Fired Airline Ticket Agent Reveals Airline Secrets (5 page)

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Question:
What kind of "sob stories" do you hear?

Answer:
The worst was, during a Christmas rush from Newark to Miami, with all flights on all carriers booked solid; I had about 6 passengers that came up to the gate with "deaths in the family". Five of those six passengers had bought stand-by tickets months earlier for this date and it seemed like more than just coincidental that they had relatives conveniently die when they were flying home on stand-by.

 

Question:
What is the range of discretion that a gate agent has for accepting tickets that are not exactly for the flight being boarded...i.e. do I really have to reissue a ticket for the same destination when I've simply taken a later or earlier flight? My travel agent says yes, I believe no.

Answer:
It varies from airline to airline but, overall, it doesn't matter if it is the same airline and destination. The only difference is the boarding pass.

 

Question:
Why is it that the agent cannot easily find a tall person an aisle seat or better yet, an emergency exit row seat?

Answer:
There is no consideration when assigning a seat for someone who is tall or overweight. The best answer is to make sure that, when you book the flight, you ask for aisle and exit row seating. Some airlines reserve these seats, or a percentage of them, for their frequent flyers.

 

Question:
Does the gate agent have the flexibility of upgrading coach passengers to first class on seat availability, usually at a cost of $50 or so?

Answer:
Some airlines do have that and post notices at their counters when they do. Some don't. It's best to ask a supervisor for that airline's policy.

 

Question:
What is the most important advice you would give to an airline passenger?

Answer:
Show up 1.5 hours before your domestic flight, if you need to be ticketed, 1 hour if not. Show up 2.5 hours for your international flight, if you need to be ticketed, 2 hours if not. Be courteous to the staff and try to take the little stuff in stride.

 

Technical Trouble

 

Ever board a flight that went nowhere? Maybe the plane just rolled out onto the runway and then returned to the gate, or worse still, it never even moved? This happens all the time. Although neither the Department of Transportation nor the Federal Aviation Administration collect statistics on mechanical delays, experience tells us that roughly 5 percent of all scheduled flights are hampered by some kind of "technical" trouble. Just look at an airline's delay numbers, discount the weather, and you've got a good idea of the kind of havoc mechanical problems can wreak on a carrier's schedule. Don’t think you’re the only passenger who’s been on a plane that’s had a mechanical issue. This happens multiple times, and it happens on a daily basis.

 

Mechanical Semantics

 

None among us would be in favor of taking off with broken engines or flaps. But is that usually what they're talking about when they tell us our flight has been grounded because of mechanical trouble? Often it's not. It seems carriers have begun adopting a very generous definition of "mechanical" trouble. When an apologetic flight attendant gets on the PA system and announces that you're stuck because the aircraft is "experiencing mechanical problems," it might be that it's an aircraft other than yours that's, in fact, having trouble. Or the problem might not be the kind that you would think would ground a plane—a clogged toilet, perhaps, or a button that's not illuminating. Airline insiders say carriers have canceled flights for everything from a broken coffeemaker to wet glue under the windshield to rather vague (read nonexistent) "engine irregularities."   They call it mechanical trouble, but that’s not exactly what it is. Well then, what is it? It could be a couple of things. According to Paul Hudson, executive director of the Aviation Consumer Action Project, a nonprofit consumer advocacy group based in Washington, D.C., "there's an interest in exaggerating mechanical delays, because they're excluded from on-time performance statistics kept by the FAA." So if a plane is running late, just call it a mechanical delay and it won't go on the airline's record. Heck, cancel the flight—it won't matter. It’s all about the numbers!

 

Convenient Excuse

Airlines routinely cancel under booked flights for "mechanical" reasons and send travelers out on a later flight. What the airline won't tell you is that your plane works just fine. It's another aircraft—perhaps one that's got more passengers on it—that's broken. Yes, it’s a joke, we were telling passengers that the flight is canceled because of a mechanical problem, but what we really should have been saying is that their plane is needed elsewhere. If you're still a skeptic, I invite you to check out the "departures" screen on your next layover in Denver or Atlanta. Try this on a day when the weather is quiet and there are few passengers in the terminal. Saturdays and Sundays are best. Now count the number of cancellations and ask yourself: what are the odds of that many flights succumbing to mechanical trouble at the same time? On a layover in Dallas on a typical week, with the weather clear as a bell, you’ll see a whole column of cancellations. Unless there's a saboteur at work at DFW, I figured this was prime example of airline cancellation greed.

 

Worst Offenders

Which airlines have a lot of dubious cancellations? Charters are the worst, mostly because they only operate a limited number of aircraft. For them, a "mechanical" problem can be something as insignificant as a stopped-up toilet. Not every airline pulls this stuff. Last year, after one of its flights from New York to London broke down, British Airways offered to re-book the stranded passengers. Only one traveler, who happened to be related to a flight attendant, refused to go. He wasn't in any hurry, he said, and would gladly take the flight once it was fixed. He ended up being the lone passenger on the Boeing 747. "It was a little embarrassing, to be honest, having only one passenger on that flight," says British Airways spokeswoman Margie Vodopia. Her carrier's rule is simple. It operates the flights whether they're overbooked or under booked. I like that policy.

 

Things you probably didn’t know about your seat

 

I never thought I’d see so many crazy things while working at the airport. I never knew how things worked That is, until I worked there about a month. We were constantly hiding things from passengers, or at least that’s how it seemed.

 

Here’s an example of something the ticket agent commonly hides from passengers : One passenger came up to the ticket counter with his wife and two children. He had a ticket, which was a confirmed ticket, and which he had paid for. But, what his travel agent hadn’t set up were his seats. When I checked him in, and his children, the computer said “added passenger to the standby list.” So, I stared at the screen confused. I had only been working there less than a month, so I thought I had done something wrong. I asked the person in charge of training what happened, and he said, “oh, don’t worry, just send them to the gate. Tell them they’ll get their seats there.” So, that’s exactly what I did. But, when the passengers left, I questioned what had happened. Here’s how my trainer explained it to me.

All airlines overbook their flights. So, if you don’t book your seat (reserve the seat) when you make your reservations, you aren’t confirmed on that flight. When the customer went to the gate with his family, he waited for the gate agent to give him seats that didn’t exist. The flight was overbooked by 50 passengers, and unfortunately the only seat he and his family had was going to be in the airport; they weren’t really going anywhere. But, the ticket agent isn’t allowed to disclose how overbooked the flight is. What the agents are told to do during training is basically lie to the passengers. When there aren’t enough seats, just lie, and send them to the gate, letting them know that the seat will be assigned at the gate. Some of you may be thinking, well, it’s not exactly a lie, but when the flight is overbooked by 50, and you’ve been checked in and added to the standby list as the 20
th
or 30
th
person on the list, there is a very little chance that person will be on that flight. So, here’s an important tip: when you make a reservation, make sure you reserve your seats, and make sure they are reserved together. Otherwise, you may not get a seat, because airlines give standby seats to their frequent travelers first. Something the passenger doesn’t know is that there are certain seats (like the front row seats of coach class) that are reserved for frequent travelers. The agents will tell you that those seats are taken, but instead, those are not taken, they are reserved for people who have spent plenty of money traveling with the airline.

 

Passenger Profiling on International Flights

 

Ok, so we touched on this earlier, but let’s go through it again, in more detail. What are the check-in ticket agents told to do if someone comes up and hands them a passport and they look suspicious. Well, the airline cannot, by law, keep someone from boarding a plane, even if they look suspicious. But, what are the agents allowed to do? Well, there is something called a PPBM tag that the agents are advised to put on the passengers bag. The tag, “positive passenger bag match,” is used to make sure the passenger is on the same plane as his bags. Here’s how it works. The suspicious passenger, let’s call him Mr. Profiled, checks in, and the agent just thinks he looks suspicious. This isn’t written anywhere in the training manual, but this is what the trainers will tell you to do. The ticket agent is instructed to place a PPBM tag on the passenger’s bag. On the tag, a number is written, known as the sequence number. This number is also written on the passenger’s boarding pass. When the passenger goes to the Gate, this bag tag makes sure the suspicious passenger gets on the plane. If the passenger just checks in but misses the flight, the bags he checked in with the PPBM tag are removed from the plane. The idea behind these PPBM tags is that terrorists theoretically will check in bags and then won’t get on the aircraft, because they’ve checked in a bag with a bomb (suicide bombers aside). Next time you check in for a flight (for an international destination), check to see if your tag says PPBM or has an extra tag (usually very bright in color) with a sequence number. The tag can mean one of two things—either the computer randomly chose you to have a PPBM tag, or you looked suspicious to the agent that was checking you in.

 

Joking about the FAA security questions

 

Well, if you have ever traveled, or will ever travel, you will have heard or will hear the FAA security Questions. The two questions are as follows: “Has anyone unknown to you asked you to carry anything aboard the aircraft?” and “Have any of the items you are traveling with today been out of your control since the time you packed them?” They may not be asked in this exact manner, but the questions should always be asked by the agent before they check you in. Well, here are a few things you should know about those security questions. First of all, everyone traveling is supposed to answer them. However, most of the time, when someone is checking in their entire family, they will give the agent all the tickets, and all the passports at once, and everyone will be doing something random around the check-in counter, like checking their cell phones, talking on the phones, texting, etc. So, obviously, the question does not get asked to everyone who boards the aircraft. Many people wonder, does anyone answer the questions wrong? Does anyone say, “Yes, the bags were out of my possession.” Well, the answer is yes. It doesn’t happen very often, but it does happen. Some people will say, “Yes, the bags were out of my control, they were in the hotel room with some people we didn’t know.” Well, here’s what happens if the questions are answered incorrectly. The agent has to call security, and someone usually comes within 15 minutes. The security agent takes the bags, and the passengers to the security checkpoint. The bags are open, put through several security and x-ray machines under the supervision of the security supervisor, and fully checked for any explosives. Most of the time, if the passenger answers incorrectly to the security questions, they end up missing their flight, because of the length of time it takes to have their bags checked. Something that’s worth mentioning here is that there should be no joking when answering the security questions. Many people tend to think the questions are annoying or even funny, and when they are asked the questions, they will laugh and make jokes. This is strongly discouraged. Joking about the FAA security questions is a felony, and doing so could lead to your arrest. Some people will joke, “oh yes, there’s a bomb in my bag.” Answering in this way is illegal, and you could be punished for it to the fullest extent of the law. Depending on the agent you find, they could immediately call security or the local police and have you arrested. Another thing you should be sure not to joke about it threatening to kill an agent or blow up the airport. This may sound kind of absurd at first, but you’d be surprised how often it happens. I have been threatened many times from passengers who came to the airport late, and could not make the flight. Also, people who had missed their flight would threaten that if they weren’t on the flight that was taking off, they would blow up the airport. Instances like that are sure to be reported as soon as they occur.

BOOK: Fired Airline Ticket Agent Reveals Airline Secrets
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