Fallocaust (The Fallocaust Series) (63 page)

I steadied myself with one hand, my other one started lightly scratching his chest. I was straddling him now. Only a small margin of space separating his hands from my stiff member. He was still rubbing and griping my backside, the both of us kissing more deeply and sexually than we ever had before.

My heart must be going crazy for him, I wondered it that was encouraging him to keep going. He knew how much I loved him, and wanted him.

My dick throbbed, I wanted him to touch it, he was so close. If I leaned into him more I could rub it against his groin.

I ran my finger nails down his stomach, until I got to the bandage. As I rubbed my tongue against his, I un-did his jean’s button, and pulled down his fly. I sucked on his tongue and slipped my hands down his pants.

I groaned as I felt him for the first time, he was stiff and rigid too; excitement ran through me like electricity. We were going to have sex, I knew it. I felt the excitement flicker with fear and anticipation. I started to rub the hard mass and as I felt its shape I pulled it out and glanced down as Reaver sucked on my lip.

It was thick and long with a defined, perfectly shaped head; slightly pink with the blood rushing under its thin skin. Behind it dark pubes that ran into a treasure trail up to his stomach.

I ran my hand over it and started to play with it.

Reaver groaned and tried to kiss me again. I let him, but I kept watching it. I wanted his whole pants off, I wanted to see all of him. My god I wanted him badly.

“Take them off,” I whispered, before kissing him again. I lightly tugged on the head of his dick. It was the only part of him that was warm to the touch.

“Mmm, patience,” he purred. I felt his hot breath against my ear. His hands moved from my backside to my upper legs, only inches away from my dick. I flushed as he ran his hands back and forth between my thighs. He was teasing me like crazy.

I pressed my lips hard against his, and in response to that he pulled my pants down. I pushed my hips down onto his groin. I could feel his warm, hard member against mine. He moaned quietly. I pressed them together and took a shaky breath.

I could see Reaver looking down at my dick, it was his first time seeing it. He reached down and as he did I lifted my self up and pushed my hips forward so he could see it better. He traced his hands over it and started running his pointer and middle finger over the top. I immediately relaxed  under his touch, it felt good.

My dick wasn’t nearly as big as his, but it was thick like his at least. I hoped he liked what he saw.

I realized I was worrying about what he thought more than I was enjoying his touch. I looked down as he put his hand completely over it, pulling my foreskin back, before he started stroking it in rhythm.

I almost had to back away from him as the pleasure overwhelmed me, I was afraid I would cum with just a few strokes. I didn’t though, but with his hard dick still laying between my legs it wouldn’t take long.

And it didn’t, it was only a minute or so before I leaned down on him again. He stopped and put his hand further back and started gently massaging my balls. I wondered if he knew I was close just from my heartbeat. I took his lips into mine again, both of us breathing heavy.

A shiver went through me as he moved his hands further back towards my hole. I spread my legs further apart to give him some room. I close my eyes and took in a sharp breath as he started rubbing his finger against the tight opening.

I watched him wet his finger for a moment before it went back down to my hole, he started rubbing it more, putting just a slight amount of pressure on the tip of his finger so it almost broke through. It felt good, I wanted more.

“Push it in,” I gasped. I lifted my leg up and put my knee partially on the back rest of the couch.

I cried out as he pushed his index finger in. I shifted around until he had enough room to slip the rest of the digit in. I closed my eyes and let out a high pitch moan.

As he started moving his finger inside and out I felt my dick harden even more, to the point where it burned and begged for release. I never realized it could feel this good. I had fingered myself before but this didn’t compare at all. He was hitting spots I didn’t even know existed. It hurt, but the pain felt good and soon enough all the pain faded.

What would his dick feel like? The thought filled me with anticipation and more nervousness.

Reaver pushed himself up to his knuckle, I could feel his finger curl to hit my prostate.

“Oh Reaver.” I clenched my teeth, I leaned down so my forehead was resting against his shoulder. His finger still thrusting in and out of me. I wanted to touch myself so badly, but I wouldn’t, I couldn’t.

“Put another one in,” I begged, but he kept pushing it in me. I squeezing his shoulder. He wasn’t answering me, it was driving me crazy. I lifted my forehead up and kissed him.

I glanced up at him, and was upset to see his eyes looked troubled.

I put my hand on his hand underneath me, and stopped him. “What’s wrong?”

Reaver’s black eyes jutted to mine, he looked surprised that I had noticed.

“Nothing, dummy,” he kissed me, he started fingering me again.

I pressed back but then pulled away. Reaver slipped his finger out and moved away from me. His mouth twitched, and I didn’t like how his eyes looked.

“You were never... eager like this before... him.”

And that’s about where my heart broke in half.

I recoiled back, and as I did he tried to stop me but I jerked away from him. I could feel ever bit of sexual tension between me and him die. Like someone had just tossed a bucket of cold water on us.

“No...  no, shit... ah, god dammit!” Reaver swore as I got up off of him, I felt my face flush. I pulled my pants up and started walking away from him. A rock got dropped into my stomach, I felt nauseous, and humiliated.

Was he right?

Fuck... I had even had him fingering me... like I had... him.

I walked to the tank hatch and tried to open it, but of course it was locked and the key was by the living room. I gave it a few pathetic pulls and as I let go of it. I saw Reaver’s hand try and grasp mine.

“Come back here, I’m not finished with you yet.” Reaver was giving me a small smile. He felt bad. He didn’t have a censor to stop him from saying inappropriate things, even at horrible times. Now he was trying to brush it off... for my sake. He was being nice to me...

Was he right?

My mind found Perish’s face. His deranged innocence, his devotion, his thirst to be loved and touched, his appreciation... his well... sexual desires.

Had he awoken those feelings in me? He had touched me, fondled, grinded me. I had stuck my fingers inside of him and fucked him like Reaver had just done me. I had felt excited when he reacted, when he moaned and when he came. The first thing I had wanted Reaver to do to me was what I had done to him. Feel what it was like, experience what he had experienced when I did it to him. The thrill of being touched, being stimulated by someone you loved.

He had loved me, I saw it in his eyes. Love and just relief... relief that someone loved you. Someone cared. Like I had felt when Reaver first pulled me out of that pod.

Perish had felt for me, what I had felt for Reaver. Sullen relief that someone in the world cared about you.

And I had cut his head off.

After giving up on the tank hatch, I walked into his bedroom. I didn’t know where else to go so I well... walked into his closet and closed the door. I held it shut, feeling my eyes start to brim. I felt stupid, but I literally had no where else to hide.

“I’m sorry,” a very sad Reaver said from the other side of the door. “You should know by now I say really stupid shit at really awful times.”

I tried to hold it back but I burst into tears.

“Can I come in?” Reaver knocked on the closet door.

“No!” I cried into my cloth pants. I could feel jackets above me and gun cases behind me. I was glad there was enough to room to crouch down at least.

Reaver let out a breath, I heard the door move, I think he was leaning up against it.

“I’m sorry he touched you,” he said quietly, “and that he made you touch him.”

I felt a spark of anger smoulder in me as he said that. “You should be sorry for thinking I enjoyed it.”

There was another pause. I sniffed and kept wiping my eyes as they welled up.

“I... can see why you would think that’s what made me say that...”

“No shit, Reaver.” A flare of anger buried its self into my heart. “I don’t tend to get flattered when my boyfriend asks if I want to have sex with him because I was molested by the guy keeping us captive.”

More god damn silence. I felt around until my hands brushed up against some clothing. I thought it was a shirt. I blew my nose on it, I didn’t care if he got mad at me after.

“Look I don’t know how to explain it without fucking it up... so I’ll just tell you something.” Reaver paused, but the continued. “Reno got raped a few years before you came here.”

I looked towards him, even though it was dark and he couldn’t see me. Out of all the things I expected him to say, this wasn’t one of them. What did Reno have to do with any of this?

“By Bridley, the loser I let the ravers eat. He was five years older than Reno, a lot stronger than his wussy name suggests... I... well, he was a wreck. Goofy, idiotic Reno was just fucking lost.”

I didn’t know why he was telling me this now,  but I listened. Feeling horrible for poor Reno. “Reno was this happy go lucky guy, and when Bridley raped him he just died inside. Even after I killed him he was... different. Did a fuck ton of drugs, and he started trying to have sex with me, a lot.”
“Did you?”

Another break of silence before Reaver answered, his voice was low and I could tell he was uncomfortable. “Bridley made Reno suck his cock. He kept pushing me to let him suck mine. Like he had to do it to get rid of the feeling of being violated.” Another pause.

“I let him and the stints continued for awhile, but after I felt like I was leading him on. I didn’t like him that way, he was just my bud. I didn’t like anyone.”

I felt a bit queasy at that, but oddly relieved. I had fully believed they had been sleeping together all this time.

But why was he telling me this?

“I’m not all psychology like you but... you suddenly... today being all over me. Damn, I... I loved it but...” Reaver paused, then he just blurted it out. “You weren’t raped but he did... you know, do shit with you and we just got back... so I was worried...” He muttered a few curses. “Worried you were wanting it for the wrong reasons, or following the wrong feelings. Stop making this so fucking hard for me, okay? I just didn’t want our first time to be a fucking therapy session.”

The more I thought about it though, the more I think he was right. What Perish had done to me had been thrown in the whirlpool of emotions I had been sorting through about our experience with him. Perhaps they were coming out like this... I mean we had just woken up. Had it fucked me in the head?

“I’m sorry.” Now it was my turn to say it.

“Come outside.”

I got up and opened the closet door. Reaver was waiting a few steps away. Half in darkness, and half in light. The part of his face I could see looked remorseful. He opened his arms and I walked into them and let him hug me.

To my surprise after he kissed me again, deeply. As I opened my lips for him his tongue slipped in. I felt a twinge between my legs.

“You just fingered him?”

I nodded, I started sucking on his tongue. He shifted his warm lips down and bit my bottom lip, before his hands move to his own sides, and to my further shock he dropped my pants.

“Show me.”

I gaped at him. “Reaver!” I gasped, I felt flustered. I looked down, he was soft. I was confused, it made me take a step back.

“So maybe therapy session isn’t a bad idea...” Reaver shrugged, he lay on the bed and spread his legs apart. The look he gave me was mischievous, a bit impish too, he liked shocking me like this I could tell. With the corner of his mouth rose in a smirk he started stroking himself, my mouth was hung open in shock but I wasn’t going to deny it was arousing me.

“Reaver... what are you doing?” I stammered.

“It helped Reno get rid of the feelings, or at least replace them with better ones. Show me what you did.”

“I... I can’t have our first time be... be that! You just said...” Oh god my dick was throbbing, I hated my body for doing this to me.

“It wont go that far. I’ll stop it myself if it goes too far.” His hand was gliding up and down, with each stroke it got larger. The light coming through the open door was right on him. Fuck he was beautiful. Fully naked, bandaged and bruised. His hair now dry wisps over his forehead and cheeks. His black eyes grinning with his face.

His dick... my breathing was getting ragged. He drew his hand away so I could see all of it. His smooth shaft, two oval testicles with a thin gathering of black public hair. Then lower...

I could see the slight darkening of where his hole was. My eyes moved to his, then to his cock. Now fully hard. He was stroking it and watching me, just like Perish had been.

But it was different now, this was my boyfriend, like I had wished it had been when I had done it. Was Reaver a genius or just unable to kill the horniness we had bestowed on each other. Was this therapy for me, or him needing to get off.

Fuck, Reaver was naked and hard on his bed waiting for me. Why did I care?

I walked over to him, and he pulled both hands away as he did. I wanted to touch his dick, I wanted to see what it tasted like but I refrained.

“He was stroking the whole time,” I said. “You... you heard him.”

Reaver smiled and put his hands behind his head. “You’re not going to make me cum, not yet. Just show me what you did.”

I kneeled on the space of bed in front of him and leaned my weight against his legs. “I hope you know how unhealthy this is.”

“What part of our relationship has been healthy?” Reaver raised an eye brow at me, he reached a hand over and took mine. He drew my hand to his mouth and started sucking on my fingers. His mouth was warm, and wet, my mind immediately went to how it would feel elsewhere.