Fairytale Lost (2 page)

Em laughed at that. She turned her head back toward Isabel. “I know you and Zavia are scared I am going to go running back to him. And while I can’t say it’s never going to happen, I can say it’s certainly not what I want.”

“That’s good to hear. And you’re right—we are very scared of that happening. After last time, let’s just say we have every right to be concerned.” Isabel sat up in the chair and gave Em her serious face. “Okay, so what do you want to do tonight?”

“I don’t care. Don’t you have any ideas?” Em flipped over on her side and pulled her knees up to her chest.

“Of course.” Isabel jumped off the chaise and ran to her bag in the kitchen. She came back holding DVDs. “We are going old new school ––
Doctor Who
marathon! I just love nine.”

“You are such a nerd,” Em laughed. “Besides, anyone with half-a-grain of sense knows eleven is the best.”

Isabel picked up a pillow and hit Em lightly across the shoulder. “Whatever. I notice you didn’t say no.”

“Shut up, and put the disc in,” Em mumbled, refusing to make eye contact. The two old friends laughed and settled in for several hours of sci-fi TV watching.

A
ll through high school
, Em and Zavia knew they’d be going to college together. When the time finally came, they got rooms in the same dorm, just three doors from each other. They briefly considered rooming together, but with Em being just shy of a total disaster and Zavia being slightly obsessive compulsive, both knew that would be a terrible idea.

The college years seemed to fly by. Once senior year rolled around, the girls wanted to move off-campus and decided an apartment would be okay—Em had to promise not to junk up the public spaces, and Zavia had to promise not to clean Em’s room when she wasn’t home.

Zavia had always known that she wanted to be an interior designer when she grew up. As graduation neared, she was fielding several offers from design houses all along the east coast. Em never understood why Zavia studied civil engineering if she wanted to pick wall paper for a living, but Zavia was always one with a plan.

Em, on the other hand, flew through college by the seat of her pants. She changed majors four times in two years then had to go to summer school to graduate with Zavia once she’d decided on computer science. She didn’t have a burning passion for the subject, but the subject was interesting and related careers paid well right out of college.

While in those CS courses, she’d met Lukas, who wasn’t a student at the university, but rather a local that worked in the computer lab. He would always flirt with her when she came to use the computers, and she found him to be attractive and funny. She finally got the nerve to ask him to coffee on campus, but he told her he couldn’t because dating students was against university regulations for staff.

The day after graduation, as Em and Zavia were packing up their apartment, Lukas stopped by and asked Em if the offer for coffee was still open. She jumped up and wiped her hands on her pants.

“Hi! Of course.” She paused. “How did you know where I live?”

Lukas had the most adorable sheepish smile when he replied that his sister lived in the building, and he had seen Em once while he was there visiting. “I’ve avoided the building since that day so you wouldn’t think I was some creep stalker.”

They went to coffee later that day. Zavia and Robert were busy finalizing plans for their wedding, so Em didn’t feel too guilty leaving the apartment half packed. Coffee easily turned into dinner. They talked for hours about any number of subjects.

“Why didn’t you ever go to college? You seem smart enough,” she blurted out, blushing in shame at the politically incorrect question.

“I went into the Army right after high school. I got injured pretty bad during a deployment. It took me a couple of years to be able to walk and regain the use of my right hand. After that, the thought of sitting in a classroom just made me crazy.”

“Oh my goodness,” Em exclaimed. “I never would have guessed.”

“Would either of you like something else? I am about to go off duty, so I’d like to close your ticket, if you don’t mind.” The waitress seemed impatient to be off, so they paid their bill and left the restaurant.

“I’ll walk you home.” Lukas reached out and took Em’s hand. Their hands touched, and alarms went off in Em’s head. She’d never had such a strong reaction with anyone else she’d dated before. She looked up at Lukas and noticed he had the same stunned look on his face.

When they reached her door, he leaned down and gently kissed her on the lips. Though brief, the kiss was powerful and intense. Emmalyn was totally breathless. She also couldn’t force herself to walk inside the apartment. They stood staring at each other until the apartment door was yanked open by a furious Zavia.

“Where the hell have you been? I’ve been calling you non-stop, but of course you’d never know that since you left your damn phone here. I don’t know why you bother paying for the damn thing since you
never
have it on you!” Zavia’s lecture cut off abruptly when she noticed neither Em nor Lukas had been paying her the least bit of attention.

“Hello!” Zavia reached out and pinched Em’s arm. Em reluctantly pulled her eyes away from Lukas and frowned at her friend.

“Ouch! What’s that all about?” asked Em, rubbing the sore spot on her arm.

“Are you shitting me right now? I’ve been worried sick about what could have happened to you. Damn it all Emmalyn Judith!” Zavia snarled, her eyes shifting back and forth between her friend and the complete stranger she’d worried had likely sold Em into slavery hours ago.

“Why didn’t you just call me?” Em began patting her pockets then looking in her purse for her phone. Zavia held it up for her to see.

“Looking for this? You left here without your phone. Again.”

“I’m sorry, Zee.”

In response to Em’s lame apology, Zavia turned back into the apartment and slammed the door behind her.

Em flinched. “I better go after her. Thanks for coffee and dinner. I really enjoyed being with you today.” She stood rooted in place, smiling like an idiot. She didn’t care. Lukas had the same ridiculous grin.

“When are you leaving town? I’d like to see you again.”

“Day after tomorrow. Zee is getting married Saturday morning, then after the reception, I’m moving into the city for my new job.” Emmalyn had a hard time focusing with Lukas’s thumbs rubbing circles in her palms.

“Okay. So, how about dinner tomorrow?”

“I can’t. The rehearsal dinner is tomorrow. But we can meet after that. We’re having the bachelorette party tonight. Zee doesn’t want to be hung over for the wedding.”

“Okay. I’ll be waiting.” He kissed her again, just as lightly, just as powerfully. He laid a finger on her cheek before walking down the hall away from the apartment. She watched him leave the building, not able to move until he was in his car and driving away.

Zavia opened the door again. “You’re an idiot.”

Em’s smile faltered just a bit as she turned to her very best friend in the world.

“I’m in love!” She gave her friend a huge, goofy grin as she stepped into the apartment.

Zavia groaned, having heard this before. Many times. “Just tell me you didn’t sleep with him.”

“What? Of course not. But he did kiss me. Twice. We just shared the most amazing kiss in the history of inter-lip relations.”

Zavia rolled her eyes and went back to packing books. She frowned when she realized Emmalyn was still standing in the doorway. “You do plan to help at some point tonight, right?”

“Yes, Master!” Em walked into the room with her arms out like a zombie. Zavia burst into laughter and threw the tape at her.

“Bitch!”

Em joined in the laughter and the two friends continued to prepare for the next stage of their lives.

T
he next couple
of months passed quickly. Emmalyn and Lukas grew closer, seeing each other every weekend. The first time they slept together, Em was absolutely sure she had found her soul mate. Everything about the experience was perfect. Though she had been able to bring herself to orgasm for some time, Lukas was the first man to be able to, and he brought her intense pleasure many times that night. He knew exactly how to touch her, kiss her, hold her. He instinctively understood what her body needed and was able to give her that and so much more.

And she found ways to please him that no other woman had. Every part of her melded perfectly with his, as if made just for him. He felt so incredibly lucky to have found someone that was so compatible with him, and didn’t feel the need to be false or misleading.

The first time Lukas told Em he loved her was on their six-month anniversary. They were out to dinner, and he had presented her with a beautiful pair of pearl earrings. She was putting them in her ears when his words shocked her into absolute stillness.

“This can’t be a surprise to you, Em,” he laughed. “I mean, you had to know how I feel about you.”

“I did know. I just wasn’t sure if it was real or if I just really wanted it to be. I love you too. I think I’ve always known.”

“Thank God.” Lukas leaned back in his chair and wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. “I’ll admit I was a little worried by the look on your face.”

“I just wasn’t expecting you to say that so soon. It’s been a perfect night. Let’s get out of here.”

That night they made love over and over. Lukas took Em in just about every way possible, the depth of their love displayed in every kiss, every caress, and every stroke. Just when Em felt she wouldn’t be able to take another breath, Lukas was able to find another sensitive place and get her going all over again. Em wanted the night to go on forever. She loved the man and loved every orgasm he gave her. Eventually, she fell asleep, fully sated, against Lukas’s chest, dreaming of their wedding day and the house full of kids they were going to have.

The relationship wasn’t always a bed of roses, though. Emmalyn was exacting and had a tendency to be somewhat intolerant of faults in others. She expected perfection in herself and pushed hard to succeed in her career. Lukas was the exact opposite. While he worked hard for what he wanted, he was happy where he was and preferred to run his life as the situations occurred. He had very little patience for Em’s planning and tended to break plans with no notice. Lukas’s seat-of-the-pants attitude drove Em crazy. The majority of their fights were because Lukas broke his word to Em, not showing when he said he would but mostly breaking or changing plans at the last minute.

There were times when Em felt that if Lukas really loved her as he said he did, he’d be able to keep his word. Lukas, on the other hand, felt that Em put too many restrictions on him with her incessant planning and wished she would relax and enjoy life more. What he couldn’t see was that with each broken promise and each missed date, he was pushing her further and further away.

Their worst and final fight came the night Lukas missed Em’s promotion party. His father needed help moving furniture, and he’d stopped there first to give his old man a hand. He and his father ended up talking so long that by the time he made his way to the restaurant where the party was held, Em was gone. Isabel had told him that Emmalyn had left the restaurant more than an hour before, crying. Lukas felt terrible, but he really didn’t think the situation was that big a deal. His pops needed him. Surely, that took precedent over some work party, right? By that point, he was no longer so sure.

He walked slowly into the apartment carrying the flowers and present he’d bought for her. As he crossed the threshold, he stumbled, tripping over something large in the darkness of the foyer. He flipped on the light to find a pair of large suitcases. He didn’t recognize them, but he didn’t think that was a good sign. He dropped his head to his chest and took a deep breath, steeling himself before walking into the fight he knew was waiting for him. He found Emmalyn sitting at the dining room table eating an entire round cake with a glass of wine. She wasn’t crying, and she didn’t look upset. Perhaps fortune was smiling on him—except for the suitcases in the hall. This was Em’s apartment, so obviously she wasn’t leaving.

She finally spoke, her voice calm and clear and devoid of any emotion, bringing Lukas out of his musing. “Those are your bags in the hallway. I took the liberty of stopping on the way home and picking up the bags since you didn’t have any here and you sure as hell aren’t taking any of mine. Now, get out.” She lifted the wine glass and took a long drink.

“Em, wait a minute. Let’s talk about this,” Lukas said desperately. This wasn’t like any other fight they’d had, and he’d grossly misjudged the situation.

Em rose from her seat and glared at Lukas. The look in her eyes scared him. He’d never seen her, or anyone for that matter, that angry. The look was so intense he didn’t notice that she had picked up the plate with the cake, didn’t notice the movement, in fact, until she had thrown the plate at his head. He tried to duck, but the plate caught him on his ear and broke. Cake and blood went everywhere.

“I have absolutely nothing to say to you.
Get out, now!
” she bellowed.

“Em, I was with Pop. He needed me,” Lukas tried to explain.

“I. Needed. You!” Em took a couple of deep breaths and calmed her voice. Calming the storm in her heart, however, could take much, much longer. “What did he need that was so important that you would miss today? You, of all people, should know how hard I worked for that promotion. I told everyone how you’d be there. And I sat there waiting, like an idiot. Just like I always do.”

Lukas tried to move closer to her. He knew if he could just pull her into his arms, he would make her see reason. She knew this as well. As soon as he took a step, she grabbed the wine glass and broke it against the table. Wine and glass flew everywhere.

“Emmy, please. I don’t want to go, please.” He realized he didn’t care if she cut him. Losing her would be worse than any cut. He took another step toward her. Instead of swiping at him, she held the broken glass to her wrist.

“I swear if you come any closer to me, I’ll cut myself.” Em knew well enough that Lukas wouldn’t care what she did to him, but he’d never let her hurt herself. She hated herself for doing this and for the weakness in her that wanted to just forget everything and run into those arms that had held her so many nights.

“God damn it, Emmalyn, this is not funny.” He’d never known Emmalyn to act so irrationally. Just the opposite, she was always too rational, too linear. He wanted to kick himself for pushing her that far.

“I know it’s not, and I’m not joking. You really don’t see what you’ve done, do you? Let me shed some light on the subject for you. Do you remember the first night we were together?”

“Of course I do. You know I do.”

“I remember that conversation like it just happened. I wanted to lie there with you forever. You asked me what my deal breakers were. Remember what I said?” she asked too calmly for someone holding broken glass to her own wrist.

He did, and as his mind registered the severity of his situation, he took a step back and slid down the wall onto the floor.

“Oh c’mon, Lukas, what did I say? You’re the one always saying how you remember every conversation we’ve ever had.” She waited for him to speak, growing increasingly frustrated. “
What did I say
?”