Fighting Fate (16 page)

Only in the quietest corner of his mind did he ever entertain the idea that he’d run into Sarah again. Last he had heard, she’d left town and it didn’t sound as though she was ever coming back.

But, here she was.

He had seen her at Lucky’s Tavern. He had managed to finagle a job working on her house. He had seen her another time, walking into the grocery store. He’d been coming out of the bank across the street. Like a big, stalker-ish dope he’d just stood there gawking. A dopey smile had been plastered on his face as he’d watched her rummaging around in her purse. He had assumed that’s what he’d have to settle for once the work on her house was done. Stolen glances.

After this morning, he realized that wasn’t going to be the case. There was a damn good chance he’d be seeing her every single day. She could avoid him, sure. The school was big enough she could probably get away with that for the most part. But he hoped she wouldn’t. He hadn’t been able to tell by her expression what she thought of the latest turn of events. If he had to guess, he’d say she’d been too surprised to really wrap her mind around it quite yet. That’s how he’d felt. But now that he’d had a few hours to get used to the idea?

He liked it.

He liked it a lot.

He just hoped that it didn’t blow up in his face. It was possible Sarah would hate the idea. She might start closing herself off again after she had only just started opening up.

After his appointment at the district office—where he’d had to fill out page after page of paperwork—he’d gone to see his mom. The way she beamed at him, you would’ve thought he’d been elected president. Not just hired as one of two history teachers. He probably visited with her longer than he should have.

It was shortly after lunchtime when he pulled into Sarah’s driveway. Already the place was looking better. Sarah had clearly been spending time Sspegle day. in the yard after he left in the evenings. For the most part, the prior week she’d stayed indoors while he’d been out. He’d caught glimpses of her here and there, passing by a window, shaking a rug or walking out to get the mail. She’d been friendly but reserved.

He wasn’t going to fool himself. He knew he had a long way to go.

As he pulled up to the house, he had a clear view of her. She was standing on a stepstool. She had a spray bottle of blue liquid in one hand, a rag in the other. She was scrubbing the windows. He wasn’t particularly surprised that she didn’t bother to turn his way.

Disappointment coursed through him all the same. He hadn’t been expecting her to be excited by the fact that they would be working together. But he had really hoped that she wouldn’t go back to ignoring him.

He didn’t particularly blame her. He did, however, plan to change that. With a sigh he pulled to a stop and cut the engine. When she still didn’t acknowledge his presence, he took advantage of the moment.

The day was scorching yet again. She was wearing cut off shorts that were so short they didn’t leave a whole lot to the imagination. That didn’t stop him from letting his imagination run a little wild anyway. Her black tank top ended about an inch before her shorts began.

Her usually creamy skin was just starting to redden. If she didn’t get some sun block on soon, or go inside, she was going to burn.

“Sorry, I’m running a little later than I’d planned,” Cole said as he made his way up the steps. When Sarah still didn’t turn to look at him, he let out an agitated sigh. Seemed to him she was taking the silent treatment a little too far.

He reached over to give her a little nudge. Perhaps she caught his movement out of the corner of her eye because just as he reached up, she looked over and her eyes widened in surprise. In that same instant, he noticed the thin white cord dangling from her ear. It was instantly clear that she hadn’t been ignoring him after all. She simply hadn’t heard him over the sound of the music that she was listening to.

Too late, he realized how badly he had startled her. She shrieked as her body jerked backward and her arms flailed. The bottle of cleaner went flying. Her body flew one direction. The stepstool went the other.

Sarah was petite. Even still, a hundred plus pounds of girl-flesh being propelled his way was enough to make Cole stagger as he reached out to catch her. She slammed into him, knocking him backward into the porch railing. He cringed in that instant, hoping the old, rotting railing would hold. It did and he was instantly relieved.

“What the hell?” she cried as she smacked him across the shoulder. The earbuds had fallen out. She was dangling from his arms and he slowly eased her to her feet. “Why would you do that?!” She placed her hand over her chest and looked at him with wide, questioning eyes.

His first impulse was to grin back at her. He had a sudden u S+0"fy"rge to tell her that if that’s what it took to get her in his arms, he’d do it again. Instead of going with his impulse, he went for a little bit of common sense. He instinctively knew that Sarah would not appreciate teasing. Not from him. Not yet.

She took another step away from him and swiped the back of her hand across her sweaty forehead.

“You didn’t answer me. Why did you sneak up on me like that?” she demanded. She’d ground her fists into her hips. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly. He quickly tore his eyes away from the ample amount of cleavage that was exposed by the skimpy shirt.

He plastered a contrite expression onto his face. “Sorry. I didn’t know you were listening to music. I tried talking to you.”

“And you didn’t notice I didn’t hear you?” she demanded.

He shrugged and couldn’t help but smile at the feisty look on her face. “Honestly? I thought you were ignoring me.”

“Ignoring…?” she started and instantly stopped herself. He was sure for just an instant she was going to scoff at the idea. Then she seemed to think better of it.

She turned away from him. He was instantly sure his earlier fears were right. She was unhappy with how the morning unfolded. He expected her to march herself into the house, close the door behind her and not look back.

She didn’t.

“Let’s just do this,” she said. She motioned for him to follow her. He had no idea what she was referring to but he was anxious to find out. He followed her inside. She went to the sink, washed her hands and then pulled two glasses out of the cupboard.

“Is lemonade okay?” she asked.

“Lemonade is great,” he said.

She poured them each a glass and then headed off in the direction of the living room. Again, he followed. She handed him a glass, set two coasters on the coffee table and took a seat on the sofa. She patted the seat next to her.

He sat.

She raised her glass to him. “It’s not coffee but it’ll have to do. Let’s talk.”

This was exactly what he’d been waiting for. Now that she had demanded it of him, now that she was looking at him expectantly, he had no idea where to start. He was grateful for the drink in his hand. He took a long, slow sip, appreciative of the delay.

“Did you join the military?”

The question surprised him. He wondered how she knew, who she’d heard it from.

“I did,” he said as he gave her a slow nod.

She bounced around on the cushions not stopping until her back rested against the armrest. She was sitting so that she could face him, her legs crisscrosse Ss ctable and in front of her. Instead of using her coaster, she balanced her glass on her knee.

He tossed his arm over the back of the couch and turned so that he was facing her as much as he could without copying her position.

“How did you know that?”

“The t-shirt you had on the other day. It took a few hours for it to click. What the logo stood for, I mean. Even then, I figured you could’ve just liked the shirt. But I started to wonder. So, is that why you left town?”

As much as he wanted to talk to her, he hadn’t really thought through what he was going to say. Her question seemed simple but it wasn’t.

“I mean, why didn’t you just say so?” She frowned at him. “Is that why you broke things off with me the way you did? Were you afraid that if you kept me around, I would’ve tried to stop you? I’ve been tossing ideas around in my head all weekend. That’s the only conclusion I keep coming to.”

“Yeah,” he said on an exhale. It was a simplified version of the truth. Never mind that it was only
half
of the truth. But at least it was the truth.

“I still don’t get it,” she said. “You could’ve talked to me. I would’ve understood. I would’ve
supported
you. I knew how badly you wanted to get out of this town. I knew how desperate you were to find a way to make something of yourself. If that’s what the Air Force offered you, you had to have known I would’ve never stood in your way.”

Her cheeks were rosy and he had no idea if it was from the heat, a sunburn or her anger.

“I know,” he said quietly. And that’s where the pesky
other
half of the truth came into play. He briefly considered telling her everything. It all seemed to be too much to explain. He wasn’t sure she would be able to understand just how much trouble he’d gotten himself into. Not that he’d done anything wrong, for once. He’d simply been in the wrong place at the wrong time. Because of that, he’d had to watch his back every single day. More importantly, he’d had to watch out for her. He’d known immediately that the best way to keep Sarah safe was to keep her far away from him.

He’d never told another soul what had happened that night. He’d never told Sarah because he hadn’t wanted her to be in danger. Instead, he’d used Lacie. He’d done the one thing that he knew would push Sarah away.

As if she was reading his thoughts, she said, “You didn’t have to hurt me like that. Or humiliate me like that.”

“It was just a kiss.” He immediately realized it was the wrong thing to say so he tried to qualify it. “I mean, it didn’t mean anything.”

She sat up a little straighter and narrowed her eyes at him. “Well, I suppose that ought to make me feel better. You broke my heart over a kiss that meant nothing. But Snote thatit wasn’t just a kiss. Her hands—”

“Were everywhere,” he finished with a grimace. “I know.”

“You knew how much she hated me,” Sarah pointed out. He didn’t deny it. “And you had to have known that she would love to tell everyone about how I had walked in on you.”

“I’m sorry. I—”

“Just tell me one thing,” she interrupted.

She was furious now and he knew she had every right to be. She also had the right to get some answers. He gave her a look, letting her know she should ask whatever it was she was going to ask.

“You knew I was coming over. You invited me over.” He cringed because he knew exactly where she was going with this. She leaned over and placed her glass on the table and then crossed her arms over her chest. “Did you want me to catch you with her?”

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “I did.”

What he had never counted on was that she would be running so late. She was never late. He had thought she’d show up shortly after Lacie. He hadn’t counted on having to stall Lacie. When Sarah had finally shown up, with a clear view through the crappy screen door of his trailer house, she’d gotten an eyeful of him and Lacie on the couch.

She’d retained her dignity. She hadn’t walked in screaming, she hadn’t started throwing things. She’d walked right in, placed her hands on her hips and said, “Which one of you wants to tell me what’s going on here?”

Lacie had flashed her a hatefully wicked smile. “Well sugar, if you have to ask what’s going on, then it’s no wonder he had to go looking for someone with more experience.”

Sarah’s eyes had drilled into him then. He hadn’t said a word. He’d been too sick to his stomach to say anything. After he’d gone through with the asinine plan, he’d been horrified with himself. Sarah had left and she hadn’t looked back.

“You didn’t even come after me,” she grated out.

“I know.” He hadn’t gone after her that night. At school, she went out of her way to avoid him. At first, anyway. Later, she’d cornered him on more than one occasion. He couldn’t get away from her fast enough. He knew that if he spent any amount of time with her at all, he’d cave. And he’d gone too far in his plan to let that happen.

“And then when I wanted to talk to you about it, when I wanted you to explain things, you just walked away from me! It was like I didn’t even exist.” He was sure he could see a slight tremble throughout her body now. “At first, I thought nothing could hurt worse than seeing you with her. Then I realized having you act like I was invisible was a hundred times worse.  But neither of those things compared to when you left. You didn’t tell me you were leaving. I just heard one day that you’d left town. I went to see your mom. She said she didn’t know where you’d gone off to. At first, I tried to be okay with it. I thought you’d be back. But month after month went by and no one heard from you.< S yod gone/span> An entire year went by!” She reached over and smacked him across the chest. For a tiny girl, she packed a good wallop. “I was so worried about you!” she cried. “And then? I just gave up. I left for college and I tried damn hard not to look back.”

“Sarah—”

“No! I’m not done! I know this was in the past. But we never dealt with it then. And seeing you again? It brings it all back. It feels like it just happened last week.” Her body was tense and any trace of the companionable girl from earlier was gone. “I trusted you! You should have trusted me! If you’d told me you wanted to go into the military, I would’ve stood behind you. Hell, if you’d told me you wanted to join the damn circus, I’d have supported that too. If you wanted to break up with me, fine. But you should’ve done it the right way. There was no excuse for what you did.”

“I know.” He wasn’t sure what else he should say. Or even what he could say. Because right then, he knew she was in no mood to listen.

“I think I’ve had all of the catching up that I can handle,” Sarah said softly. Her lip began to tremble and just when he thought a tear would slip over, a streak of gray dashed across the room. The small kitten clawed its way up the side of the sofa. She wormed her way into Sarah’s lap and she seemed to relax just a bit.