Fallen (30 page)

Glancing at me, she let out a soft laugh. “I always imagined what I’d say to you if I ever got the chance, and now that I’m here, I can’t find the words.”

I knew exactly how she felt. I was at a total loss, too.

She studied me for several silent minutes. “You’ve fed recently. I was afraid you wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, well…” I swallowed, unsure of what to say.

“There’s another way, you know.”

My eyes snapped up to hers, narrowing as I frowned. Was she saying what I
thought
? “Another way, how?”

She glanced back at the patio doors and then leaned forward, lowering her voice. “We can feed on the dead.”

The world tilted on its axis as I stared at her, dumbstruck. 

Whoa, whoa, whoa
— “What? But Gabriel never mentioned—” My words died as my mind reeled. 

I won’t have to kill anyone?

Vivienne nodded. “It’s a little secret I’ve discovered. So long as the bodies are relatively fresh and they didn’t die from sickness.” She glanced back at Gabriel and I followed her gaze, watching him pace the living room as he talked on the phone.

“Be forewarned, living this way can come with some…unexpected consequences.”

I was sure that whatever it was, it would be worth it if it meant I didn’t have to hurt anybody else. “Like what?”

“A baby.” She gave me a small smile. “It messes with your cycle, so you don’t know when you’re fertile and when you’re…not.”

So
that
was how she ended up with me. Huh.

“Do you have any other children?”

She shook her head. “Just you.”

I looked out over the dark city, gripping the railing as I forced the next words out. “What about Isaac?”

“He has a son and daughter with his wife. They’re a couple centuries older than you.” She sounded uncomfortable as she said it, but I was glad she was honest.

“You have his eyes.” There was a touch of sadness to her voice.

It was one thing for your parent not to want you, but for them to
actively
want you dead… Well, it broke my fucking heart. The one person who was supposed to love you and protect you above all others and I was nothing more than a mistake to him. Something that needed to be
fixed
.

Ignoring the painful, dry ache in my throat, I said, “How could you— I mean, he’s
so
—”

A sad smile touched her lips as she looked down to her blouse and smoothed the front. “He wasn’t always so hateful.”

A few minutes of awkward silence followed before she said, “Gabriel told me about your parents. I’m sorry you’re in pain today from of a decision I made twenty years ago, but—” Her eyes grew shiny. “I don’t ever want you to think for one second that I didn’t want you. I’ve loved you since the moment I found out you were coming into this world, and I’ll love you long after you leave it. Your safety was, and is, the most important thing in the world to me. I’d die to protect it.”

She wiped away her tears, and her fierce words left me stunned.

I’d always wondered how much she could truly love me if she stayed away all these years, and now I realized it wasn’t without great heartache. Now I understood stepping aside from the one you loved if it meant they were better off without you. That didn’t make it hurt any less, but I got it.

She reached out, but hesitated, her hand hovering over mine on the railing. With tentative fingers, she slipped it over me. “Sophie will always be your mom, and that’s something I’ll have to live with for the rest of my life, but…just know that you have me, too.”

And with that, we stood in silence as I watched the sunrise with my mother.

Epilogue

Two weeks later...

THOMAS

“Where do you want this?”

I glanced up, seeing Matt carry a box labeled “bathroom.” 

“You can put it over there,” I said, nodding to the growing stack of boxes by the front door. I finished wrapping newspaper around the glass in my hand and set it inside the box in front of me. “Movers will be here at nine. You gonna crash here tonight?”

Matt yawned and nodded, flopping down onto my couch. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

The packing tape screeched as I unrolled a piece over the flaps of the box. “You know I can’t stay here.” I smoothed it out and tore off the end from the roll.

“That’s not what I meant. I meant…are you sure you’re done with her?”

“She was done with me the second she left,” I said, lifting the box and stacking it off to the side.

Matt sat up. “That’s not what I asked. Are
you
done with
her
?”

“She. Doesn’t. Want me.” I glowered at him as I grabbed another box.

“Did she say that?”

She didn’t have to. The “I love him” did it for her.

Mel walked into the living room, shooting Matt a scowl. “Leave him alone.”

“I just don’t get it, man. You loved her
so
much, and you’ve always been such a fighter, but now you’re just gonna throw in the towel because there’s a little competition?”

“A little competition” would be if he’d made a move on her. The fact that she’d
let
him make that move was game over. He won.

“He’s better for her. He can give her things that I can’t.” Emily was it for me. She was the best I’d ever get. And I’d been too consumed with missing her that I didn’t stop to ask myself a crucial question—was
I
the best person for
her
?

It was a hard question to answer objectively, because I wasn’t impartial. I was too emotionally invested. But if I took my feelings out of the equation and had an honest look at the situation, the answer became clear. 

I was
not
the best for her. Em belonged with someone more like her, someone who could understand her needs. And that someone wasn’t me.

Matt’s voice was incredulous. “What can
he
give her that
you
can’t?”

“Empathy.” 

Matt and Mel looked at each other, sharing a confused expression since I hadn’t told them what Em really was. Maybe I was a chump, but I don’t know…it just felt like that was her secret to tell, not mine.

Matt shook his head and looked back at me. “So that’s it,” he said, disbelief coloring his tone. “You’re just gonna give up. You’re not gonna fight for her at all.”

Pretty much.

Emily’s story isn’t over yet! Look for the final book of The Hidden Trilogy,
Torn Asunder
, in winter of 2013!

Emily’s Playlist

• Ida Maria, “Oh My God”
  
• Florence + the Machine, “Rabbit Heart”
  
• Matchbox Twenty, “Bent”
  
• Of Monsters and Men, “Little Talks”
  
• Disturbed, “Down With the Sickness”
  
• Sister Hazel, “Your Winter”
  
• Radiohead, “Videotape”
  
• Coldplay, “The Scientist”
  
• Red Hot Chili Peppers, “Soul to Squeeze”
  
• MGMT, “Time to Pretend”
  
• Kings of Leon, “Revelry”
  
• Blink-182, “I Miss You”
  
• Counting Crows, “Colorblind”
  
• Metric, “Help I’m Alive”
  
• Incubus, “Under My Umbrella”
  
• Dashboard Confessional, “Finishing School”
  
• Korn, “Coming Undone”
  
• Imagine Dragons, “Radioactive”
  
• Fun, “Some Nights”
  
• Rihanna, “We Found Love”
  
• Delta Spirit, “Yamaha”
  

Gabriel’s Playlist

• Silversun Pickups, “Sort Of”
  
• Limp Bizkit, “Eat You Alive”
  
• Coldplay, “Fix You”
  
• Interpol, “Untitled”
  
• Angus & Julia Stone, “Big Jet Plane”
  
• The Bravery, “Believe”
  
• Placebo, “Every You Every Me”
  
• Smashing Pumpkins, “Disarm”
  
• Fever Ray, “If I Had a Heart”
  
• Gym Class Heroes, “Holy Horseshit, Batman!!”
  
• Radiohead, “House of Cards”
  
• Scala & Kolacny Brothers, “Creep”
  
• AWOLNATION, “Sail”
  
• Frightened Rabbit, “Footshooter”
  
• Kings of Leon, “Knocked Up”
  
• Silversun Pickups, “Catch & Release”
  
• Staind, “Take This”
  
• The National, “Sorrow”
  
• Frightened Rabbit, “Backwards Walk”
  
• Jimmy Eat World, “Work”
  
• Paper Route, “Good Intentions”
  
• Band of Horses, “I Go to the Barn...”
  

Thomas’s Playlist

• Coldplay, “Yellow”
  
• Dave Matthews Band, “Where Are You Going”
  
• Blue Foundation, “Watch You Sleeping”
  
• Bon Iver, “Skinny Love”
  
• Blink-182, “After Midnight”
  
• System of a Down, “Lonely Day”
  
• The Weepies, “World Spins Madly On”
  
• Band of Horses, “Factory”
  
• Blink-182, “What Went Wrong?”
  
• Story of the Year, “Until the Day I Die”
  
• Queens of the Stone Age, “Millionaire”
  
• Linkin Park, “Waiting for the End”
  
• Kings of Leon, “The End”
  
• Paper Route, “You Kill Me”
  
• Matchbox Twenty, “How Far We’ve Come”
  
• Breaking Benjamin, “Sooner or Later”
  
• Brand New, “Sink”
  
• Mayday Parade, “I’d Hate to Be You When People Find Out What This Song is About”
  
• Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, “Love Burns”
  

About the Author

Kelley lives in the great state of Texas, but she swears it’s not all country music and cowboy boots... Okay, some of it is, but not all of it. She’s got an amazing husband, who continues to inspire her everyday. Even after twelve years and two of the cutest little girls you could possibly imagine.

Thank you for purchasing this ebook. Follow me on twitter:
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