rang again, more insistently. Annoyed, he stood and walked to the door. “What?” He snapped when he saw his friends standing there.

“Gabe,” Matty said with concern, “we’re worried about you. What’s going on?  No one has heard from you or seen you in weeks. Where’s Isabella?”

He ignored their questions and simply trudged back to the living room and flopped down on the couch. His friends followed. Gabriel watched as they looked about the room for clues. They wouldn’t find anything. The place was immaculate, and barely looked lived in. Somehow, even though it looked as it always had, the apartment lacked the warmth it had when Isabella inhabited it.

Sebastian walked over to the door that had once been locked shut. With nothing left to hide, the door now remained open. Gabriel didn’t move, but sat there patiently while Sebastian studied the contents and emitted a low whistle.

“Oh my God.” His eyes widened with wicked delight. “Come here,” Sebastian called to his friends. “You have got to see this.”

One by one the guys filed off the couches to visit the mysterious room. All of them began murmuring low ‘whoas.’  Ben lingered, the last to move. He studied Gabriel and mouthed ‘kids’ room.’  Gabriel nodded.

“Whose room is that?” Sebastian asked.

Wordlessly, Gabriel took out his wallet and passed around a worn picture of Rebecca and Konnor he’d been carrying with him since the Disney trip. One by one, they looked at the picture and passed it on until it was finally back in his hands where he tucked it back into his billfold.

“The little girl looks so much like Isabella,” Ben remarked.

Gabriel nodded and sniffled. “Rebecca. I know. She is so much like her mother. You wouldn’t believe how smart she is, but then she speaks and well...” He paused realizing he was not only babbling, but giving himself away.

“Don’t tell me you like them?” Sebastian asked incredulously.

“No,” Gabriel said shaking his head. “Nope. I don’t like them.” He gulped. “I love them.” The last phrase came out a whisper.

There was a pause. No one moved or spoke for a moment. Naturally, Sebastian was first to break the silence. “Who are you?” He shook his head. “This was not the Gabriel we all know and love. Gabriel is happy, cheerful, fun loving. Most of all, Gabriel is superficial. He doesn’t get attached to chicks, and definitely not chicks with brats.”

Gabriel glared at him as he leaned closer and spoke in a menacing voice. “Don’t ever disrespect them again. Got it?” His hands folded into fists as he spoke.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Come out for a late lunch and a few drinks with us. We’ll make it all better.”

Matty agreed. “Yeah. We won’t take ‘no’ for an answer. It has been too long since we’ve done this.”

They stood to leave. Ben lingered and motioned that they needed to talk. “I’ll drive separately with Ben,” Gabriel said quickly. “We’ll be right there. I just have to get ready.” He gestured to his attire, which was something akin to a nineties grunge band.

As soon as they left and the door closed, Ben spoke. “I’ve never seen you like this before.” He studied his friend with a worried look. “You need a haircut.”

Reaching up, Gabriel raked his fingers through his hair. It was curling slightly around his ears and at the back of his neck. “Yeah. I know. I just…stopped caring.”

“And sleeping?  Your eyes look dead.”

By now, he frustrated. “Fuck, Ben. I’ve lost everything that matters. Could you give me a goddam break?”

“I’m your friend. I’m worried about you.” Ben stared at him solemnly. “What happened?  Where’s Isabella?”

“My father found out. He doesn’t approve. And Isabella is angry that I kept the kids a secret.” He rubbed his face in a tired fashion. “I lied and I lost.”

Ben leaned across the space between them, desperate to offer Gabriel encouragement. “You don’t have to. It’s never too late.”

“Of course it is. I’ve let three weeks pass while I wallowed around in self-pity. I can’t call now.” He looked forlornly at Ben.

“No, that’s true; it is too late to call. If you really want Isabella back, you’ll go to her.” He smiled encouragingly.

Gabriel shook his head. “She’ll probably just reject me. She has probably moved on.” Even as he said the words he looked at Ben, eager to be fed even some dim ray of hope.

“Nah,” Ben said, “I’ve seen the way you two look at each other. You don’t get over that in three weeks. You don’t even get over that in a life time.”

“You think so?” He wanted to cling to some kind of hope.

Ben nodded. “Go to her.”

Half an hour later as he was dropping Ben off at the pub, Gabriel leaned over and called out to his friend. “Give them my apologies!”

Turning toward him, Ben asked, “What should I tell them?”

Gabriel tilted his head to the side, thinking. “Oh, I don’t know.” Then he smiled. “Tell them something they’ll understand. Tell them I had some important business to take care of.”

Ben smiled widely. “I’ll say.”

The drive to the Charmant Estate was not remotely long enough for Gabriel to plan the talk he needed to have with his father. He knew he must choose his words carefully for their livelihoods were so closely intertwined. Just another one of the hazards of working with family, Gabriel muttered to himself as he parked the car in front of the steps.

The butler ushered him in and offered to announce him, just as he would any guest, but Gabriel rejected the idea. Instead, he simply asked where he might locate his father, then marched toward the study as the butler indicated. The door stood ajar. When he entered the office without knocking, he discovered his father was on the phone, with his back to the door. After ending the call he, turned and discovered Gabriel leaning in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest.

He stared evenly at his son. “So what brings you here?”

Gabriel walked over to the leather sofa and sat very deliberately, facing his father. “We need to talk,” he explained.

“About what?” Mr. Charmant asked stiffly.

“Bella,” he responded firmly.

His father uttered an exasperated sigh. “Now what has she done?”

Gabriel anticipated this. “She hasn’t done anything. I have. I let her down.” He leaned forward and balanced his elbows on his knees. “I knew you would reject anyone with children without even giving them a chance. I didn’t want it to be over with Bella before it had even begun.” He leaned back, half talking half remembering. “I didn’t know I was going to fall in love with her. You remember me back then. She was, I’ll admit, simply a diversion at first. She intrigued me. I had my life here on the weekends, and I had someone there to spend time with during the week. It made my summer pass very quickly, and pleasantly.” He smiled recalling their time together. “But the more I saw her, the more I wanted to see her. I guess it might have been a game at first. Did you know she wouldn’t even give me her number?” He looked at his father for feedback.

“I didn’t realize that, no.” He still sat stiffly, arms crossed on the desk.

“Oh. Well, she had been hurt very badly, I think, by her husband. She was so cautious. She was so charming, so shy, so...alluring.” He sat up suddenly, breaking the reverie. “I don’t know how it happened. Somehow I just fell in love. It scared the life out of me. It still does. But now,” he said seriously, pausing to make eye contact with his father, “now I’m more afraid that she no longer loves me back.”

Gabriel stood and walked over to the large mahogany desk. Placing his hands on it, and leaning over to make eye contact with his father. “I just wanted you to know that I’m going after her. And if, by the grace of God, she takes me back I’ll never let her go again.
And
,” his look grew intense, “I want you to give her and her children a chance.” He stood and waited for a response.

“Just what does that mean, ‘you’ll never let her go’?” His father gazed at him intently with narrowed eyes.

“I think you know what that means, father,” Gabriel said quietly.

“You mean to marry her?” He asked in disbelief, dismissing the idea immediately with a wave of his hand. Then he rose from his seat and walked around the desk and pointed to the chair behind Gabriel. “Sit, please, while we talk.” They sat in two leather armchairs facing each other.

Twiddling his fingers, Mr. Charmant seemed to ponder where to begin. “I loved a woman with children once.” Gabriel’s eyes widened. “She didn’t tell me about them until we were engaged. Her husband had been killed in a war. I never even knew she was married before. Well, naturally I broke off the engagement. She begged me not to. Her children needed a father, she said. She needed someone to take care of her. That is when I left, and met your mother in Casablanca. So you see you too will find happiness some day.” He smiled as though everything should be clear now.

Confused, Gabriel shook his head. “That has nothing to do with Bella and me.” He threw his hands up in exasperation. “That situation is nothing like ours. And where is your happiness?  You and Ava are divorced!” He stood. “I’m going to her now.”

“If you do, I’ll...I’ll…” His father struggled to find something to take away.

“You’ll what father?” Gabriel asked bored.

“I’ll cut you out of the company!” Satisfied, he leaned back in the chair, smirking.

“No, you won’t. You need me. I’m the reason we’re as international as we are. You need my language skills, and my people skills. If you cut me out, I’ll no longer be your asset, but I will become your competition.”

“My what?” Mr. Charmant spat.

“I will go into business for myself. You did it. And you taught me the ropes very well. Oh, and I’m sure I could take several of our largest clients with me. Your choice.”

There was a moment of silence as they stared, measuring each other up. Satisfied that they were at a standoff, Mr. Charmant sighed. Dark eyes blazing, he said through tight thin lips, “I see you have thought this through.” He folded his hands in his lap. “Very well. Go to Isabella, though you may grow to regret this decision.”

“My only regret father,” Gabriel replied on his way to the door, “is that I ever lied to you and Bella.” With a smile on his face and a spring in his step, he rushed to the car.

The plan seemed good in theory. Race to Bella’s barn, apologize, sweep her off her feet, and live happily ever after. The closer Gabriel came to reaching Bella, the more he realized he simply wakened himself to the possibility of rejection. Gabriel had never been rejected. Oh, he had often been the rejecter, but never the rejected. He knew what he had to do.

***

Isabella

A knock sounded on the door. It was a little early for trick-or-treaters, but who was she to judge. Grabbing the bowl of candy she had prepared, she walked over and opened the door. In front of her stood a giant donkey. Not a real one, a man sized standing one.

“Aren’t you a little big for this?” She laughed even as she grabbed a handful of candy to give the kid. She looked first at one hand, then the other. “What should I do with the candy?  You didn’t bring a bucket or an old pillow case.”

“I’m not here for candy.” The guy quickly removed the donkey head. It was Gabriel. He looked so different from the way she had always seen him. Before he exuded this impregnable air of confidence, but today he looked disheveled and scared.

Her smile faded as she tried to decide what to say. “Nice costume. Suits you.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

Clearing his throat, Gabriel began softly, “In my country, it is customary that when a person knocks on a door and the door is answered, he is invited in.” He attempted a feeble smile.

“I know I live in a barn, but we don’t let livestock inside.” She stared at him evenly. How many days and nights had she dreamed she would open the door and find him standing there?  Too many. Now he was here and she was pushing him away.

Stepping out of his costume, Gabriel leaned against the doorframe. “Is this better?”

“I don’t know.” She shook her head in frustration. “I let you in once and ultimately you hurt me. I thought you’d never hurt me.”

He winced. “I never meant to hurt you, Bella. You let me into your house and into your heart, and I betrayed you. I know this.” Gabriel leaned his head against his forearm. “I was afraid my father wouldn’t accept your kids. I let him matter more than us. It’s hard being accepted as an adult and getting out from under his thumb.” He stared intently at her. “Please forgive me. No more lies. I’ll never put my father before you and the kids again.”

Isabella studied him standing there. He
seemed
, truly sorry. She wanted to believe him, but self-preservation mode kicked in. “I don’t know.” She gazed at him warily.

“I love you, Bella. I’m still learning. I make mistakes. The only thing perfect about me is my love for you.”

His words softened her already weak resolve. “You may not be perfect, but you’re perfect for me,” she murmured with a wistful smile. He smiled and then she stiffened. “But I don’t want to open myself up to be hurt once more.”