Finding Home: A Club Dark Novel (10 page)

The air between us is awkward, to say the least, neither of us knowing what to say to the other. She’s the first to break the silence, “How’s everything going?” I can’t tell if she’s asking because she really wants to know or because she doesn’t know what else to say, but I answer anyway.

“Okay, I guess. Besides the constant paranoia and the awful feeling of not knowing, I can’t really complain. Cory has been beyond amazing through all of this, but it feels like I’m stuck in limbo,” I say, not really meaning to dump so much on her, and I especially don’t mean to sound so bitchy when I’m talking. Logically I know none of this is her fault, but I can’t help feeling a little bitter toward her. Not only was she the one who invited me out that night, but she was also the one making my drinks. I think subconsciously I just need someone to blame, and she is the easier target. Besides, it’s been weeks since she’s even checked on me to see how things were going and if I was okay, and that stings a little. I know we only knew each other a few hours before everything happened but still.

She looks like she’s about to say something, but our waitress walks up. I look up at the woman and I can’t help but feel a little sorry for her, she looks completely worn out. She has deep dark circles under her eyes and her hair is a frazzled mess, but she still puts forth the effort to smile at us before taking our orders. I have to commend her for her strength. She clearly looks like she’s having it rough right now, but still, she’s pressing on with a smile on her face.

“What can I do for you ladies this evening? Might I suggest our signature Reuben? Our corned beef briskets are sliced and cooked fresh daily. We make our own secret sauce and pick only the finest of cheeses. It’s served on fresh rye and your choice of soup. It also pairs perfectly with our house-crafted Ale.” Like the bartender, she sounds like she’s reading from a script. I really want to like this place, but damn if these people don’t reek of boredom.

“That sounds perfect for me, any soup will do. I’d also love a martini, dry please,” Amber says.

“I’ll just have a grilled chicken Caesar salad and an ice water with fresh lemon please.” Sorry, but no alcohol for me. I just don’t trust it. I feel a vibration in my pocket and pull my phone out to see there’s a text from Cory. It’s nice to see your spirit has returned. Are you sure you can handle the heat? I feel my cheeks warm as I smile, all but forgetting I’m in the presence of others. Sliding my phone back in my pocket without responding, I turn my attention back to the waitress.

"I’ll have your drinks right out; your food should only take a few minutes.” Our waitress, whom I’m just now realizing has no name tag nor does she offer to introduce herself, gathers our menus and walks away.

“Is it just me, or does little miss sunshine have a stick up her ass?” And just like that, some of the tension between us just melts away.

“Seems like everyone in this joint could use some unwinding or a few strong drinks.” We laugh and I start to relax; getting out of that house and having a normal day is exactly what I needed.

“Maybe sunshine and gloomy over there are secret lovers and he’s mad because she won’t suck his popsicle.”   O.M.G, I think as I burst out laughing. That’s probably the corniest thing I’ve ever heard.

“Seriously,” she begins, and there is a note of seriousness in her voice that wasn’t there moments ago. I look up at her face and notice her expression is back to looking indifferent. At least that’s how I would describe it. “I’m sorry I haven’t checked in on you. I just didn’t know what I would say. We really don’t know each other, and I feel like I’ve ruined what chance we might have had at building a friendship. I still feel somewhat responsible that you got hurt on my watch.” She sounds so vulnerable and so sincere that it makes my chest ache for the guilt she has. I can tell she’s not used to showing this side of herself to other people.

After hearing her voice, the regret and sorrow in it, I realize how stupid I’ve been acting. Would I love to have someone to blame? Yes, of course. But this does not fall on her. And I will damn well make sure Cory sees that too. She was only being nice and helping me get acquainted with my new home. I have no right for faulting her when she was just trying to be a good person. She even tried to warn me about taking it easy on the drinks, and I dismissed her. Sure I was drugged and I didn’t just consume too much alcohol, but perhaps had I listened to her and paced myself I might have noticed that something was off with my drink.

“Amber, this is in no way your fault. If anything, it’s mine. I’m a big girl and should’ve been paying better attention.” I reach my hand across the table and rest it on her arm, trying to convey to her that I’m serious.

“Yeah, but I was serving your drinks, and Cory had specifically asked me to keep an eye on you. I screwed up, and I’m really lucky to have my job right now.” The look on her face says she’s close to tears, and all I want to do is reassure her and make her feel better.

“Why would you even think that? The place was packed; you couldn’t have your eyes on me the whole time, not to mention that you shouldn’t have had to, I’m an adult, Amber, it was my responsibility to protect myself especially in a new city and a new club. And that amount of pressure shouldn’t have been laid on your shoulders.” I keep going, trying to figure out the right words to say to her; the ones that will ease the guilt she feels, but then she puts her hand up asking me to let her speak.

“I don’t think it’s about blame with Cory. He likes control, and right now, he doesn’t feel like he has any. He feels like I’m the one who should’ve been paying better attention to you.”

At the mention of Cory’s name, I feel a blush start to rise up my face and my heart starts to race. I feel ridiculous, never in my life have I acted like this about a guy, and I really hope that Amber doesn’t notice my reaction.

“I have known Cory for a long time now, and I have never seen him so protective of someone so quickly. Sure he takes care of all of his girls and makes sure that things at the club run smoothly, but he has never made it a point to tell me to watch out for someone, and I’ve certainly never seen him take a girl home before.” I really want her to continue what she is saying, but just then our waitress comes walking over to bring us our drinks followed by a young boy carrying a tray with our food.

He can’t be any older than fourteen or fifteen. He places our food on the table, giving Amber my salad and her sandwich to me. He gives us a shy smile and walks back to the kitchen behind the bar.

“Sorry about that,” our nameless waitress says as she switches our plates. “That’s my son, Calvin. He likes to help sometimes when his dad gets drunk.” Now I understand why she looks so tired and weary. If she and her son are having to pick up the slack after dear old daddy, that can wear a person down.

“Thank you,” Amber and I say together.

The food smells great, and I waste no time diving in. I must say, despite the depressing tone this place seems to carry, their salad is probably the best I’ve ever tasted. They must make their own dressing to, it has a certain…flair to it.

“You were right. It’s not a Philly, but their food is great.” While I’m chewing my food I take a minute to look around again and notice that in the brief time that Amber and I have been talking the place has really filled up. There’s almost no seating available, and at least three other waitresses are now taking orders. I can see the kid, Calvin, is now zooming in and out of the kitchen. One second, he’s carrying drinks, the next another tray of food. I really feel sorry for the kid.

“When did all these people get here?” I ask, laughing. I can’t believe I got so lost in our conversation that I would lose focus of my surroundings.

Interrupting my internal rambling, Amber answers the question I forgot I’d asked. “I’m not sure, but seems like little Calvin over there is getting a little action.” She makes kissy faces and points across the room to where the kid is standing in front of an older lady. She appears to be pinching his cheeks. People still do that? Poor kid.

Getting back to the conversation we were having before our food arrived I ask, “How has Cory been at work?” I’m genuinely curious. When she said he likes control, I didn’t really see it. Sure, he’s got this dark, brooding, sexy thing going on, but he hasn’t struck me as a control freak. Then again, I don’t work for him.

“Mostly, he seems to be okay. But you can tell it’s eating at him. I mean, how does someone get access to a secure security feed and do it completely undetected? That by itself is enough to throw him off his rocker. Couple that with what happened with you, and I’m afraid the man is certifiable,” she says with a laugh, but quickly gets serious again.

“He’s really tightened up security around there, and I think it’s scaring people away. There’s a man at every door. No one can enter or leave without consenting to a search. Anyone carrying drugs is automatically blacklisted from ever joining the club again. He’s also added two more bartenders and a barback, which really sucks because that cuts my hours, customers, and income.” Amber might hate all of this, but besides cutting her hours, I find it hard to feel bad over any of it. Maybe I can talk to Cory about what Amber can do to earn her hours.

“I’m sorry, Amber, but maybe it’s for the best.” She gives me a dirty look and it almost makes me want to take it back but not quite.

“You try making a living when half your wages are now being shared with an untrained, spoiled little brat. And to top it all off, I’ve got to train the little twit. At least the other guys have two brain cells firing.” There’s the witty Amber I’m learning to love; this girl is definitely one of a kind.

I’m just about to respond when I feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand at attention and a feeling of dread takes over my whole body. Something is definitely not right. Instinctively, I glance around the bar again and suddenly feel claustrophobic, which has never happened before. I’ve never had a problem being in a tight space or in large crowds, but for some reason right now my body is feeling hot and my heart is pounding.  Just in the last five minutes, it seems the customers have doubled. Is there no fire code in this place? We need to get out of here, now.

“There’s this really cute…” Amber begins to say but I cut her off.

“Are you ready to go?” I blurt out, the panic in my voice obvious.

“Umm, yeah sure. Are you okay?” The look on Amber’s face says I’m worrying her so I try and calm myself.

Taking a deep breath, I say, “I’m fine.” It’s a lie, but I don’t want to freak her out. “I just need some fresh air.” Where’s our waitress?

“Give me a second, and I’ll go locate our check,” Amber says as she stands and walks toward the bar.

I still feel eyes on me and it takes everything in me not to fidget in my seat. Nausea starts to come over me making my stomach roll. If we don’t leave soon, I’m afraid I’m going to be sick.

Amber heads back toward our table, this time, with a little more sway to her hips. I catch the eyes of the bartender on her backside. No doubt she was just flirting with him. The girl has no shame.

“It appears our check has been settled, as well as the tip,” she says, sliding back into the booth.

“What?! Who paid it?” Now I’m really creeped out. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t care, but this doesn’t feel normal.

She shrugs her shoulders. “He said it was anonymous. Who cares? Let’s get out of here.”

I shake my head back and forth and I’m sure I look crazy, but I don’t care. “Something doesn’t feel right about this, Amber.” I’m panicking and making no sense, but she doesn’t understand.

“Stuff like this is not unheard of, Lace, chill out. It’s not every day you get a free meal, just enjoy it,” she laughs. There is no way in hell I can just chill, not after what’s already happened. I pull my wallet out to leave my own tip and make my way out the door walking much faster than necessary but not wanting to be in this place any longer.

As soon as I’m out the doors, it feels as if a huge boulder is lifted from my chest, and I can breathe easy again. I look over at Amber and see the concerned look on her face. I’m not ready to answer any of her questions, so I hurry over to her car. How can I even explain how looney I feel right now? Clearly, everything was okay back there, and I’m just over reacting. Ugh! Will my life ever be right again? Or will I al-ways be looking over my shoulders?

This changes now. I will no longer let fear consume me. I’m not that person, and I refuse to be any longer. Taking a deep breath, I calm myself and wait on Amber to reach the car. We have a few minutes of awkward silence before she speaks, asking the question I was hoping she wouldn’t. “How are you really doing, Lacey?”

It’s time to open up and be honest with myself and the people around me. “Honestly, I feel like I’m just getting by. I feel like I’m only ever exchanging one problem for another. I’m not used to feeling this way. I feel lost and confused. And most of all, I feel like an idiot. I couldn’t even watch out for myself for one night without screwing that up. And Cory? I can only imagine what he must think of me. I mean, it’s not every day you’re playing caretaker to a grown woman you don’t even know.”

I climb inside the car, feeling good to finally talk to someone. Amber gets inside and starts her car. It’s a few minutes before she says anything. “Cory is a good guy, Lacey. And he never does anything he doesn’t want to. He can be a bit of an ass sometimes, but that just comes with the territory.”