Fighting Fate (10 page)

The waitress turned slightly and pointed toward the bar. “No. I know. He did. It’s definitely for you.”

Sarah’s eyes locked with Cole’s for just a moment. Then a boisterous crowd of men stepped in, blocking her view. It was just as well. She insistently pushed the drink back toward the waitress. “Please, take it back to him. I don’t want it.”

“I really shouldn’t.” The woman glanced over her shoulder, suddenly looking nervous.

Sarah rummaged around in her purse and pulled out a ten dollar bill. “Here, here’s a tip for you if you take it away. Give it to someone else. Anyone, really. I don’t want it.”

“We will have two strawberry daiquiris though,” Gretchen said.

The woman snatched the bill out of Sarah’s hand. With a reproachful look, she grabbed the drink and walked away.

“
Sarah
…” Gretchen moaned.

Sarah shrugged. “">ShruggedI don’t want anything from him. Not even a drink.”

“But—”

Sarah cut her off. “Maybe you should be worried about your own love life.”

Gretchen rolled her eyes. “Don’t worry about my love life.”

“Why not? Unless you’re keeping something from me, I don’t recall that
you
have a boyfriend.”

She made a confused face. “I don’t. And I don’t want one either. I don’t want to tie myself down with one. I’m too young to be tied down. So big sis, don’t worry about me. My love life is alive and well. Yours? Well, it clearly needs some resuscitation.” She cringed. “Okay, maybe that wasn’t the best choice of words. But really, why not give Cole a chance? He clearly wants one.”

Her eyes drifted to the bar. Her emotions felt like they were on a teeter-totter.  One minute she wanted to see him, the next, she just wanted to run away. She had to admit to herself that she’d hoped he would be here. Now that she knew he was, she didn’t want him to be.

She lifted a hand to rub at her temple. She was going to make herself crazy. And losing her head over Cole yet again just wasn’t a good idea. Even if that fluttery feeling in her heart was telling her it wanted her to. She was grateful to see that he appeared to have left. Or maybe he’d blended in with a group of people. Either way, she didn’t want to be caught looking at him. Again.

She jumped when his voice rumbled beside her.

“I think you should listen to your sister. Why don’t you give me a chance?” he asked, feigning curiosity.

Sarah face-palmed as she groaned. “Why do I feel like I’m being ganged up on?”

“Would you like to join us?” Gretchen asked. Before Cole could answer she said, “Don’t be rude, Sarah. Scoot over.”

With a glare, Sarah scooted.

Cole didn’t hesitate. He slid in next to her. “If you aren’t in the mood for a margarita, can I buy you something else?”

She shook her head. Returning the drink had nothing to do with not liking it. She knew that he was well aware of that.

“Oh,” Gretchen said as she grimaced. “Have I ever got to
pee
!” She grinned at Sarah. “I’ll be right back.”

Sure you will
, Sarah thought as she let out an annoyed huff.

She was trapped between the wall and Cole. She could feel the heat coming off of his body. Worse still, she picked up on the scent of his cologne. Even worse than that—and she knew she was being ridiculous—she could feel the
pull
of him. Like opposing ends of a magnet, she felt herself being drawn to him. She tried to fight it.

She failed.

Her gaze drifted up to his face. He was watching her intently. He was turned in the seat, his body acting as a privacy barrier between them and the rest of the bar. It was still such an odd feeling, seeing him again after all this time. He looked the same and yet…so different. She wondered if he thought the same about her. Her gaze darted across his face, taking in each of his features. The other times she’d seen him she’d still been trying to get over the shock of it all. But now, here he was beside her, the exquisiteness
of him on full display.

“Go out with me,” Cole said as he leaned into her.

His nearness was already making her dizzy. The subtle move caused a rush of old emotions to course through her. She wanted to reach out and run her finger across the hollow of his cheekbone. Or ruffle her hands through his hair. It was just as dark but so much shorter than it used to be. She wondered if it was still as soft. His lips—

“What? No,” Sarah replied as she tamped down her hormones. She tried to edge away but she hit the wall.

“Not on a date. Out for pizza. Or a burger. Something simple. We can talk…catch up,” he suggested.

She turned her gaze away from him and dropped it onto the table. She had to do
something
to block the sight of him. Looking away didn’t do much good. She was still all too aware of him.

Maybe a burger
…

No
, she told herself.
Simply going out for a burger wouldn’t stay simple. Nothing is ever simple with him. And yet…

She felt the heat of his presence melting down her defenses. Would that be so bad?
Would it
? She decided it would. The last thing she needed right now was
complicated
. And saying yes to him had the potential to become complicated.

Besides, she wasn’t ready to date again. Not yet.

Or at least, she didn’t think she was.

The thought had not crossed her mind. Not until this very moment.

“
Coffee
?” he tried. “Just coffee?”

“Cole…” She gave him a little shake of her head. Her heart had taken off in a spastic, panicked beat. She realized this time it wasn’t caused by Cole’s nearness. It was caused by the thought of dating again. 

Hurt flashed across his features. For just a moment, she felt bad. Then she reminded herself that she hadn’t done anything wrong. His gaze flicked away from her. He tensed and she thought maybe he was preparing to leave.

Instead, he took a deep breath before turning around to face her again.

He reached for her hand. Her instinct was to yank it from his grip. She didn’t and the foreign feeling of his large hand around hers suddenly turned into one of familiarity.

“I need to tell you that I’m sorry,” he began “I should have said that, first thing, when I saw you. But I didn’t. So I’m telling you now. I’d like to give you a proper apology. Not just an abbreviated one. Maybe someday I’ll be able to explain things in a way that will make you understand.”

Sarah could feel his gaze on her, almost as though it were a physical thing.

“If I could take back all of the bad stuff, I would. I would in a heartbeat.”

As she listened to him, she instinctively knew he meant what he said. She just wasn’t sure that it was enough.

“Isn’t there something in your life that you regret?” he quietly asked. “Something you wish you could undo? I bet there is. Because anyone who says they have no regrets, they’re either damn lucky, or they’re a damn liar. My bet? They’re a damn liar.”

“Of course I have regrets Cole. Ones you can’t even begin to imagine.” She suddenly felt herself softening toward him. What he’d done, it had been hurtful. But the mistake she’d made? It had been fatal. She certainly couldn’t let herself think about that right now.

She let out a little sigh of exasperation. “What is it that you want to get out of this? I mean, I don’t understand what you want from me. Do you want me to forgive you? Understand you? Be your friend? What?”

He was quiet for a moment, clearly debating how to answer. Finally he said, “I’m just going to lay it all out there. I want you to fall in love with me again, Sarah. I want to pick up where we left off.”

She shook her head slowly. She had been right. He was going for complicated. “I don’t think that’s going to happen. We’re not those people anymore. What we had? It was a long time ago. It was just a teenage crush. And it’s over.”

“Do you really believe that?” he asked. “That what we felt was nothing but a crush? Because I don’t. Not for a second. And if you say you do, I won’t believe you because I know that’s a lie.”

She opened her mouth to protest but he leaned in closer still. Suddenly, she felt like she was sixteen and talking to him for the first time. She couldn’t think of anything to say.

“Come on, Sarah. It was a long time ago. I was young and stupid. You can’t forgive me for that? I don’t blame you for holding a grudge but can we try u w can weto move past it?”

A
grudge
? Did he really think it was that simple? She pulled her hand from his. Suddenly, she had a whole lot to say.

“Did it ever occur to you that it might not have anything to do with holding a grudge? Maybe it has everything to do with the fact that I’m simply not interested.” She threw her head back and squeezed her eyes tightly shut while she emitted a frustrated groan. “
Of
course
that never occurred to you.”

“
Sarah
? Sarah Heath?”

The sound of her name shooting out at her in that shrill voice caused her eyes to fly open again. Cole gave Sarah a questioning look. Then he leaned back out of her way so Sarah could see the woman who had just stopped at their booth.

The woman’s blond hair was curled and primped to perfection. Her makeup was flawless. Her nails were professionally manicured. Her simple white blouse stretched a bit too tightly over her chest to pass as conservative. Her smile, though it was too big to look real, probably was. Sarah hadn’t known her well but she knew enough to know that she was always…
peppy
.

“Annabeth,” Sarah said with a small smile. She struggled to conjure up some enthusiasm. “How are you?”

“I’m
good
!” Annabeth claimed. She used the same amount of enthusiasm that she used to put into leading her cheer squad. “And you? Only…
wait
! It’s not Sarah Heath now is it?” She unscrupulously tried to scope out Sarah’s left hand, undoubtedly wanting to compare the phantom ring to her own sparkly rock. The one she was flaunting.

Sarah curled her hand into a fist and tucked it into her lap. This could not be happening. Not here. Not now. Not with Cole, of all people, right by her side.

“I’ve been living in Connecticut,” Annabeth continued to prattle. “I just came home for a visit with my folks. But last I heard…oh when was that?” she muttered and then shook her head as if that detail didn’t matter. “Last I heard you were getting married.” She cringed and a heavy pause filled the air. Her voice dropped several notches. “Wait…your fiancé
died
, didn’t he? Oh my
goodness
! I remember now! In some horrible crash?”

Her voice had become shrill as she said the last part. Sarah felt the words grating down her spine.

Even though she wasn’t looking at him, it was impossible to miss that Cole’s attention was immediately on her. She felt her body stiffen as the blood rushed from her face.

“Or am I thinking oh nI thinkf someone else?” Annabeth asked with a nervous giggle. She looked from Sarah to Cole and then back again, coming to her own conclusion. “It
was
someone else, right? Because…?” She left her question open-ended as her finger swung in the air between them, as if connecting them with an invisible line. “I’ve been away for
so
long. And there are so many old classmates to keep track of! After a while everyone blends together. But you two!?” She turned to Cole and grinned, looking relieved that she was able to slide together her own mental puzzle pieces, no matter how incorrect they were. “Just
look
at the two of you! You know, you were the
oddest
couple,” she unabashedly admitted. “I can’t
believe
that you two are still together!
Good
for you!”

“Dear Lord,” Gretchen said from beside her. “I think you should stop talking.”

Annabeth frowned as she looked her way.

“Seriously, move along,” Gretchen said. There was no humor in her voice. She darted a concerned look at Sarah.

Annabeth turned back to Cole and Sarah with a questioning look on her face.

Sarah was working hard to keep her expression carefully blank.

Cole was ignoring Annabeth completely. His gaze was set on Sarah.

“Well then,” Annabeth said in a voice that had dropped to a frigid degree. “I guess I’ll go find my husband.”

“You do that,” Gretchen said.

The moment she was gone, Sarah gave Cole a nudge.

“Let me out.”

“Sarah…?”

She refused to look at him. Her eyes were prickling and her breaths were coming a little too quickly. She needed fresh air. She needed to get out of the crowded bar. But mostly, she just needed to get away from Cole and the look of confusion and concern that he wore on his face.

“Just let me out. Let me out right now.”

Her voice was quivering. Even though she was sitting she could tell that her whole body was shaking.

Without further question, Cole complied. He slid out of the booth so that she could get out of her seat. He tried to take hold of her elbow, to guide her out. She yanked herself out of his grip as she stumbled past him.

“I have your daiquiris,” the flustered waitress said.

Gretchen pulled a twenty out of her purse and tossed it on the table. “Keep them,” she said before she rushed out to catch her sister.

*
*
*
*
*

“That didn’t go well,” Cole said as he opened the door to his apartment.

Gretchen pushed past him. He noticed that she was nearly as tall as him. At least she was with those sparkly contraptions she had strapped onto her feet. Her crazy, curly hair flew out around her. Her cheeks were flushed, causing her freckles to stand out. Her dark eyes glittered with emotion.

“Is she okay?” he asked as he followed her.

“As okay as she ever is,” Gretchen said as she made a beeline for his couch. She tossed herself down into the cushions and blew out a frustrated breath. “I took her home. I wanted to stay with her. She made me leave.”

He wanted to say,
Just make yourself at home, why don’t you
. He didn’t dare because he didn’t want to get on the bad side of his ally.