Falter (25 page)

“How do you do it? Put up with the normalcy of life knowing what you know?” I could barely accomplish daily functions, let alone run a café and pretend to be normal.

“Nevaeh, I’ve had ten years to learn to deal with living two lives. You’ve had less than twenty-four hours. If I
didn’t
have a piece of what a normal life is meant to be, I would be so overwhelmed by the angel-demon stuff that I’d forget what I was fighting for.” He leaned over and pressed his soft lips to my forehead. “Come on. Time to put on a happy face.”
 

His mouth arched into an over-exaggerated, teeth-showing grin. The silliness of his expression forced me to giggle, and I followed suit with my own cheesy grin.

I couldn’t leave the pictures of George and the demon behind though. Thoughts of Malach and his white billowy wings drifted in and out of my thoughts. And Gavyn—I’d never look at him the same. He was my safe-hold in all of this. He was the only one I could trust. Yet, something twisted in my gut, something that told me to be careful.
 

Was there anyone I could really trust anymore?

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Friend or Foe?

Thankfully, the morning hustle and bustle started early at Joe’s. The restaurant’s chaos eased the constant shuffling in my mind and kept me from breaking down about George every waking second.
 

The majority of the staff asked how George was within fifteen minutes of Gavyn and me coming downstairs.
 

Mental note: Layla could spread news quicker than lightning.
 

I’m
so
sure she did it out of the goodness of her heart too.

Gavyn had assigned me to do prep with him in the kitchen for most of the day. It was soothing to look up and know he was there. That, maybe, we were sharing the same thoughts when we caught a glimpse of each other. Then, at other times, I found him staring at me from across the island and experienced a gentle flush of tranquility wander through my body. In those moments, I felt like my problems had washed away. My psyche was clear and serene. I knew it was Gavyn swaying me when affectionate, satisfied smiles spread across his kissable lips.

Layla and I traded glares through the pass-through window now and again. She didn’t say anything, but the “Don’t mess with me, bitch” look she gave me said enough.
 

The more I thought about her, the more something she said picked at me. “They want him really bad…if I get him to join us…I can have him as my partner.”
Could she know? Wouldn’t Gavyn know if she was one of the Celatum?
I reminded myself to ask him about her possible involvement in this whole thing later.

Lunchtime zoomed by, and then the café slowed to a snail’s pace. This allowed my brain excessive time to zone in on the painful things I was attempting so hard to escape. With less need of me in the kitchen, I decided to keep occupied bussing the few tables recently emptied in the cafe.
 

The sun had shifted to the rear of the building during the rush hours. The low glow of pendent lights and a kaleidoscope of colors, dancing across the floor through the warped glassy panes like a prism, painted the room.

I stopped at a table next to one of the tall, aged windows and admired the breathtaking rainbows seeping in. Beyond the ripples, I saw him studying me. The wavy glass distorted his features, but I knew it was Archard. No one had eyes that beautiful. No one stirred those uncharted places in me like he did.
 

Anger churned deep in my belly, even as he drew me in.
 

What did he tell George that had him convinced everything would be okay, and why wasn’t it okay
?
 

He had to know answers or, at least, where I could find them.
 

The urge to tell him off took over, and I bolted out of the café. The heavy door slammed behind me with a bang that echoed through the crowded street. I jogged to where I saw him standing, but he was gone. I placed my hands on my hips, biting the inside of my cheek while I impatiently searched for Archard in the hordes of people moving down both ends of the street.

I had every curse word in the book ready to blast at him, as well as those I’d made up. For some reason, I felt like he could connect so many pieces of the puzzle. He knew things—I was sure of it. And, though the magnetism I held towards him was uninvited, I had to know why it was there. Not because I wanted to, but because it would be devastating to my very core if I didn’t find out what it meant.
 

I inspected the faces racing by me, but none of them were Archard. My heart throbbed from the constant distance that seemed to always come between us. I was mad as hell, yet the thought of never getting close to him made me crazy.
 

As the overwhelming and unexplainable pain of his elusiveness weighed me down, I turned to walk back to the café. It would only be a matter of minutes before I fell to the ground and started weeping like a baby. I refused to let that happen.

“Looking for me?” His voice was deep and barely above a whisper next to my ear. His chest pressed firmly against my back.

I gasped, partly because he surprised me and partly because I buzzed with electricity when he was this close. “As a matter of fact, I was,” I breathed, spinning around to face him. In my head, I ripped through all the awful things I wanted to say. I was surprisingly disappointed when I found myself unable to tell him what I really thought. With every passing second, my will wavered. I wanted him to hurt like I hurt, but the strange need to love him was stronger. The need for him to hold me—to comfort me—became too much.
 

Only one word came to mind now. “Why?” I whispered. A tear trickled down my cheek.

“Why what?” he asked with a calm, unknowing expression. His endless eyes burned into mine, full of the knowledge he was hiding behind that impenetrable demeanor.

I knew he saw the pain on my face. I knew he understood what I was asking. How could he stand there so composed without even the tiniest offer of solace?

“
Why what?
That’s it? —
Why what?”
I scoffed. Flashes of anger crackled inside me. “I know you had something to do with George’s death, I just don’t know what. I deserve some answers—no, I demand them! He was fine before you left and then…” I stopped myself, afraid that if I continued I wouldn’t hold back any of the gory details. The sidewalk, with dozens of people around, was not the place for that.

His cool, solid manner became visibly rattled. “You have no idea what you are talking about. You have no understanding of these matters, so don’t get so judgmental, little girl,” he growled, leaning down an inch from my face.

“I’m not a little girl,” I yelled at him, puffing my ample chest out to prove my point, “and how do you know what I—“
 

My ranting came to a halt when a feather floated out from under his long, black duster. My wide eyes trailed the white softness as it glided along the crisp breeze between us. I looked back at Archard. He stared at me intently, his brows pinched together and jaw twitching, gauging my reaction.
 

A few of the puzzle pieces clicked into place. I rewound to the day before and remembered the fuzzy down stuck to the window. His bronze skin shimmered in the slightest way as he swiped at the feather. The picture of golden, glistening residue on the glass reappeared in my thoughts.
 

“You’re…you’re one of them.” A gratified smirk tugged at the corners of my mouth.
He
had left the eerie evidence. He was an angel.
 

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” The anger behind his words and the aggravation in his manner definitely implied that I’d struck a nerve. I couldn’t figure out if it was my accusation that upset him, or that I discovered some sort of truth about him. Really, it didn’t matter to me. All that mattered was that I had an answer, something to grasp in the whirlwind of my ever-changing reality.

Before I could respond, he was gone, the black duster flapping behind him as he turned a corner into the alley beside Joe’s.
 

I took a deep, contented breath and returned to the café.

I had a hunch he would come back around.
 

He may not have confirmed it, but for now, I was totally okay with thinking he was an angel. Maybe that would also explain the attraction. It felt different from Malach’s pull, but I was willing to believe that they all had different intensities like the Celatum—for the time being.

“Hey. Where did you go?” Gavyn met me at the door, holding it open as I stepped inside. The instant I saw his face, a twinge of guilt soured my happiness. Feelings for Gavyn were flourishing in my heart, but there was something in my soul that reached out for Archard against my will—and the lines were beginning to blur.

“Uh…I went outside for a minute. Thought I saw someone I knew.”

“Uh huh,” he responded doubtfully. “Layla said you were looking for me.”
 

“What? No.” Grinding my teeth, I bit back the irritation boiling in my blood. I didn’t know what game she was playing, but I could see her attempts to beat me every chance she got. “Speaking of Layla, I have a few things I want to talk to you about.”

“Alright. We can add it to the list of things I already planned on telling you later.” His eyes probed mine like I was a book of secrets for him to read.

I bent to pick up the tray of dirty dishes I had left on the table beside us. “What time did you want to go up?”

He looked around the café, assessing how busy it was. “I can get Johnny to close up tonight. So, I guess…eight-ish. Is that okay?”

“Yeah. I just wanted to let some of our old friends know that George is gone.” Tears stung my eyes as his name rolled off my tongue. “He had a few buddies in the old abandoned warehouse we used to hide in.”

“Okay…please be careful.” Gavyn’s warm hands cupped both sides of my face and gently pulled me closer. Butterflies tickled my belly as he softly kissed my lips. “I don’t like you goin’ by yourself, but I can’t go with you right now.”

I shook my head, waving my hand through the air in dismissal. “I’ll be fine. Besides, I need to get out of here and spend some time by myself.” A reassuring smile convinced him not to push the subject any further.

Gavyn smiled and nodded then walked back towards the server’s window. A figure moved in the hallway to the right of him, catching my attention. Layla emerged from a shaded area of the corridor, crossing her arms over her chest and winking at me before she slinked back into the shadow and disappeared from view.
 

Oh, the bitch was definitely up to something, with all her stalking and skulking around, but I wouldn’t let that ruin my life. Besides, what was the worst she could do? Pull my hair and smack me? I knew how to defend myself against that.

It was around six when I finally left Joe’s. The streets were almost clear of the rush hour traffic, and the moon was drowning out the fading sun. Bright streetlights flickered on in unison, lighting my path down the sidewalk beneath them. I loved the beauty of the night. Sparkling stars and the blue radiance of a lazy moon always seemed to lull my emotions.

I roamed slowly through the gloomy side streets, finding my way back to an old warehouse. Orange flames flickered out of steel barrels and small fire pits, lighting my pathway between the tall city structures. I passed by the clusters of homeless people gathered around the fires with my head down and my hands shoved in my pockets, avoiding any chance of drawing attention to myself.

Memories of my old life returned, bringing tears to the corners of my eyes. Memories of George reading me stories and teaching me while
we
warmed by those fires surfaced. Memories of cold winters and hot summers spent searching for food and jobs. We were happy together, even if we struggled for the necessities.
 

There was a sense of remorse eating at my heart for these people. I felt guilty because I was able to leave this life, and for whatever reason these people were stuck. Tonight, I would eat a warm meal and lay in a warm bed while they suffered.

Most of all, I felt guilty for George’s death. Maybe if he hadn’t found me under the dock, he wouldn’t have been destined to die such an early and awful death. Surely, the demon wouldn’t have taken his soul.