Exposed: Book One of The Love Seekers Series (14 page)

Me:
I’m not looking for you to fuck up. There, did I wait long enough that time?

Bryan:
LOL. Yes.

             
I didn’t know what to say to him and thought about shutting down tonight’s conversation, but before I could, he pinged again.

Bryan:
I didn’t mean to put you on edge or anything like that. I only wanted to know what Mel knew about you.

I thought I covertly asked.

Me:
She came over here demanding answers.

Bryan:
That’s because she’s a curious little wench that likes to stick her fucking nose where it doesn’t belong. She barges in on people whether she’s wanted or not, and constantly does shit to piss me off. I swear she is worse than my sister sometimes.

             
Images of him stripping down to his Captain America underwear popped into my head, and for the first time tonight, I started laughing. Thankfully, he couldn’t see or hear me because my body folded over my computer and I almost knocked it to the ground. I was dying to know if there was any possible evidence. Maybe video or pictures.
Oh the possibilities…
That and I could hold it over his head for a long time to come.

             
Bryan:
You still there?

             
I took in a deep breath and straightened my body. His next response made me giggle some more. I guess he thought I was still mad at him. And the second part shocked me silent.

Bryan:
I’m really sorry. I promise not to mention anything to nosey rosy again.

And don’t listen to Mel.

Hell, she’s the reason I almost got arrested before I left to report into the Navy.

             
Arrested? Now this was a story I wanted details about.

             
Me:
What? Arrested?

             
Bryan:
Not saying.

             
Me:
Oh no. You have to spill after that set up.

             
Bryan:
Actually, I don’t.

             
Me:
What if I said I forgive you?

             
Bryan:
Tit for tat. Just remember that.

             
Me:
Whatever.

             
I knew Mel tended to walk on the wild side, and didn’t always like to follow the rules, so police involvement wasn’t a complete surprise. That said, to hear that she hadn’t changed in almost a decade, and that Bryan found himself in the middle of it all, I needed to know what happened. It was a moral imperative. A necessity.

              Hearing this story, along with the others he had shared, was probably not the best thing for me. I absorbed everything he said like a sponge, desiring to learn all I could about him. Every little tidbit fascinated me, and that could become dangerous. I should have marked a line in the sand, poured concrete so it never disappeared, and then stayed on the other side opposite of him.

Bryan:
Fine.

I decided to join the Navy when I was 16, but didn’t join up until I was 20.

Since my birthday is in Dec, I actually got to start school when I was 4 and graduate at 17—a year earlier than most people. In between school and the Navy, I went to college because I promised my parents I would get a college degree before I committed myself.

I got my degree in three instead of four years, joined the NROTC. Uh the Naval Reserve Officers Training Corps. They are like the JROTC or junior ROTC that some high schools have.

             
Me:
I know what they are.

             
Bryan:
I wasn’t sure.

Anyway. I joined them in college, and between them and my degree, I entered the Navy as an officer. Two days before I’m supposed to leave town, Mel gets this brilliant idea that we need to go cow tipping. She also managed to sneak out a whole bottle of Grey Goose vodka. Needless to say, we got extremely drunk, and I agreed to go with her.

The farmer called the cops. The cops came out. Even after I threw up on his pants and shoes, we only got a warning because the chief happened to be Mel’s uncle.

We were so fucking lucky. I still hate vodka.

             
I snorted with laughter again, causing Curley to whimper. Cow tipping? Really? I didn’t know what I expected him to type but getting drunk on vodka and cow tipping definitely wasn’t it.

              Somehow, I managed to quickly type two words. My dog decided to hide in the bedroom until I settled down. I couldn’t help it. This whole story tickled my funny bone—so to speak.

Me:
Yep, lucky.

Bryan:
I know you are over there laughing at me again. Live it up because I’m sure you have stories that are equally embarrassing.

             
Several minutes passed since his last message, and I was pretty sure it was so I could regain some sort of control over my laughter.

Me:
Nope. Not laughing. I’m a sweet, innocent angel.

Bryan:
I call bullshit. LOL.

Me:
It’s true. Sweet, innocent, and never does anything wrong. I thought you already knew that abut me.

Bryan:
Everyone has something hidden. I’ll figure it out one of these days. ;)

Me:
You act as if I’m going to let you remain in my good graces in the future.

Bryan:
Now you sound like the empress. LMAO.

Me:
Bow down to me.

Bryan:
LOL. Sorry honey, but we’re friends now and you are stuck w me forever.

Me:
Well fuck. Can I give back my consolation prize?

Bryan:
Nope. Stuck.

             
I should have probably dropped the subject since we had already moved past it, but I still asked. I wanted an explanation.

             
Me:
Why did you ask Mel about me?

             
Bryan:
I already told you.

             
Me:
Yeah, but you didn’t have to ask her about me.

              Had I pushed him too far? No typing, no nothing popped up on the screen. I sat there with my hands clenched into fists at my side, my teeth gnawing on my lip, waiting for him to respond.

              When it came to Bryan, my mind had become an expert of conjuring images. I pictured him staring at the computer screen sighing, scratching his face, and shaking his head. I’d only met him in person once several months ago, and yet, his features were ingrained in my head and memories. I imagined him with scruff, without scruff, his hazel eyes crinkled as he smiled and his dimples creating divots in his cheeks. In his Navy uniform, out of it, little or no clothes as his six pack rippled his abs. Navy, college, high school. I could imagine them all with clarity, and my mental image left me wanting. With as vivid as the memory of that karaoke night was, I didn’t need to see pictures of him, I only needed to close my eyes.

              I still waited. It took almost ten minutes before he started to respond, and I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until the air in my lungs demanded to be released, coming out in a loud whoosh.

Bryan:
It always felt as if you were holding something back, I thought if I talked to someone who knew you it would give me some sort of clue.

Me:
I’ve probably been more open with you than most.

             
Trust never came easy to me, but what I told him was true. Maybe I confided in him because it felt safe to do so online, or maybe there was something else there.

             
Bryan:
More open is not telling me everything.

              My eyebrow quirked and I shook my head.
Greedy.

Me:
You aren’t my bff. LOL.

             
Bryan:
How long have you known her?

             
Me:
Since my dad retired from the Navy.

             
Bryan:
And that’s Gia?

             
Me:
You remembered.

Bryan:
You’ve mentioned her a couple of times, but yeah, I remembered. So? When did you two meet?

             
Me:
We were both 12 and in the same grade.

Bryan:
Long time to know someone. Where did you meet?

Me:
Texas. She was one of the first people I met in the new neighborhood. We became instant friends and were almost inseparable from day one. She knows me better than anyone. She always has my back and I have hers. Now that she’s married with a kid and I live in SC, we don’t see each other as often, but we talk all the time. Her family claims me, and mine does the same for her.

Bryan:
Everyone deserves a friend like that.

Me:
You and Mel have been friends for a while. I have to ask, did you eever think about dating her?

             
Not sure why I pried, but my curiosity got the better of me.

Bryan:
If I throw up on my computer, will you buy me a new one?

Me:
Funny. She has the same reaction.

Bryan:
Then why ask?

Me:
Because.

Bryan:
Did you ever consider dating your bff?

Me:
Hell no. She’s a girl and I’m into guys. Haha.

Bryan:
To me, Mel is like my sister. I can’t ever imagine dating my sister. And besides, feelings beyond friendship never came into play.

             
I blamed my growing incessant need to know everything about him on my next question. I needed to stop myself, and was unable to do so.

             
Me:
Have you ever been in love?

             
Bryan:
No, but I thought I was a time or two. You?

             
Me:
I don’t know any more.

             
Bryan:
Ok. I have a test for you.

             
He changed the subject rather quickly, and for that I was grateful. That said, a test? I didn’t realize I still attended school.

Me:
What?
             

Did he sense my distress? I could not be sure, but he tried to reassure me.

Bryan:
Don’t worry. Mel’s going too. My friend is having a party/BBQ, and you got an invite.

Telling me not to worry, made me worried and anxious. A party? A friend? I wasn’t so sure about any of this. Had I met this friend?

Me:
What friend?

Bryan:
Doesn’t matter. You’re going.

That meant I didn’t know this so called friend.
Great, but not really.

Me:
Nope, I’m not.

Bryan:
Yes, you are. Look, Mel knows him too. She’s the one that told me about the party, so you don’t have to worry. She and Luke will both be there as moral support. They just don’t know it yet. :D

Did he really expect me to go to a party where no one knew me? Where they would look at me like I was some sort of freak? No, thank you. I was scared. I could admit it.

After the blind date, the only time I had left my house was when my sister forced me to her cookout or brunch, or when I had to go to the store or doctor. My self-esteem took a beating that night, and while I knew Bryan had been working on helping me overcome my issues, fear held me prisoner. It shackled me and refused to let go. Most therapists would have told me to break the yoke that bound me, jump off the cliff, face my fears, and put myself out there. I’ve done that before, and this was the result. I had become what my granny would call
plum pitiful.