Finding Focus (33 page)

I clear my throat and she snaps out of whatever trance she was in.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” she murmurs, dipping her head to hide the heat on her cheeks, but I see it anyway. “I, uh . . . I just didn’t know you had tattoos.” Her stammer is adorable and the way she looks back up through her lashes and checks them out makes my cock stir.

Letting out a low chuckle, I turn around and walk into the bathroom to start her bath. I need a distraction before I show her more than my tattoos.

When she walks into the bathroom a few seconds later, I watch as she bites her lip and hides her face with her hair, obviously embarrassed or feeling uneasy, so I grab her arm and make her face me.

“Hey, don’t do that,” I tell her, pulling her lip from her teeth with my thumb. “I like that you were looking at me, and it’s okay if you don’t like my tattoos. They’re not for everyone.”

“No, I like them very much.” She blushes again, and I’m quickly reminded my arousal will be very obvious through this towel if I don’t get out of this bathroom right the fuck now.

I release her arm and walk to the door, putting some distance between us. “Thank you,” I tell her when I’m far enough away to keep from pulling her to me and never letting go. “Enjoy your bath.” I smile teasingly and waggle my eyebrows at her before closing the bathroom door behind me.

After we’re both cleaned up and dressed, we decide to take it easy for the night and hang out in the hotel bar for dinner. It ends up being a great decision because there’s a live band playing, and they’re actually really good.

“I’m still leery of liquor, so I think I’ll stick with beer tonight.”

“A beer sounds perfect right about now. Good call, Chuck.”

I laugh as she rolls her eyes at my nickname for her. I can’t help it. I’ve always given people nicknames. Maybe it’s a southern thing, I don’t know. I’m just glad she doesn’t scowl anymore when I say it.

“How are you feelin’ after the day you had?” I ask.

She’s quiet, which makes me worry I’ve upset her. When she looks up at me and smiles, I’m able to breathe again.

“I’m good. I’m really good, actually.”

I take her hand in mine and squeeze it. “I’m glad. You’re such a strong woman, Dani. I hope you know that.” I pause to keep myself from saying too much. “I think you’re amazing.”

She shakes her head like she doesn’t believe me, but it’s true and I feel better just getting it off my chest. She’s incredible.

After we finish our meal and listen to the band for a while, I notice Dani trying to hide a couple yawns. I’m kinda tired myself. It’s been a long day. So, I scoot my chair back and lean down until my mouth is at her ear. “Come on, sleepy head,” I say loud enough she can hear me over the music. “Let’s go to the room.”

I reach for her hand and toss some cash on the table. She doesn’t hesitate to take it, and I can’t help but love how good it feels simply holding Dani’s hand . . . just touching her.

It feels so good, in fact, I wrap my arm around her and pull her close to me in the elevator. Her arms fit perfectly around my waist, and she rests her head on my chest. I swear I hear her sniff my shirt, but I keep quiet.

Once we’re in the room, we quietly get ready for bed. I’m dying to know what she’s thinking—what she wants—but I’m following her lead tonight.

I’m already in bed with only my sleep pants on when she slips under the covers facing me. We simply lie there, staring at each other until she whispers, “Can I touch it?”

My mind goes straight to the gutter and by the look of horror on her face, hers does too, but she quickly corrects herself. “I meant your tattoo. Can I touch your tattoo?”

Not able to hold it in any longer, I throw my head back and laugh. We both do. We laugh so hard, we’re crying. This moment is absolutely perfect.

When we finally settle down, I move closer so she can touch the ink on my chest. Her finger lightly traces the lines of the oak tree, leaving a trail of goose bumps in its path. When she gets to where the roots of the tree spell the word “family” right over my heart, she removes her finger and kisses my skin.

Never has such a simple act felt so intimate . . . so powerful.

I don’t want to ruin this moment and break the spell we seem to be under, so I freeze and wait for her next move.

She places a soft kiss on my mouth before closing her eyes. I run my fingers through her hair, moving it away from her face, and whisper, “What do you want?”

Her eyes open, confusion shining bright. She twists her mouth and presses her lips together like she wants to say something or ask something, but she hesitates for a moment before finally asking me to hold her.

So I do.

When I wake the next morning, my arms are still wrapped around a sleeping Dani. Her head is on my chest, nestled under my chin. Her arm is loose around my waist. I’ve never felt so content. I don’t want to move. I don’t want to wake her. I just want to soak up as much of this moment as I can. The thought of her leaving and going back to New York has been plaguing me since yesterday. If this is the last time I get to do this for a while—or ever—I want to make the most of it. I want to memorize every soft breath, every freckle on her shoulder, the feel of her body against mine. When I look down at her, my chest feels tight. Watching her is pretty much the best thing in the entire universe. I feel so lucky to just know her, let alone get to be near her like this.

At least we have one more day, and I’m going to make the most of it.

The morning is quiet. It seems Dani is in quite the contemplative state as well. We move around each other like planets orbiting the sun—taking turns brushing our teeth, making sure the other doesn’t forget things in the room, and I make her a cup of coffee, just like I have every other morning we’ve been together.

When we get in the car, she lets out a heavy sigh.

“Everything okay?” I ask, reaching over to take her hand. Touching her is becoming second nature. I don’t even think before I do it. It’s going to kill me when I can’t do it on a regular basis.

“Yeah, just thinking.”

We drive in silence until we’re outside of Jackson’s city limits headed south on Interstate 55 toward Baton Rouge. The drive is less than three hours, so if we don’t make too many stops, we’ll be there a little after noon. Since we’re staying at my and Deacon’s apartment for the night, we’ll drop our bags off and freshen up before I take her to Grinders for dinner and show her a little bit of the city. I can’t wait for her to see the place. It’s something Deacon and I have put so much of ourselves into, I’m really proud of it.

The restaurant has kinda grown up with us. We started off small, taking out a small loan while I was still in college to buy an abandoned two-story building in the older part of downtown Baton Rouge. Most of the remodeling work we did ourselves or paid our buddies to do on the weekend, usually in beer and free food. Over time, it’s developed into a well-known establishment, catering to the college crowd and tourists. We bring a band in on Friday and Saturday nights. It’s a lot more citified than Pockets. There’re two levels, with the top level overlooking the small stage. A friend of Deacon’s hooked us up with a class-act lighting package, and although the bands we bring in are local, they’re fantastic. Almost as good as our food.

I look over at Dani and see she’s chewing on her bottom lip, obviously still deep in thought. I think about letting her be and hoping she works out whatever’s on her mind, but I can’t keep myself from asking her. If there’s something I can do to take the worry on her face away, I’ll do it.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

She leans her head back against the seat and turns her gaze from the window over to me.

“I want to get a tattoo.”

That wasn’t really what I was expecting, and I don’t think it’s what she’s been thinking about this whole time, but I’ll take what I can get.

“You know what you want?” I ask.

“I know exactly what I want.” Her eyes bore into mine, and I can’t help but wonder if her words have a double meaning. I can’t let myself get too hopeful.

“I can call my guy in Baton Rouge and see if he can work you in, if you’re serious.”

“That’d be great.” She gives me her first real smile of the day and I give her one in return. If a tattoo is what will make her happy, then I’ll make it happen. Besides, it’ll be hot, no matter what she gets.

Dani seems to be more relaxed the rest of the drive to Baton Rouge, not as quiet. We do a couple rounds of twenty questions and fight over the songs we’re going to play on the radio. Just normal shit.

Once we’re at the apartment, I bring our bags in while Dani freshens up.

“You want somethin’ to drink?” I ask her from the kitchen. When I don’t get an answer, I decide to look for her.

Seeing Dani standing in my bedroom, looking at my bed, makes my heart squeeze and my stomach tighten. I can’t resist walking up to her and wrapping my arms around her. She turns in my arms and lays her head against my chest.

“I wish you’d talk to me,” I whisper into her hair, wanting to know what’s bothering her and not caring if I sound desperate in the process.

She looks up at me before standing on her tiptoes and bringing her lips to mine. Her nails scratch at the scruff on my jaw as she kisses me gently. “We can talk about it later. Right now, I just want to enjoy this last day with you,” she says, almost pleading.

I swallow the lump in my throat as my worst fear comes true. This is it for us. When we get back to French Settlement, it will literally be the end of the road for us. Dani will go back to New York and I’ll go back to doing whatever it is I did before her. But I don’t want to. I don’t want that life. I want this one. The one where she’s in my arms. Where I make her coffee every morning. Where she falls asleep against my chest every night. That’s the life I want.

Pulling her face back to mine, I kiss her until we’re both breathless—until resolve settles into my bones.

If today is the last day we have, then I’m going to make it perfect. It might not be the right time to tell her how I feel, saying those words now might seem rushed or like I’m saying them to get something in return, but I can show her. I want her to know how much I want her, and not just for tonight—more like forever.

The first thing we do is grab lunch to-go from T.J. Ribs and bring it to the campus of my alma mater. I want her to see this. This place was such a vital part of my life and making me who I am today. I want to share it with her. I take us to a spot in the grass that gives us a perfect view of the Indian Mounds of LSU.

“This is beautiful,” Dani gushes as we sit on the blanket I’ve laid out for us.

“It’s one of my favorite spots here.”

“I can see why.” She kicks her shoes off onto the blanket and twists her hair up on her head. I love it when she does that. This is my favorite version of Dani—relaxed, natural. It seems as though she’s resolved to make the most of our time together, too. After our moment in the apartment earlier, it’s been light and fun ever since. “Thanks for bringing me here.”

“Thanks for wanting to come.”

She nods at me and smiles. I hand her her barbeque from the bag and grab mine as well. “We better eat up. Frank said he’d open up earlier just for us, so we need to be there by three, which means we’ve only got about an hour.”

“Should be enough time to eat this and kick back for a nap.” She winks at me, taking a big bite of her barbeque. The sauce dripping down her chin reminds me of the first night of our trip when she had ketchup all over her face. This time, instead of telling her about it, I lean over and lick it off.

She stops mid-chew, looking over at me. “Did you just lick me?” she asks, narrowing her eyes. She’s so damn cute.

“Yep.” I nod and casually take a bite of my food. “You taste delicious.”

The look on her face shifts from playful to something else—something like desire. I feel it, too. I’ve felt it mounting since the night we kissed at the pond. It’s like small sparks under my skin, slowly building to a roaring blaze.

“I can’t believe you licked me,” she says, still a bit dazed from whatever is happening between us.

I smile at her, shake my head, and focus on my food. “You sure you want to get a tat?” I ask, switching gears. “You know it’s permanent, right?”

“Yes, I know it’s permanent, and yes, I’m sure.”

“Do you know where you want it?”

“On my arm. I want to see it every day.”

That answer makes me happy. I was afraid she’d say on her back or hip, which would require her to remove her clothes. I know it’s crazy, and I know I haven’t even seen them, but I’m not fond of another guy seeing the goods.

“Are you gonna get something?” she asks, setting her mostly empty food container back in the bag.

“I was thinking about it.”

“Do you know what you’d want to get?”

“I always have something in mind, but I probably won’t decide until I get there.”

Once we finish eating, we lie back on the blanket, taking turns making out shapes in the clouds above us. There’s one that floats by I swear looks just like the poop emoticon. When she laughs uncontrollably, with her head on my chest, I drink it in. “You’re so gross,” she says, slapping at me playfully. I grab her hand and quickly roll her over, hovering above her, my arms caging her in.

“I’ll give you gross,” I tease, sticking my tongue out and inching it closer to her face.

“No!” she squeals, struggling to get away from me, but I have her trapped. “Micah!”

Before long, we’re a mess of twisted limbs, sweaty, laughing, and completely out of breath. I brush the hair off her face and cup her cheek. “You’re so beautiful.”

“So are you,” she says, honesty in her eyes. No one’s ever called me beautiful. It’s kind of a girl term, but I like it coming from her.

I kiss her for a few minutes, being mindful that we’re in public. Before things get too heated, I slowly pull back and take a good look at her, hoping when she goes back to New York and I’m missing her, I can close my eyes and remember her just like this.

“We better get going. Can’t keep Frankie waiting. He’s kind of a diva.”