Everything You Need (15 page)

He strode to her. “She’s not my girlfriend.”

She went to the armchair and set her bag on it. “Does she know that?”

“We’re just friends. Just ignore her.”

Just ignore her
! Ignore the girl he had said he loved? Did he say the same thing about her to Mary, too? An annoyance awoken by Mary rose up and knotted inside her. “Is that what you say to all the girls? Or just to the special ones?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Did you say the same thing to Mary, too?”

“Are you jealous?” A smirk curved his mouth.

“Jealous.” That was his response? That she was jealous. The annoyance flamed into anger. “That’s all you can say?”

“What did you expect me to say?” He frowned, looking confused.

“She’s in love with you.”

“I know. But she’s just a friend. Only a friend. There’s nothing going on between us.”

That’s why he had told Mary he loved her, right? A liar -- he was such a liar -- and here she was believing that he was -- she shook her head. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter what he was. It was just posing and sex, that was all that was between them.

His hands curled around her shoulders. “There really isn’t anything going on between us, I swear.”

“Whatever.” She tore herself away from his grip and, pushing the bag aside, she sat down in the armchair. She needed to go home, to curl up on her bed and to process what had just happened. She needed to make another adjustment. Her nails cut into the softness of her palms and she hid her fists in the pockets of her hoodie. Yes, it was only posing and sex, but from now on, it would be posing only. It would have to be. All she had to do was to push through those twelve hours she owed him and then, even though she wouldn’t be able to erase him out of her mind, she would rip him out of her life.

Chapter 16

Ashton sighed and his fingers rubbed his neck as he stared at the blonde who sat on the couch in front of him, and who, in the fifteen minutes since she had entered the studio, hadn’t said anything beyond ‘hello.’ She was an ice sculpture, so cold. He sighed again and leaned over her to brush a wayward strand of blond hair away from her face.

She flinched and glanced up at him before her gaze got lost in the distance again.

The first time she had been like that, he had thought it was just her sulking over Mary, and that if he gave her time, she would soon get over her silent treatment. No such luck. It was already Thursday, their third meeting, and she was still unyielding and sulking the same as she had been on Tuesday, without even a hint of warming up. He had never known she could be so stubborn. “Don’t be like this,” he requested in a soft, almost pleading voice.

“Do you plan to sketch me or not?”

“I talked to Mary, I asked her to stop bothering you.” And he would have told his friend much more, but she had hung up on him and now refused to answer his calls. “What more do you want me to do?”

“If you don’t plan to draw me, I’m going home.”

He swore, fixed his hand against the back of the couch and pushed himself away. “Fine. Let’s draw you then.” He strode to the desk, pulled the drawer open and took an empty sketchpad out of it, before he slammed it shut. With the sketchpad under his arm and a pencil stuffed into the pocket of his jeans, he dragged the stool in front of the couch, making as much noise as he could.

She didn’t even blink, let alone comment.

He set the stool down, slumped onto it, opened the sketchbook and started to draw. With every line he made, the frustration caused by her behaviour melted away. He loved drawing her almost the same way he loved to touch her. The minutes ticked past, with their breathing, the scratches of pencil and the swish of the paper the only sounds that filled the space. “Could you turn to the right and shift your chin down, please?”

She obeyed his instruction.

“No, too far to the right. Look at the window, as if you were peeking sideways at it.”

She shifted in the chair.

“No, not your whole body, just your head.” He stood up and went around the table to loom over her. He bent down and gently took hold of her chin and slightly turned it. The scent of her drifted over him and suddenly he couldn’t move. He refused to move.

From the corner of her eye she looked up at him.

His thumb brushed the line of her jaw.

She swallowed.

She was so beautiful. By now he had captured on paper almost all of the expressions she had showed him; even the one with her eyes unfocused, cheeks flushed and with her mouth slightly ajar as her lungs gasped for air. Just thinking about it, desire washed over him and he wanted to see that expression again, while he was still inside her, moving. He clenched his jaw, as if that would help him get rid of the need for her.

For a short second, her eyelids fluttered closed and the harsh lines around her eyes and mouth smoothed out, but then she opened her eyes again and they were glaring at him. “What are you doing?” Her voice was low, almost a whisper.

“Can I kiss you?”

She cleared her throat and fixed her gaze before her. “I’m not going to sleep with you.”

“I just want to kiss you.” His fingers glided over her chin and then down her neck.

“It’s never just kissing.”

“I won’t do anything that you don’t want me to, I promise. You might not trust me, but you can trust me on this.” He bent down until his mouth touched the top of her head and he closed his eyes as he deeply inhaled her scent.

“I might not trust myself.” She slipped away from him, stood and took a few steps backwards. “Don’t touch me anymore, please.”

He leaned on the arm of the chair, then sighed before he lifted his eyes to hers. “I love you. I want to touch you, kiss you and make love to you.”

Her arms wrapped around her middle, and her eyebrows furrowed. “I thought you only fuck.”

It sounded so vulgar coming from her mouth. He crossed his arms. “Is that how it felt?”

“Yes.”

“Look at me.”

“I am looking at you.”

“No you are not.” He rose and, before she had a chance to move away, he was by her side and he framed her face with his hands. “I love you.”

She pinched her mouth together.

She was not only ignoring his confession of love, but it looked as if it annoyed her, and it felt like a punch to his stomach. “Say something.”

She fixed her gaze on something behind him.

“I just told you that I love you, doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

“Why are you making things difficult?” A deep crease cut into her forehead and she wiggled out of the hold of his hands.

His arms fell to his sides and his hands fisted, the nails digging into the palms. “Is it because of
him
?”

With her head down she took a small step backwards. “Yes.”

#

“Aside from Kate, she’s the only girl that I’ve ever confessed love to, and she just brushed it aside as if it was nothing.” Ashton danced around Kalen before he punched out with his gloved hand. He had already worked out his frustration over his afternoon meeting with Kris by destroying his knuckles against the punching bag and pushing himself through his strength training, and now he and his friend were wasting time in a match in the gym’s ring before the end of their workout.

Kalen blocked the blow with his forearms. “You are spoiled and too used to girls bending over backwards for you. With time, if you expose her to your charm, I’m sure that she’ll grow fond of you.”

Ashton’s bare feet glided over the padded canvas of the boxing ring while he looked for an opening in Kalen’s defence. “If I gave her time, she would slip even further away from me. If I even have time.” He stopped and groaned, his hands falling to his sides. How many hours were there left? There couldn’t be that many, and with the way she was acting, he doubted that she would be willing to continue to pose for him after the advance money ran out. What was he going to do?

Kalen threw a jab. His fist hit Ashton’s hip.

“Hey.” Glowering at Kalen, Ashton resumed his defensive stance, with his hands in front of his face and his shoulders hunched. “I’m pouring my heart out to you here.”

“You’re complaining because you finally met the girl who doesn’t swoon at the first sight of you.” Kalen moved to Ashton’s left side, his fist swung toward Ashton’s head. “You’ve finally met your match.”

Ashton bobbed to evade the blow. “You sound as if I’m a beast in need of taming.” Bouncing on the balls of his feet, he stepped sideways, circling Kalen. He punched out.

Kalen slid aside, evading the blow. “Some of the girls you’ve been with would agree with that and claim you only want to bed her.” He threw a quick punch at Ashton.

Ashton shifted backwards. “I’ve already slept with her.”

Kalen froze, his right arm ready to throw another jab.

Ashton took the opening and executed an uppercut.

Kalen swayed away from the hit. “You did what?” He lowered his arms.

“Bedded her.” Ashton frowned, he slowly lowered his arms too. “Why are you giving me that look?”

“I can’t believe that you slept with her.”

“Of course, I did.” Ashton rolled his eyes. “What, should I, just because she looks like Kate, deny myself the pleasure?”

Kalen, shaking his head, removed his gloves.

“I like sex and I’m good at it.” Finding a woman to open her legs for him never posed a problem and he was sure that if he wanted, he wouldn’t have any trouble getting Kris to sleep with him again, despite her reluctance. He would only have to push past her weak resistance with small, innocent-looking touches and fire up her body until she was unable to refuse him. But he didn’t want that. He wanted her willing from the start. He wished -- yearned -- for her to show him that she wanted him too, that she needed him the same way he needed her; not just with her body, but also with her heart. He snorted. Actually, he would probably have been satisfied with her initiating a kiss, something she had never done. “But I want much more than just sex. I told you, I’m serious about her.”

“What are you going to do?”

“What can I do?”

“Is she the one?” Kalen asked.

“Probably.”

“You told me that if you found the one you would fight for her.”

“To which you replied that you can’t fight for somebody who doesn’t want you. And is also sleeping with somebody else.”

“No, not Kris.”

“Yes.” Just the thought on her being with her tenant made him want to slam the guy’s head against a wall. “And the guy she’s sleeping with knows about me.” His hand flew to the back of his neck to rub it, but instead, the glove bumped against his neck. A wrinkle cut into his forehead as he raised his gaze to Kalen’s eyes. “I don’t know what to do. I need a drink.” And somebody to punch. “Let’s go drinking.”

“All right.” Kalen nodded and they headed to the changing room.

After fifteen minutes, Ashton emerged with his hair damp from the shower and with a bag of sweaty clothes hanging across his chest. He already had his jacket on and he was putting on a woollen cap, when a large hand slapped his back.

“Hey, man.”

He stuffed his hair under the cap’s edges and turned around. “Hey, Bobby,” he greeted the bulky bald man.

“I saw you in the ring. When did you start throwing punches like a girl?”

“Are saying that I’ve gone soft?” Ashton scowled.

“Am I wrong?”

“Do you want me to punch you and see first-hand? I’m just in the right mood for that.”

Bobby grinned. “You can try it.”

“Yeah?” Ashton’s eyebrows rose.

“Yeah.”

Rotating his hips and his torso, Ashton swung his arm, appearing to aim for the man’s head, but when Bobby’s arms flew up, the direction of his blow changed; he twisted his forearm and his fist hit Bobby’s stomach. It felt good.

Bobby doubled over, wheezing.

“Is that how girls hit?”

“Only the strong, pissed off ones,” Bobby mumbled between gasps.

Ashton snorted.

Bobby straightened, his breathing still slightly laboured. “Hey, why not get rid of that mood of yours two days from now? A friend of a friend is putting up something and everybody is welcome to fight, no notice needed.”

Ashton frowned, his hands flexing. With the way he was feeling lately, it would be good to be able to smash something, even if that something was another person’s face. “I don’t think so.”

“Oh, man.” Bobby slapped Ashton’s shoulder so hard it burned. “You don’t know what you’re missing. You should have come last Saturday, as a spectator if not as a fighter, you would have loved it. In the last two fights with Rick -- you fought with Rick, you must remember how strong his hook is -- there was so much blood that the floor got all slippery and we had to interrupt the fights four times to wipe it.”

From the corner of his eye, Ashton saw Kalen coming from the changing room. “You’d better go,” he said to Bobby.

Bobby glanced sideways at the changing room. “What’s he going to do, sue me? Organising unlicensed fights isn’t illegal.”

“He’ll get on my case, that’s what he’ll do.”

“Fine,” Bobby said. “I’ll text you the time and place. You’re welcome to join in.” When Kalen reached them, he gave the blond a dark gaze, then with a nod in Ashton’s direction, he strode to the training area, where the punching bags were.

“What did he want?”

“Why are you so allergic to him?”             

“I’m not.” Kalen pushed the bag he carried in his hand over his shoulder. “I’m just pushing him to see if he might listen to reason, because with you, I don’t seem to be able to knock any sense into your thick head. I don’t like you fighting. What if you hurt your hands? You earn your living with them.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Ashton tuned him out and walked to the gym’s exit onto the street. He had heard all of Kalen’s objections before. It was not as if he didn’t know the consequences of fighting, he just didn’t give a crap about them.

A vibration shook the pocket of Ashton’s jeans.

That was quick.
He pulled the phone out and checked it, expecting to see a text from Bobby, but instead it was a text from Mary.
She’s living with somebody
, the message said, and there was a picture of two people coming out of a building.

“Are you even listening to me?”

“No, not really.” Ashton enlarged the image. It showed Kris and her tenant. His jaw clenched, while anger started to boil inside him. “Look.” He flashed his phone’s display at Kalen. “I told her to leave Kris alone, and what does she do? Sends me a picture of her.”

“Who?” Kalen grabbed the phone and shifted it higher to see it better.

“Mary.” Ashton hauled the phone out of Kalen’s hands, turned it off and shoved it into his pocket. He would have to have a long talk about this with Mary. “She’s practically stalking Kris now.”