F*cking Awkward (5 page)

I run to the bathroom, turn on the shower, and jump under the icy spray. It gives me a small bit of relief before the pain returns.

“Reed, what’s going on?”

“My dick is on fire.” I grunt, trying to get a handle on the tingles shooting down my thighs.

“Oh my God! It’s swollen and purple!” She steps in front of me and touches it. I hiss and leap back. My knees give out and I sink down, clutching my manhood and praying for relief.

“Mutherfucker!” I scream as scorching, agonizing, bone-chilling pain seeps down my lower body.

“I’m calling 911!” She runs out of the bathroom frantically.

“No! Call Dr. Ross!”

A few minutes pass when the door flies open and Ari comes in, followed by the team doctor and his PA.

“Reed, can you stand?” he asks gently.

I shake my head, not caring how pathetic it looks. He turns off the water and joins me in the oversized shower, bending down and lifting my hands.

I miss the cold water and wince when he pats a towel to dry my lower body.

“You’re quite swollen.”

“No shit.”

“Can someone tell me what happened?”

Ari steps in and bends down, taking one of my hands. She bites her lips nervously, and I notice she’s wearing my shirt from earlier.

“Nothing unusual. Reed came back from the stadium. I was waiting on him. We umm, well, we umm…”

Her face turns bright red as she locks eyes with mine. “We had sex on the sofa. Then this happened.” She blurts it out so fast then hangs her head in embarrassment.

“We had phenomenal sex.” I correct her, trying to break the tension. Doc nudges me with his knee, doing a shit job of hiding his amusement.

“This can’t be happening,” she says quietly.

“How about letting me examine Reed and you go talk to my PA?”

She nods and kisses me on the forehead, then walks out.

Doctor Ross lays a cold compress on me while he inspects the area. “Is there a reason you have specks of teal all over your penis and pubic area?”

What?

“Damn.” I scrub my hand up and down my face. “Ari got a temporary tattoo on her pu—”

“Vagina?” he cuts me off.

“Yeah.”

“I think what I’m seeing is an allergic reaction to the ink.”

“Am I going to be okay? Please, tell me my dick’s not broken.”

He chuckles and hands me an ointment. “It’s not broken. You’ll be fine in a few days. My suggestion is to shave the area and apply this ointment. I’ll leave a few ice packs to get you through the night. Benadryl is safe. But no sex until the swelling recedes and you’re back to normal.”

“What about the game tomorrow.”

“We’ll assess at nine am. It’s really how you feel.”

“Reed, I’m so sorry.” Ari’s voice cracks and I look to see her standing in the doorway with tears in her eyes. “I thought it would be sexy.”

“We’ll let ourselves out,” Dr. Ross tells me in a hushed tone, giving me a look of understanding. He helps me stand then slaps me on the back before leaving.

“Come here.” I reach out to her and she curls into my body, her tears falling on my chest. “It was sexy. Don’t blame yourself. But now I’m gonna need you to help make it better.”

I give her the instructions from Dr. Ross. Once I’m feeling a little more like a human, she gets me to bed and tucks in close.

“Ari, you said this thing is temporary… When will it be gone?”

“Seven to ten days.”

Seven to ten days? No sex for seven to ten days? No way that’s gonna fly. Even in pain, I know I can’t go that long.

She must read my mind because she lifts up, balancing on my chest, and gives me a slow grin. “So I guess blow jobs will have to do until it’s gone.”

“I think I can live with that.”

Suddenly, a wonderful night that turned disastrous now seems a little less tragic.

Oh yeah, I can definitely live with that…

2
½ weeks
later

Ari

I walk into the kitchen looking for Reed and find him leaning against the counter watching a sports recap on the local news. He’s laser focused until I step in front of him and block his view.

“You realize you played that game yesterday, right?”

“Yeah, and we kicked ass. It’ll never get old seeing the highlights when we win.”

“Cocky much?”

“Not cocky if it’s true.” He flashes a wide smile and I melt against his chest, kissing him lightly.

“Where are the kids?”

“Davis has Katy in the playroom watching a movie. Corbin’s asleep.

“We need to talk,” I say, stepping back and hopping onto the counter, pulling him between my legs.

“About?”

“Remember our little debacle a few weeks ago in Chicago?”

“Never will forget it,” he replies roughly.

“Well, I think it’s time you forgave Sophie. She still feels guilty.”

“She should. She talked my wife into a hair-brained idea that resulted in excruciating pain and endless humiliation. I’m still fielding jokes in the locker room.”

“But she didn’t force me to get vatooed.”

“No, but she used her craziness to lure you there. You’d never have done that on your own.”

“True, but we had some of the hottest sex of our lives. I still remember every detail.”

“I do too. But I also remember having to leave the game at half-time and the doctor having to report it as a scrotum injury. Do you know how much shit I’ve taken?”

“It’s too bad, really.” I sigh and tilt my head to the side, giving him my best disappointed look. “Because it may have ended badly, but that night will forever be etched in my brain. Good or bad. Humiliated or not. I’d go as far to say as it’s going into the ‘
top nights of our life’
category.”

He narrows his eyes and looks at me skeptically. “Have you been drinking?”

“Not a drop.” I move his hand to my stomach and watch his eyes grow wide in surprise. “I’m pregnant, again.”

His breath hitches and he lifts his eyes to mine. “Chicago?”

“Yes, it had to be. I took a test and did the dates in my head this morning. It has to be that night.”

He stares at our hands and then steps closer, cupping my face and kissing me gently. “You’re going to give me four.” He refers to his wish before Katy was born to have four children.

“I am, but we’re gonna have a talk after this one is born.”

“I love you, Arianna Williams.”

“I love you too.”

He rests his forehead against mine and sighs in resignation. “I’ll forgive her. But damn if she doesn’t stay out of our sex life from now on.”

“Agreed.” I giggle and grip his hands holding my face. “It’s funny how the most awkward night of our lives may be the most memorable.”

He laughs along with me and pulls me close. “Oh yeah, it’s definitely one we’ll never ever forget.”

A
hren spent
her formative years living in an active volcano. There her family made collectible lava art. She studied rock collecting at the Sorbonne in France. There she met the love of her life-her pet pig Sybil. She returned to the states and started writing. She is happily married to a guy who used to live under a bridge and she met while pole-dancing. They have one amazing daughter.

Now, meet the real me. I grew up in the south and consider myself a true “Southerner”. Most of the special locations mentioned in my books are reflections of my favorite places. Living on the Florida coast, my family spends a lot time at the beach, which is where I usually can be found with a book in my hand.

H
unter Coy

“
M
ace
, seriously, I can’t talk right now,” I said into my phone as I pulled my rental car into a parking spot in front of her apartment.

“Can you come take a look at him? The damn foal is lame as shit, and I can’t decide if the vet is an idiot or if the farrier has lost his mind.”

“Probably both,” I mumbled, leaning into the back seat to grab my duffel bag. “Look, I’m not at home. I’ll drive up next week when I get back to Savannah.”

“Where the hell are you?”

“Ah…” I stalled.

Where the hell was I? I mean, I knew the geographical location. I’d not seven hours earlier paid a shit-ton of money for a last-minute plane ticket. But the whys of this little excursion were a mystery to me.

Not my cock though. No, it knew exactly why I was there.

I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw a light in her apartment on.

“I’m in Chicago,” I confessed.

“What the hell for?”

I shook my head.
Good fucking question.
“I met a girl while I was up here for Emma’s wedding.”

The smile in his voice was unmistakable. “A girl? Singular?”

Grinning, I climbed out of my car. “Yes, singular, jackass. Now, look, she doesn’t know I’m here, so either I’m going to call you back in ten minutes as I search for a place to stay tonight or I’ll come by when I get back, assuming I’m still able to walk.”

He barked a laugh. “Good luck on that one.”

“Yeah, thanks. Tell Lacey I said hey.”

“Will do.” He hung up without so much as a goodbye. Such was Mason Wynn’s style.

Jogging up her steps, I smoothed my shirt down, wishing I’d had time to take a shower before seeing her. But, after the pictures she’d sent me at lunch of her in nothing but an apron from the coffee shop she worked at, I’d feared an all-out revolt from my balls if I’d stopped at a hotel first.

Meh. We can start the party in the shower.

Please, God, let there be a fucking party.

Seconds later, I was pressing my ear to her door, listening for voices while praying that she was alone.
Not creepy at all.

Rolling my shoulders back, I rapped twice and dropped my bag to the ground at my side, hoping I could pull off cool, calm, and sexy when she opened the door.

“Who is it?” she called from the other side of the door.

I hesitated. “Um…me?”

“Is that a question?”

I twisted my lips. “No. Not a question. Sorry. Let me try again.” I cleared the frog from my throat. “It’s me.”

“I’m proud of you for taking charge of your identity in such a decisive manner. But I still have no idea who you are. You sure you have the right apartment, Me?

I smirked. Kara Reed was crazy on basically every level, and I loved it. It was the only reason my mind had allowed my penis to hand my credit card over to the ticketing agent at the airport.

“You can call me Hunter, sugar,” I said suggestively.

“Shut up!”

I laughed. “Open the door, baby.”

“Shut up!” she repeated, but I heard the click of her deadbolt.

Then the other deadbolt.

Then the rattle of a chain.

I silently chastised myself for not having brought a magazine for the wait.

Then the lock on the handle.

Then, finally, the door creaked open and her big, brown eyes peeked through the crack.

“Oh my God,” she breathed, staring at me.

I couldn’t read her reaction through the one-inch opening, so I smiled nervously. “Put me out of my misery here. What kinda prayers you asking God for right now? Thanks or deliverance?”

“You can’t be here!” she exclaimed.

I rocked back on my heels as my heart lurched into my throat. “I…uh…wanted to surprise you.”

“Well, you succeeded. Jesus, Hunter. You can’t surprise a girl who lives alone at eight p.m. on a Sunday night after she’s had the whole weekend off.”

Shit. Shit. Shit. So not the response I was hoping for.
“I… Sorry?”

“I haven’t showered since Friday!” she announced. “Hell, the only reason I’ve even changed my clothes was to send you dirty pics. My apartment is a wreck. And you’ve just interrupted me in the middle of changing the cat’s litter box. So please listen to me when I say: I want to jump you so bad right now.” She dropped her head to the doorjamb. “But you. Can. Not. Be here right now.”

I smiled…huge. “Open the door, Kara.”

“No! I look like hell. And I’m assuming you want to see me naked or you wouldn’t have flown all the way here. And, Hunter, you should know, even though I showered on Friday, there was not a razor involved in that equation.” She lowered her voice to a whisper, “Like, at all!”

I gently pressed on the door and smirked. “What do you know… We’re both in luck. I’ve always had a thing for natural women. Seventies porn is my favorite.”

She groaned. “See? Yet another disappointment. I don’t even have a porn bush.”

I laughed and pushed on the door again until she finally gave up and backed up enough for me to swing it open.

She hadn’t been lying. She looked like utter hell. Her long, brown hair was sitting in a messy bun on the top of her head. And an oversized T-shirt—complete with holes and a ketchup stain—hung over a pair of tattered, blue sleep shorts. At least those were cute and showed off her tan and—slightly hairy—legs.

Yet my smile never wavered. And that had nothing to do with my cock—for once.

“Hey, beautiful,” I crooned, pulling her into a hug.

Kara was short, her head hitting just below my pecs. But her body fit mine like a second skin as she molded against me.

“I can’t believe you’re here.”

I leaned down to kiss the top of her—greasy—hair. “What can I say? I missed you.”

It was the absolute truth. We’d been doing the long-distance thing since we’d met at a wedding two weeks earlier. Despite my desires to sleep with her that first night, a voice I’d never heard had told me to wait. She was a good girl—albeit slightly insane and vegetable obsessed. And it had been a long time since anyone had actually interested me in ways that didn’t involve a bed and a bottle of lube.

“Mmm,” she purred into my chest, wiggling even closer. “You smell terrible too.”

I tipped her head back and took both sides of her face. “I’ve been on a plane all afternoon.”

The corners of her lips turned up into a glowing, white smile that stirred something deep within my chest—and my pants.

It seemed I wasn’t the only one, because before I even had the chance to go in for the kiss, she was mounting me.

Our mouths painfully slammed together as her legs wrapped around my hips, which sent me stumbling back into the half open front door.

“Fuck,” I groaned when it T-boned me directly between my shoulder blades. My grip on her ass faltered as the pain sliced through me. “Son of a…”

She giggled and continued to work my mouth. And, within seconds, the pain ebbed away.

“What do you say we take this to the shower?” I mumbled against her lips.

She shifted her hold, locking her legs at her ankles. “Is it too soon to say I love you?”

I froze and popped my lids open.

Yes. It was entirely too soon to say that.

As she slowly opened her eyes, confusion painted her makeup-free face. “Oh, Jesus, it was a joke. Don’t be a dumbass.”

“It’s just…” I started to apologize. Maybe lay out a few ground rules about where our relationship was headed. I mean, technically, this was only the second time we’d actually seen each other. But, then again, I was about to have as much sex with her as I could over the next twenty-four hours.. And, assuming all went well in the penis-and-vagina meeting, I’d already decided I’d be back the next weekend to do the same. Maybe she was the type of woman who reads into shit like that.

“For fuck’s sake, Hunter. I’m not in love with you. I’m about to shave my pubes while you scrub your balls beside me. I believe we both know exactly where tonight is going. So let’s just calm down, get clean, and then get to fucking.”

Oh. My. God. Sweet Baby Jesus sent me an angel.

And that was the exact moment
I
fell in love.

Without another conscious thought, I scooped her off her feet and headed down the hall like a man on a mission. After kicking the door open, I darted through her bedroom and into the bathroom.

We were all hands and mouths as we stripped each other naked. With my lips connected to hers, I blindly turned the shower on, and then we both climbed inside.

“Goddamn!” I yelled when the water fresh off a polar ice cap hit my back. Instinctively, I jumped but in the process, I accidently shoved her under the spray.

“Hunter!” she shrieked, scrambling from the shower.

However, in our haste, we’d failed to take any of the standard shower-sex safety precautions, like, say…not spilling half a bottle shampoo on to the bathroom floor.

As though we’d been cast in
Final Destination Four Million and Twelve
, she slipped in slow motion and cracked her head on the counter.

Every episode of
Rescue 911
I’d watched as a child flashed into my head as I dove after her.

“Kara!” I yelled, grabbing her shoulders and rolling her to her back.

Kneeling beside her head, I assessed her for an injury.

Her hands were frantically moving over her face, but she’d yet to say anything besides a few grumbled curses.

“Shit, sugar. Are you okay?” I asked as a small cut on her forehead started to drip blood.

She huffed. “It’s like I’m destined to be a virgin for the rest of my life.”

My entire body froze. It shouldn’t have been the matter at hand, but for some reason, the question sprang from my mouth damn near immediately.

“You’re a virgin?” I asked, palpable fear packed into every syllable.

She flashed opened her eyes. “No. That was another joke. You know, for such a funny guy, you seriously lack the ability to follow sarcasm.”

“Well, excuse me, little Miss Comedy. I like you. You’ll have to forgive my nerves about deflowering you.” I was bending over her to grab a piece of toilet paper off the roll to clean her forehead when my erection poked her in the cheek.

“I guess that’s one way to ask for a blow job,” she teased as I sat back up.

I quickly moved my cock out of her face. “Shit. Sorry.”

“Christ, your cock is huge!” she gasped, shifting to the side to get a better view.

I smiled proudly, rocking back onto my heels and then passing her the toilet paper for her head. “Don’t worry. It’ll fit.” I winked arrogantly.

She arched an eyebrow and attempted to stifle a laugh. “They always do.”

“They?” I questioned before tipping my head. “You know what? Let’s go back to you being a virgin. That was more fun.”

She slowly sat up and used my shoulders to pull herself to her feet. “Fun for who? I’m not losing my virginity to a parsnip that size.”

“Parsnip? Really?”

She smirked teasingly.

A
fter getting
a glimpse of the amount of hair that would soon be clogging the drain, I suggested solo showers. She insisted I go first, and when I emerged from the bathroom, I found that she’d done a quickie tidy on her apartment. The clothes that once had littered the floor were now in the hamper, and a few vanilla-scented candles had been lit. If I was being honest, even when it was messy, her apartment was still a hell of a lot cleaner than mine.

I was lounging on the bed, petting her orange-and-white cat, when she finally emerged from the bathroom.

Completely.

Fucking.

Nude.

I blinked entirely too many times as though the erotic oasis were going to disappear.

“You’re wearing clothes,” she said, sauntering toward me.

I sat up and swung my legs over the side of the bed. “You’re not.”

She shook her head and stopped in front of me. In this position, her breasts were at the same level as my mouth. It was that moment that I realized short men had all the luck.

Using her hips, I guided her between my legs. Her breasts swayed as they taunted me.
So fucking close.

Tipping my head back, I caught her gaze. “So, you seem like a pretty straightforward girl.”

“Mmm,” she hummed, climbing into my lap.

I glanced back down at her tits. “Good. Because I want to be straight with you. Foreplay with someone new is always stressful and never any good. I’d fumble around, trying to figure out what the hell you like. And then you’d have to fake at least three orgasms only to hopefully achieve one. So I’d like to propose that we skip all of that for now.”

She smiled and purposely brushed her nipple across my lips. “I don’t know. It could be fun to watch you fumble around.”

I latched on to her breast, sucking hard as I ground her against my erection. “Trust me, it’s more fun to make you come on my cock. Then we can try all the awkward foreplay in round two.”

As she circled her hips, I groaned.

“I see your point,” she said. “We should definitely introduce our bodies first. No point in a play date if they don’t even like each other.”