Family Ties (19 page)

“I think they provide some kind of emotional release for you. We can’t know what it’s for until we get some idea of what triggered it.”

“Why would I need an emotional release? My childhood was pretty normal.” Thinking back, it had been ‘
Leave it to Beaver
’ normal, except for his mother’s over-protectiveness.

“Can you remember when they started?”

He considered for a minute then shook his head. “No.”

“Okay.” She nodded. “Let’s see if we can narrow it down.” She looked off for a minute then back at him. “Have you been having them for five years?”

“No.”

“Two?”

“No.”

“A year?”

“No, not that long. Only the last few months.”

“Okay, good. We’ve narrowed it down to the past few months.” She was obviously considering dates.

“Did you have them in the spring?”

Gray thought back, trying to remember what he’d been doing in the spring. He’d finished the work on an office in the downtown core in March. He’d worked some long hours renovating a loft office – usually falling into bed exhausted. And slept through ‘til morning.

As soon as that one finished he’d started on this job. Mr. Miller had heard some good recommendations and wanted him to start as soon as possible. April had been too wet and miserable to be changing the windows, but he’d managed to find a few dry days. He’d worked on finishing the half bath on his own place at the same time. He remembered different tasks and work, then shook his head. “I don’t think they started before the beginning of May.”

“Did anything special happen around then? Contact with an old friend? A relative or something?”

He shook his head. “No, nothing like that. I don’t have any family beyond my parents.”

“What about work? Any accidents or injuries?”

He shook his head. They weren’t making any progress with these questions.

“To somebody else?”

“Nah, I usually work alone, so there’s little chance of an injury. And there haven’t been any that qualify as an ‘injury’ for a couple of years.”

“Your friends? At home?”

Again he felt like they were wasting of time. But since he’d agreed.... “Nothing.” He thought back and then realized something. “There was one change.”

“What?” she asked turning to him.

“About that time a new family moved in next door, and I can’t keep my hands off the mother.” He pulled her against him, kissing her, then teasing the cord in her neck. “I think we’ve chatted enough about my dreams, don’t you?” He flicked his tongue over her ear lobe. “I have another problem I’d like you to help me with.”

Her chuckle went straight to his heart. How could a guy get so lucky? He’d found a woman who seemed to want him as much as he wanted her. More than he’d wanted any other woman. Ever.

***

“I’m going to work on the fence around the pool again, big guy. Do you want to help?”

Focusing on his bowl of cereal, Jamie silently ate his breakfast, then looked up at her, a question in his eyes.

“I’m doing laundry and chores today.” She patted his back as she went to get the coffee. “I’ll be busy, so I’m not leaving the house.” She lifted the pot and brought it to the table. “If you want to help Gray, it’s okay with me. It will give you something to do since the other kids are at Dina’s until tomorrow.”

He looked from her to Gray then back at her again. After a moment he nodded. Chewing his lip, but nodded.

“Great. I can sure use the help. There’s a few more posts to cement in place, and then I really need some help with the chalk line.”

Jamie sat up straighter and looked at Gray.

“Have you even seen a chalk line?”

The boy shook his head.

Andie watched the two of them as Gray explained about the line and how they’d use it to level the base-board of the fence. The words didn’t really matter, since the enthusiasm in Jamie’s eyes made her happy. He was finally showing interest in something in the real world – something he could do with an adult other than her.

After the two of them walked to Gray’s yard, Andie hopped into the shower. The hot spray eased muscles she hadn’t known were tight. She groaned, sore in places that hadn’t seen activity in years.

The smell of her herbal shampoo seemed particularly pleasant this morning. And the drop of raspberry scented body wash on her loofah reminded her of the tart, sweet taste of Gray. Standing under the spray, her nerves tingled and came alive.

She shut off the water and dried her face, then wrapped the towel around her hair. Woman, you’ve got it bad. Taking another towel, she patted her skin dry then stepped to the mat, wrapping the towel around her. She peered into the mirror, searching for any signs of change.

There weren’t any.

Unless you counted the glow in her face. Or the delight in her eyes. Or the hum coursing through her body. She was well and truly in love.

How had it happened? After Dave’s death, she’d been empty inside. Beyond grief. She’d felt like she existed beyond emotion back then. So what had Gray done?

Smoothing cream over her arms and shoulders, she began to itemize them. He’d shown her a strong man. One who had firm beliefs and values and didn’t mind standing up for them. He’d protected her family then shown her a softer, gentler side of himself. He’d been willing to talk to her about his feelings and his dreams. He’d let her in, in ways Dave never had.

“Goodbye, my first love,” she said softly to the man she’d been carrying in her heart. “I always felt guilty I didn’t, no I couldn’t, grieve the way you deserved. I felt you’d totally and completely abandoned me and left me so very alone. But knowing Gray, I understand.”

She thought of her late husband, his take charge attitude. His drive. His need to succeed. “Go in peace. I loved you with everything available to a girl and I grieved over a girl’s lost opportunities. Now I’ve found a love for the woman I am.”

“Be as happy as I am.”

She closed her eyes and sent all the pain and fear on their way. She’d been a good wife and a caring widow. However, in the intervening years, she’d discovered the power of being a woman – power she could now revel in. Power she couldn’t have handled before now. Power it would take a strong man to appreciate.

***

Andie was never amazed at the mess a house full of people could create. She’d been a foster mom long enough to see disorder as natural if the kids were comfortable and having fun. If they felt safe enough to leave things around.

That’s why she stopped short at the door to Jamie’s room. For the first time ever, he’d dropped his shorts on the floor by his bed. His slippers had been kicked to opposite sides of the room and his closet doors were wide open. Looks like her little general was finally beginning to relax. Thank God.

Through the open windows, she could hear the pounding of a hammer. The scream of a saw. Then silence.

She chuckled at herself as she tip toed to the window to check on Gray and Jamie. They couldn’t hear her coming from his backyard, regardless of the noise she made.

When she pushed aside the drape, she saw Jamie squatted beside the pole on the far corner of the pool. His whole body rigid, he stared at a spot near the bottom of the post.

“Got it?” Gray asked.

Jamie nodded.

“Okay. Hold it tight.” Gray seemed to pluck something from the air. “There, all done.”

Jamie rose, holding out his hand.

“You did a good job holding the line for me, Jamie.” Gray walked toward the boy, spinning a small handle on a gray box. She watched Jamie brush his hands off then wipe them on the back of his shorts.

The chalk line.

Gray hunkered down and put his hand on the boy’s back. From their position, he seemed to be explaining something. Jamie smiled, then carefully picked his way around the pool and lifted up a hammer and some scraps of wood. It looked like he was going to build something.

That gave her an idea. Maybe it was time she started to create something on her own. Take charge of her life as so many motivational speakers said.

Humming a happy song, she changed the sheets on her bed. Gray was busy. She hoped he’d save some energy for tonight. He had a big surprise coming.

She smoothed the satin sheet into place. A very big surprise – one that would have to wait until Jamie was sound asleep in bed.

The guys worked outside for most of the day. The poles were cemented into place, the bottom and top cross boards were nailed into place and they had a few of the slats nailed upright when she called them to get ready for dinner.

Gray walked Jamie home then left again, wanting to shower and change at his place. Probably a good thing, she admitted to herself. It would be hard to behave herself if she knew he was down the hall, in her shower, wet and naked. Especially if she thought about the surprise waiting for him.

Whistling as he loped up the back steps, he crossed the threshold into the kitchen, then took a deep breath. “Something smells awfully good in here.”

Andie was separating barbecued ribs. “Help yourself. I thought we’d be casual and eat outside.” She waved a hand at the plates and cutlery on the table. “Juice, tea and water are in the fridge.” She smiled over her shoulder. “I think you might even find a beer or two.”

“Now you’re talking.” Gray opened the door and looked around, finally spotting the cold cans at the back of the lowest shelf.

He rose, popping the top, then shut the door.

“No.”

Attacked by a whirlwind, Gray lifted his beer out of Jamie’s reach.

“No. Bad. Bad. Bad.” His fists were pummeling Gray’s thighs and hips and tears were streaming down his cheeks.

Andie watched him for a moment or two, wanting to see where his reaction was going. He was talking and emotionally reacting to something. Unsure what caused it all until Jamie jumped and slapped the can out of Gray’s hand.

“No.” He wrapped his arms around Gray’s thighs. “Bad.”

Clearly stunned, Gray stood for a moment, letting the boy hold on to him. After a second that felt like hours, he loosely clasped his hands around Jamie’s neck, letting them rest on his back. When the boy quit shaking, Gray squatted down to his eye level.

“You don’t want me drinking a beer.”

Jamie shook his head. “No beer. Bad.”

“You only had to ask, Bud. I don’t mind drinking tea.”

Jamie looked like somebody had doused him with cold water. “Oh.” He threw his arms around Gray and held him tight. “I ‘member Mama drank it and then got sick.”

Gray hugged him back, pulling the little body against his chest. “You’re quite the kid, you know? First you work hard all day and then keep me safe from beer.” He leaned back and reached into his pocket. “Would you like a mint?”

Jamie nodded as he reached for the treat.

“What do polite people say?” Gray asked.

They stared at each other for a moment, then in his rusty voice, Jamie said “Please.” And opened his palm.

“Who could resist such a polite boy?” Gray handed him the candy and watched as he unwrapped it and popped it into his mouth. “I think we’d better get this mess cleaned up, bud, before Andie shoos us both out of her kitchen.” He ruffled the boy’s hair. “I don’t know about you, but I’m hungry enough to eat a horse.”

“Yeah.” His thousand watt smile said it all.

***

Gray stretched out on the couch, flipping through television channels as he waited for Andie to settle the little guy into bed. The kid did NOT like him drinking beer - he’d made those feelings clear.

Who’d have thought it would take something he didn’t want to start him talking? Common sense suggested wanting something would be more important than not wanting something else. Apparently not.

He hadn’t talked a blue streak, although he’d said a few words through dinner. Andie had asked him to choose his food and insisted he name the things he wanted. She also got him to ask for things at the table, rather than reaching.

All in all it had been a productive day.

He’d made great headway getting the pool enclosed, even with Jamie’s help. He’d had a good meal and hoping for a repeat of last night, he anticipated more of the best sex he’d ever enjoyed.

For some reason, he’d come in ways he hadn’t reached before. It wasn’t technique, although she had lots of skills. And it wasn’t only her great body and smooth sweetness, though they made the sex better. It was something he hadn’t experienced before. A closeness. Or a coming together.

Surprised at the direction his thoughts were taking and unwilling to explore his reactions more deeply, he let his mind drift.

He’d spent a fair amount of time during the day wondering why he’d told her about his dreams, since it was totally unlike him. He always kept his life to himself, starting as a kid with Ma and Pops. For some reason he’d never learned to share his thoughts and feelings. They might have tried to teach him, but he doubted it – Ma was as reticent about wearing her heart on her sleeve as anybody.