Falling Apart (Barely Alive #2) (2 page)

I wiped the sweat from my upper lip. Holy hell, his scream almost curdled my brain cells. I inched away from her.
Keep that damn finger away from me.
“The hungrier we get, the more exposed and sensitive our nerves get. You couldn’t hurt him, if he had food in his stomach.” Nausea washed over me. James hadn’t screamed like that in years around me – he’d just been in silent pain when Dominic had been in his head.

She pushed him back against the mattress, letting the bandage hang where it fell. She pierced me with eyes a matching blue to Heather’s. “You better get him food, then, and fast. I need to lance that wound before the infection spreads and attacks his heart. It’s close to the major organs. I don’t have antibiotics or antiviral meds. I could go into town, but I don’t know how long he has.” Words delivered with a calm steadiness helped more than she would ever know. I could deal with orders. I understood orders.

“Okay, I’ll be back as soon as I can. Thank you.” I ducked out without waiting for her reply. I couldn’t be there. I couldn’t hear him make that noise again. My hands shook.

I took off out the backdoor, avoiding the side yard where Heather enjoyed the early morning sunshine. The picture of her burnished curls branded in my never-resting mind.

Elk. I’d seen pictures. They were referred to as the ghosts of the forest. Could I find one? Or better yet, two? If not, I might have to settle for domestic feline.
Damn it.

Elk was hella delicious. Raw. I’d never had it cooked, but by the time I’d found the herd, I don’t think I would’ve waited to take a piss before eating. I snapped the herd bull’s neck and took down a smaller cow elk. The rest finally caught on I was out for blood and they scattered into the woods, the thunder of hooves on moss fading quickly into the shady forest.

I devoured a significant portion of the largest one. I couldn’t wrench the ivories from the bull’s jaw, so I decapitated him with a nearby rock and cradled the head under my arm and swung the smaller female on my shoulders. The going was a bit rough, but nothing stopped me. The meat filled me. Iron rustled through my blood. I could breathe again. The unbelievable relief slid along my extremities. The gray disappeared almost before my eyes.
Hey, yeah, Paul is back!

Every waft of air didn’t leave my fingers freezing and the minute hairs moving on my arms didn’t itch. For the briefest moment, normal returned. I adapted. The animal weight on my back didn’t exist with the return of my invincibility. If I pumped my fist into the air, would anyone see me?

My trip hadn’t taken long. I rushed onto the lawn and dropped the elk on the porch. Her blood had marked me and I stripped off my shirt before heading inside the house, flexing my pecs because they’d returned to their full selves and didn’t resemble a pre-teens concave chest. Yeah, Heather should see me now.

And,
there she was.
Holy crap, she was staring at me, too. I froze. I couldn’t look away. Our eyes met and the kiss from the night before tingled on my lips. Maybe my nerves were extremely sensitive around her regardless of how well I’d been fed or how recently. She seemed to have an odd effect on my physiology – not to mention my anatomy. Her gaze strayed to my wide shoulders and lower to my stomach. I wanted to cross my arms over my chest.

Heather met my eyes again, but only after having her fill of the view. Jeesh, the girl relegated me to a specimen in moments. Should I be flattered or feel exploited? I wasn’t some Chippendale. Her lips tilted, not into a smile but the suggestion of something for later. I hoped. She angled her body toward James’s room. “Grandma Jean said we should move him outside as soon as you get back, but he’s not letting anyone touch him. Says it hurts too much.” Aw, her voice created goose bumps where I was definitely not cold. She screwed her mouth to the side. “Plus, I’m not sure we can carry him. Connie and Travis are stuck in the library working hard on theories. Grandma Jean and I can’t carry him by ourselves. Your mom refuses to touch him when he screams.” She offered a small smile, I’m sure to reassure me and maybe to offer apologies. She’d tried.

I’d have to muscle James out. He’d have a complete turnaround once he had some meat in his stomach, just like when he was shot.

“Thanks, Heather. I got this.” I passed her, brushing against her arm with my chest… okay, totally on purpose, but my physique had returned and I couldn’t help it. “Sorry.” She looked down, her cheeks pink. Yeah, I still had it. If only she knew she tore me up inside, more than a simple flush would reveal.

Inside James’s room, Connie, Grandma Jean, and Mom gathered by the window, murmuring between themselves. I sought my brother in the bed, prepared to roll my eyes and make a face at the women clucking in the corner. But I forgot my intention and couldn’t stop myself from bursting out, “Holy crap, James. What’d you do while I was gone? Hell.” He’d grayed – and I don’t mean his fingertips – I mean his face, his chest, his upper arms, hell, even his lower arms. He matched the way my fingers had been no more than an hour ago. He hadn’t had the virus long enough to make that drastic of a change.

Without asking his permission or giving him a warning, I wrapped the comforter around him and bundled him into a cradle hold. He winced, a small moan breaking free. His feverish eyes flicked from object to object. He licked his lips, a dry rasp when his tongue hit flesh.

“Let’s go, bro.” I rushed him, jostling as little as possible, to the front door and onto the deck. I settled him onto the porch swing. He sighed when I released him. His head lulled to the side, his mouth agape. The immediate lethargy freaked me out.

I looked at the elk body, two inches from his feet and a head surrounded by blood. He didn’t acknowledge their presence. I was going to have to feed him. Fine. Whatever. He wasn’t dying on me. Not yet.

Dropping beside the closest body, I tore into the tough skin and yanked out a chunk of flank muscle. I shoved the entire handful into James’s mouth. He didn’t move. Nothing. I grasped his lower jaw in my fingers and forced him to chew, up, down, up, down. “Come on, James. You need to swallow. Just give me one good swallow and I’ll leave you alone. Promise.” Like hell I would, but in that exact moment, I’d say or do whatever the hell he needed to hear.

In the distance, a phone rang, the tinny peal loud in the silence yet subdued beneath my heavy breathing

His eyes didn’t flicker with recognition.
Nothing. Damn it.
I pulled his face into my hands and got as close as I could, eye to eye, without kissing him – he didn’t need that from me. I ignored the three women standing in the doorway. Mom’s sobs reached an irritating height but nothing pulled my focus from James. “Listen. You have to swallow. You’re going to die. Please. Eat.” Desperation tensed my muscles to the breaking point.

I held my breath. The waiting was worse than when I’d waited to find out if Heather would die from my bite. But… I watched close. Close. The smallest muscle twitch in his cheek rewarded me. “That’s it, James, come on.” His throat worked and he swallowed what had to be blood since the meat wasn’t macerated enough to push past his tongue. After another moment, he moved his jaw and chewed, slow, slow, but he got the job done and swallowed the load I’d shoved inside. He swallowed again.

Connie knelt beside me. I scraped another handful of the still warm meat and held it to his lips. He opened his mouth and closed his eyes. The second the meat absorbed into his body a pink flush tinged his lips and the thin skin of his eyelids. He opened his eyes, revealing a receding fever.

I blew out my breath.

James lurched forward. I moved to keep him from falling, but he threw himself on the animal, landing with his face in the exposed muscle tissue. A terrible, animalistic gnawing sound filled the air. I couldn’t move.

He was eating. In front of me, the peach coloring flooded his exposed skin like someone washed him with paint.

Heather stood behind me, her presence like the gravitational pull of the sun. A couple days and I was that strung out on a girl? I needed to get a hold of myself.
Ridiculous.
But I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over my shoulder to see her.
I’m a loser. I know.

Her large blue eyes were trained on me. A subtle shake of her head and a jerking motion with her hand called me to her.

James hadn’t stopped eating. I wouldn’t be surprised if both elk disappeared in minutes. To Connie, I whispered, “Can you watch him? I’ll be right back.”

She nodded, studying James’s actions and coloring.

I turned to Heather, ashamed to admit I’d rather stand beside her than worry anymore about my ravenous brother. She grabbed my arm when I reached her side and pulled me into the front room. Her fingers clutched me, her touch thrilling.

“What’s wrong?” I motioned over my shoulder. “If you’re worried about James, it looks like he’s going to be fine, now that he has some food in his gut.” Although, her worry about him wasn’t something I wanted to be blasé about. In fact, jealousy bit into me and I’d rather trade my green feelings for the burning nerves I’d left behind with the bull elk.

Her face paled. “No. I… um…
he
’s on the phone.” And I didn’t need her to spell it out for me. Dominic.

“He’s still on? What does he want?” The threat he imposed could be immediate or delayed, but either way I’d have to deal with him. I’d prefer being prepared with some sort of a vaccine or a cure – anything to make my position worth more than a girl’s genetic contribution to the cause.

Heather gasped, like she bobbed to the surface of a deep, thick lake. “Yes. I’m not sure. He said… He said that he was going to get me and that you’re the only one he wants to talk to.”

Interesting.
The asshole didn’t want James. Dominic’s mind control must not work over the phone. Unsure why I did it, but certain she needed comfort just the same, I pulled her into my arms, the side of her face pressed against my bare pec. Let the bastard wait another moment. Heather was freaking out. “I got you. It’s okay. He can’t reach you. And even if he showed up, we’ve dealt with him before.” I pushed her away to see her face. “You okay?”

Tears just breached the edge of her lids. I pulled her to my side. “Where’s the phone?”

A dainty finger pointed toward the side table. Her voice was steadier than I expected. “Grab that one and I’ll hang up the one in the kitchen.”

The phone irritated me. Damn cord connected me to Dominic. I didn’t want to deal with him. Staying in the land of elk in northern Idaho with the hottest girl I’d seen in a while and my brother and mom was like a vacation I needed. I approached the phone piece, looked over my shoulder, and rolled my head to each side.
Deep breath in, out, in, out. Do it fast, Paul, just do it.

I grabbed the handset and yanked it to my head so fast I knocked the side of my scalp above my ear. Had I not eaten, the bang would have hurt a helluva lot more. “Yep.” What else did he want? I didn’t owe him any manners.

His oily voice greased the phone line. “Paul, so glad to get a hold of you. Didn’t think you’d speak with me. How are you?”

How am I? Who in the hell…
“What do you want, Dominic? It sure as hell isn’t concern about me.”

“Oh, Paul, I’m hurt you would think I don’t care. Of course, I care. How’s your brother? And
Heather
…” His voice dripped facetiousness. The phone in the kitchen clicked. She’d hung up. I couldn’t answer. What did I have to say except f—

“Well, I’d like to discuss some options with you, Paully.”
Grr, that damn nickname.
“I think you and I have a vested interest in the well-being of your little girlfriend.”
I wish, maybe…
“I want her to solve some research issues and you don’t want anything to happen to her.”

He was right. I didn’t want anything to happen to her. But he was wrong, too. I needed her for research as well. He just didn’t know I had Travis Duncan, Ph.D. – Dominic’s previous research partner – and his wife with multiple initials after her name. I couldn’t let Heather go, even if I wanted to.

Her immunity to my virus might save my brother. Might save me.

“You know I’m right. It’s not something to think so hard about.” His smug smile rang over the line. “Come on, Paul. You’re an original. You should be with me. Reveling in what you are.”

I couldn’t help myself. I’d been raised in Vegas, that didn’t mean I knew how to bluff or wanted to learn. “Look, I need her, too. Duncan can fix your mess and maybe we can protect some people. You’re not the smartest person in the world, Dominic.”
Damn.
I closed my eyes and dropped my head.
Never give away more than you’re willing to deal with.
I think that’s how it works.

His silence screamed.

What had I done? Now he had more reason to chase us north. I roostered up. “Does that piss you off? That I have Duncan? Does it surprise you that I would go after a resolution to this mess you made? You’re the dumbass that dragged my brother into this. Now you get to deal with the consequences. Got it?”

His silence answered me. But I knew he was there. And I’d gotten under his skin. His oily, charming, super-slick lizard skin.

We sat there – him on his end doing who knows what and me on my end, staring at the wood grain of a very classy side table made of a solid hardwood stained dark and shiny. I reached out and grazed my fingers over the smooth surface. My nerves weren’t as sensitive as they’d been before the elk, but the grain made a palpable impression.